Maybe giving Vin alcohol on top of painkillers wasn't the best thing to do, Chris thought. If Mary found out she'd be giving Chris that look. With the mood Buck was in, he'd probably take both of them aside for a stern talking to. If Nathan found out about it he'd be so aggravated he wouldn't be able to speak. But it'd been a hell of a day in so many ways; Chris knew he needed outside help to relax and he thought Vin might appreciate a change from his prescribed meds. So they sat side by side on the cement pad of Chris' low porch and drank their coffee and Bailey's."Josiah's a good man." Vin said out of nowhere. Neither of them had said anything for at least ten minutes.
"Yes he is."
"You ever think about becoming a priest?"
"I'd have to think about becoming Catholic first probably." Chris pointed out. This seemed to take Vin by surprise.
"Oh." He said. He took a sip of his doctored coffee. "Oh." He said again.
"You ever think about it?"
"Coupla times. A priest or a brother. Sent away for information from a few orders. Nothing ever came of it."
"You never told me." Chris said. Vin shrugged.
"I never told anybody."
Another few minutes of silence passed.
"I gotta tell you Vin, I don't see you as a priest." And when Vin didn't answer, Chris went on,
"Not in a bad way. Just - I don't know. Just not in a bad way."
"Doesn't matter. I don't feel much cut out to be anything. It doesn't matter." His voice was flat.
Maybe giving him alcohol on top of painkillers wasn't the best thing to do. Chris said as much to Vin, who only shrugged again.
"I don't expect it's the alcohol doing it. It's just - everything."
"That's understandable."
"You remember your first drink?"
"There have been times I was happy I could remember my last drink." Chris said. Vin gave a soft laugh, but it was too brief.
"My first was the night I moved in with my Aunt Diane, a week after my Dad died." He took another sip of his coffee. "Five days after he died, the day after the funeral. Her boyfriend gave me a glass of Coke only he'd put rum in it. It burned my mouth and when I spit it out they laughed at me."
He added very softly, "I hated it there."
Nothing occurred to Chris that he could say to Vin's revelation. Instead he reached over and laid his hand on Vin's shoulder, letting it rest there.
"You're ours now."
+ + + + + + +
Ezra left work quite late, especially for a Friday afternoon. The inquisition into the younger Mr. James' past, present, and future employment status continued to drag on, and so Ezra's persistent migraine continued to drag on. He labored his overstuffed briefcase into the passenger seat of his car and deposited himself heavily behind the wheel. He looked forward to getting home, eating dinner, and indulging himself in his secret pleasure: watching "Most Haunted" on the Travel Channel at 10pm.
So he was understandably annoyed when his cell phone rang, and he considered not even looking at it, much less answering it. But it could be Judge Travis or some other inflated dignitary who wouldn't take kindly to being ignored, so Ezra deigned to check his caller ID. He frowned in puzzlement.
Buck was calling him.
+ + + + + + +
Time seemed to move a little more slowly than usual out on the front porch, courtesy of the liquor in the coffee. Beside Chris, Vin eyes closed and his head dropped down, and he leaned against the porch railing. Early evening shimmered on the heat rising from the pavement and there wasn't enough breeze to move even the shakiest leaf on the trees. It was probably cooler in the house, but as long as Vin seemed comfortable, Chris wasn't going to disturb him.
Vin lifted his head though when the front door opened and Buck came out. Buck looked at Vin, then looked at Chris. Clearly there was something he wanted to say, but not in front of Vin.
"Well I hate to cut this party short," he said with what Chris could hear was forced cheer. "But I have got me some place to be."
"What's her name?" Chris asked, hoping he didn't sound obvious, especially when Buck gave him a wide eyed expression that meant he had no name ready to give out. But Vin seemed too drowsy to notice.
"Thanks for the ice cream." He told Buck. His voice was still barely above a whisper. "Y'gotta tell me some day how you managed t'get us all there at th'same time."
"Nope, can't give away trade secrets Vin." Buck smiled and came to stand in front of Vin. "You take care of youself; let me know if you need anything." He added the last very seriously.
"I will." And Vin dropped his head down again.
"What are you doing to the boy Chris?" Buck asked but motioned with his head that Chris should follow him to his truck. "He's plum exhausted."
"I worked a little magic with some Bailey's." Chris indicated his coffee cup as he stood to follow Buck.. "And?" he asked when they were at the truck and out of Vin's earshot. Buck took Chris' coffee cup, still half full, and drank it down in a swallow. "Might be we got trouble. I'll explain later. I gotta go."
NINETY-FOUR
‘Problem' to Chris meant stand up and fix it. It didn't mean stand around and wait. He wanted to grab Buck by the ear and drag him as far away from Vin as he needed to to get the information out of him about what ‘problem' he was referring to, and then Chris intended to act upon that information. Instead, as Buck got into his pick up, he gave a slight nod toward Vin and Chris turned to look at him, still dozing against the porch upright. Chris couldn't - wouldn't - leave him."I'll call." Buck promised before he drove away.
