Guardian Stars

by Deanna

Follows The Breath in His Prayers

Nearly two years had passed since Raphael had left.

For Chris Larabee, those had been the longest two years of his life.

There were times when he almost wished he could forget, but he knew that would never happen. How could he forget the man who had brought him back to life when he had given up on himself? The man who *was* his life?

To Chris, it never felt like they'd only had those few hours together. Because during those hours, Chris had really, truly lived. And he longed to live again more than he'd ever longed for anything.

With JD, Chris could allow his sadness to show, because JD understood. During the past two years, they'd spent a lot of time talking, a lot of time making love - often with tears in their eyes, and a lot of time taking care of each other.

It had taken Chris a long time to come to some kind of terms with Raphael's absence. Truth be told, he never really had.

For two years now, there hadn't been a single day that he didn't wake up with a heavy heart. And not once had he gone to sleep at night without his last thought being of Raphael.

He had changed.

After his family's loss, he'd slowly recovered and rejoined the living. He'd had days where he hadn't remembered them and on the days where he had, the memory hadn't haunted him as much.

It wasn't like that with the loss of Raphael. He was in his thoughts every moment. Perhaps it was because in his heart, he knew that Raphael was out there, that he would - one day - come back to him.

And that was the day Chris lived for.

+ + + + + + +

Bidding his friends good-night, Chris left for home. Home... he smiled ruefully. It wasn't really home. But that little wooden shack he'd built for himself was the closest thing to it. He'd started building it just before Raphael had come to Four Corners and turned his life around. And it was there that he'd first seen him. And that kind of made it home...

He rode, deep in thought. Something was nagging at him today, even his horse could feel it. The strong black gelding was restless, shying away from the tumbleweed blowing across the narrow path; he appeared unnerved even by the buzzards hovering over the corn-field close to Chris' place.

"Ho! It's alright, boy, it's alright..." Chris tried to calm him, patting his smooth flank. But the underlying tension came from the rider, not the horse; Chris knew that, even if he couldn't put a name to his unease.

It had been a day like any other - nothing to be nervous about. In fact, things were pretty quiet in Four Corners these days. Too quiet almost, Chris thought. He didn't like it when everything was quiet. It gave him too much time to think.

When Chris got to his place, he rode around the side of the shack and dismounted. He led his horse into the small corral and brushed him down, trying to ignore the clenching of his gut which was telling him that something was wrong.

Looking up at the sky - a deep, rich blue in the sweltering afternoon heat - Chris tried to steady his breathing, telling himself that his fear was unreasonable. Fear of what? His shack was just isolated enough to keep things pretty trouble-free for him. And his reputation did the rest to ensure his privacy.

But there was something else about today. Mingled with fear was a breathless anticipation, and a premonition. Yes, that's what it felt like - something was gonna happen.

Chris trusted his instincts. They never let him down. And right then - just for a moment - he had the eerie feeling that the whole world had stopped dead. He held his breath, waiting.

There was a sound then. Maybe branches crackling in the scorching afternoon sun, or the wood of the shack contracting with the heat. Or maybe it was Chris' imagination?

But the horse had heard it too. He shied, stomping nervously.

Chris drew his gun and with narrowed eyes, looked around. The forest close to the house seemed quiet, so he turned, looking over the wide fields and towards the hills. Nothing.

And then he turned back towards the trees and what he saw made his heart sing and cry all at once...

"Raphael!" he called out, his voice faltering from his sheer elation mixed with... horror!

Dropping his gun carelessly and running forward, Chris reached out just in time to catch the Mexican as he all but fell off his horse, clutching his arm and yelping in pain when he came to stand on a profusely bleeding leg.

"I said... I would... come back for you... querido." Raphael Cordova de Martinez managed a twisted smile before he slouched into Chris' arms, consciousness slipping away from him.

Chris' throat restricted from the wealth of emotions struggling to break free. His heart was thumping so hard that it made him dizzy, and for a moment, he could do nothing but hold his lover in his arms, pressed against his heart. It was all a dream. It had to be a dream! He'd come back. Oh *Lord*, he'd come back!

When he snapped out of his reverie, the reality of Raphael's wounds forcing its way back into his consciousness, he threw his arm around the Mexican's waist and lead him towards the house, gently but hastily. He briefly paused to pick up his gun, in case Raphael was being pursued. Then he half walked, half carried the bleeding man up to the front porch and inside. He helped him up onto the single cot and quickly assessed the situation. The leg wound was worse. It looked as if it might never stop bleeding again. The arm he could take care of later.

Chris struggled to push back every other thought or feeling aside from the most immediate need to take care of Raphael's wounds. He picked up the knife from the wooden table and sliced Raphael's black pants, revealing a gushing wound in his thigh. He peeled the fabric off all around and ran his hand along the back of the leg, finding to his great relief that the bullet had gone clean through. Good, because if it hadn't, he wasn't sure if he could have gotten it out with the simple tools he kept at the shack.

"I am... sorry, querido," the Mexican groaned.

"What? What for?" Chris stammered out, beads of sweat running down the side of his face as he was busily pulling cloth away from the wound. He stood and lit the wood stove, setting a large copper pot on it to boil some rags.

Raphael drifted off again for a few minutes, but eventually, he came to and answered the question as if it had just been asked. "I'm sorry ... to put you in danger, Chris."

Chris looked at him, his chest tightening when he saw the tears in the corners of Raphael's eyes - eyes he had missed so desperately that just looking into them now, he felt like his heart would overflow.

Raphael winced, trying to clutch at his leg, but Chris gently moved his hand away from the wound, jolting even at the feel of Raphael's trembling fingers in his. But there was no time for feeling anything - Raphael's pain was obviously excruciating.

Chris' own was not much better. The sheer joy of having Raphael back was darkened by his lover's serious wounds. They would either both make it through this, or neither of them.

Chris focused. "I asked you to come back, remember?" Chris said gently. "I should have never let you go. If I'd been with you..."

"You might have been killed, querido, and I could not bear that," Raphael finished for him, his eyes connecting with his lover's.

"What happened?" Chris kept talking to try and keep Raphael conscious. He dropped a few strips of clean cloth into the boiling water on the stove and moved them around with a wooden spoon.

"Someone recognized me." Raphael attempted to laugh but the pain tearing into him changed the sound to a hoarse croak. "It seems I am worth $1000 to my patron."

"Where were you when you got shot?"

"I... am not certain," Raphael replied hesitantly. He turned his head, trying to avoid facing Chris.

But Chris had caught the hesitation and curiosity prompted him to ask again, "Where?"

Faced with those eyes he had longed to look into again for so long, for all those long months of running from the law, Raphael couldn't lie. "Purgatory."

"What??" Chris exclaimed, horrified. He moved to the side of the bed, searching Raphael's eyes for an explanation. "What were you doing in that hellhole? Any man there would kill you for a dollar." His throat constricted.

"I was on my way back to you, querido." Raphael reached out to Chris shakily, touching his cheek. "It has been too long. I could bear it no more."

Chris groaned. All that time, he had never forgotten what Raphael's touch felt like, but now that it was reality again, not just one of those feverish, maddening dreams which woke him most nights, it was even more than he remembered. "Raphael..." he whispered, taking the hand from his cheek and kissing the cold, clammy palm.

He remembered how urgently he had to take care of the wounds. "I'll have to get Nathan. I don't know what the hell I'm doin'." He placed Raphael's hand on the prone man's chest and tried to have a good look at the gushing leg wound.

"No, Chris!" the Mexican protested. "You cannot tell anyone that I am here." He looked at his lover pleadingly. "Please."

Chris frowned. "What if I can't fix you up? I just got you back, Raphael. I'm not going to lose you now. I won't allow you to die!"

"You won't?" Raphael teased, attempting a smile.

"You know I won't." Chris succumbed to the soft brown eyes with a sigh. "Oh damn, I just have to do it right." He moved from the bedside, reluctantly letting go of Raphael's hand. "I'm goin' to have to bandage your leg first. Then, I'll take care of your arm - bullet's still in, I think."

Raphael nodded, letting his head sink back into Chris' pillow with a sigh. He turned his face, inhaling Chris' scent; just as he remembered - sun, grass, cheroot smoke and musk. If he were to die right then, he'd die happy. He'd come back to the place where he wanted everything to end. He was home.

"Raphael??" Chris repeated for the third time, a concerned frown on his face.

Shaking himself out of his drowsy state, Raphael looked up at him and smiled as best he could. "I was dreaming of you, querido."

Chris beamed. "Well, you don't have to no more. You're here now. And I'm not letting you go again." When he saw the endless relief in his lover's face, he realized the commitment he'd just made. And he smiled even more.

"Chris..." Raphael whispered.

"Not now," Chris deflected reluctantly, his voice soft. He had to tend to Raphael's injuries before either of them could dare think of anything else, including each other. Any delay could be fatal.

"I need you to hold still. This is gonna hurt." Chris picked up a bottle of Whiskey from his kitchen table and poured some on one of the boiled rags. Then, biting his own lip, he placed it on Raphael's thigh, doing his best to ignore the scream of pain. He couldn't, of course. Having to hurt Raphael hurt him more than any pain he himself had ever endured. "I'm sorry," he said softly, his voice cracking under the torture of it all.

"It's... alright." Raphael closed his tear wetted eyes and sighed deeply, allowing Chris to continue cleaning and disinfecting the wound. He did his best to avoid any further screams, having noted how it upset Chris.

When he was done, Chris bandaged the wound with more of the clean rags, before going to work on Raphael's arm.

"Bullet's still in," he informed him. "I'm gonna have to hurt you some more."

Raphael looked up at him, finding the sad blue eyes searching his face. "I know. Do what needs to be done, querido. You can comfort me later." With a fiendish smile, Raphael noted that Chris cheered up visibly at the suggestion.

"I'll hold you to that." Chris prepared his pocket knife, holding it over the flame of the stove. "Want something to bite on?"

Raphael shook his head.

"Okay. Okay..." Chris took a deep breath and went to work.

+ + + + + + +

Raphael remained unconscious for hours while Chris kept watch over him. He sat on the edge of the bed, holding his hand and keeping him cool with damp cloths. The whole time, he kept talking to him soothingly.

At first, Chris just talked about nothing in particular. He just thought it a good idea to let Raphael hear his voice, in case he could hear anything at all. But soon, he began to talk to him about things that mattered.

"You remember that morning when you left?" Chris asked, the memory causing an all too familiar lump in his throat. "I stood at the livery door for Lord knows how long, regretting having let you go more than I'd ever regretted anything. I knew you had to leave, but I should have gone with you."

His hands tightened around Raphael's. "Every night, I've dreamt about you coming back. Not like this though." His eyes scanned the freshly bandaged wounds worriedly. "I should have been there. I should have protected you."

Raphael's eyelids fluttered and he grew a little more restless. Chris replaced the cloth on his forehead with a newer, cooler one. He made a decision not to say anything else upsetting.

Taking a deep breath to order his thoughts, he said, "JD is doin' okay. You'll be proud of him. Not sure he needs lookin' after anymore." He smiled. JD had been able to bring a smile to his face when nothing else could. Without him, he wasn't sure he could have survived the past two years.

Gripped by the icy realization that Raphael might have returned to find an empty shack, his lover having bailed out on him by dying of a broken heart, he leant closer, whispering, "I belong with you, Raphael. Only I didn't know 'til after you'd gone. Don't *ever* leave me again!"

"Not if I can help it, mi amor!" Raphael moaned, the pain of his wounds coming back to him the moment he woke. But it was bearable. Anything would be if he only had Chris by his side.

"Hell, you made it." Chris smiled, reaching up to feel Raphael's forehead. He was hot, but no longer burning up. Quickly getting some water, Chris returned to the Mexican's side in an instant, passing the cup to him.

"Gracias." Raphael took the offering, his hands closing over Chris' around the cup. He drank in quick gulps before sinking back against the pillow. "The bullet?"

"It's out." Chris nodded reassuringly. "You're gonna be okay," he added, more to calm himself than anything.

"Chris..." Raphael's eyes fixed on the face he had missed so much, searched for the spark of love in the blue eyes - the one he had seen there when he had left Chris. He found it immediately - so close to the surface - and smiled.

Chris returned the smile. "Anything I can do, now that I'm done hurtin' you?"

"Si." Raphael smiled, suppressing his pain for the sake of composing the right words. "Kiss me, querido."

Chris grew serious. He moved from his bedside position to lie alongside his lover. Leaning over Raphael carefully, he cupped his face and - after a long look into the feverish eyes and the face that had been with him for so long without ever growing dim in his memory - he kissed him with all the tenderness he could gather up in his beaten, jaded soul.

Raphael's lips parted with a soft moan, and he allowed his own soul to breathe again after months of pain and longing. This kiss - the hope that it would be here to give him back his soul - was what had kept him alive. He returned the kiss hungrily, his hand reaching up to move into Chris' hair and his tongue seeking out his lover's tongue the way his body would seek out Chris' as soon as he was well enough.

When they parted breathlessly, Raphael whispered, "I have been a mere shadow while I was apart from you, querido." He noted how lean Chris looked, how haunted his eyes were and how pale his skin, and he knew that his lover had been as heartbroken as he had been.

"I never should have let you from my side." Chris cupped his face and kissed him again. Like a whisper this time, but full of promises.

When he looked at Raphael again, he said, "JD would have been alright. He didn't need me."

"Yes, he did." Raphael was comforted when he found Chris stretching out close to him, their bodies touching and his lover's arm reaching around his middle.

"Perhaps," Chris conceded. "But I should have known that I could not live without you. We could have looked after him together."

