ATF Universe
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The room was quiet except for the sounds of various machines. One man, Ezra Standish, undercover agent for the Denver ATF, was sitting at the bedside of his lover. Vin Tanner, sharpshooter for the Denver ATF, was critically wounded and not expected to live. They had become aware of each other's feelings for one another one year ago. Since that time, they had formed a loving bond unlike anything either man had experienced before.The bust was supposed to be an easy one, something the team normally could have done with their eyes closed. But, something went wrong and here they were holding a vigil over their downed agent. No one could leave his bedside; they wanted to be there for Vin and for Ezra. The others knew that the southerner would not be able to handle losing his partner, not after having just found him.
Buck and JD were sleeping on the floor, Buck sitting up in the corner with JD's head on his lap. Josiah was given the thin pallet that was brought in for Ezra to sleep on. The southerner would not move from his lover's bedside. Nathan, the groups' medic, was lying next to Josiah on the floor. Chris sat where he could observe all of his men, in case he was needed.
Standish's tears fell as he watched his lover fight for his life; he struggled with himself to keep the emotions hidden from view. Ezra wanted to be strong for Vin and crying or losing control would show he was weak. He could remember this time last year when his Texan had told him for the first time, "I love ya, Ez."
That seemed so long ago as he now looked at his lover being kept alive by machines. A bullet had pierced his chest collapsing his right lung three days ago. The surgery had been rough on him and the others; they knew that Vin was fighting for his life. They had lost him several times in the trauma room before they had gotten him ready for the operating room.
The doctors did not hold much hope of the man surviving and were surprised that he had lived this long. Ezra stayed by his side, refusing to give up hope; his Vin would not leave him. He looked around and noticed everyone was asleep, that is, everyone but Chris. Mr. Larabee believed as he did, that Vin would come out of this.
Ezra thought back to one year ago today and smiled. It was the first time in his life he knew without a doubt someone loved HIM. He let the warm memories take over.
Ezra knew he was attracted to one Vin Tanner from the time they had met. He fought that attraction with everything he could think of, but it was a losing battle. Lately, his secret love was acting distant and sad; even making one Chris Larabee worried about he young sharpshooter. Ezra needed to do something special for his secret love for Valentine's Day. He thought to himself that he would not get caught; he was too discreet for something like that to happen.Then it hit him what he could do for Vin. He could be his secret admirer. The plan was perfect, everything was taken care of, and all things were in place. Ezra smiled, knowing he would have a front row seat to watch it all. It would distract Vin from his current worries, even if only for a day.
Ezra came into the office early with the excuse that he was working on a cover assignment. He just wanted to be there when Vin came in to work. It had taken several days to set everything up, and he did not want to miss anything.
The elevator opened and Standish knew without having to look up that Vin was the one coming off the elevator. He never had to look around to see if Vin was around; he felt the man's presence whenever he was near.
The team's sharpshooter walked over to his desk with a smile on his face. The smile touched the man's eyes and made the blue orbs shine like deep sapphires. Ezra noticed the card and candy in Vin's hands and frowned. It was not what he had left for the man; someone else is wooing his secret love. A feeling of jealousy overcame Ezra, causing him to stand and walk to the break room. Vin followed calling his name.
"Hey, Ez! Look what Miss Nettie gave me," Vin smiled as he held out the card and candy.
"How nice, Mr. Tanner, Ezra felt a sudden sense of relief.
Miss Nettie was old enough to be Vin's mother, or grandmother, these days. He knew that she would not be any competition for him on this special day. The only thing wrong with the picture was that Vin would not be showing his gifts to someone saying, "Look what Ezra got me."
"Did ya get anythin' for Valentine's Day?" Vin asked.
"No."
"Ya can share my box of candy. It has one of them chocolate covered cherries ya like," Vin offered.
"Thank you," Ezra said as he took the offered confection.
Tanner smiled and returned to his desk. Standish was about to follow when Buck slipped in he break room and smiled.
"So, did Vin find his present yet?" Buck grinned
"Mr. Tanner? Present?" Ezra looked confused.