Chris walked back to Vin and stood in front of him. Vin blinked up at him.
"You should be in bed."
"Mmmm." Vin muttered and closed his eyes again. Chris couldn't tell if it was an agreement or not.
"Tomorrow's Saturday so you can sleep in."
"Goin' home tomorrow."
Chris didn't answer that because he was pretty sure he didn't like it and after a few moments of silence Vin peered up at him again. Even though he was tired and falling asleep, he managed an unmistakable glare.
"Well you can go home after you sleep in." Chris conceded.
"Can't waste daylight. Been sleeping in most of a week."
"And you've needed to sleep in for most of that week."
"Anybody ever tell you y'argue a lot?" Vin asked.
"Anybody ever tell you you're stubborn?"
"Mary thinks I'm sweet." Vin challenged.
"Mary has a soft spot for kid brothers." Chris wondered what kind of comeback he'd get for that, but Vin only smiled. It was sad and he was tired, but it was a smile.
"I think you're maybe gonna have to carry me up to bed."
"I can do that."
After a moment or two of consideration, Vin lifted a hand and Chris took his arm to help him stand.
"Careful, I'm injured." Vin pretended to complain.
" ‘Don't throw me down Clark.'." Chris muttered in a chirpy voice, and Vin gave him a look as he got to his feet.
"What?"
"Uh - it's from ‘Christmas Vacation'? Chevy Chase?"
Vin didn't say anything, only continued to stare at him like he'd grown two heads.
"I watch comedies." Chris finally defended himself.
"I didn't say anything."
"You were thinking it."
"I was thinking maybe you inhaled helium."
With Vin on his feet, and careful not to put pressure on his spine, Chris kept a hand on his back to guide him to the door and into the front hall.
"So - what's Buck really after?" Vin asked, his voice serious. "When he left here, he looked like he'd swallowed a hornet."
"I don't know. He said he'd call."
"Do me a favor?" Vin continued as he took tired steps to the staircase leading upstairs. "If it ain't good news - don't tell me."
+ + + + + + +
Over a dinner of macaroni and cheese, Josiah contemplated JD. Clearly he was working something over in his mind and Josiah could only imagine it had to do with Vin. Still, when JD suddenly asked, "Am I wrong?" Josiah asked him back,
"Wrong about what?"
"Wrong about - about what I think about Vin. About what happened to him."
"What do you think, exactly?"
JD either couldn't or didn't want to answer the question; he seemed to be having a hard time coming up with something to say. He looked like maybe he wanted Josiah to help him out, but Josiah wasn't about to.
"You're going to have to tell me JD. I'm not going to guess."
"Well - well - I think - I think I think -." He sank back in his chair. "Maybe I don't know what I think."
"What did you think when you first heard?" Josiah prompted. This spurred a little more thinking on JD's part; his eyebrows pulled together and he stared at the table top.
"I didn't believe it, not at first. Even though I heard them describe Vin down to his address, I didn't believe it could be him."
"Why not?"
"Because." At first it seemed like JD felt that answer should suffice. Josiah's raised eyebrow persuaded him differently. "Because - I never figured Vin to be a man who'd let that happen."
"He was outnumbered three to one."
"Still." JD said, his tone indicating he felt it was the answer to everything.
Josiah nearly insisted, ‘still what?' but instead he asked again,
"So what is it, exactly, that you think about what happened to Vin."
"I guess I think that he could've kept it from happening if he'd only fought back harder."
"Then JD - yes you are wrong for thinking that. Fighting back harder would've only gotten Vin more broken bones and more general misery and they would've raped him anyway. There's no way he - or any one of us - could've fought off three assailants."
"But something like that, Josiah. Don't you think he would've fought harder to keep that from happening to him?"
"We've established what I think: Vin fought as hard as he could and he was outnumbered and overpowered. You, on the other hand JD, you're acting like it's a personal insult that Vin was assaulted."
"I just never thought he'd let that happen to him."
Josiah was getting tired of this merry-go-round.
"Let what happen JD?"
"You know what. This. That. The-the-the…" JD stuttered into confused anger. "You know what Josiah."
"You can't even say the word JD. Yet somehow, for some reason, you expect Vin to apologize and explain why he ruined your life by being raped?"
"I didn't say he ruined my life."
"You're sure acting like he did." Josiah knew he was making JD angry and by now he didn't care. JD opened his mouth to snap something back at him, but his response was cut off by the ring of his cell phone.
"What?" he demanded of the caller. "What do you want Buck? So? Yeah, all right. I'll be right there."
JD shoved his chair back and stomped to the door.
"I gotta meet Buck at Inez's." he growled and slammed out of the rectory kitchen.
NINETY-FIVE
Trouble.Buck could kick himself. Why had he ever mentioned the word "trouble" to Chris? Chris would take the word and work at it and worry about it until it started burning a hole in his temper. The dang thing was, if it turned out to be trouble, Chris could deal with it. If it turned out to be nothing, Chris would get mad at Buck for worrying him. What a choice.