Raphael's heart sang. "We will, querido. From now on, we will both watch over him. Together." Reaching for Chris' hand and placing it on his heart, he added, "We will do everything together and will never be apart again. Promise me that, mi amor."

Chris did not need to think about his answer. "I promise."

+ + + + + + +

If anyone had told Chris how he'd feel once Raphael was back with him, he never would have believed it. He'd expected joy, relief, happiness. But the permanent euphoria that had settled on him once Raphael had made it through his fever and had fallen asleep peacefully in his arms was beyond description.

He lay next to him, looking down at the now relaxed face, and knew he'd been given one final chance at happiness. This time, he would hold onto it. He would defend it with his life and give his soul for it.

"I love you so much..." he whispered, swearing to himself that he would repeat it aloud as soon as Raphael woke up next.

And then he realized that the beautifully curved lips were forming a smile. "Te amo también, querido."

Raphael reached up, moving one hand around the side of Chris' neck. Only then did he open his eyes.

Chris was humbled by the love he saw in the deep, dark depths of his lover's eyes. He turned his face and took hold of the hand against his neck, raising it to kiss the palm tenderly while intertwining his fingers with Raphael's. "I've been through hell," he confessed. "I never knew anything could hurt this bad!"

"Every night, I thought of coming home. To you," Raphael said softly. "And every day, I thought about the danger I would be putting you in if I came back too soon."

Chris was about to speak, but Raphael pleaded with his eyes. He had more to say. "I pray with all my heart that I did not come back too early, but Chris... I could not bear it any longer." With passion in his voice, he added, "I would rather die than be apart from you ever again!"

Chris blinked, fighting a losing battle against the tears he knew he couldn't stop. Not this time. Not in front of the man to whom he could bare his heart and soul. He wanted to speak, wanted to tell Raphael how much he needed him, but his voice was suffocated by his tears.

Raphael reached for him, drawing him into a careful embrace, and Chris cried until Raphael could no longer hold back either.

And they cried together - bitter tears for the time they'd spent apart, and sweet ones for the future.

It was the middle of the night when Chris woke again, forcibly propelled into consciousness by a particularly disturbing nightmare. But when his eyes opened and fell on his lover by his side, he breathed a sigh of relief.

He was still having a hard time believing that the wait was over. That Raphael had come back. It was enough to make his heart burst!

Chris was grateful that the moon lit the interior of the shack just enough to let him gaze at his Mexican angel - bathing them both in soft blue and silver hues of light, shining through the cracks in the wood and the single window... it reminded him of that night at the Livery.

He looked at Raphael, drinking in the handsome features, relieved that Raphael's fever had disappeared almost miraculously once they'd been lying together for some time. Just the way his heart had stopped aching. It was as if their sheer togetherness protected and healed them both.

Chris ran his index finger tenderly over Raphael's face - over his cheeks, past his slightly parted lips, around his nose, over his closed eye lids... anyone watching would have been amazed that a man like Chris Larabee was capable of such tenderness.

As hard as Chris tried, he didn't manage to avoid waking Raphael. "Damn, I'm sorry," he whispered. "You ought to be sleeping, getting as much rest as you can."

Raphael stilled Chris' hand, holding it against his cheek. "Being with you is all I need, Chris."

Smiling, Chris returned the grip on his hand, intertwining their fingers. "Looks like I can't keep from touching you," he said. "I guess I'm still makin' sure you're here."

"What does your heart tell you?" Raphael asked, shifting Chris' hand downwards to cover his own heart.

Chris didn't need to think about his answer. "It hasn't felt better than this for two years. There's only one thing that can make it that way."

Raphael looked at him with such intensity that Chris knew he could see right into his soul. So he opened it up for him to get a real good look, letting all his emotions shine from his eyes and from the openness of his face. He never allowed anyone else to see him that way - it wasn't safe.

Raphael must have liked what he found, because he sighed softly, pressing Chris' hand closer to his chest. "I can see, querido," he said with infinite softness.

They lay together, completely still, for a few minutes, bathing in each others' eyes, needing to feel that close.

Finally, about to lay back and try to go to sleep again, Chris realized that neither of them had eaten anything since the afternoon. It simply hadn't occurred to them. He smiled. "Are you hungry?"

"Si. Very much so." Raphael's full lips formed into a truly ravenous smile. His voice dipped lower and grew more hoarse when he added, "I am starved for you, querido..."

Chris shuddered, his flesh crawling pleasurably from the open desire in Raphael's voice and his gleaming eyes. He leant down, his lips not quite touching the corner of Raphael's mouth. "And I am for you," he whispered, before letting his tongue snake out to lick at the seductive lips. He watched them part in an invitation as irresistible as being offered a spot in heaven. And that was exactly what Raphael's mouth was for him - heaven. Paradise.

Their lips moved together while they sated themselves on each others' tongues, struggling to be as close as they could. As close as Raphael's wounds allowed it for now.

Frustrated, Chris drew back. "Damn, I want you so much, Raphael!" he exclaimed passionately, running a hand through his sandy hair until it stood on end. He looked at the trembling, kiss moistened lips and added with a sigh, "You gotta heal real fast, promise me that!"

"I will," Raphael declared, smiling at how vulnerable Chris looked with his hair in such disarray. As for him - only his panting breaths and clenching fingers gave away how his immobility irritated him. He wanted to tell Chris that he'd be glad to take the chance, but he knew that his wounds - especially his leg wound - were too severe for much movement just yet. He would most certainly undo all of his lover's hard work and tear them open again. No - no matter how much it pained them both, they would have to give it a few days.

"For this alone I should kill the son-of-a-bitch who did this to you!" Chris said, anger seeping into his voice.

Raphael calmed him with a slow smile and a hand stroking his cheek. "We'll just spend all that much more time just lying in each others' arms, mi amor." And he opened his arms to receive Chris who carefully lay down pressed to his uninjured side.

"Where have you been, Raphael?" Chris asked, his face against his lover's neck, inhaling his scent.

With a sigh, Raphael replied, "I feel as if I've been everywhere. I traveled North, mostly, but not the direct route. I lived in Indiana for a while..."

Chris smiled ruefully at the irony. "I'm from Indiana," he said.

"Then it is no wonder it seemed a more welcoming place than any other I saw." Raphael kissed Chris' forehead lightly before continuing, "I finally made it to Alaska."

"Alaska?" Chris asked, shuddering at the thought of just how far apart they'd been.

Raphael sighed. "The cold suited the cold in my heart."

"Hey..." Chris turned Raphael's face towards himself with a couple of fingers under his chin. He waited for their eyes to focus on each other in the near darkness. "I'm gonna warm that heart of yours right through again, angel."

In a soft whisper, Raphael brushed his lips past Chris' ear. "You already are, mi amor." He kissed the soft spot below the earlobe, letting his tongue flick against it for a moment. The tender little touch caused a shudder to run through the body in his arms and he was certain he could hear Chris' heart beat a little louder.

They stayed that close, breathing each other softly, remembering the scent, the warmth and the feel of each others' skin.

Chris nuzzled Raphael's neck. "I remembered every moment we had together. The whole time you were away, I kept thinkin' of you."

"So did I, querido. You kept me alive." Raphael closed his eyes, his lips soft against Chris' cheek while his fingers threaded into his lover's hair. "I never made a home anywhere. I knew no place would feel like home. Not when my home was right here. With you."

Chris sighed. "Did you stay anywhere for long?"

"Never for more than a few weeks. It wasn't safe." Raphael kissed the corner of Chris' mouth. "I didn't know who was looking for me, but I knew that my patron would pay a handsome prize for me. I couldn't stay anywhere long enough to risk being recognized."

"How did you get out of Purgatory?" Chris asked, suddenly realizing that Raphael was by no means out of danger.

"I was shot riding out of town, and pretended to be hurt so bad that I would not get far." Raphael took a deep breath. "I believe they expected to find my body not far away."

Chris snarled. "I bet they were falling over each other, fighting which one of 'em would get to collect."

Hearing the hatred in Chris' voice, Raphael soothed him with another kiss on his lightly stubbled cheek. "I'm afraid none of them will. And Chris..."

"Yeah?"

"I made sure I was not followed."

Chris settled back, resting with his head in the crook of Raphael's neck. He took hold of his hand. "If anyone finds you here, they're gonna have to kill me first to get to you."

"That will not happen," Raphael assured his lover with a slightly trembling voice. He knew that if it ever *should* happen, he would do the bounty hunters' work for them. His warrant did say 'dead or alive'.

+ + + + + + +

For the following two days, they alternated between holding each other tenderly and talking for hours on end, and all through that time, Chris kept cleaning Raphael's wounds and changing his bandages meticulously.

He was relieved to find that Raphael possessed sheer infinite healing power. Or maybe it was willpower. Whatever it was, he healed quickly and without complications.

Even so, Chris wouldn't allow him to get up for more than a few minutes at a time, and even then he supported him diligently, taking him for a brief walk outside to let his weakened body soak up some sunshine and fresh air.

"It is so beautiful here, querido." Raphael looked out over the grass, watching it sway gently in the late afternoon breeze.

Chris smiled, tightening his grip around Raphael's waist. "It is *now*," he said.

Raphael turned to face him. "Home."

"Home," Chris agreed.

They sat down for a while, enjoying the warmth and the glow of the sun as it slowly changed from a luminous orange-gold to a pale red. "I should put you back to bed soon," Chris said, touching Raphael's hands which lay folded in the Mexican's lap.

"Care to join me?" A fiendish smile lit up Raphael's face and caused his eyes to sparkle.

"Do I ever! But I'm not sewing you up all over again," Chris said regretfully. "Soon, though..."

"I know. I'm being impatient, querido." Raphael smiled.

Chris' lips quirked up lightly. "Wouldn't want it any other way." He stood and reached out for Raphael, who took his hand and let himself be led back inside and pressed gently down into one of the chairs at the kitchen table.

"Dinner will be ready soon," Chris announced while stirring the pot of pea soup. When he turned to face Raphael, he found him smiling brightly. "What?" he asked, chuckling.

"I don't think you will ever stop surprising me, Chris. Just think... you an me, sitting on the porch until nightfall, then... you cooking us a meal... like an old couple."

Chris grinned. "Does that scare you?"

"No." Raphael didn't need to think about it. "I think it's wonderful. And I would not mind if we did grow so old and comfortable." His expressing saddened a little.

Chris felt Raphael's worry, and he shared it. "It won't be that way," he said hesitantly.

"No, it won't." Raphael sighed. Life wasn't like that for men like him and Chris. He smiled softly. "What matters is that we are together, whatever the future holds, querido. And we will be together."

"Yeah." Chris came to stand by Raphael's side and placed a hand on his shoulder, squeezing gently. They were sealing a pact.

Raphael took his lover's hand and lifted it to his lips, kissing the palm. "Te amo," he said.

"Te amo tambien," Chris responded, meeting Raphael's eyes gazing up at him.

And then they heard it, or perhaps sensed it. A horse and rider, approaching the shack.

Raphael jolted and Chris reached for his gun laying by the side of the bed. He picked up Raphael's also and asked with a doubtful look, "Think you can shoot yet?"

"Si." Raphael took the gun offered, turning on his chair so he could face the shack's single entrance.

Chris cautiously walked towards the door and took up position to one side of it when someone burst in, gun pointed right at him. An instant before he pulled the trigger and sent the intruder to hell, he realized who it was and his heart began to pound in horrified anger. "JD!"

The youth stared at him for a moment, pale as a sheet. "I know! I shouldn't... stupid. But damn, Chris!! I could swear that horse out there..."

And then JD saw the smile creeping over Chris' face and the expression of total happiness he hadn't seen since one particular night two years ago, and he squealed. "CHRIST!" His head shot around and his own eyes were met by a smiling pair of dark orbs.

"RAPHAEL!!!" JD dropped his gun and covered the few feet between door and table, falling on his knees and landing in between Raphael's legs and in his welcoming embrace. He was clutching him too hard, he knew it, but after all this time... He simply couldn't let go.

When he heard a moan of pain from Raphael, he finally loosened his grip a little. "Geez, I'm sorry," he offered regretfully, drawing back a bit and realizing he'd been leaning hard against a bandaged thigh. And Raphael's arm was bandaged too! "You're hurt!" he exclaimed, horrified.

Raphael nodded but smiled, stroking JD's disarrayed hair back from his face. "I was shot on my way back, mi amado. But I'll be alright." He drew the long-missed, sweet face forward and bestowed the most tender of kisses on the trembling lips.

JD sighed into the kiss, his arms gently slung around Raphael's neck, careful not to cause further pain.

Chris stood by the door, smiling. He picked up JD's gun and deposited it on the table before sitting down on the chair closest to his lovers.

When Raphael released JD, the youth turned back towards Chris and beamed. "See, Chris. Told ya he'd come back."

"Yeah, you did, JD." Chris reached out and gently stroked over JD's head. "You did."

Raphael saw a shadow passing over Chris' face, and he knew exactly how much pain Chris was reminded of. To lighten the mood, he drew JD into his lap - careful not to let him sit on his injured leg - and teased with a smile, "Thank you for looking after him for me, JD."

"Ha!" JD grinned from one to the other, his arm around Raphael's neck. "That was no easy job, ya know," he said, growing serious when his eyes met Chris'. He wondered if he shouldn't have said that, but he knew there simply was no such thing as a secret between Chris and Raphael.

Chris nodded. "That's right. He did a much better job taking care of me than the other way 'round." He affectionately smiled at JD and looked over the youth's shoulder into Raphael's sympathetic face.