"Ez, ole buddy, I watched ya come in early and place the card and gift in his desk." Buck crossed his arms and leaned on the counter.
"Mr. Wilmington…"
"Ezra, the name is Buck. That's the price for my silence." Buck chuckled as he walked out to the break room.
The southerner was shocked into silence, not only was he busted, now he was being blackmailed. He did not know what to do, and he was not (I think that is what you intended here, right?) sure Buck would keep his secret. He would have to talk with the scoundrel further later in the day, but right now he hoped he had not missed Vin finding his presents.
"WOW!" Vin cried.
"What now, Jr?" Buck asked, as he looked over and winked at Ezra.
"Look, I have a secret admirer." Vin grinned, as he held up the spyglass. "I always wanted one of these."
"Well, looks like you have one now." Buck smiled, as he noticed the look on Vin's face, and wagged his eyebrows at Ezra. "Any clue who it could be?"
Ezra glared at the ladies' man and coughed. He did not want Buck spoiling his day. 'I do believe I will have to persuade Buck to be quiet.' Ezra looked back toward the younger man, to watch as Vin carefully examined his gift and then looked at the card again.
"What's the card say, Jr?" Buck asked.
"Just a hallmark signed your secret admirer. Nothin' written in it to give me a clue who to thank." Vin frowned.
"Vin, that's what secret admirer's do. They don't want you to know, it's part of the mystery," Buck laughed.
"I'd still like to know who to thank. You see anybody funny lurkin' around here this mornin'," Vin asked.
"Not me, Jr. Ask Ez here, he was in before me this morning'." Buck offered.
"Ez, ya hear or see anyone strange around here this mornin'?" Vin asked.
"No, Mr. Tanner, I did not," Ezra replied, as he made it look like he was deep into his work on the computer. 'Please do not come over and see the worthless information floating on my screen.'
The southerner thanked Josiah's God that no one had showed up at the office during this time. With Josiah and Nathan having court today they would not be in the office. JD had taken the day off, having made special plans for his lady, Casey. Chris was tied up downtown in a leader's meeting with the Judge. One of the men, if not all of them, would have picked up on Buck's innuendoes and made his life hell.
Ezra kept working on his fake report and research, avoiding contact with Vin. He felt like everything was falling apart and did not want to give anything away. He was not sure how far Buck was going to go with his knowledge, and it made him very uncomfortable. 'Whatever made me think I could pull this off? I must be mad.'
The elevator doors opened with a ping and out came a florist, carrying a colorful western cactus. The deliveryman came into their office and called a name.
"I have a delivery here for Vin Tanner," The man announced to the three men.
"I'm Vin Tanner."
"Here you go, sir. Enjoy." The man smiled as he handed the plant to Vin.
"Candy, card, flowers of sorts, and a spy glass, you made out on this day," Buck smiled, as he again looked over at Ezra.
Throughout the day Vin would look from the cactus to the spyglass and smile softly. The smile touched Ezra's heart and made him the happiest he had ever been. He refused to let thoughts of Vin rejecting the gifts, if he knew whom they were from, enter into his happy thoughts.
Buck had left work a few hours ago, saying he was going to help Chris out of a jam. Seems the ladies' man's talents were needed to persuade a certain female clerk to give Chris a permit to build a new barn on his ranch, something about red tape and Buck's magnetism needed to cut it. With none of the others coming to the office that day, it left Vin and Ezra alone.
Vin had been on the phone several times throughout the day. He asked Ezra to help him with writing his reports, and had asked him what his plans were for that night. The fact that he had none surprised the young man.
"Ya ain't goin' out?" Vin asked.
"No, Mr. Tanner, I am not going out tonight," Ezra replied.
"Why not, don't you have a sweetheart?" Vin asked.
"Mr. Tanner I think my...never mind." Standish blushed as he returned back to his computer screen.
"Well, I gotta go. Goin' ta go over to Miss Nettie's for dinner." Vin smiled as he gathered his gifts and left.
Ezra smiled sadly as the elevator closed, hiding his beloved's face. He would give the man some time before he ventured out of the office. He just wished he knew what it was like to be surprised and loved.