"Buck! Are you here alone?" Inez called to him, approaching the table.
"Not for long, I'm expecting JD and Ezra to join me."
"And is JD going to be running out of here again, like last time?"
"He runs this time, I aim to chase him down."
Inez sat at the table, across from Buck.
"What is going on? It's something with Vin isn't it? He was in here today with Chris and he looked about ready to jump out of his skin. Chris told me Vin hurt his back, but he didn't tell me anything else. It's got to be something more than that."
Buck considered telling and not telling. If he told, he knew that anything more than a split second hesitation would belie any casualness in the telling. Not telling would really seem suspicious.
"Vin saved his little girl neighbor from some toughs who tried to molest her. They tracked him down later and beat him."
"When?"
"Last week, a week ago. Friday."
"But -." But a frozen look suddenly came over Inez's face, and she stopped before her question was formed. The look hung there a moment or two, then cleared and she smiled. "When you seem him again, tell Vin that for being a hero, his next meal is free, whenever he wants. You'd like a beer? I'll get it for you."
She stood up and headed back to the counter. Buck called after her,
"You know I was a hero once. Sort of. Almost. If the fire department hadn't gotten there with their ladder and saved that little kitten before I had the chance..."
+ + + + + + +
JD and Ezra approached the entrance to Inez's restaurant at the same moment, and each man seemed equally surprised to see the other there.
"Ezra."
"JD."
"You goin' in?"
"After you."
"Oh no - that's okay. You go first."
"After you, please. I insist."
"You know what they say Ezra, 'age before beauty'."
"Or in this case," Ezra said tightly, opening the door and stepping inside, "'pearls before swine'."
It took JD a moment. "Hey!"
Neither man wanted to sit too close to Buck. They each pulled their chairs as close to the opposite side as possible. Silence ensued between the men for a full minute.
"Well, Mr. Wilmington." Ezra finally gave. "You've gotten us to meet you here on the pretext of a 'problem'; what would that problem be?"
Buck looked from Ezra to JD and back again.
"One of Vin's attackers is a student at St. Michael's."
"How's that possible?" JD asked.
"Criminals don't spend all their time being criminals JD," Buck said. "Some of 'em do have lives."
"How did you come by this information?" Ezra asked, a note of suspicion creeping into his voice.
"We got a hit on his fingerprints."
"After that point."
"Good old fashioned police work," Buck said.
"Good old fashioned having a friend named Larabee with access to computerized school records perhaps?"
"Ezra, does it matter?"
"Nobody is supposed to access that information without proper authorization." JD said. "It says that right on the screen. Only people with 'legitimate authority acting in the student's best interest' can access that information."
"Oh for God's sake JD, get your head out of the rule book," Ezra said, and put his head in his hands.
"You all right Ezra?" Buck asked.
"Oh, perfectly fine," Ezra answered from behind his hands. "I'm only on my - let's see - eighth migraine this week. Why, I'm good enough to run a marathon."
"I'm just saying," JD persisted, "Don't you need a warrant or something?"
"Only if it goes to trial I imagine," Ezra answered for Buck, lifting his head. "Which I am assuming it shall not. Ah Inez..." Ezra greeted her as she came to the table with Buck's drink. "I'll have a bottle of your strongest. No ice."
"I - I - I don't want anything," JD said.
"What do you really want Ezra?" Inez asked.
"What goes with codeine? Coffee, please. Just coffee."
"Have you seen Nathan?" Buck asked. Inez left to get the coffee.
"Daily. He finally gave me a prescription. What with this whole James mess and - I gather Vin was on campus today but I didn't see him. Is he - uh -" Ezra didn't seem to know how to ask the question. "Is he well? Is he recovering adequately?"
"Slow but steady. A little bit forward, a little bit back sometimes." Buck turned to JD and said pointedly, "Vin and Nettie had themselves a blow up though."
"And what? That's my fault?" JD demanded. "Why does everybody keep acting like I'm the bad guy in all of this? I'm telling you Buck, between you and Josiah yelling at me all the time, I'm getting pretty sick of this whole thing."
"There's a criminal at St. Michael's, JD. How do you feel about that? How about the little girl they tried to molest? Or all the new freshman girls starting this semester? You're security on campus. Maybe you'll care about that."
"May we put away our collective rancor for a moment and return to the matter at hand?" Ezra asked. "Why did you summon us here Buck?"
"Because - if it was just little Maria I'd get a court order to search school records and haul that fella in by his privates if I had to. But with Vin being a part of it, it could get a mite tricky. I don't want to risk blaring out what happened to him if I can avoid it. I was hoping I could persuade you fellas to help me figure something out. I'd involve Chris if I wasn't so sure he'd commit murder as soon as look at the creep."
JD didn't anything and Ezra clearly couldn't decide whether or not to say anything. Finally, licking his lips nervously, he asked,
"What information do you have?"
"This." Buck handed each of them a small square of paper. "Name and address, and what classes he's registered for this semester."
"Oh no," JD said, looking at the paper. "I know this guy."