Raphael sighed softly, squeezing JD tightly against himself. With his eyes firmly locked with Chris', he softly murmured again, "Muchos gracias, JD."

JD nuzzled against Raphael's neck, letting his head rest there comfortably and enjoying being rocked slightly while Chris stood up with a smile, heading over to the stove.

"Dinner everyone?" Awaiting the enthusiastic response, he served up the soup, and JD reluctantly left his comfortable position atop Raphael's knee and settled down in the chair next to him instead.

"What made you come out here today, JD?" Chris asked, breaking some bread into a small basket on the table.

JD stopped blowing into his soup to cool it down. "You ain't showed up in town for a couple of days, Chris, and I thought maybe..." He looked over at Raphael, then at Chris. "Maybe... you had another bad spell."

"Thanks," Chris responded. "Glad it was you who came."

JD grinned. "You think anyone else would dare? If you were in a bad mood, that is. But I don't s'pose you have been, huh, Chris?" He winked at Raphael and began slurping soup off his spoon.

Raphael chuckled and Chris joined in. "No, I wouldn't describe what I've been feelin' lately as a bad mood," Chris confirmed. His eyes met Raphael's and held them in a heated and hungry gaze.

JD grinned. "Darn bandages, huh?"

The three of them laughed. More light-heartedly so than any one of them had for some time.

A little while after they'd finished their meal, Chris and JD forced Raphael back into bed, only succeeding by promising they'd both stay with him.

Raphael smiled warmly, extending his arms out from his sides and receiving them both in his embrace. He sighed with contentment. "This is what I've been dreaming of every night."

JD gave him a peck on the cheek before snuggling close, and Chris leant on one elbow and kissed Raphael deeply before murmuring in his ear, "I love you."

Waiting for a smile and the whispered response in kind, Chris lay down, his arm over Raphael's middle and his hand on JD's waist.

They slowly drifted off to a relaxed sleep, full of hope for the future.

One day at a time.

+ + + + + + +

JD was running... running like the wind. At first he had thought he was running away from something, but then he realized that he was going after someone. Had to get to them. Find them in time.

Buck was there, too, right by his side.

JD was panicking because they'd lost too much precious time and the danger was lurking so close-by. But all he could do was keep running until he thought his lungs would burst and his legs would give in under him.

"We'll never make it!" Buck called out to him, but they both kept running.

"We have to! We just have to!!" JD yelled, trying to go even faster.

"JD!!" Buck screamed, suddenly turning and running right into JD's path. He pulled JD into his arms and stopped him dead, struggling to hold onto him.

"Let me go, Buck!! Damn you!" JD was crying.

"No, JD! Stop!!" Buck turned them both 90 degrees and JD saw that they'd run right up to the edge of a cliff. Buck had saved his life by a hair's width.

"We're too late now..." JD sobbed and Buck held him close, stroking over his hair and whispering soothingly to him.

JD tried to tear himself away, his eyes wild. He tried to get to the edge, but Buck was doing his best to stop him. "I have to see them. They're down there!"

"No, JD. Don't! Please don't." It took all of Buck's strength to hold JD back. His arms were around JD's middle and he held him as tight as he could. The boy was fighting him like crazy.

They kept getting closer to the edge of the cliff as they continued struggling. And when they got there, JD looked down. Into an endless abyss. "I can't see anything!" he yelled.

The abyss turned into light. Pure light which filled the whole valley below and drifted upwards, as bright as the sun.

JD stared at it, sobbing. Buck was clutching him in mortal terror that the boy would jump down into the valley below.

"It's alright," he kept murmuring. "It's alright..."

"I know." JD turned to face him with a tear-streaked face. "Can you feel it? It's warm."

Buck nodded. Yes, the light was warm and soothing. He crushed JD close, wrapping his arms around him like a shield. "It's alright," he repeated, and he felt JD nodding against his chest.

+ + + + + + +

JD woke himself with his own sob. He sat straight up in Chris' bed, sweat pouring off him even while he trembled and shivered. He looked to his side and found Raphael and Chris sleeping peacefully in each others' arms. He swallowed hard.

Being careful not to wake them, he climbed out of bed and padded across to the night stand where he poured some water into the washbowl. He splashed his face - which was stinging from crying in his sleep - and walked through the kitchen and outside.

Once he'd closed the door behind himself, he leant back against the wooden hut and took a shuddering breath. Then he slowly slid down the wall and sat on the cool porch, hugging his knees and letting his head drop forward and rest on his arms.

He sat like that until he felt chilly, but still he couldn't go back in. He wasn't surprised that he should react like this to Raphael coming back. He could only imagine how Chris had felt, and the whole thing was probably just too much for his emotions. But he cursed himself for still feeling panicked even now that he was awake.

"JD..."

JD felt a hand on the nape of his neck, and looked up into Raphael's face.

"Are you alright, mi amado?" Raphael noticed that JD's hair was damp, and when he drew him to his feet, he realized the boy was soaked with sweat. "JD!" he said anxiously, hugging the shivering bundle close.

JD let himself be held, clutching Raphael's shirt and rubbing his cheek against the skin-warmed fabric over the Mexican's chest. "I'm... I'm okay," he murmured, belying his words with the sob which accompanied them.

"No, you're not," Raphael said sternly, not letting go of JD. "Tell me."

"It's silly. It was just a dream."

"A dream bad enough to scare you like this, JD, is worth sharing." Raphael led JD to the stairs at the end of the porch and drew him down next to himself. "Go on, tell me."

JD licked his lips, tasting his tears, and started relating his dream.

Raphael listened, stroking JD's damp cheek with the thumb of his left hand and holding both the boy's hands in his right. Once JD was finished, he said, "You're afraid for us."

JD looked down. "I guess I can't really deny it."

Raphael lifted JD's chin. "I can't promise you that everything will be alright, but what I *can* promise is that both Chris and I will look out for you as well as each other."

JD nodded, sniffing. "What do you think it means? The dream?"

"I'm not sure." Raphael kissed JD on the cheek. "Not all dreams mean something, and certainly not all dreams come true."

"I s'pose," JD agreed hesitantly.

"Don't worry about it, amado." Raphael put his uninjured arm around JD's shoulder. "We will be alright."

"Will you tell Chris about it?" JD asked.

"If you want me to."

JD nodded. "Maybe. As a warning or somethin'. "

"Whatever you want, JD." Raphael smiled into the boy's face before leaning down to kiss him tenderly.

JD returned the kiss eagerly, reaching around Raphael's neck with one hand and burying his fingers in the lush dark hair. It was so good to be held like this. To feel that wonderful mouth on his own and to taste Raphael again.

"I missed you so much," JD murmured when they finally broke from the kiss.

"I missed you too, mi amor." Raphael kissed the tip of JD's nose playfully. "I've often thought about holding you. Feeling you trembling in my arms again. I've missed your sweet smile, JD."

JD blushed. "What sweet smile?" he asked, embarrassed.

"This one." Raphael traced JD's lips with his thumb, only to find it drawn into the warm, wet cavity. "And I've missed your not so angelic deceptions, too." He smiled.

JD sucked on Raphael's thumb, holding his hand steady. And then, before letting go of it, he held it to his lips for a moment, kissing it tenderly. "Can't wait for you to heal, Raphael," he said huskily.

Raphael's voice was not quite steady either when he promised, "I will hurry."

"You probably ought to get plenty of sleep, huh?" JD said reluctantly.

"Yes, I'm afraid so." Raphael stood shakily, pulling JD up as well. "Lets go back to bed before Chris wakes up and worries. And this time, we'll dream something nice."

JD nodded. "Promise?"

"Promise." Raphael kissed JD again. "We'll dream of the day Chris relieves me of my bandages." He laughed softly.

JD's eyes sparkled. "Alright then. Lets go!" And he took Raphael's hand and drew him after himself impatiently, back into the house and back to bed.

+ + + + + + +

Woken up by the smell of fried bacon, Chris opened his eyes slowly and reluctantly, at least until he realized he was in Raphael's arms. It took some getting used to after all those mornings of waking up to emptiness, to finally find him right there against his heart, where he belonged. He smiled. "Hey..." he whispered into the ear closest to him.

Raphael murmured something in his half-asleep, half-awake state before turning his face and rubbing his stubbled cheek against Chris'. "Mmmmm..." The Mexican drew the warm body in his arms closer and kissed the smirking lips.

"Hey, you two. Time to get up," came a soft voice from the doorway.

Chris groaned. "Not yet, JD."

"Yes, right now." JD came closer, settling down by his side. "I've made breakfast."

"He's so sweet," Raphael mocked, still half dozing.

"If you weren't injured, you wouldn't get away with that." JD laughed.

"But I am." Raphael opened his eyes and winked at JD sleepily. "I meant it, too."

JD grinned. "Get up you two."

Chris moved into a sitting position. "I have a better idea."

"He's not well enough for that yet, Chris." JD giggled.

Chris and Raphael exchanged a look.

"It looks like he's lost what little innocence he had left during the last two years," Raphael said, earning a snort from Chris. "I wonder who did that?"

"I *was* going to suggest breakfast in bed," Chris said with exasperation. "If JD doesn't mind bringing it all in here."

"Great idea, Chris!" JD jumped up and hurried back to the kitchen.

Raphael rubbed up against his lover. "I love the way you smell when you first wake up, querido..." Raphael murmured, nuzzling Chris' neck and letting his tongue flick out against it.

"You're not being fair," Chris gasped, his hand straying to Raphael's stomach and inching lower. "Teasin' me like that every morning when I can't touch you..."

Raphael made a little rumbling sound against the pulse at the base of Chris' neck. "Then touch me," he said roughly. "I'm sure I'm up to it now."

Chris moved his hand lower... lower... "Oh yeah," he croaked, not master over his voice. "I think you may be right." His hand closed over the bulge in Raphael's groin, rubbing slowly, feeling the heat pouring off his lover's body and seeping into his own.

Raphael groaned and bit down lightly on Chris' neck, causing a moan of protest, followed by a shudder shaking Chris' entire body when his tongue soothed the bite mark he would undoubtedly be leaving.

Chris shifted closer, forgetting for a moment that he was rolling on top of Raphael's thigh until he heard a whimper of pain. "Shit!" he exclaimed. "Are you alright, angelo?"

"Si," Raphael croaked.

"Can't I let you two out of my sight?" JD chided playfully from the doorway. He carried a tray of food across the room. "Be careful with him, Chris." He chuckled.

"I'm tryin', JD!" Chris sounded exasperated. He sat up and leant back against the headboard. "You've only had to resist him for one night. I've been doin' this for days. I think I'd prefer to be roasted over a slow-burning fire."

Raphael laughed shakily, still recovering from the searing pain in his thigh.

JD grinned. "Have some breakfast, Chris," he said, inserting a length of bacon into Chris' open mouth before he could voice a protest.

"That's what I was tryin' to do," Chris mumbled, earning more laughter. "And I'll work out how sometime soon..." he added more quietly with a sideways glance at Raphael and a twinkle in his eyes.

JD licked the bacon grease off his fingers and passed the tray to Chris to hold while he climbed onto the foot of the bed, facing Chris and Raphael. "This is the life, ain't it?" JD declared with a grin.

"Mmm..." Raphael agreed, chewing on a piece of cheese. "Delicious, JD."

Chris chuckled. "He didn't make the cheese, Raphael, he's just serving it up."

"I wasn't talking about the cheese, Chris," Raphael responded, winking at JD.

Giggling, JD reached for a cup of coffee from the tray. "You know, Chris, Buck is gonna come looking for ya soon," he stated. "He's been askin' anyway. I had a hell of a job keeping him away this time."

"I know," Chris agreed. "But he'll come lookin' for you before he comes for me, JD." He grinned.

"What do you mean?"

Raphael laughed softly and Chris added, "You'll find out soon enough, JD."

JD frowned at him and Raphael figured he'd better change the subject. "I've been thinking..."

Chris looked at him questioningly.

"JD recognized my horse yesterday. I'm not sure anyone else would, but it's possible."

"Damn, you're right." Chris took another sip of coffee before setting his cup down hard on the tray in his lap. "We gotta get rid of it."

"You ain't gonna kill it, Chris?" JD asked, horrified.

"Would be the safest way," Chris stated matter-of-fact. Before JD could protest, he continued, "Think about it, JD. If we sell it, someone could trace it back here. If we just let it go, it might lead someone back. But if we..."

"Shit!" JD exclaimed.

Raphael looked at the boy with concern. "There must be another way," he said softly.

"Don't know of one," Chris stated. "I'm not riskin' *you* for the sake of your horse, Raphael," he said firmly.

Raphael nodded slowly. "We should think it over."

"Precious time." Chris gave him a tilt-of-the-head.

JD bounced up on the foot of the bed. "I have an idea."

Looking at him expectantly, Chris and Raphael burst laughing when he suggested, "Lets paint it."

"That's impossible, JD!" Chris exclaimed.

Raphael, however, said thoughtfully, "Perhaps not."

"What are ya gonna paint it with?" Chris asked, grinning.

JD smacked his forehead. "Berries! The juice from berries. I remember where I heard of it now. Ya know Miss Laura? She's that pretty young lady who lives just out of town. She was tellin' me and Buck once about how her cousin smuggled a horse for her up from Mexico - a rare white stallion, some special kind of horse they only have south of the border..."

Raphael nodded. Yes, he knew the breed. His former patron had owned a couple of them.

JD continued eagerly. "Apparently, her cousin stained the horse with berry juice and got it here just fine."

Chris laughed. "Right."

"It's true." JD was a little indignant. "The color lasted for weeks. Would be easy enough to just do it again when it wears off."