Standish slowly walked to his car, not feeling the need to rush home to his empty, lonely condo. In is 32 years of life he had never felt as alone as he did at this moment in time. He could not help but believe that he'd made the worst mistake in his life, and now Buck knew it.
The drive home was like pulling a tooth at the dentist, slow and painful. The traffic was too easy to maneuver, nothing too intricate to help take his mind off the events of the day. He played Vin's day again and again in his head. The whispered phone calls and smiles as the sharpshooter hung up. Vin's dreamy stares out the window, and the faraway look in his eyes, made Ezra wonder where his thoughts might lay.
Ezra sighed as he pulled into the driveway. He looked at the place he called home and wanted to cry. He was so tired of living alone, with no one that loved him to come home too. Determinedly he shook himself out of his depressed thoughts and walked to the door.
The first thing Ezra noticed as he walked into the condo was the aroma of something that made his mouth water. The second thing he noticed was his usually bare dining table was decorated for entertaining. The red candles burned softly offering the only light in the room. The crystal glasses sparkled in the soft glow.
"Surprise!" a soft whispered voice called out.
"What, I mean how?" Ezra whispered.
There, standing in the kitchen door stood the most beautiful sight Ezra had ever seen. Vin was there smiling at him and holding two glasses of wine. The candlelight enhanced the golden glow of his already tanned skin, golden skin that was more precious to him than all the money in the world.
"Is it that important? I guess it is, for ya." Vin smiled, as he walked toward him, handing him the glass of wine.
"Mr. Tanner, why are you here?" Ezra asked as he took the wine.
Their fingers touched and neither man could let go of the glass. The southerner looked into the eyes of his true love and noticed a softness he had never seen there before. He wondered what the look Vin was giving him was all about. Ezra's mind could not fathom the meaning without opening himself up to the hurt it might bring.
"Ezra…" Vin whispered, as he leaned forward and brushed his lips against the southerner's softly. Vin took the other wineglass he was holding and took a sip. He then turned the glass with the part that had touched his lips and offered it to Ezra. "Drink with me," Vin again whispered.
Ezra's mouth could not resist the temptation, and he placed his lips where Vin's lips had been on the glass. Tanner tipped the glass slowly letting his love drink some of the contents. He then brought the glass back to his own lips and finished the wine. Then both glasses were taken by Vin and placed on the table.
"Mr. Tanner…" Ezra started to say.
"It's Vin, Ezra," he softly reprimanded, as the man tried to pull away from him.
Vin pulled Standish into his arms and up against his body and smiled. Ezra could not move as the warm content feeling of being in Vin's arms washed all thoughts of escaping out of his mind. He felt like he was home at last.
"Vin…" Ezra tried to continue, but Vin kissed him, not wanting words right now.
Ezra could not refuse, and in fact returned the kiss. The kiss was exploratory in nature, each man seeing what the other tasted like. Tongues took turns at mapping out and tasting the other's mouth.
"Thank you for the spy glass," Vin whispered, as he ended the kiss and pressed his forehead against his lover's.
"Vin, how did you know it was me?" Ezra asked, as he again tried to pull away.
The thought that this was just a payment for the spyglass made him uncomfortable. The last thing he needed was to have Vin feeling obligated to him for a gift.
"Would you be mad if I told you someone who knew I cared about you told me?"
"You care about me?" Ezra could not hide the shock in his voice.
"Yeah, I think I might even be in love with ya."
"Love me?" Ezra whispered.
"Only you, Ez." Vin vowed.
"Are you sure, Vin? I mean absolutely sure?"
"Yep! I want a chance for us to find out. I want ta court ya, woo ya, and then make you mine."
Ezra felt like the sun had come out, and his life was now looking worth living. He was going to find out what it felt like to be loved. "Then court, woo, and claim to your heart's content, my Mr. Tanner." Ezra smiled, as he pulled the man down for a soul- searching kiss.
The kiss seemed to last forever, almost making the two lovers forget the courting and wooing. Ezra finally pulled out of the kiss, but not out of Vin's embrace. "Vin…I think we had better check on dinner," Standish chuckled.
"I think you're right."