NINETY-SIX
Although he was tired and would probably fall asleep as soon as his head touched a pillow, Vin went back out to sit on the step of the front porch. His back ached but he was afraid that if he took a painkiller on top of the Bailey's in his coffee, the result might be even more disastrous than mixing painkillers with muscle relaxants. Even though the sun was setting, the air was hot and motionless. Cowboy lay beside him on the concrete slab, panting in the heat.Despite his earlier conviction that he was going to take his life back, Vin felt unhappy. Not depressed, not suicidal, just - unhappy.
He hated the thought of going back to his apartment tomorrow, but he hated the thought of staying another day and night at Chris' home. Thinking of the wedge between him and Nettie made him feel sick but any way he thought of trying to make it better only seemed like it would make it worse.
And not just Nettie, the attack had caused a rift between him and JD and Ezra. And Nathan and Rain if they didn't get a better attitude. It was never easy for Vin to make close friends; having to start all over again with the same people seemed impossible.
The front door opened and Chris came out. He sat in the same spot he had left only a little while before. Cowboy lazily wagged his tail a couple of times then was still again.
"Weren't you going to bed?" Chris asked Vin.
"Mary gave me some more iron pills, and then - I just didn't want to be anywhere," Vin admitted.
"Wanna go for a drive? Get some air?"
"I'm so tired, I doubt I could walk as far as the driveway."
"I could carry you," Chris offered, but Vin didn't say anything. "So why aren't you in bed?"
"I don't want to be here. I don't want to be anywhere," Vin hurried to add, before Chris might think something bad. "I'm - restless I guess. I don't know. I feel like I'm waiting for a fridge or something to fall on my head."
"I know that feeling all too well."
"Does it go away?" Vin asked. Chris sighed.
"Not until the fridge falls."
+ + + + + + +
"You know him how?" Buck asked JD.
"He grew up down the street from me, my Mom knew his Mom. I saw him around campus last semester. But he's not one of the guys I heard talking about Vin last week. I didn't recognize any of them."
"He wasn't discussing Vin, yet you lifted his fingerprints from Vin's apartment," Ezra said.
"Yeah, his prints were in Vin's apartment," Buck told him.
"So, he has to be one of the attackers."
"Seems likely."
"Do you have a photo of the miscreant?" Ezra asked. "Have you ascertained that he is also one of the group that harassed Vin's young friend?"
"Not yet. I don't want her folks to go hollerin' for his head before we've got Vin's situation under control."
"Why do we have to do anything about Vin?" JD snapped.
"Because he is our friend and he has been placed in a situation as humiliating as it is excoriating," Ezra informed him.
"Why don't you speak English?" JD demanded.
"Why don't you learn English?"
"Why don't the both of you shut up," Buck insisted. He pointed at JD. "Look, I don't care why you help me but you're gonna help me nail this bastard and his friends before they hurt anybody else. He was in Vin's neighborhood, that means he was in Casey's neighborhood. Why don't you think about that and maybe it'll put a little motivation in you."
+ + + + + +
Vin laid himself down on the bottom bunk, with his bare feet flat on the mattress and his knees bent to ease the pain in his back, and his parents picture held tight against his chest to ease the pain in his heart. The sun had just about set and the fan next to the desk was blowing around air that was only slightly cooler than the outside temperature. He still felt like he was waiting for that fridge to fall on his head, but maybe that's all it was, a feeling. Tomorrow was Saturday so he didn't have to face anybody at work. He'd go to his apartment and stay there, so he wouldn't have to possibly meet Nettie out on the street. If he couldn't stay at his apartment past nightfall, then he'd come back here to Chris' place. If he could stay at the apartment, then that would be a step toward getting better.
He tried not to think about the fact that Buck knew who one of his attackers was. He hated that fact. Chris seemed to take a grim pleasure in it, saying that if the attackers were real they could be killed. That was another one of those comments that people might think Chris was exaggerating on, but that people who knew him would know was serious.
Vin held the picture away from himself and looked at it. The faces of his parents were as familiar to him as his own was, and still he felt like he could look at them forever and still not have them perfectly committed to memory.
He had mother's features and his his father's hands - both in shape and in ability. He'd never see them again in this life and yet they'd always be there.
He kissed the picture with his fingers, closed his eyes and went to sleep.
NINETY-SEVEN
Vin shut the door to his apartment, turned all the locks, and leaned back against it. It wasn't so much weariness from walking up the staircase that made him hesitate there, as it was not wanting to be any farther into the room than he had to be.There was some weariness, he couldn't deny that. Just getting out of Chris' house had been almost too hard to accomplish. Mary didn't want him to go, Chris didn't want him to go, apparently his truck didn't want him to go either since it took a few tries to get it started.
Once he finally got to his apartment building, he had to brave the short walk from parking lot to front door, consciously making himself not look toward Nettie's house, then from the front door up the stairs to his own door, trying not to drag his duffel bag along beside him in one hand while in the other hand he carried the pole fan that Chris had insisted he take. So there was some weariness mixed in with the reluctance to psychologically enter his apartment as well as physically.