Raphael suggested, "It's worth a try."

Chris sighed. "I can't believe we're even considering this."

"There are some berries growing by that forest right out here, aren't there?" JD asked eagerly.

Chris nodded.

"Alright. I'm gonna get some and we'll try it." With that, JD jumped off the bed, causing the tray on Chris' lap to damn near tip over. He grinned and took off, leaving Chris to give Raphael an exasperated look.

"You know, he's really starting to make me soft."

Raphael smiled and moved in close enough for a kiss without quite touching Chris' lips. "And you love him for it."

Chris smirked. "Yeah." He kissed Raphael. "You're right. As always."

+ + + + + + +

When JD got back, carrying a bucket of berries, Chris and Raphael were waiting for him on the porch.

Chris, in addition to his undershirt and dusty jeans, was wearing a smirk, making no secret out of his feelings on the whole plan.

"Gimme a hand here, fellas," JD said, setting down the bucket by the corral and rolling up his sleeves.

"Alright." Chris sauntered over to join JD and Raphael who were gathering up a couple of sponges and cloths. "How do you wanna do this, JD?"

"I guess we gotta crush them with somethin' and then we'll sponge them on, huh?"

Chris raised his hands, shrugging. "Don't ask me. I ain't Miss Laura."

"Real funny."

Raphael observed the exchange, smiling and scratching his chin. Then he walked away and into the house to return with a potato masher moments later. "This should work," he said, putting it to the test. It did work.

"Alright, this I wanna see." Chris leant against the corner of the corral with his arms crossed, having decided he wasn't gonna be doing it.

JD grinned and picked up the bucket. He entered the corral, petting Raphael's horse and soothing it with soft words. "What's his name?" he asked.

Raphael too was leaning on the fence, with his chin on his forearms, watching. "Tranquilo. If you need help, amado..."

"Nope. Got it all under control. What's 'Tranquilo' mean?"

"Gentle."

"Maybe he won't kick me for doin' this then." JD went to work sponging the berry juice along the horse's neck.

Tranquilo turned his head slightly, nodding. He was curious what was happening, but didn't seem to have any problem with it.

"Good boy..." JD said softly.

"And pretty too," Chris said dryly, watching the hazel brown horse slowly turn into a deep chestnut one. Minutes later, he said, "Looks like it's workin'."

"Try not to sound so surprised," JD said a little triumphantly. Standing back to look at his work, he stated proudly, "I think I've done a damn fine job here."

"You certainly have, JD." Raphael closed the corral gate once JD had come out again. "And you saved his life, too." He briefly lifted JD's hand to his mouth and kissed it, berry stains and all.

JD swiped at Raphael's lips. "You got some juice there..." Standing on tiptoes, he flicked out his tongue and licked a drop off Raphael's chin.

Chris took the bucket from JD's grasp and with a grin, went off and took it behind the shack to wash it out. Wouldn't do any good to leave it around for people to see.

"Chris!" he heard JD call out frantically moments later.

Chris turned back and, drawing his gun, came back out from behind the house. "What's the matter, JD?" he called out.

"Buck."

"Damn!" Chris realized within an instant that there was no way Buck would not have seen Raphael by now. Coming from town, there was only open land in between any man riding towards the shack and the three of them. "Sorry," he whispered when he came to stand next to Raphael.

Raphael shrugged. "You would not be able to hide me out here forever, querido."

"S'pose not," Chris agreed, depositing his gun back in its holster. He stood with his hands on his hips, watching Buck ride towards them.

"What do we do, Chris?" JD asked.

"Not much we can do other than tell him, I guess." Chris looked at Raphael. "Alright?"

"Si. We will have to." Raphael nodded his agreement.

+ + + + + + +

"Chris?" Buck stopped his horse next to them, glancing at Raphael before giving Chris a confused look.

"Mornin', Buck." Chris registered the question in his old friend's eyes. Buck was obviously trying to work out what was going on.

"Senor Wilmington." Raphael greeted.

"Didn't think we'd be seein' you again," Buck declared, dismounting and shaking Raphael's hand. "How have you been?"

"Lately, very well, thank you."

Buck squinted, trying to figure out just what the relationship between Chris and the Mexican was. They were looking damn comfortable with each other. He couldn't help but wonder if there was something he didn't know about.

JD smirked. "What are you doin' here, Buck?"

"I came lookin' for you..." Buck cleared his throat, his gaze quickly shifting from JD to Chris. "Two."

Chris grinned. "You'd best be comin' in, Buck." He put a hand on his friend's shoulder and led him to the shack.

Raphael and JD exchanged a bemused look. This should be interesting.

+ + + + + + +

"You're what??" Buck squealed, looking like he was going to lose his balance.

"Lovers," Chris supplied while Raphael kicked a chair underneath Buck on his way past the other man, preventing him from falling flat on his ass.

JD chuckled.

"Now hold on," Buck said, steadying himself with his forearms on the table. "You're not tellin' me that..." He nodded towards Raphael. "He's been livin' here all that time without anyone knowin' about him?"

"Unfortunately no, Senor." Raphael reached to the side board for a cheroot, lighting it and settling back comfortably in his chair.

"Which part?" Buck asked in confusion.

"Both, I regret."

"He only got back a few days ago," Chris informed Buck, taking a second cheroot from Raphael's outstretched hand and letting him light it.

Buck watched the heated look they exchanged over the lit match and shook himself. "Damn!" He slammed his hand down on the table before rubbing it over the nape of his neck. "Hold on. When... did you, I mean... um..."

"Before Raphael left," JD said innocently from his position behind Buck where he was leaning against the stove.

This caused Buck to spin around on his chair. "How the hell do *you* know, JD?"

JD bit his lip.

Buck's jaw dropped. He looked back and forth between Chris, Raphael and JD. "Hell!" He slumped in the chair.

"You're kinda white, Buck. Do you want a whiskey or somethin'?" JD offered.

Chris let out a snort.

Buck looked back at JD. "I knew that you and Chris... " He cleared his throat. "But..." He cast a look at Raphael before focusing on Chris. "Damn, old dog. I thought we were friends. Don't you tell me anything anymore?"

Somehow, that wasn't quite what Chris had expected to hear. He was at a loss for words.

"I regret it is my fault. Chris and JD might have told you, but I asked them not to," Raphael intercepted.

"Why?"

Chris frowned at Buck. "Raphael has a prize on his head. He can't risk more folks knowin' about him being around than absolutely necessary."

Buck sighed. "I guess so." With a reproachful look at Chris, he said, "But damn, Chris, you shoulda known you could trust me."

"Sorry, Buck. This was too important for just me to decide." Chris looked at Raphael, and Buck spotted a warmth and tenderness in that look he hadn't seen on Chris' face forever. Literally.

"My apologies also, Senor Wilmington." Raphael moved his cheroot to the other hand and reached out his right.

Buck shook it. "It's Buck."

"I am sorry, Buck."

Buck still looked a bit overwhelmed by too much information. But his mind was ticking over, trying to figure out the details. "Ya know, come to think of it...." he started, a hesitant smile turning into a full-blown grin. "I had a funny feelin' there was somethin' going on between you two back then. Guess I never really gave it much thought, havin' been kinda busy myself with that Paulo fella."

"I hope you will not hold that against me," Raphael said quite seriously.

"Hell no!" Buck declared good-naturedly. "Ain't your fault the guy was as looney as a rattler in a pool o' mud."

JD chuckled.

Buck turned. "As for you." He frowned at JD. "Who'd have thought you'd be able to keep your mouth shut all that time."

"Buck!" JD protested, but was instantly pacified by the broad grin appearing on his friend's face.

"Alright. Now that's all straightened out..." Chris said. "What do we do about the others?" He looked at Raphael.

"As soon as we know what we are doing, we can tell them," Raphael suggested. "There is much we need to discuss."

"You're right." Chris reached across the table and squeezed Raphael's hand. He looked at Buck. "Not a word to anyone yet."

Buck nodded. "You can trust me, Chris." He stood. "Is there anything you need? I can bring out whatever you want."

"Thanks, Buck. I think we're okay for a few more days. Just keep everyone away from here, that's all I ask for now."

Buck grinned. "Sure thing, old dog." He turned to leave, looking at JD and willing the pain in his chest to go away. "You stayin' here, kid?"

JD nodded. "I'll probably come back to town later tonight. Don't wanna make it too obvious."

"Alright." Buck put on his hat and was about to leave when he turned once more. "About your horse, Raphael..."

"Si?"

"You might wanna look into sellin' it or something. Folks might recognize it. Ya never know."

Raphael smiled mysteriously. "Gracias. But it's a new one already."

Buck nodded. "Right."

"Buck, how did you know about me and JD?" Chris asked.

"I'd best be headed back to town. See you fellas in a few days." Buck tipped his hat and left hurriedly, punching JD's shoulder playfully on his way out.

JD's moan of protest changed to laughter once Buck was gone.

"I thought that went okay," Chris stated.

JD agreed. "Didn't think Buck would be so understanding. With him being so fond of the ladies and all..."

Chris grinned, but Raphael laughed out loud. "Still an angel after all!"

+ + + + + + +

When JD left that evening to go back to Four Corners - at least for a day or two - he found that there really wasn't anywhere he wanted to be as much as with Chris and Raphael. But he had to go back. If he kept staying there, someone else besides Buck would come out to the shack.

Buck... he reckoned him and Buck would have to put their heads together to work out how not let the others find anything out. At least not yet.

Also, JD had a suspicion that Raphael was just about recovered, and he wanted to give them some time alone. And while both Chris and Raphael wanted him to stay, but they all knew it would be safer if he didn't.

"Don't be gone long, JD" Chris said, and JD nodded, wrapping his arms around Chris' waist and kissing him deeply.

"Like I could..." JD said with more humor in his voice than he felt.

Raphael stood by their side and as soon as Chris let go of JD, he drew him close. "We'll miss you, amado." he murmured, his face against JD's hair and his lips pressed against his temple.

Chris grinned. "Regards to Buck."

JD nodded and smiled. Then he walked outside and went to get his horse from the corral. He also took a look at Raphael's horse - yes, Tranquilo was still chestnut brown. His plan had worked. Turning back to wave to the two men standing on the porch, he hurried his horse back towards town.

+ + + + + + +

Raphael slung his arm around Chris' shoulder and led him back inside. "I have to talk to you, querido."

Chris frowned. "Sounds serious. You okay?"

"It is about JD."

They went and got comfortable on their bed and Raphael told Chris about JD's dream.

Chris nodded. "Is he worried?"

"Si. He was very upset," Raphael admitted.

"What do you make of it?" Chris asked, feeling distinctly uneasy himself.

"I think we must be very careful."

Chris nodded. "Especially about JD. If anything happens, we can't let him get caught up in it."

"Certainly not," Raphael agreed. Then... "Buck... he loves him too."

"Sure does. I think he did from day one." Chris grinned. "He'd take care of him. He might never tell him otherwise, but if it came to... that... he'd be right there by his side."

Raphael pinched the bridge of his nose, thinking hard. "It would be safest for JD if we left."

"Yeah, but..."

"I know. It would break his heart and ours too." Raphael sighed. "It seems that our problems are not solved by my return."

"Hey..." Chris drew him close. "Don't you dare say that. I was dyin' without you. We'll think of a way."

Raphael nodded. "I have never felt as empty as I did while we were apart, Chris. I would go through hell to be with you, and I believe I have." Raphael lay on his back and drew Chris down, closing his eyes when their mouths met and Chris' tongue slowly pushed through his lips.

His hands in Raphael's hair, Chris kissed him so desperately that he was afraid to crush him. But he was only drawn further into Raphael because his lover held him so tight. He could feel his arms around him, clutching at him, and he knew that neither of them would be able to wait another night.

Chris drew back with a gasp. "I need you. I need you now..."

Raphael was breathing heavily and his pupils were dilated. "Si... querido... now!"

He watched Chris unbutton his undershirt and throw it to the floor beside the bed. Reaching up, Raphael traced the lean ribs, running his warm hands around Chris' flanks and drawing him down to kiss the center of his bare chest. "I can feel your heart... and I can hear it..." he whispered, letting his mouth travel upwards to the exposed length of Chris' throat.

Trembling, Chris allowed the caress for a moment before beginning to unbutton Raphael's shirt. He mirrored Raphael's hand on his own chest with slow strokes of the smooth bronze skin, remembering each muscle and each curve of the body beneath him. He bent down to kiss the area around Raphael's collarbone, lingering in the valley at the base of his throat to remember his taste as well.

Raphael moaned, his head pressed back into the bed as he offered up that vulnerable area of his body. With his hands on Chris' hips, he directed his lover into a position where he wouldn't press down on his leg wound but where he could feel the entire length of Chris' lean form against his own. His thigh between Chris' legs, Raphael moved in a sensual glide, rubbing himself against the firm bulge pressing down on him.

Groaning, Chris kissed Raphael again, his tongue parting the sculpted lips and exploring the warm, wet cavern and the very faint tobacco taste within.

Raphael's hands were on Chris' back, stroking down and to his buttocks while he raised himself up against him.

Chris felt the familiar heat and pressure of his aroused lover, and the sudden knowledge that he could once again have him, right now, nearly burst his heart. He shifted to support himself on one elbow to free his hand and moved it in between them, cupping Raphael's hardness through his clothing and beginning a firm stroke which grew ever more insistent.

Raphael's legs parted further, his hands finding their way to Chris' waist to undo his jeans. He slid them down the narrow, thrusting hips, wishing he was more mobile and wouldn't have to take care with his wound.