"Vin, I hope you don't mind me asking, but how did you get all of this done?"
"Buck helped."
"So, it was Buck you were on the phone with on and off since he left?"
"You don't mind do ya? Chris helped as well."
"CHRIS!"
"Ez, Chris has known I had feelin's for ya since the day we met."
"That Mr. Tanner will be another discussion at another date."
"Ez, don't be mad."
"I'm not mad at you, Vin, but at myself. How could I have missed your feelings for me for so long?"
"'Cause I didn't want ya to know. Chris knows me like I know him; we are brothers of the soul."
"So, Buck and Chris helped you to arrange all of this. Do any of the others know anything about us?"
"No, it will be up to us to tell them."
"Can we have some time together first, to see where this courtship goes?" Ezra asked hopefully.
"Yes, since I think we will have all the time in the world," Vin promised.
Ezra smiled as Vin's body directed him to the dining room chair. The sensuous sway of the man's hips drove the southerner to distraction, and Vin's hands guiding his hips to sit in the chair nearly drove him over the edge. His lips were taken softly in a brief kiss before his love returned to the kitchen. This left Ezra alone to silently thank Buck for being so observant a friend.
Vin continued the courtship by waiting on Ezra, anticipating everything he would need during dinner. Ezra, being uncomfortable at first with being waited on, had tried to assist. Vin would not let him lift a finger to help, explaining this was his gift to Ezra.
"I'm givin' you a gift from the heart, my heart. From this day forward Ezra you will know you are loved."
Standish noticed the sincerity in Vin's gift and did nothing to interfere. He would not do anything to hurt his beloved on purpose ever again. Ezra sat back and let Vin show how much he loved him and felt treasured for the first time in his life.
After dinner Vin allowed him to help with the clean up, having a dishwasher was a wonderful thing. They worked so well together no words were needed as they each completed their tasks.
With the clean up completed, Vin took Ezra and led him over to the overstuffed chair in the living room. A fire was burning in the fireplace, giving a warm glow to the room. Tanner sat and pulled his partner down with him, the chair big enough for them to sit close but comfortable together.
"I just want to be close to you for a while." Vin smiled, as he guided their bodies in a comfortable position, placing Ezra's head on his shoulder.
"This feels so good. There are no words out there to describe this feeling," Ezra sighed.
"Yeah there is Ezra," Vin stated.
"The fire that burns in this room is nothing compared to the fire that burns in my soul for you. I have traveled a lifetime searching for what I needed to feel this heat. I have found it in the most peculiar place, for I feel it when I look upon your face. I could live a thousand life-times but never feel the fire as warm and bright as right now with you," Vin stated.
"Vin, that is beautiful."
"So are you."
They continued to sit in silence letting the moment etch itself deep into their memories. They sat like that for hours just letting the fire warm them, inside and out. Before long it was time for Vin to go home.
"I love you, Ezra P. Standish," Vin smiled.
"I love you, Vincent Tanner," Standish smiled back.
They kissed at the door, savoring the moment. Ezra wanted so much to just grab Vin's hand and lead him toward the bedroom, but this was Vin's way of making sure they took it slow and did it right. He had to agree; it was wonderful being courted and wooed.
The sudden blaring and beeps intruded in Ezra's sweet memories. At first he was dazed and could not remember where he was. He had not realized that he had fallen asleep, but the jostling of his body as hands were pulling him out of the chair and frantic voices were calling, "CODE BLUE, SICU ROOM SIX, CODE BLUE," brought him suddenly crashing back into the present.
"NO!" Ezra screamed, as he fought the hands pulling him back.
"Ezra, come on we have to let them do their job," Josiah begged, as he tried to get the younger man to move away from Vin's bedside.
"Josiah, let me go," Ezra growled, as he began to fight to break free.
Buck and JD pulled Chris towards the door as the nurses and doctors rushed in with their equipment, and shouted orders for them to leave. Chris pushed Buck away, yelling that he was not leaving. "Fuck off! I'm staying right here."
Nathan moved to assist Josiah with Ezra when he saw the southern fool fight to remain in the room and thought to himself how selfish Standish was being.
