Hello again, faithful viewers! It is I, Rebecca the Raving Reporter, back with another interview, this time with our local preacher man, Josiah Sanchez.
After my interview with Buck, I thought it was only fitting to go see Josiah. After all, it was a bit of a sinful time after the questions were asked. See, Buck and I [CENSORED], so I was feeling like I needed to do some penance. I arrived in town and decided the church would be a wise place to look for Josiah. And sure enough, there he was, sanding down some wood, soaked to the bone with sweat and water (no, Kev was not there before I arrived). Anyway, here is how our interview went:
Me: Good afternoon, Mr. Sanchez. My name is Rebecca and...
Josiah: You'd like to ask me a few questions.
Me: Yes! Do you mind?
Josiah: Not at all. But you know, curiosity killed the cat.
Me: Well, it's a good thing I'm a human then, isn't it? ::laughing hysterically until I realize Josiah isn't laughing:: Ahem. Anyway, why did you really become a preacher? Was it forced on you by your father or did you decide by yourself?
Josiah: When the Lord calls, you must answer.
Me: So...God told you to become a preacher?
Josiah: Yep.
Me: How old are you, Mr. Sanchez?
Josiah: I've lived a whole lifetime and then some.
Me: Okay. What qualities do you look for in a woman?
Josiah: Strong faith, good heart...beautiful eyes.
Me: That's beautiful. It really is. ::wiping the tears from my eyes:: Do you still look for the crows?
Josiah: Every day of my life.
At this point, we were interrupted by loud shouts from outside. I recognized the voices right away.
Kev: AAH! Don't put that on! No!
Vin: I need to wear a shirt! Do you want me to walk around half-naked forever?
Kev: That's a nice thought. Give me your pants too! And gimme that shirt!
Vin: But I feel too exposed!
The voices died down, and Josiah and I went back to our interview.
Me: How long have you been in Four Corners?
Josiah: About two years.
Me: And how long have you been working on this church?
Josiah: Almost ten months.
Me: Why did you wait so long before starting work on the church?
Josiah: I had some rocks to haul before I could work on the Lord's house.
Me: Ah, of course. One last question before I go, Mr. Sanchez. What do you plan on doing to come back to the women and Jezzebelles who love you so true?
Josiah: That's between me and God. I shouldn't tell you we're going to shoot little pudding bullets at Bill Cosby during his kid show.
Me: You just told me, sir.
Josiah: You're getting your information from the wrong spirits.
Me: I don't drink. You just told me!
Josiah: ::studying his sandpaper:: Have you ever wondered what would happen if someone got their face sandpapered off?
Me: No, but I've often wondered how I can stop my urge to drink whiskey all the time.
And there you have it, the interview with Josiah Sanchez. Thank you for joining me, and be sure to come back when we learn how the west changed JD Dunne.
Rebecca
Raving Reporter Eztraordinaire