But Chris never once leant too heavily on him or hurt him in any way, even while their eager caresses grew more and more frantic. He moved lower, kissing his way down Raphael's silky chest and to his waistband. He undid the closure of his pants and pulled them down slowly, taking great care not to get them caught on the bandage. Once he'd removed them, he looked up, moving so his face was level with Raphael's groin. Then he closed his eyes and inhaled deeply. "God, how I missed your scent, Raphael..."

A little growl escaped Raphael's lips and he reached for Chris' face, caressing his cheek and running his palm around to the back of his head where he rested it against his lover's nape.

Chris moved forward, kissing the firm plane of Raphael's belly once before nuzzling against his inner thighs, one side at a time. He licked and kissed the warm, musky skin, feeling every tremor of the bunching muscles against the tip of his tongue and the soft skin of his lips. He held his lover pressed down with his hands on his hips, his own need buried in the dampening sheets until he would be able to sink himself into Raphael.

The thought alone nearly undid him, and he concentrated on his lover's pleasure exclusively, licking ever closer to the silky, solid heat tempting him so unbearably. He looked up at Raphael, smiling when he saw the dark eyes close and lips parted in anticipation, and he flicked out his tongue, running it slowly up the entire length, pressing against it when he felt its involuntary throbbing.

Then, Chris maneuvered Raphael's cock into his mouth, his lips closing around him tightly before sliding down. His own moan of pleasure at the feel and taste of his lover was drowned out by Raphael's harshly groaned, "Finalmente..."

Raphael's hands were now both in Chris' hair, but not directing him in any way.

He knew Raphael's pleasure as well as his own, and he gave all he had to coax sounds of delight from his lover.

Raphael bit his lips, pushing into Chris' mouth as far as he dared while being pulled in further than he himself would have deemed safe.

But Chris was insatiable. He had waited so long for this moment, endured so much for it.

He *needed* its intensity, wanted it to consume them both. He'd missed Raphael's taste when he was so close... the pearly saltiness on the tip of his tongue... the sweet aftertaste when he swallowed.

He sucked harder, incapable of waiting another moment, and was rewarded with the first spasm and a stream of Raphael's hot, spicy essence against the back of his throat. Swallowing hard, Chris demanded more by speeding up the strokes of his mouth, capturing the solid steel tighter between his lips and in his palm and draining it.

Raphael groaned harshly, his fingertips pressing into Chris' skull and his body jerking violently as he lavished his lover's tongue and mouth, aware that the intensity of his climax was making it impossible for Chris to swallow it all, and with glazed eyes, he looked down to watch the thin trickle of his excess sliding from Chris' sensual lips, only to be captured immediately by his tongue.

"I ain't wastin' any of this," Chris said roughly. He pushed himself up and lowered his body down on Raphael's, holding him in his gaze for a moment before kissing him deeply.

It seemed impossible, but Raphael could have sworn he was growing hard again already when he felt Chris erection press against his own softened flesh. He shifted slightly, feeling the contrast of hot steel against warm velvet, the wetness of saliva mingled with that of their seed. A sigh escaped him, and he clutched Chris close, extending the kiss until they had to part so they could breathe.

"I missed you so much..." Chris whispered against the corner of Raphael's mouth. He flicked out his tongue, teasing the full lips apart and tracing them.

Raphael breathed in Chris' words, absorbing them. "I love you," he said. "More than anything. More than life."

With a slight nod, Chris raised himself up to look into Raphael's eyes... dark gems nearly black with desire yet soft with emotion. Fine beads of sweat were trickling down Raphael's temples and past the strong jaw... "You *are* my life," he said solemnly, stroking back the thick, damp hair above Raphael's ear and leaning close to it. "And I'm yours."

"Si, mi amor." Raphael turned his face, smiling happily, and captured Chris' mouth with his own.

When he drew back, Chris said roughly, "I want to be inside you so bad, angelo, but I don't wanna hurt you."

Raphael's nostrils flared as he drew in a deep breath. He thought hard, then his lips curved into a sensual smile as he moved to turn on his side, his back towards Chris and his injured leg drawn up against his body. He heard the low groan from Chris as his lover moved up against him. Feeling the hard little nubs of flesh pressing into his back and the heat of Chris' erection against his buttocks, he shifted to slide back against him, inviting him.

Chris licked his fingers and moved them down, rubbing them against the small opening to Raphael's body, teasing and light at first and then adding pressure until they slipped into him slowly. He let himself be guided by the sound of Raphael's breathing, pressing deeper into the soft narrow cave until he reached his lover's center and coaxed a rumbling groan from him. "Oh yeah... that's what I've been wanting to hear..." Chris said, his voice thick with need.

"Querido, please..."

Chris removed his fingers reluctantly and stroked his hand up over the curve of Raphael's hip, tracing the firm, muscled flesh across one cheek and back down into the crevice he was longing to plunge into.

He resisted, instead reaching behind himself for the small container he kept there. He coated himself quickly and then, more slowly, rubbed the smooth cream into Raphael's body, answering his lover's low moans with tender kisses on his nape and between his shoulder blades.

Raphael closed his eyes, reaching back and finding Chris' hand.

Together, they guided Chris' erection between Raphael's cheeks, until Chris withdrew their hands and rested them on Raphael's hip while he pushed inside his lover's body.

Pressing back against Chris, Raphael groaned, his fingers clenching around Chris' as he felt the first long, slow strokes inside him. He fell into a rhythm with Chris immediately as if not a single day had passed since the last time they'd been so completely connected.

Chris began to move faster, the tight heat drawing him in and the flexing of the muscles in Raphael's back mesmerizing him. He kept staring at them, his thigh lifting Raphael's leg gently to keep his wound safe even while his thrusts grew more torrid and wild. "I never forgot..." he groaned. "What it's like... to fuck an angel."

Raphael's softly melodic laugh, punctuated by deep, gasping breaths, was like a drug to Chris, driving him to move deeper and faster until sweat poured down his face and trickled between their bodies sliding together in perfect sync.

When Raphael was close, his heart pounding and his cock throbbing with his impending release, Chris knew instinctively, reaching around him to pump him hard while his mouth fastened on the temptingly curved neck.

Raphael's head turned back and his eyes met Chris' while they both drew closer and closer. The fire burning in their veins was apparent in the look they exchanged, and when Chris kissed Raphael, his tongue thrusting into his lover as fiercely as his cock, they both came long and hard, drowning together in the sensation and clutching at each other for survival.

They stayed connected as long as possible, but finally, the need to lie face to face became too much and Chris turned Raphael in his arms and drew him close. They lay together, their sweat-slicked skin touching and their eyes locked.

Raphael smiled slowly. "There is nothing in the world like being with you, querido."

Stroking Raphael's cheek with a tenderness he only allowed himself with him and JD, Chris nodded. "I can't begin to describe how you make me feel, angelo. I hope that 'I love you' goes some way towards it..."

He watched Raphael's smile broaden and kissed him, knowing he understood. They held each other close, concentrating on the beating of their hearts as they fell into an identical rhythm and lulled them to sleep.

+ + + + + + +

Chris dipped a cloth into the boiled water and dabbed it carefully on Raphael's well-healed leg wound. "Does that still hurt?" he asked softly.

"No, mi amor." Raphael had watched Chris remove the bandage, and now he was watching his lover as he soothed the scar with hot compresses. It felt good.

JD, who was sitting at Raphael's side, held out the tub of salve he'd 'appropriated' from Nathan's room, and Chris took it gratefully.

"Smart thinkin', JD," he praised, proceeding to carefully massage the cream into Raphael's thigh.

"Nathan used that stuff on me when I had that stab wound, remember, Chris? He said it was some herbal thing Josiah got for him from that Indian reservation nearby. It's made from something called... uh, yerbal bu... bu..." JD scratched his head.

"Yerba buena," Raphael offered.

"Yeah, that's it!" JD smiled, his eyes meeting Raphael's. "What is it?"

"It means 'good herb'. Many of the Indian tribes have used it for a long time to heal snakebites and other wounds." Raphael smiled at JD. "Gracias, amado. "

While Chris was applying the salve, Raphael closed his eyes, enjoying the warm tingle when it penetrated deeply into his skin. "Your friend will not miss it?" he asked of JD.

"I doubt it. He's got half a dozen tubs of it." JD leant back with a sigh. "Ya know, me and Buck have been talkin'. He figures you'd be safer if the fellas knew about you bein' here. We could keep someone on watch out here all the time."

Chris nodded and looked at Raphael. "What do you think?"

"I suppose it would be sensible. But I can not hide forever." Raphael frowned. "I wonder..."

"Yeah?" Chris set aside the salve and massaged the last remnants of it into Raphael's skin.

"I was careful when I came here, but I wish I knew if anyone could possibly have followed me."

Chris didn't like that idea at all. "S'pose they'd be here by now, but..." An unsettling thought came to him. "You were bleeding pretty bad."

"Shit!" JD exclaimed, realizing the implications.

Raphael shook his head. "I kept my wounds tightly wrapped. And they would be here by now if they had followed a trail."

"Still, I don't like not knowin'..." Chris briefly checked the scar on Raphael's arm; it didn't need further treatment. "Gotta admit though that the garbage livin' in Purgatory wouldn't waste any time goin' after a bounty." He frowned, his eyes meeting Raphael's. "So I guess you're right."

JD had an idea. "What if one of the guys were to head on over there? Ya know, hang around for a bit, listen to what's been goin' on..."

"Might be an idea." Chris considered that option.

But JD already eagerly volunteered. "I'll do it."

"No!" Chris and Raphael said simultaneously.

Raphael shook his head. "I do not want you endangering yourself for my sake, JD. For that matter..." His eyebrows drew together in concentration. "I cannot ask any of your friends to do so either."

"I'll go," Chris stated.

"No!" Raphael and JD agreed this time.

Chris smiled. "I've been down there a few times. Me goin' back ain't gonna make anyone suspicious. If anything, my not showin' up for a while might."

Raphael reached out to cup Chris' face. "I could not bear for you to leave me."

"It's only half a day's ride. I'd be back by night time."

JD bit his lips, his youthful features tight with worry.

Chris turned to him. "And you'll stay with Raphael, alright?"

JD nodded, exchanging a look with the Mexican whose expressive face did not veil his fear. "Chris, please be careful. You know we need you!"

Chris leaned forward and, with his hands sliding into Raphael's hair, drew him forward for a warm, lingering kiss, followed by a whispered, "I'll be back in no time at all, angelo."

Not one to waste time once a decision had been made, Chris strapped on his gunbelt and reloaded his gun before reaching for the poncho slung over a chair-back. "I'll see you two later. And no worrying about me!" He smiled the way he only ever did when looking at his two loves - warm and sweet.

They nodded, accompanying him to the door and watching as he mounted his horse and rode it up to the porch. "JD!" Chris called out, and with a smile, he told him, "Raphael's alright now, ya know. All healed up."

Raphael's warm low laugh rang in his ears as he turned his horse. Even without looking back - something he couldn't bear even if he'd only be gone for a few hours - he knew that JD was blushing.

+ + + + + + +

Sighing almost simultaneously, Raphael and JD turned to face each other once Chris was out of sight.

"Do not worry, amante. He will be alright." Raphael came closer and drew JD into his arms.

"I know. Just can't help feelin' scared, that's all." Closing his eyes, JD rubbed his face against the Mexican's neck, letting himself be comforted by the steady pulse.

Raphael knew why, of course. That dream was preying on JD's mind, even if they had not mentioned it again. And it had affected Chris too, like a huge shadow blanket descending over them all. It was merely a dream, he told himself. Not all dreams came true.

The moment JD raised his face to him, Raphael knew his young lover had felt his growing restlessness. He touched a pale cheek, his thumb playfully tapping the small nose. When JD smiled at him, he winked. "We should take a look at Tranquilo."

JD nodded, and with Raphael's arm around his shoulder, he let himself be guided over to the corral.

The proud stallion was still a deep chestnut brown.

"I wonder if the color will wash off in the rain," Raphael said half-jokingly, rubbing the horse's flanks lightly and inspecting his palm afterwards.

"Let's try," JD suggested, and before Raphael had the chance to respond, JD had picked up the water bucket along the edge of the fence and splashed Tranquilo's back with it generously.

The horse nayed, not so much in shock - the water was quite warm from the morning sun - as in pleasure at the welcome refreshment.

Raphael smiled, petting Tranquilo's neck and head. "Bien, amigo. Bien."

JD drew his hand over the horse's back and checked it the way Raphael had checked his hand before. He frowned, unsure of the result, so he rubbed his white shirt-sleeve down Tranquilo's side, much to the Mexican's amusement.

"Didn't come off," JD declared, holding up his arm triumphantly.

Laughing softly, Raphael reached for the wet sleeve and began to roll it up for JD, but the youth drew away, grinning mischievously. "It's kinda hot anyway," he said with a twinkle in his eyes, and began to unbutton his loose white shirt, his gaze never straying from the Mexican's face.

Raphael watched with a smirk, but his heart was pounding heavily against his ribs. His eyes followed the pale fingers as they slowly revealed more and more of the smooth flesh to the soothingly warm late morning sun. He watched as a few of the long, dark tresses of JD's hair were caught behind the collar of the shirt which now hung unevenly off the broad shoulders.

Stepping forward, Raphael reached for that collar and drew it away from JD's neck. "That must tickle, mi amante," he said with a smile.

JD grinned back, allowing the smooth hands to continue teasing the shirt off his shoulders before grasping his bare skin. He raised his face, cocking his head slightly and parting his lips in an open invitation.