"Let me go, I promise not to interfere. PLEASE! I have to stay," Ezra pleaded, still pushing Josiah and Nathan away and refusing to leave.
Chris heard the begging and felt pain in their friend's voice. The urge to protect and comfort the man brought him back to reality. Ezra needed him now because he understood his pain and fear.
"Buck, Ezra needs us. I'm fine for now, let's get him outta here," Chris informed his oldest friend.
Buck looked closely and saw that the ATF leader was back in control. The concern in Larabee's eyes as they darted between him, Ezra, and Vin was lucid and determined. Chris was now determined to be there for the younger man who had become a valued friend.
Everything happened very fast as they converged together and managed to get Ezra out of Vin's room. The doctors and nurses continued to work on their friend, trying to figure out what was wrong and how to fix it. Nathan had seen the monitor and knew that the injured man's heart had stopped and the code team was working to bring Vin back.
Dr. Henry, the surgical chief resident in charge of Mr. Tanner's care, prayed he would not be telling this group of men of their comrade's death. He, for one, did not want to see the devastation of one particular member. Dr. Henry had been on call when they brought the downed agent in to the shock trauma unit. He'd been the one to take him to surgery, to tell his teammates his chances, and to watch as they taught him what it truly meant to be a doctor.
The love this group of men, especially Ezra, had for this man touched his heart and left his soul wanting. He wanted someone to love him as deeply and to believe in him without reservation. It gave him the incentive not to let go, to use all the skills and resources that were available to him.
The others were able to pull Ezra out into the hall before he broke away. His angry glare hid nothing as he stared the five men down, five men he had thought to be his friends.
"I would not have gotten in the way," Ezra firmly stated.
"Ez, ya didn't need to be in there," Nathan replied.
"YES… I… DID!" the southerner snarled back.
"Son-" Josiah started, only for Ezra to interrupt.
"Mr. Sanchez, I am not your SON!" Standish growled.
"Ezra-" Chris started, and he was cut off as well.
"I don't need your shit either," Ezra spit out.
The five men looked closely at their friend and co-worker of two years. The use of profanity alerted them to how close Ezra was to losing it.
"Ez…" J.D. whispered, as tears fell down his face.
"Mr. Dunne, I needed, no I need to be in there. He needs to know I'm there for him," Ezra stated, as he started toward the door to Vin's room.
"Ezra, you cannot go in there." Chris moved to stand in front of his undercover agent, and friend.
"Mr. Larabee, I have to be there. You of all people should understand my need to be there. Could they have dragged you out of Sarah's or Adam's room?" Ezra's eyes pleaded for Chris to understand and help him.
Chris's first reaction was to strike out and punch Ezra in the mouth. The pain from the possibility of losing his friend, mixed with the resurfacing of the grief of losing his family, played havoc on his sanity. Then it struck him that he was in the position that Buck was in just five years back.
Ezra looked at the men's faces, pleading for them to understand him. He could not believe that they did not comprehend the urgency of his need to be with Vin if he should not make it. The feeling of overwhelming failure that he was not going to be able to keep his promise to Vin pulled the rug out from under his feet.
"You don't understand. We'd promised each other to be there for one another 'til the end. If anything happened to either of us, the other would be there to say good-bye," Ezra revealed, as his self-control shattered.
Ezra fell to his knees as his world collapsed. The sobs shook his body as the pain became unbearable. He could not respond to the arms that encircled him and pulled him close. The southerner was so caught up in the sorrow and guilt of not keeping his promise to Vin that he tuned out everything around him. He did not feel the arms or hear the voice trying to offer comfort.
Chris had dropped down to his knees in front of the broken man and had taken him in to his arms, telling Ezra as he rocked him back and forth in his arms, the reasons why they could not let him stay in the room.
"Ezra, we're sorry. Vin would understand, I promise. He would expect us not to let you be there right now. He would expect me to be right here holding you. Vin would not want you to bear so much pain and guilt," Chris pleaded.
Josiah, Buck, JD, and Nathan stood around the two men on their knees, shielding them as much as possible from prying eyes, while Chris held Ezra as he cried. They wanted to give the men as much privacy as they could out in the open hallway outside of Vin's room. Most of the staff was in the sharpshooter's room, but the others continued to take care of other ill patients.