Mary had insisted he have breakfast before he left and when he considered that his only alternative might be the drive through at McDonalds, he agreed. Chris had carried the duffel bag and the fan to the truck for him and offered once verbally and a dozen times non-verbally to at least follow Vin to his apartment in his own truck. But Vin turned him down. If he let Chris go with him, he might not let Chris leave again. Vin'd heard stories of parents reluctantly sending their children off into the world on their own; now he knew what it felt like to be the kid.
The apartment was hot, so Vin set about getting the fan plugged in and set up in front of his windows. Then he took his parents' picture out of the duffel bag and set it on top of the television. Then he thought about going into his kitchen to check on the condition of his refrigerator but the kitchen was still a little too close to the bathroom and Vin didn't want to wander too close there just yet. He knew he'd have to sooner or later, but just not yet.
If he couldn't go into the kitchen, he couldn't go into his bedroom, so he couldn't put away the clean clothes Mary had packed into his duffel bag. So he left the duffel bag next to the front door and went to stand in front of the fan for a bit.
It felt strange to be home, like he'd never lived here, and like he'd never been away. The smell of Lestoil and vinyl was still noticeable but less than before. The bloodstained footprints were gone from the carpet, courtesy of Chris' elbow grease, and the rest of the apartment was tidy, if still looking a little roughed up.
He considered what to do next. Normally on Saturdays, he cleaned his apartment, did the dishes, did his laundry, watched TV, surfed the web, went grocery shopping, read a book, paid his bills, ate junk food, and generally just hung out. Today, this Saturday, all he had to do was jump back into his life the way a person might jump onto a moving escalator; the first step was the hardest. Today, the apartment was clean, his dishes were clean, his clothes were clean, and hopefully he wouldn't need any groceries. Later on, he'd probably drive over to Josiah's rectory and work on that kitchen faucet, but not until later in the afternoon, coincidentally just in time for supper.
So what did that leave right now? Paying bills, watching TV, eating junk food. Sure, that would be easy. Just as soon as he could bring himself to walk that close to the bathroom to get into the kitchen.
Staying in front of the fan, Vin looked around his apartment again. He'd only lived here since January, but it was the nicest place he'd lived since his Dad died. It was the place he wanted to be when he didn't feel well. The place he watched all his favorite TV shows and all his rented videos. This was the place he invited his friends and celebrated holidays. This was home.
Considering all that, it didn't take long for Vin to make up his mind to challenge the monsters in his bathroom. He couldn't get the rest of his life back if he didn't feel safe in his own home, and he was going to feel safe. He took a deep breath and took determined steps towards the small room. He didn't even break stride when he reached out to take his parents' picture off of the TV to carry with him. He pushed the bathroom door open so hard it slammed back against the wall and he realized that his heart was pounding as he stepped into the bathroom. He didn't flip the light on, and with no window, he stood in dim shadows.
No obscene voices echoed, no ghastly visions rose up, no sickening memories overwhelmed Vin. The bathroom was as clean and orderly and quiet as the day he moved in.
He stood there and stared for a long while into that small, silent space, willing the memories to come, daring them to do their damnedest. This was his home and those memories were going to be no more substantial than the shadows he was standing in. Sure, his body still hurt and the scratches and bruises were still fading, but they would be the wounds of survival, not the reminders of failure. A crime had been committed against him. Those criminals had taken enough of his life, they weren't going to have anymore.
With one final look, Vin turned his back and walked out of the bathroom.
+ + + + + + +
Nettie carried a full plastic bag to her garbage can out back. From habit, she glanced over the fence that separated her yard from the parking lot next door, looking for Vin's truck. Usually on Saturdays when she saw his truck there, she'd call him up and invite him over for breakfast or lunch or dinner. Sometimes he came, sometimes he didn't. Usually when he did come over, he spent a lot of the rest of his day at her house, not doing much other than talking or watching TV or helping her around the house despite her telling him he didn't have to. He always seemed most comfortable when he could be doing something, changing a light bulb, fixing a lamp, tightening a door knob.
Her heart jumped when she saw Vin's truck in the parking lot. He was there, he was home. She stood there a moment, her bag of trash held motionless over the garbage can, just staring at the truck. Vin was there, in his apartment, only a hundred yards away from where she stood right now.
After a moment, she dropped the bag into the garbage can and turned to go back into her house.
+ + + + + + +
The refrigerator wasn't as bad as Vin had been expecting. Nothing green scurried away from the light, no furry shapes peered at him from behind the Velveeta. His condiments still stood grouped together on one side of his top shelf, with the loaf of whole wheat bread, jar of peanut butter and tub of butter huddled on the other side. His milk wasn't expired yet. His individual servings of chocolate pudding, Jell-O, and yogurt hadn't expired.
Life was good.