"Tentador!" Raphael growled as he leaned down to kiss JD, his palms massaging the bare shoulders while his mouth plundered that unbelievably sweet gift revealing itself to him, opening up, letting him explore... just like so long ago.

When JD was free to speak again, he gasped, "What did you call me?"

"A temptation..." Raphael traced the quivering lips with his index finger, parting them lightly while licking his own.

JD's eyes followed the movement of Raphael's tongue longingly. He rushed forward, pressing against the taller man and demanding another kiss by drawing his head down and crushing their lips together hungrily.

Their tongues played with each other, teasing and reaching everywhere to taste sweet breath, tobacco and the subtle flavor of the morning's coffee.

Feeling JD rub against him, Raphael made a sound low in his throat as his need grew more insistent. Not breaking from the kiss, he slowly backed JD against the corral fence where he spread his lover's arms.

Following the Mexican's lead, JD closed his fingers around the smooth panels of wood behind him, his shirt still dangling off his arms. His shoulders and chest were bare, however, and the warmth of the sun combined with the rough grazing touch of Raphael's dark shirt against him caused him to shiver and the nubs of flesh to draw up tight, longing for more direct stimulation.

Raphael's hands were on JD's so his arms were spread to the sides as well as he pushed his groin against his young lover, shuddering at the moan and tremor the brief movement caused.

Sliding his lips down from the soft mouth over JD's chin, Raphael made his way to the quick pulse at the base of that pale throat. He lingered there for a moment before going down on one knee, his hands now sliding along JD's arms until they were back at his shoulders. They continued traveling downwards, moving beneath the shirt fluttering in the light breeze. And moving all the way around to JD's back and forward again, they came to rest on his sides while Raphael leant forward and kissed the center of JD's chest, nuzzling the creamy flesh before licking his way first to one of the tender pink nubs, then to the other, tonguing each in turn and giving them a brief tug with his teeth when he felt JD become too sensitive.

Yelping when the wet, ticklish sensation changed to a sharp nip, JD shuddered, his knees damn near giving in.

But Raphael's body held him firmly in place, pressed back against the fence, exposed to the Mexican's lips, teeth and tongue. And to the hands now running smoothly down his front and to the waist of his pants.

JD's breathing grew more rapid when the rough cotton was replaced by warm skin, inch by agonizing inch. With his head leaning back over the horizontal plank behind, JD was gasping for breath when he felt himself briefly exposed to the soft breeze. He shivered despite the warmth, wishing himself covered up again, but this time by that hot, experienced mouth he felt only a few kisses away from where he needed it, nuzzling his inner thigh.

"Mi chiquito dulce..." Raphael murmured, his eyes moving up the half-naked body to gaze into the wide brown eyes now looking down at him. "You are so sweet," he said, licking his lips. The passionate look in his eyes leaving no doubt that he was about to make sure.

"Taste me, Raphael..." JD pleaded, just so there'd be no misunderstandings. When he received a nod for an answer, he smiled. And a moment later, he moaned when the most beautiful lips he'd ever known closed around him, nipping gently at the tip of his erection before sliding down towards the base while both of Raphael's hands fastened on his buttocks and drew him forward, squeezing the warm flesh together and then drawing it apart in a promise of pleasures yet to come.

JD chewed on his lip, lost in the wet heat of that mouth as it played him like a beautiful instrument, absorbing each sweet note the moment it was played. Then he felt the hands on his buttocks shift. One moved to the cleft between them, the other moved forward where it began to fondle the full, firm orbs between his legs.

Whimpering, JD pushed into the touch, only to feel Raphael's mouth sliding off him slowly. "No!" he pleaded with desperation in his voice. But when he felt Raphael's free hand close around him, squeezing lightly while the Mexican stood and kicked JD's discarded pants to one side, he broke into a smile which was returned together with a wink.

Reluctantly taking his hands off JD, Raphael undid his gunbelt, hanging it on the fence closeby. Then he began to slowly tease the boy the way he'd been teased earlier, unbuttoning his pants and taking his time sliding down the zip, in spite of his urgent need.
The effect wasn't lost on JD, who followed every movement of the long, bronze fingers as they teasingly tracked the interlocked metal downwards before moving inside the narrow gap created in the front of the black jeans. He could almost feel the touch on his own bare flesh when Raphael began to stroke himself, working his jeans down over his hips slowly with his other hand.

JD had begun to push his groin forward rhythmically without even being conscious of it. The movement was inviting and so sensuous...

Raphael's eyes fixed on the solid arousal stretching towards him while he pushed his jeans and underwear down just far enough. Stepping forward, he reached around the back of JD's neck and leant in for a kiss while his free hand closed around the pale cock crushed between their bodies, gathering all the sticky moisture it had yielded and adding his own before reaching between JD's legs and rubbing their mingled cream into his tight opening.

JD's knees did give this time, but again he was held up by Raphael's body pressing him back against the support of the fence, as well as by one arm quickly moving around his middle and holding him close. His skin tingled from the rough cotton brushing against it and as much as the sensation made him shiver with pleasure, he wanted to feel Raphael's bare skin even more desperately. "Please..." he whispered, instantly understood when his eyes moved up and down Raphael's chest.

"Si, amante." Raphael stepped back, breaking contact for seconds which seemed like hours to pull his loose shirt impatiently over his head and drop it to the ground. Then he watched JD as his glazed eyes moved up and down his chest, adoring the bronze, gleaming skin with his eyes. He could tell JD wanted to taste him, too, when he saw the pink tongue snake out to moisten those sweet lips. But that was for later...

"I've missed you so," JD murmured, his voice breaking under the weight of his emotions as he reached out to Raphael, flinging his arms around the Mexican's neck.

While they kissed - hot and sweet and deep - Raphael slowly removed those arms by the wrists, positioning them back on the fence behind JD. He whispered against a moist pair of lips, "Hold tight, mi amor."

JD obeyed, his fingers clenching around the horizontal wooden bars despite the tremors running through his limbs. "Si," he answered with a sweet smile.

Raphael was lost in JD's eyes for a moment, looking up at him so trustingly. So open. He had never known anyone so devoid of deceit and dishonesty. The lovely young features of JD's face were constantly lit up by the boy's own inner light. "I love you," he said reverently and kissed JD's cheek, feeling the smile against his face.

Then, he moved between the willingly spread bare legs and with his hands behind JD's knees, lifted them off the ground and wrapped them around his waist, gently moving forward until he felt JD's inviting opening with the tip of his cock. Closing his eyes, Raphael felt his partially flaccid erection come back to life in an instant. When he dared look at JD again, he found his lips parted in a silent gasp and a look of concentration furrowing his brow. And he pushed himself in.

Clutching the fence behind with a death grip, JD let out a harsh groan when he felt Raphael slide inside him, filling his body as much as he filled his heart. "Oh yes..." he whispered breathlessly, crossing his calves behind Raphael's back for a better angle and to get closer.

Raphael's hands moved up the back of JD's thighs as he entered him more deeply, fiercely in control of his passion so he would not cause pain to his beloved. And it was so hard not to lose himself in the tight heat and let all his pent-up desire stream into JD immediately. He bit his lip, letting the pain help him disperse his need, even if only for an instant.

JD felt Raphael moving inside him, slowly at first, with careful, gentle strokes. He relaxed, making it easier for his lover to glide into him faster. Faster and harder. Ever harder. Until each single stroke touched his pleasure spot. Until he felt the strokes grow smoother and wetter, easy and wild as their passions flared and expanded into a bright, hot moment of pure ecstasy.

JD's nails were digging into the wood as he tried to hold on, but his palms were sweating with the effort to make it last. Sweating... his eyes fixed on Raphael's chest, continually pounding against his own. Bare, gleaming flesh, trickles of sweat gliding down the center of his chest, slickening JD's skin with the contact, repeated over and over. He felt Raphael's hands shift on the back of his thighs, grasping him almost painfully tight as he held him up. But JD didn't care about pain when there was so much pleasure. So much love.

Sobbing with the impending loss of that blissful, perfect moment, he finally couldn't hold back anymore. His cock, crushed between their sweat-slick bodies, twitched once before raining salty-sweet milk on Raphael's stomach and chest, as well as JD's own.

And the moment he cried out his release, Raphael followed him, managing one last, torturously wonderful stroke deep into his lover before he filled him up with a long, hot stream, too much to stay inside the receptive body wrapped around him. As he slipped out, he felt warm liquid trickle down the back of JD's thighs and beneath his palms, causing him to lose his tight grip.

JD let go off the fence and threw his arms around Raphael's neck, riding out the last moment of pleasure. Just in time before they both lost their balance and crashed into the fence which was already weakened by the continuous pounding to which they had subjected it.

A couple of loud snaps and a moment later, they were both lying in the grass, Raphael on top of JD and both of them on top of the broken fence posts.

They burst into laughter, imagining how ridiculous they must look like that.

Tranquilo, from his position nearby, agreed with a grouchy snort, turning his head away from the human bundle on the ground in disgust. After what he'd already had to witness, it was all simply too much for him...

+ + + + + + +

Chris' ride to Purgatory was uneventful. Just the way he wanted it. He followed the exact route Raphael had told him he'd taken. He was looking sharply, ready to pick out anything along the way that might give him a clue as to whether or not anyone had followed his lover.

He figured Vin might be more apt at a job like that, but Raphael had been right - they shouldn't involve anyone else more than absolutely necessary. So Chris continued to ride and observe, ride and observe. There was nothing to suggest that anyone at all besides Raphael had come this way for at least a week. For that matter, there was also nothing about Raphael's trail that would make anyone suspicious.

He reached Purgatory not long after midday, and as per usual, his first stop was the Cantina. He ordered his usual brand of whiskey, smoked a cheroot and let his eyes wander over the other patrons with trained disinterest. All as per usual.

"Señor Chris?" a familiar voice came from behind him as he was about to light up his second cheroot.

"Maria..."

His unofficial ally in Purgatory smiled up at him, her dark eyes sparkling and a flush of excited anticipation causing her pretty face to glow. However, Maria knew Chris as well as any of his friends, and she knew the instant their eyes met that he was not here for business. Not her kind, anyway.

"Is everything well, Señor Chris?" she asked with concern and some disappointment.

"Now that you're here... just fine," Chris said, loudly enough for those closest to him to overhear. "I missed ya. Come on, let's go."

Maria nodded, smiling as Chris paid for the whole bottle and, picking it up by its neck, threw an arm around Maria's shoulder and drew her away from the bar and through the swing doors.

She didn't question him on the way to her little adobe at the end of town, instead playing along with his cheerful public displays of affection.

As soon as they were inside and out of sight of the town's vermin, Chris set down the whiskey and peered out the small window facing the main street.

"What is the matter, Chris?" Maria asked anxiously. She'd seen Chris in just about any mood he was capable of, but whatever had brought him here today was different. "Are you being followed?" she guessed.

"No, not me." Chris continued to stare outside to be sure no one had followed them, but apparently, none of the town drunks were the wiser. Good. Last thing he needed was to make anyone suspicious.

He turned and found Maria looking at him with concern. "Has anything strange been goin' on here lately?" he asked.

"Strange?" She was confused.

"Yeah." He was testing her, making sure he could still depend on her loyalty.

"A few days ago..." she began, frowning at Chris' stern expression. "A Mexican gentleman - you know, not like everyone else here, but a true caballero - came into town." She was a little confused by Chris' smirk, but continued. "He... helped me. A drunk tried to touch me. Without paying. And this caballero... he hit him."

Yeah, that would have been Raphael alright. Chris grinned. "What happened then?"

"Someone recognized this man, I think. He said something about a reward? The caballero struck at the drunk once more. Then he mounted his horse and rode away quickly."

"Was he followed?" Chris asked.

"Si. They chased him to the edge of town, shooting at him. I think he was shot pretty bad, but when they rode after him, they could not find him." She sighed. "They thought he was dead, but he must have got away."

Chris nodded. "He did."

"You know this man?" Maria smiled. "Is he alright?"

Chris nodded. "Maria, you must promise me something."

"Si, hermoso." She touched his arm. "Anything."

"You can't tell anyone that I asked you about him. If you do, both he and I will be dead."

Maria looked horrified. "I promise!"

"Good." He took another look out the window.

Maria had never seen Chris get this upset about anything other than the family he had lost. And even that only happened when he was very, very drunk. "He is your friend?"

He turned. "Yeah." With a smile he added, "The best kind."

Maria sighed in sympathy.

"Has anyone else asked about him? That's real important, Maria."

Maria thought about it carefully. "No. The bandidos who shot your friend have talked of him and how they missed out on the reward, but no strangers have come to Purgatorio since."

"That's good." Chris rubbed his knuckles over his forehead and sat down.

"You look very tired, hermoso. Can I do anything to help you with that?" Maria offered hopefully.

"No, Maria. That ain't why I'm here and I gotta get back home."

Nodding, disappointment shaping her lush lips into a pout, Maria ran a hand over Chris' stubbled cheek. "What do you want me to do if I hear or see anything?"

Chris looked up. "Nothing. Don't do anything. It's too dangerous."

Deciding that this was one promise she could not keep, Maria said, "As you wish, Chris."

Chris stood and pulled out a few bank notes, which he handed to her. "Gracias, Maria."

"De nada." She considered not taking the money, but life was hard in Purgatorio. So she sighed and tucked the scrunched up notes into the front of her blouse. "When will I see you again?" she asked.

"Not sure."

She nodded, the distant look on Chris' face telling her exactly when. "I see," she said sadly. Then she stood on tiptoes and gave Chris a quick kiss.

He smiled and went to leave. Before he reached the door, Maria called after him, "Be careful, hermoso. Both you and your amigo."