It suddenly hit Chris that he was doing for Ezra what Buck had done for him. Chris prayed Ezra's love of his life would not be taken from the southerner, as Sarah had been taken from him. Chris looked up and met his best friend's eyes and smiled sadly. The look of understanding that radiated from Buck's eyes made him mouth the words, "Thank you."
Buck could not hold the tears back as he flashed back to the time when Chris found out about Sarah and Adam. He understood what Chris was implying, and he replied as silently with, "Your welcome." Buck saw the tears running down the JD's face and pulled young man into a brotherly hug.
"Don't worry, JD. Jr. will pull through this, you just wait and see," Buck stated, as he consoled his friend.
"I hope you’re right Buck. 'Cause if you're not, Ezra will be lost to us," JD mumbled.
Josiah watched his boy as grief over took him. He looked at Chris as he rocked Ezra in the hallway and knew they needed to find somewhere more private. The knowledge that he would lose his boy if Vin died sent a chill deep into his heart. He prayed to the good Lord for his guidance and his intervention to keep such a thing from happening. He refused to believe that God would let Ezra suffer such a devastating loss. The boy's painful life experiences were too much already in such a short life span.
Nathan could no longer fight back the tears as he watched Standish fall to his knees. 'Til this moment he never believed Ezra loved Vin as much as he was seeing demonstrated now. He knew without a doubt that he would be doing the same thing if it was Rain in Vin's place.
Nathan did the only thing he could; he went inside Vin's room to see what was going on. He wanted to see if it was not too late to bring Ezra back into the room, to give the man the opportunity they all would want if it was their loved one. The opportunity to be there to say good-bye, if given the chance.
Nurse Henderson watched as security came to the floor. Nurse Gates, the charge nurse, had called them when Mr. Standish began to be uncooperative about leaving Mr. Tanner's room. She watched how the man broke down in the hall and wanted so much to help him. She took it upon herself to run interference with security, since Nurse Gates was in with Mr. Tanner.
"Gentlemen, can I help you?" She smiled at the security officers, Mr. Sims and Mr. Collins.
"Miss Henderson, we were called up here for a disturbance," Mr. Collins replied.
"It's okay, we are taking care of it," Miss Henderson sternly replied.
"What do you call that?" Mr. Sims asked, as he pointed to the men gathered in the hallway.
"Mr. Tanner, the critically injured ATF agent, has just taken a turn for the worse," she sadly informed the officers.
"Damn! Let us know if there is anything we can do," Mr. Collins offered.
"I will. I just want to go and help his fellow officers to a more private place to wait." Nurse Henderson turned and had started toward the men, when she noticed the older gentleman smiling at her. She could see the tears falling freely down the man's face.
"Hi, my name is Miss Henderson. I'm one of the nurses here and would like to offer you the use of our break room. It would give you and your friends some privacy," she said softly.
"Your first name is Maggie, is it not?" Josiah smiled, as he offered his hand. "My name is Josiah, Josiah Sanchez."
"Yes, I'm Maggie." Maggie smiled, feeling his blue eyes touch her soul.
"I would like it if you would call me Josiah. I would very much like to take you up on the offer of the break room. That is, if it's no inconvenience to the other staff members?" the preacher responded.
"It would not be a bother. Please, come with me and we will get everyone settled. There is a coffee machine in the room and plenty of sitting space. A phone is there if you need to call anyone. Don't worry; you won't be an inconvenience to the majority of the people here. The others, well they can be dealt with," Maggie stated, followed by a wink.
Josiah was taken by the large blue eyes of one Maggie Henderson. He would do nothing about his attraction now, but when Ezra was settled, he would. He nodded, then returned to his friends and informed them of Maggie's offer.
Moving Ezra into the break room took both Chris and Josiah to lift him to his feet and guide the shell of a man there. It scared Josiah to see the lack of emotion now coming from the young man.
Buck led JD into the room, knowing the younger man was reliving his mother's illness and passing. The ladies' man looked toward Vin's room where Nathan had disappeared to about ten minutes or so ago. 'Seems like an eternity, the last couple days,' he thought.