He grabbed a can of root beer from the bottom shelf, intending to stretch himself out on the couch for a morning of TV and nothing else. Behind the cardboard container though he saw a plastic container holding the remains of the potato salad Nettie had given the week before last. It was nearly empty and surely past its prime by now, but Vin didn't make a move to toss it out. He stared at it, remembering the weight of it as Nettie pressed it into his hands, feeling the warmth of her kiss on his cheek as she sent him home that Wednesday night after the impromptu barbecue in her yard.
He missed her, and he'd take every single thing back if he could. He just didn't think she'd give him the chance.
He let the refrigerator door swing shut, and went into the front room to the couch, stacking the pillows to cushion his back, and switched the TV on with his remote. Flicking through the channels he settled on a two hour documentary on haunted places in America. He'd only taken one painkiller this morning, so he wasn't falling asleep and the pain in his back was minimal at best. He set the remote on the back of the sofa, took a long swallow of root beer, and settled against the pillows for a nice, quiet morning.
+ + + + + + +
Almost without thinking, Nettie started making a lemon poppy seed coffee cake as soon as she set foot into her kitchen. Vin liked her coffee cake and as soon as it was out of the oven, she'd bring it over to his apartment and talk some sense into him. It was two days since the scene on Chris' front porch; Nettie had had time to think about it and she was sure Vin had taken some time to think about it.
If they were ever friends, and they were, they were still friends. More than friends, Vin was as much part of Nettie's family as Casey and sometimes you screamed at your family because you knew they loved you enough to forgive you. Nettie had forgiven Vin, and she'd finally forgiven herself. She hoped he'd had enough time to forgive her too.
When the bell on her timer rang, she took the pan out of the oven and set it into a brown paper bag. She folded the top over, carefully picked it up, and headed for Vin's apartment.
NINETY-EIGHT
Just as the TV program on hauntings showed an undulating, misty, dark-eyed, clearly unhappy ghoul advancing on an unsuspecting dairy maid crossing a lonely moor in the middle of a black night, a knock on his front door startled Vin. He immediately muted the TV using his remote and focused all his attention on the door. Especially the deadbolt lock. Just as he was thinking it was a stupid idea to leave the safety of Chris' house and wondering if his heart would stop pounding so fast, Vin reminded himself that he was taking his life back, and part of that was not being afraid. He got up from the couch and approached the door.As he got close to the door, there was another knock, and he reminded himself too that there was a difference between bravery and stupidity and who said he was required to answer the door just because somebody was knocking? That wasn't a law. He didn't have to answer the door.
He thought about looking through the peephole, but he was afraid he'd only see one big eye peeping back at him. Suddenly realizing he still had the remote gripped in his hand, Vin turned the locks and opened the door.
There stood one of the biggest men Vin had ever seen. Thick black hair covered his head, his upper lip, and most of the skin exposed under his white "wife beater" muscle shirt. He was tall and wide and angry looking.
"Hey Lou," Vin said, feeling his heart start to slow down.
This was Maria's father.
"You OK?" Lou asked.
"I'm gettin' there."
"I didn't get the chance to thank you for saving Maria last week, and you ain't been around since I heard you got hurt too. You know I woulda thanked you as soon as I saw you. It's only `cause I saw your truck in the lot now that I knew you're home. I had to come thank you."
"It's OK, you don't have to thank me. I -." Vin was about to say, 'I would've done it anyway.' but he couldn't say for sure right now that that was true.
"You need anything, you let me know. The fella that saves my little girl don't walk away with nothing." Lou said emphatically.
"Thanks, I appreciate that. But you don't have to - "
"We look out for each other around here. We take care of our own, you know that. You see those creeps again, you tell me and I'll cream `em from here to Bermuda for you. We take care of our own around here."
"I appreciate that." Vin said again. He knew that Lou probably could cream anybody he chose to; each of his fists had to be as big as both of Vin's put together, and he was big but it seemed to be all muscle. But his perpetual scowl camouflaged the heart that was the only thing bigger than his fists. And everybody in the building knew that his petite wife had him completely wrapped around her tiny pinky. They were two of the nicest people Vin had ever met. "I hope I never see those creeps again."
"Just the same, if I ever see `em, they're dog meat. You sure you don't need something? You ain't been home all week. My Synta thinks maybe you could use some food so she's making a lunch to bring over to you later. And supper too if you need it. Anything you need, from now until never, you just gotta ask. There's nobody in this building wouldn't do the same for you that you did for Maria."
Vin wouldn't let himself consider that statement. He knew Lou meant anyone would intervene if they saw him being harassed, but even though he knew that Lou didn't know, it felt like an inference to the rape and he wouldn't let himself think about that.
"Is Maria doing OK?" he asked instead.
"She's OK. She's out with her friends at the mall. Won't let her Mom shop for her school clothes. High school kids." Lou shook his head. "She's OK."
"I'm glad. She's a good kid."
"Pretty and smart, just like her Mom." Lou bragged. "You go back and rest now and Synta'll be by later to check on you. There's nothing that's gonna need you worrying about it for a long while."
"OK, thanks Lou. I expect to be meeting Fr. Sanchez for supper, but I'll be here until this afternoon anyway."