Chris nodded. "Adios, Maria."

"Adios..."

Once the door had shut, Maria sat down with a heavy heart. She could not imagine ever knowing another man like Chris or his gallant friend.

+ + + + + + +

Chris made another round through Purgatory and had another drink at the Cantina. He heard or saw nothing suspicious, so by the time the sun hung a little lower in the sky, he headed home. It was about time, too. He could scarcely believe how much he missed Raphael and JD after just these few hours.

Riding fast enough to get home quickly but not so fast that it would wear on his horse, Chris contemplated what to do about his friends in town.

Raphael had been back for almost a week and he himself would have to show his face there soon enough. Raphael, of course, couldn't. Folks would have forgotten the good he'd done back then - two years ago. But a $1000 reward was something they wouldn't forget.

Chris knew that JD and Buck could let the fellas in on it, but what then? Raphael was living like a prisoner and he'd never even been caught. And Chris knew that he himself would be useless for keepin' the law in town from here on in. He didn't wanna leave his lover's side. He hated just being apart from him for a single day. Any longer than that would tear his heart out.

He could quit his job in town and they could start raising horses. Cattle were out of the question - too many hands needed to take care of 'em.

It all kept coming back to Raphael not being able to live a normal life. Chris didn't give a damn if he himself lived like a hermit; hell, he had done that for years, even when he was stayin' in Four Corners. But he wasn't willing to force a life like that on Raphael.

And then there was the fact that home, so close to Four Corners, was about the damnedest place for Raphael to be. Anyone lookin' for him would wind up there sooner rather than later. They were too close to the border. Too close to drunken scum with nothing but whiskey and dinero on their minds.

If they left, though... if they went north... to Alaska or somewhere high up in the Rockies... they might have a chance at peace in the long run.

What about JD?

Chris knew that deep down - even if JD didn't know it - JD loved Buck as much as the old dog loved him. There was no question that JD would go with them if they only asked. And while part of him would be happy, a small part would always be thinkin' back on Buck. Missing him like hell, probably.

What if they didn't ask? Chris didn't even wanna think about Raphael and himself packing up and riding off in the middle of the night, leaving JD behind. But was there really, truly any other choice? Would it break JD's soft heart? And could they ever live with that, even telling themselves that they'd done the right thing?

So many questions... Chris knew that he couldn't decide on any of this alone. He'd always been the one to make up everyone's mind for them. But Raphael and JD weren't 'everyone'. They were what made his life worthwhile. Without them, he wouldn't have a life. And he wouldn't want one, either.

Oblivious to having spurred his horse on gently, Chris was headed home more quickly than he realized. Home - where aside from questions of life and death, the two most important people in the world were waiting for him to come back. To complete them.

Because any one of the three of them on his own was only part of a whole - lonely, miserable and without spirit.

+ + + + + + +

What Chris saw first when he got home was the broken fence of the corral, and his mind immediately began to race through a dozen terrible things that could have happened while he was gone.

Spurring his horse on in a brutal way that was unlike him, he raced toward the shack, only to halt the neck-braking gallop when he heard soft laughter from the bathing area behind the building.

Chris took a deep breath when he recognized JD's laugh, trying to regain control of his heart which had damn near stopped beating altogether.

"Chris!" JD called out the moment Chris walked around the corner.

Chris grinned. "I shoulda known. And while I've been eatin' dust and riding like the devil was after me!"

JD's smiling face was peering over the edge of the big tub he and Raphael had filled right up with water from the spring. Resting his chin on his hands and his hands on the edge of the tub, JD half-floated on his stomach.

Raphael was lying back in the tub, a lazy, seductive smile inviting Chris to join them. "We missed you, mi amor!" he said, his voice soft and calm now that Chris was safely back and apparently didn't have bad news.

"Hell of a long time to be away from the two of you." The words were heartfelt and Chris realized that he'd been worried sick about them the whole time he'd been gone. "It don't look like there's any trouble heading our way," he said reassuringly. "Didn't see anything to make me think someone was lookin' for ya."

Chris walked up to the side of the tub and knelt, kissing Raphael tenderly before reaching to draw JD back so he could plant a kiss on the tip of his nose.

"I'm sure glad to hear that, Chris!" JD said, his cheerful voice belying the worries he'd had while Chris was gone. His broad shoulders slumped visibly as he relaxed.

Chris fell back on the seat of his pants, crossing his arms over his knees. "So, what's made the two of you rush to have a bath like this? Looks to me like I've been missin' something good."

"A few things, Chris." JD grinned evilly. Then... "Oh hell, we forgot to fix the fence!" he exclaimed, causing a rumble of laughter from Raphael.

Chris chuckled. "That's it, huh?" He shook his head. "Knew I missed somethin'."

Raphael sat upright, entangling his fingers in Chris' dusty hair. "We will make it up to you."

JD grinned. "I think Chris could do with a bath more than you and me, Raphael."

"Whoa!" Chris stood and shifted back a bit, guessing JD's intention. "Not enough room in there for the three of us."

"That's okay," Raphael said lazily. "We were about to get out anyway."

Chris wondered if there was something going on when Raphael and JD stood at the same time to get out of the bath.

JD reached for his arm to steady himself, but the moment Chris realized what was happening, he found Raphael grabbing him too and he wound up in the tub with a splash. He heard the laughter through the water covering his head.

Spluttering and gasping for breath once he'd resurfaced, Chris found himself sprawled fully-dressed in the tub. He stroked back his wet hair and rubbed his eyes. When he looked up, he saw JD already wrapped in a towel, grinning from ear to ear.

Then, both of them looked over at Raphael who stood in the open, quite unashamedly drying himself in the sunlight. He wasn't wearing a stitch of fabric and his muscular arms were stretched out at his sides as he blinked into the setting sun.

"Wish I could paint. I'd paint you like that," Chris said, awestruck.

Raphael turned and smiled at him affectionately.

"What would you call the painting, Chris?" JD asked, similarly breathless.

"Sun God after his Bath," Chris said without hesitation.

Raphael chuckled. "Gracias, mi amor."

"He's right, ya know." JD reached out to run a finger down the sinewy length of Raphael's arm. "You'd make a damn fine picture." He moved in closer and pressed a kiss on Raphael's shoulder, finding himself pulled into an embrace.

Chris groaned. "Alright, I gotta get clean here. You two go inside while I wash off this dust."

Raphael smirked. "We'll be waiting for you."

"You better!" Chris said with a wink and began to struggle with his wet shirt and jeans.

Laughing, Raphael and JD retreated, leaving Chris to have the quickest bath he'd had in his life.

+ + + + + + +

When Chris entered the shack, naked and dripping wet, he called out, "One of you coulda brought me a towel!"

He heard JD's giggle from out back and found himself enfolded in a soft, clean towel immediately.

"Much better," he purred, hating the fact that he couldn't really see Raphael, now that the sun had gone down and the room was basically dark, but happy enough when he felt himself being rubbed dry by those strong hands he'd know anywhere.

Raphael moved around him, sweeping the towel over his hair briefly before drying down his chest, stomach and arms, not lingering anywhere.

A sudden flicker of candlelight in the far corner of the room caught Chris' eyes and he saw JD standing there, his face illuminated softly by the flame of a thick white candle he'd just lit.

JD moved closer, bringing the light with him so Chris could watch as Raphael, now sadly wearing a towel around his hips, knelt in front of him, drying down the length of Chris' legs. Slowly this time.

When the towel was back up by his groin and brushed over Chris' over-sensitized skin, he groaned, shifting to part his legs further.

But mercilessly, Raphael merely chuckled softly, standing again and moving around behind Chris, letting the towel slide gently over the broad back and shoulders and down to Chris' waist where he reached around him and, with the towel now draped around Chris' middle, drew him back against himself.

"Aw hell!" Chris exclaimed, Raphael's erection barely separated from his own body by the thin strip of cloth hanging loosely over his lover's hips.

"I thought I would dry the rest of you with *my* towel," Raphael offered huskily, and he began to rub against Chris' backside, sliding up and down slightly as he massaged Chris' damp skin with the towel he himself was wearing. He pushed one leg up into the space between the slender legs, using it to dry the sensitive area between Chris' inner thighs.

Chris let his head fall back with a low moan, resting it on Raphael's shoulder.

JD set down the candle and stepped up to Chris, pressing himself full-length against him and kissing the base of his neck, before slowly sliding down, his lips tracing the last droplets of water Raphael had missed towards Chris' groin until he was finally kneeling. Without wasting another moment, he gave the tip of Chris' erection a quick lick and drew it into his mouth, countering the expected sudden jerk with his hands on Chris' hips.

Raphael's hands closed over Chris' shoulders briefly before moving forward and down, sliding over his damp chest and catching on hardened tips of flesh as if by accident. He leant in and whispered something in Chris' ear, causing a shudder which nearly caused Chris to slip from JD's mouth.

JD's eyes met Raphael's over Chris' shoulder and there was a sparkle which would normally go with a smile in the deep brown orbs, except JD's lips were busy.

Raphael smiled back and mouthed something which, to JD, looked like 'slowly'.

JD nodded, releasing the velvety treat only reluctantly to move back up, his hand tracing Chris' leg all the way to his groin where he cupped the damp warmth he had only just released. He raised his face towards Chris and offered his mouth which was eagerly taken.

Raphael's hands grasped Chris' upper arms and he drew him back tighter against himself, running his palms all the way down to Chris' hands and back up, lifting Chris' arms up in the process so he could reach around his middle.

When Chris felt Raphael grinding against his backside, he pushed back, wriggling until he felt the towel Raphael was still wearing come loose. With another jostle, he was able to slide it off him without ever using his hands.

Raphael laughed softly, his hands moving backwards until he had a firm grasp of Chris' buttocks. He squeezed briefly before sliding his palms lower, using the pressure to draw the hard-muscled flesh apart. Then, he pushed forward, nestling himself in the warm gap.

Chris growled, his mouth parting from JD's to beg for help, but JD already knew what to do. He reached down again and closed his hand around Chris once more, sliding up and down slowly this time until he felt Chris push forward impatiently.

JD exchanged another glance with Raphael and they both began to move faster. JD's palm spread the silky fluid gathering at the tip of Chris' cock over the entire length, his strokes hard and smooth, while Raphael ground against Chris, his own arousal pressing insistently between the tensing cheeks and muscled thighs.

A harsh cry was wrung from Chris' throat as he came into JD's hand, his spasms sending Raphael over the edge as well.

When Chris felt the warm spurt of his lover's seed against the backs of his thighs, he slumped slightly, only to find himself led to the bedroom by JD and Raphael who exchanged a triumphant grin.

+ + + + + + +

Raphael cleaned Chris a little with one of the damp towels while JD - the only one of them still wearing a towel at all - crawled onto the bed, peeling back the blanket and huddling under it.

"Anyone gonna join me in here?" he asked, pouting.

Raphael was on him in an instant, covering him full-length and kissing him wildly, interrupting only to share a smile with him, while his bare limbs worked the blanket further down, taking JD's towel with it slowly.

Chris sank onto the bed beside them, still rather shaky from their combined 'assault', and watched, lying on his side, as JD's sweet submission worked its magic on Raphael, reviving his arousal so fast that Chris could effectively watch it with every up and down movement of Raphael's groin on JD.

He wasn't surprised to find himself grow hard again soon after - Raphael and JD did that so easily to him. He was unaware of how his own body mimicked the movements of Raphael's atop JD.

Raphael had tugged JD's towel all the way off and flung it to the floor, working his way beneath the blanket with him.

Chris reached out and stroked over JD's hair, smiling at him when the deep brown eyes gazed at him lovingly.

Raphael looked over, too. "Come closer, querido."

Chris did, sliding under the blanket with them and pushing his arm through underneath JD's neck. He drew him against his chest, playing over his sweet face with his lips and the tips of his fingers while Raphael concentrated on the rest of his body, sliding against him, kissing and stroking every inch of his skin he could reach.

JD sighed when Chris' lips tugged at his earlobe, especially when at the same moment, Raphael - hard and so hot against him - touched a very sensitive spot between his legs. Shuddering slightly, JD threw back his head, gasping, and Chris took the opportunity to lick and bite at his neck.

Raphael held JD tight, stilling his trembling against his own warm, solid body.

JD held on tight like that, breathing of Raphael deeply, drawing him in and holding him inside - he'd keep him there forever, a little piece of him.

Chris suddenly realized that tears were streaming down JD's cheeks. "Hey, baby..." he said softly. Then he touched Raphael's shoulder to get his attention.

But Raphael had already noticed. He glanced at Chris, then back at JD. "Amado... please, be still, amado." He kissed the tears away tenderly. "We are here."

JD, even while he felt full of so much love, suddenly sensed a terrible loss. He tried to clutch both Chris and Raphael so very tight, and at the same moment, he felt as though they were slipping from him. "I love you!" he sobbed and cried out to both of them.

Raphael lay down alongside him, gathering him in his arms while Chris closed his own arms over them both from behind JD. All they could do for the time being was hold him and let him cry.

But soon, JD became even more restless, frantically clutching at Raphael, gazing back over his shoulder to make sure Chris was still there.

"Love me. Hold me, please!" he begged, his eyes wild and frantic. "Chris!" He faced Raphael again. "Please, Raphael!"

He was inconsolable, and they both sensed that the only thing that would give him any peace at all was to honor his request.

Chris reached back for a tube of cream he kept on the bedside table, and he prepared JD quickly, lingering inside him with his fingers only long enough to stretch him and open him up. He was still hard, thankfully, and when he slowly pushed inside JD, he grew harder still.