"Where is Nathan?" Chris asked.
"He's in the room with Jr., checking up on him. He'll be back real soon," Buck whispered and looked at Ezra at the same time.
Ezra had blocked them out a long time ago. The feelings of betrayal, abandonment, and failure overwhelmed him into a state of shock. The voices just mumbled; his body was just there to be placed somewhere out of the way. Without Vin, he was nothing.
Buck recognized the look, having seen it before when Chris blocked out everything after Sarah and Adam's deaths. The only difference was he did not think they would be able to save Ezra from himself. Ezra did not know how to use his friends and draw on their strength, having had none 'til now. He would run from the pain and withdraw back behind that wall that Vin had helped break down. No, their friend would not stay with them and risk being hurt like this again.
Nathan watched as orders were shouted out and medical procedures were done. Dr. Henry recognized the ATF medic and waved him over. "Mr. Jackson, it would seem the chest tube had come out. It caused the lung to collapse, which shifted air over and placed pressure on the heart causing it to stop, but we have gotten his heart beating again. We placed in a new chest tube, and now we are just working at getting Mr. Tanner more comfortable. It was touch and go, but I think he is going to be fine. As long as no infection develops he should recover. We just don't know if there are any severe head injuries that may have come from the fall, or if there will be any serious effects for the periods of being without oxygen. The CT scan done yesterday showed that there was swelling. I would like to repeat it tomorrow as long as he continues to stabilize," Dr Henry explained, offering a smile of relief.
"Can Ezra come back in?" Nathan asked.
"Yes, please let him come back. I would like to talk with him if I may?" Dr. Henry asked.
"Certainly, please talk with him. I also have a favor to ask," the medic asked with a slight pleading in his tone.
"Go ahead and ask."
"If Vin has another crisis, I want Ezra to be allowed to stay. It seems they promised each other to be together 'til the end, to say good-bye," Nathan whispered, as he looked over at Vin and smiled, relieved that the man was still alive.
"I do not see problem with that, as long as he understands that he has to let us do our job. That is what I wanted to talk with him about anyway," the doctor explained.
Both men looked at each other and smiled. Nathan's respect for this man before him grew significantly. He was going to turn out to be a good bedside, people doctor yet. Nathan's impression of the good doctor was not a good one when they had first met. He thought the man to be a typical, cocky, pain in the ass, surgeon. The events over the last couple days, especially today, had changed that characterization of the man standing before him now.
Ezra silently chastised himself for losing control. The others must think of him as being weak and selfish. He could not help but wonder how disgusted Vin would have been at his behavior. His mother, she would disown him if she ever found out about his embarrassing emotional display.
The southerner could hear mumbled voices, and he felt hands touch and direct him somewhere. It did not matter now, especially if Vin was lost to him forever. Nothing would ever matter again. He tuned out the voices; he did not want to hear someone tell him his lover had died. Ezra could not face the fact that he broke his promise to be there. In his heart he knew that Vin would have been there for him.
The inner struggle was on for Ezra to regain his composure and to become strong again. He did not want to lean on the others or accept their pity for him. He needed his Vin, 'My Vin, I need you like a wild flower needs the rain to help it flourish and grow. Without you as my rain, I will surely curl up and die.' Ezra crawled deeper into himself seeking comfort in the memories of happier times with his Vin Tanner, who was very much alive.
Standish sat back and smiled as he watched the sun set. He and Vin had been seriously seeing each other for a month now. Tanner definitely put his all into courting and wooing him, but the tracker had yet to claim him like he had promised to do. Ezra was sure that tonight was the night that everything was going to change. Vin had kept dropping hints throughout the day, as if he was preparing his lover for the act."Seems like today is a special day," The tracker had said that more than a few times through out the day. The look in those blue eyes had been intense each time, possessive. The kiss Vin had given him in the Jag, before going to his jeep, was a clear promise of something more to come. That something had Ezra at that moment praying for the man's swift arrival, so his new life with Vin would start.