"OK, you rest `til then and call if you need anything. Anything."
"I will."
"OK." And Lou turned to go back to his apartment, and Vin shut and locked his door again.
+ + + + + + +
JD drove a little faster than he should have, heading for Nettie's house. He'd been awake most of the night, thinking about what Buck said - that Vin's attackers had been in this neighborhood at least once, so they could be in this neighborhood again, and that he should worry about Casey. He'd also been thinking that one of the attackers was a childhood acquaintance of his.
He pulled in front of Nettie's house, facing the wrong way down the street, and met her as she was just coming out of her house.
"Is Casey here?"
"Hello to you too," Nettie answered.
"Hi. Is she here?"
"No, she's gone to work at the market today, a friend of hers had to call in sick. What is the matter?"
"Nothing. Uh - nothing. I - uh - just - nothing." JD wanted to turn right around and drive to Bishop's Fresh Market where Casey worked and make sure was safe and okay. But he couldn't get his feet to turn that way.
"Something on your mind?" Nettie asked him.
"Y-yeah. I guess there is. Can I talk to you?"
"Of course you can. Come on in."
+ + + + + + +
Vin set himself back against the pillows on his couch and rejoined the TV program to discover the dairy maid had apparently died of fright. Now other villagers were gathering in frightened mob to discuss the possibilities.
Lou's sincere and emphatic gratitude and concern humbled Vin. Everybody in the building was friendly to everybody else; it was a small building, if people didn't get along, they generally didn't stay. But Vin had never considered that he held any special place with any of his neighbors.
Except one.
He looked around his front room, but he didn't have a picture of Nettie anywhere in his apartment. He had a couple probably stuffed in a drawer somewhere from his birthday picnic, same as he had pictures of the guys stuffed away somewhere. The only things on his wall were a small crucifix on the wall over the TV and a calendar over the stove in the kitchen. Other than that, the walls were bare.
Vin didn't know if he'd be able to look at a picture of Nettie right now; it'd probably remind him too much of what a jerk he'd been to her the other night. She'd never forgive him. She was mighty particular how she'd be treated and it sure didn't include being hollered at and called a liar to her face. She'd never forgive him.
But Vin didn't know if he could tolerate a life that didn't have Nettie in it. Whenever he was around her - used to anyway - he always felt like the person he always wanted to be. Nettie always seemed glad to see him. She fussed over him when he was sick, chided him when she thought he was wrong, listened to him when he wanted to talk, let him be silent when he had nothing else to say. She loved him maybe, and if she did, she'd forgive him. All he had to do was ask.
+ + + + + + +
Nettie led JD into her kitchen. She set the coffee cake onto the counter and addressed JD.
"Now what's all this about?"
"I know one of the fellas that attacked Vin." He blurted.
Nettie felt her left eyebrow go up so far it hurt. If it turned out that this was someone JD had exposed Casey to, she was going to dig out her husband's old razor strop and make good use of it. She didn't say anything, but JD had to know what she was thinking.
"I mean, I knew him. Back where I grew up. He lived down the street from me. I saw him around campus last semester, but I didn't - we didn't - I didn't talk to him or anything. It's not like he's my friend or anything. I just - I knew back when I was growing up."
"And how do you know who one of the attackers is?"
"Buck. Fingerprints. From Vin's apartment. They found the names of two of them anyway."
"Do they live in the neighborhood?" Nettie asked. She worried for Casey and for Vin running into them again.
"No, at least those two don't. I mean - they live in the city but over near the stadium, not around here. They don't live around here."
"And what's Buck going to do about it?"
"Nothing. Nothing yet." JD sounded nervous about something. "He doesn't want Vin's attack to be public news. But he's gonna watch them and catch them for anything else that he can."
Nettie let all this sudden information settle on her. Buck had identified two of Vin's attackers. At least one of them went to St. Michael's University. At least he did last year. She knew the world was smaller than it seemed; this was just too small.
"Is this what you wanted to talk to me about?" she asked.
"Yeah. I mean, no. I mean - you said Casey's at work? I have to go see her. I want to make sure she's - I'll see you later Nettie."
JD all but ran out of the house. Nettie shook her head and started to pick up her coffee cake to resume her trek over to Vin's, but then she changed her mind. Just because he was home, didn't mean he wanted visitors. She loved him like her own and knew that he loved her too, but that didn't mean invading his privacy was a good thing.
Before she showed up on his doorstep, she decided she'd call him first.
+ + + + + + +
Vin was in his bathroom when the phone rang. He washed his hands and hurried to check the caller ID while it was still ringing.
He smiled when he saw who was calling.
"Josiah! I was gonna call you in a little while."
"Vin - I called over to Chris and they said you'd gone home. I wanted to see how you're doing."
"OK. So far. Don't know what'll happen after nightfall, but I'm okay so far."
"Good. That's very good. I'm glad it's going well for you. I know it's a big step but it'll be worth it."
"I hope so. Lou came knocking on my door and I near had a heart attack. I sure hope it gets easier. You know, I was gonna come over later to work on that faucet."