Raphael's hand had moved from JD's waist down to his hip, where he caressed gently until he sensed that Chris had entered JD. Then, he lifted JD's thigh to rest atop his own and took him in his hand.

Stroking him firmly, the way he sensed JD needed it just then, he brought him close to the edge quickly.

Chris pushed into JD with fast, deep movements, all the while kissing his neck and shoulder and the back of his head, and stroking up and down his side, while JD clutched onto Raphael so hard that his fingertips left marks on his skin.

When Raphael sensed that JD was close, he briefly slowed his strokes, finding JD's mouth with his own and kissing him tenderly. "Te amo, amado. Siempre. Always..."

JD sobbed and gasped when he came, struggling to keep breathing until Raphael kissed him again, giving him his own breath.

Chris rode out his own climax slowly and then his arm wrapped around JD and he pulled him close, whispering soothingly against his nape and kissing the sweat-damp dark tendrils of hair curling there.

JD fell into an uneasy sleep moments later, so restless that Raphael and Chris didn't dare loosen their embrace of him.

"Querido..." Raphael said sadly.

Chris rested his own hand over Raphael's where it lay on JD's heaving chest. "I don't know what to do." Chris was close to tears.

"We must leave. Soon."

Chris' eyes met those of his lover. "We can't go without JD."

"No. We can't." Raphael's fingers curled around Chris'. "But if anything happens to him, I will no longer want to live."

Chris nodded. "No. I wouldn't either."

They both thought long and hard about their few options.

"Buck... He loves him. Very much." Raphael mused.

Chris nodded. "Buck adores JD. He would take care of him... make him happy... keep him safe. Losing him would break Buck's heart, too."

Raphael sighed, shifting even closer to JD when he felt the trembling in their young lover's body increase. "We must let JD make his choice, querido."

"Yeah." Chris close his eyes for a moment, swallowing hard to try and dispel the lump in his throat. "Yeah, we got to leave it to JD."

Raphael rose on one elbow and kissed Chris over JD's head. "We should try and sleep. A little."

Chris nodded and they both settled back around JD, holding him in a protective embrace while sleep enfolded them all.

+ + + + + + +

"Un mil dólares por el diablo!"

Drunk and stinking like cattle that's been laying out in the desert for days, a group of bandidos were hatching a plan, and drunk or sober, most of them were as dangerous as they were revolting. Any man, if he could, would choose to steer well clear of them.

They were hunched over a table that was covered in spilt food, cheroot burns and spit. One of them was squinting at something on the table before pointing to the door. "Encima de las colinas!"

"Si." Several of the others agreed, looking expectantly at the elderly patch-eyed Mexican across the table - their boss. One of them added, "Hay un ciudad... patron."

The man with the patch nodded and growled. "Conseguen él!"

"Si, patron!" A couple of bandidos noisily stood and kicked back their chairs before heading through the door of the Cantina.

They mounted their horses and rode on out of Purgatorio, headed for Four Corners.

Left behind was the patch-eyed man, staring down at the table. He picked up the ornate gunbelt stud bearing his family's seal. "Venganza!" he growled, clutching the keepsake he'd given to Raphael years ago so hard that his knuckles stood out white. Then he slammed his fist down on the table hard.

+ + + + + + +

Maria clutched her chest, her breathing uneven and edgy as she stood at the far end of the bar. She had listened to the conversation and she knew exactly what it was about.

With only slightly swaying hips so as not to be suspicious, she made it out of the Cantina without the patch-eyed man noticing her at all. Once outside, she ran to a small hut at the far end of Purgatorio where a friend lived.

"Juanita!" she called out, waving to the woman barely a few years her senior. "Juanita, I need your horse. Please!"

Juanita stopped Maria's frantic movements with her hands on her shoulders. "What is the matter? Why?"

"There is no time to explain. Please, Juanita! There is... I must warn somebody." Maria stood panting, her small hand already reaching for the reins of Juanita's horse.

"Si. Take it. But be careful," Juanita warned.

Maria nodded and mounted the horse, riding off like the wind.

+ + + + + + +

JD woke with a painful stinging under his eyes. His heart was heavy, and he remembered every moment of the previous night. "Raphael? Chris?" he called out frantically when he didn't immediately see them.

"Right here, amado!" Raphael came quickly from the kitchen, sitting down and taking JD in his arms. "Chris is here, too."

JD burrowed against Raphael's neck. "I'm sorry about last night, but..." He swallowed hard and painfully. "Something's wrong."

Raphael felt it too, and so did Chris. There was no use denying it. "Yes, amado. We have to leave."

JD tore himself away. "Not without me!"

Chris came in. "JD..." he started soothingly, but JD's eyes were so wild and fearful, he stopped. "Are you sure?"

JD nodded and said without a moment's hesitation, "Yes."

Both Chris and Raphael had known he would decide this way.

"We'll leave today," Chris decided. "JD, you go get back to town and get your things, then come back here as fast as you can."

JD hesitated. "I don't need my things."

Chris thought about how to put it. "Don't you wanna say goodbye to Buck?"

JD lowered his eyes. "No. I... I think I'd just go ahead and cry, ya know?" He tried to smile, but the thought of leaving Buck behind forever made that impossible.

Raphael sighed. "He will be heart-broken, amado."

"I know." JD looked at Raphael pleadingly. "But I guess you're right. Can't just walk away from him like that."

Raphael squeezed his shoulder encouragingly.

It felt so wrong to be going to town by himself, JD thought. He knew Chris and Raphael couldn't come along with him and he had to go, but damn. He decided he'd just go see Buck and to hell with his things...

"I'm gonna get back fast," he said to them both. "You're not gonna start heading north without me, right?"

Chris smiled. "We gave you the choice and besides, we both want you with us. No, we're not gonna run out on you, baby." He leaned in and kissed JD, drawing him into a tight embrace.

Again, JD got that feeling that everything was happening all wrong. He clutched to Chris like he was about to be torn away from him.

Raphael stroked over his hair and JD moved into his embrace next, holding on for a moment. Raphael could taste the tears on JD's lips when they kissed.

"I'm gonna be back real soon," JD said again. His voice was trembling.

Chris smiled. "Go on. The sooner you go, the sooner you'll be back. Raphael and I are gonna be packing what we need to get started."

JD sighed heavily. "Right." And after another look back and forth between them both, he left for town.

+ + + + + + +

"JD..." Buck was as white as a sheet. "You ain't gonna come back, right?"

JD had just told him that, but he couldn't believe it. Didn't wanna believe it. Damn, but he had no idea how he'd go on without him, even if JD had belonged to Chris and Raphael all along. He'd always been around at least, and Buck had gotten used to making do with that. Just a look from JD once in a while, a smile... the knowledge that JD needed him as a friend at least...

"Buck, I'm sorry." JD swallowed down more tears yet. "I wish..."

Buck looked deeply into JD's eyes, his own having lost all of their blue sparkle underneath the sheen of tears. He didn't know if JD could see his longing in that gaze. Or his love. It was probably better if he couldn't - that way, he wouldn't be feelin' bad about leaving.

"I'm gonna miss you, Buck!" JD finally stammered out, flinging himself at his friend, his arms around Buck's middle and his face staining the blue-checked shirt with his tears.

Buck just wrapped his arms around him, holding him tight. It was all he could do. Anything else would only hurt more. And he was hurtin' as much as he could stand.

Suddenly, JD pulled back. "I gotta leave, Buck. Now."

Buck nodded, blinking a few times to disperse the tears. "You're sure you don't need anything? Money?"

JD shook his head. "There's no time, I..."

At that moment, the door flung open and a young Mexican woman stumbled over the doorstep.

Buck recognized her. "Maria?"

She took a few gasping breaths, clearly in a hurry to speak. "Quickly!" she coughed. "You must help... they... they have come for señor Chris and his friend. Please!"

JD began to tremble. "Who?" he muttered, suddenly feeling stone cold.

"Bounty hunters!" Maria explained. "They left Purgatorio this morning and they... they know where to look. Help them, please!" She sobbed.

Buck settled her into a chair and got her some water. "You okay to stay here?" he asked her, taking charge.

She nodded, wiping her dusty hand across her face.

JD stood in shock. Buck had to tug at him get his attention. "Come on, JD, we have to get the others!"

And JD sprang into action, running past Buck and downstairs, right into Josiah who was the first to get his breathless, stuttering explanation, disrupted by frequent sobs.

Buck was downstairs a moment later, his gun belt around his hip. "Josiah, get the others. Don't waste time explainin'. We gotta get out to Chris' place right *now*!"

"We'll be right behind you," Josiah assured him. He was off to find the rest of the Seven.

JD was already outside, mounting his horse, when Buck got there. Moments later, they were riding out of town and towards Chris' shack as fast as their horses would carry them.

+ + + + + + +

Buck swore when the shack came into view. Or what was left of it.

"No... NO!!" JD gave his horse the spurs and raced across the field, paying no attention to Buck's warnings to be careful, not giving a damn if anyone would shoot him before he made it there.

When he stumbled inside the ruin, he immediately knew that Chris and Raphael weren't there. Their gun belts had gone, but everything they would have taken along to go up north was still there. Packed and ready, but sitting on the kitchen table - bullets, blankets, food, basic tools, water...

Buck was only yards behind JD. "They're gone?"

JD nodded. Then he realized that while Raphael and Chris weren't there, the burned down shack was far from empty. Two Mexicans lay dead on the wooden floor, their blood seeping through in between the boards.

"There's a couple more outside," Buck stated.

JD hadn't even seen them when they got there. "We have to find them."

Buck followed him back outside where JD mounted up again. "Horses are gone. But there's tracks to follow." And he rode off.

Buck did his best to catch up, but they were both hindered by having to frequently stop and check for tracks, which grew fainter as they headed onto more solid ground.

JD's heart sank when he realized where they were headed. He remembered his dream. "The caves, Buck! Over there!" And he hurried his horse onwards, no longer checking for tracks. There was no need.

Another of the Mexicans lay dead no more than a mile from the nearest cave. And then another... a few feet onwards. Both of them had been shot in the head. And then, there were a a couple of guns - Chris' and Raphael's - thrown to the ground when their bullets had run out. They were no longer warm - they'd been fired at least a couple of hours ago.

"Buck!" JD called out. He'd dismounted a little way ahead of Buck, having spotted a thin trail of blood. It led towards the cave. He looked up, and when he saw the cave's collapsed entrance, his heart stopped...

+ + + + + + +

"There's nowhere else we can run to. Nowhere we can hide, Raphael." Chris gasped in as much of the stale air as he could, but not too much. He needed to save enough for Raphael.

"I know." Raphael's lungs were filling with dust. It was replacing more and more of his oxygen without there being any way to fix that.

Chris turned towards him and reached for his hands. He drew him close and they lay down side by side.

"I am tired of running, querido," Raphael confessed, his voice barely audible now. He drew Chris into his arms.

"So am I," Chris admitted. "Lets just..."

"Stop."

With one more shuddering breath, Chris asked, "What... about JD?"

Raphael gasped. "Buck... will take care... of him."

"Yes... He'll be safe..."

Raphael tried for another breath. "I love you, querido."

"And I love you, angelo. More than life. This one... or any other."

They clutched each other tightly as they awaited the inevitable. The air ran out. There simply was none left. Nothing left to breathe. And then... they stopped trying and fell asleep.

+ + + + + + +

"Buck!!" JD called out, running towards the cave. His friend caught up with him quickly, but before they got to the cave entrance, they could already see - even at a fair distance - that it had fallen in.

"NO!!" JD screamed, as all his blood ran cold and turned to ice.

Buck watched JD's face turn a ghostly white and barely managed to get to him before JD lost consciousness.

+ + + + + + +

When JD came to, he began to struggle, hysterically muttering Chris' and Raphael's names, over and over. He pulled away from Buck, trying to clear the cave entrance. It was an impossible feat. Even if they had a whole team of men, they wouldn't be able to clear the cave for hours. And more than likely, they were already too late now.

Buck shuddered when the thought settled in his mind. He suddenly knew, with inescapable clarity, that Chris and Raphael were gone. He'd never really got to know the Mexican, but he knew how deeply Chris and JD loved him - he had to have been a very special guy. And Chris... His eyes filled with tears.

JD stopped what he was doing and stared at him wildly. Yes, he knew too. "Oh God no!!!" JD cried out, pounding on the large boulders blocking the cave. "I need them. They can't be gone. They can't!"

"JD!" Buck drew him away from the rocks, barely managing to keep a grasp of him at all. "Sssssssh... JD... ssshhh...." He enfolded the shivering, crying bundle in his arms and pressed him so close he feared he'd break him. But if he should let him go, he knew that JD would run. And probably never stop running until he got to the edge of a cliff.

"I love them!" JD whimpered. "I love them. I love them."

Buck sat on the ground, drawing JD down with him. "They know that. And they love you too. Always will, JD. And so do I."

JD looked up with tears streaking down his face. "Buck!" He fell against his friend and they sat there like that until it grew dark, with Buck rocking JD gently, stroking over his hair.

The others would reach them soon.

JD, his voice cold and fragile, said, "We need to bury them. Together."

Buck shook his head. "The only way we can leave them together is if we don't get them out of the cave. They're together now."

JD sobbed. "But..."

"Leave them together, JD. They'd want it that way."

JD nodded slowly. He knew Buck was right.

Suddenly, a shooting star lit up the sky, followed closely by another. JD and Buck both stared at them wide-eyed as they seemed to hang still in the Earth's atmosphere.

JD's mouth stood open and when both stars twinkled once in unison right in his direction before continuing on their identical paths towards the center of the universe, he knew exactly what they were.

END