"Any particular time in mind?"
"I thought I might come for 4:30 Mass, then work on it after that."
"Great! You can join me for dinner."
"Well, if you insist, I reckon I could be persuaded." Vin said. "But only if you insist."
"I absolutely insist." Josiah said. "I have to let you go now, I have a meeting to get to. I'll see you for Mass then."
"OK Josiah. Thanks for calling."
After they hung up, Vin decided he'd just head over to Nettie's and ask her forgiveness. If she said no, he was no worse off than he was right now. If she said yes, then he'd have a huge piece of his life back.
He turned off the TV, checked that he had his keys with him and left the apartment. Once he got to the front door, he turned to go behind the building to his truck first. He had a book on antique furniture floating around in there somewhere he thought maybe Nettie would like. He'd gotten it at a book sale at the library at the beginning of summer and never took it out of the truck. That'd be an excuse for going over to see her. That would work.
+ + + + + + +
When Nettie called, Vin's line was busy. So maybe calling first wasn't one hundred percent necessary. Even if he was still mad at her, he couldn't refuse her lemon poppyseed coffee cake, so a face to face encounter was the best bet. She picked the coffeecake up again and headed for Vin's apartment. She went into the building, climbed the stairs, and knocked on his door, feeling her heart beat harder in anticipation.
Several seconds passed and nothing happened. She knocked again. Still nothing. She couldn't hear anything through the door, and enough time had passed even if he was coming from the farthest room of the apartment. Maybe he wasn't home after all. Maybe they'd just dropped his truck off in the parking lot.
She turned to go home again.
+ + + + + + +
Book in hand, Vin took the short cut of a tight squeeze through the fence between his parking lot and Nettie's yard. He tried to act casual. He tried to look like he was acting casual. He'd taken this short cut a hundred times to her back door. This was easy. This should be easy. It was only the scariest short cut he'd ever taken in his life.
He went to her back door. Normally, he'd feel free to open the storm door and turn the knob on the inside door. If it turned, he'd go in. Could he still do that? If he rang the door bell, would it seem too much like he was trying to stay distant? If he opened the door and walked in, would it seem like he was taking too much liberty? Was life really always this hard?
He took a deep breath and quietly opened the screen door and tried the knob. The door was locked. Usually, in the hot weather, if Nettie was home, she'd hook the screen door and leave the wooden door open for ventilation. Her car was in the driveway, but maybe she was visiting a neighbor. She did that a lot. Maybe Mrs. Millette.
He gave the doorbell a try anyway, but after half a minute or so, nobody came to the door. Casey must be gone too. Maybe she was out at the mall like Maria. Disappointed, Vin squeezed through the fence again to head back to his apartment.
+ + + + + + +
As Nettie approached her house, she was sure she heard her doorbell ring. It was faint, but her windows were open and it sounded like her back door doorbell had rung. Nobody since she gave up home delivery of milk back in the 60's had rung her back doorbell, other than as a prank. She set her coffee cake down again on her front steps and walked around back to see what was going on.
+ + + + + + +
Every single time Vin had gone through this shortcut before, he'd never had any problem. Now the back of his shirt - the back of Chris' shirt - was hung up on some suddenly-come-loose wire. He knew he hadn't gained weight since the last time he was through here, why the heck was he getting hung up now? He didn't want to wreck the shirt, so he carefully shrugged out of it and slid through the fence to disentangle it. As he walked across the parking lot, he gave the shirt a careful once or twice over. The fabric was dented a little but not torn, not even a puncture. Of all the odd times for that to happen, he just didn't know.
+ + + + + + +
Coming into her yard, Nettie saw movement out of the corner of her eye and she turned to look. There was Vin, all the way across the apartment building's parking lot. He was putting that long sleeved shirt on over his t-shirt. Another two steps and he'd be around the corner of the building and Nettie was pretty sure she couldn't get to the front door of his building before he did. From somewhere deep inside, desperation filled her.
"Vin!" She called, without even thinking, louder than probably she needed to be. She'd never yelled so loudly in this neighborhood and she'd lived here since Kennedy was in the White House.
There were a few long frightening moments while she waited to see if he heard her. He had to have heard her. Mrs. Stempniak probably heard her and she was stone deaf. If he heard her and he didn't respond, she didn't know what she'd do.
+ + + + + + +
Relieved that Chris' shirt had no damage, Vin slid it back on and headed back to his apartment, his couch, and another can of root beer. He tossed the small book into the air, letting it twirl end over end a few times before he caught it again. Nettie would have to be home eventually. He'd see her before the end of the day if he had to camp out on her porch.
Just as he reached the sidewalk on the far side of the parking lot, he heard his name called. He stopped dead and turned to where it came from.
Nettie.
Standing at her fence, her hands gripping the wire so hard he could see her knuckles were white even from where he stood so far away from her.
He took one step toward her, then another, then he was running to her. She held her arms out to him and he grabbed her in a hug, even with the fence between them and she grabbed him back just as hard.
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