With today being Friday, the plans were to the start off the weekend with dinner at Ezra's tonight. They would then watch a few movies and relax together. It was the best way to start a weekend off, in the words of one Vin Tanner.
Ezra looked at the time and knew Vin would be there any minute. He looked over the dining table making sure everything was in place. He decided to light the candles and dim the lights, before going into the kitchen to check on dinner.
Standish walked into the kitchen to check on the special dinner he was preparing for Vin. He had made Vin's favorite dish of toasted ravioli with a meat sauce, green beans, and cheesy garlic bread. Ezra had been able to get the recipe for the ravioli's from Mario, who was the chef at their favorite restaurant, Bella's.
Ezra had just finished taking the bread out of the oven when the doorbell rang. His heart started to race from the excitement of seeing Vin again. 'I know tonight is the night. By tomorrow morning I will fully belong, heart, body, and soul to one Vin Tanner.' Ezra gave the kitchen and dining table one last glance to make sure everything was perfect, before going to answer the door.
The sensual smile on Vin's lips as his eyes raked Ezra's body increased Ezra's heart rate, causing it to race even faster. Standish returned the look with a radiant smile of his own that reached his desire filled eyes. 'Yes, tonight is the night he will claim me as his.'
Vin walked up to Ezra and claimed him with a sweet, soul-searching kiss. The feeling of love that radiated in the kiss shot though his body, like a flash of lightening hitting a tree, swift, fast and electrifying. He felt like he was being drawn deep into Vin's body as his lover slipped his tongue inside his welcoming mouth.
Standish could not bring himself to even think of breaking the kiss of a lifetime. Vin slowly pulled away, occasionally nibbling at his lover's lower lip.
"Ez, ya taste so good. God, I've missed ya," Vin purred as he brushed past Ezra to get into the house.
"Vin, we've just left work two hours ago." The southerner chuckled as he watched Tanner walk into the kitchen to drop off the bags he had brought.
"Ez, I miss ya when we're only a room apart." Vin turned and smiled at Ezra as he followed him into the kitchen.
"I feel the same way," Ezra replied. His curiosity got the better of him as he looked at the bag Vin was carrying. "Did you bring dessert?"
"Nope, it's already here." Vin smiled and started to unload the bags and put the items away. The beer went in the fridge, and the chips and other snack items went in the cupboard. "But, I did bring something to top it with." He smiled as he picked up the can of whip cream out of the bag.
"What is for dessert?" Ezra frowned, trying to remember what could possibly be topped off with whip cream.
"You!"
"ME?"
Vin raked his eyes up and down Ezra's body with a hungry look in his eyes. "Yeah, you. I think that whipped cream would look good on ya and taste great." When their eyes met there was no mistaking the desire in Vin's face. "Yep, I can't wait for dessert. Ya see, it's somethin' I've been craving for a long time now. But, I can be a good boy and wait 'til after dinner."
The thought of being covered in whipped cream as his lover's dessert had Ezra shocked and unable to respond at first. No one had ever made him feel like Vin made him feel at this moment. He felt for the first time in his life that he was desired, wanted, loved, and special.
Ezra shook himself out of his shocked state and walked over to where Vin was standing, took the can of whipped cream and shook it gently. He smiled as he took off the cap after stroking the lid a few times. The effects of his seduction were not lost on Ezra; he noticed how Vin's breathing quickened and how his eyes had dilated.
Ezra lifted the can as his index finger stroked up and down the nozzle slowly, his tongue peaked out and licked his lips in anticipation of his treat. A gentle squeeze of the nozzle allowed the white cream to enter his mouth. He watched as Tanner's fascination with his actions intensified, a groan escaping Vin's throat as the cream filled his lover's mouth.
"Ez-" Vin started to say.
Ezra pulled Vin into a slow and intoxicating kiss that neither man dominated. They shared the promise of loving each other and of being together at last in the sweet connection of their souls.
Standish slowly broke the kiss but continued to clean the cream from his lover's lips. Vin then returned the favor as they smiled at the bond that this kiss had formed. There was no way either man would turn back now; they were mated for life.
"Just thought I would give you a small taste of what you are in store for," Ezra whispered as his green eyes smiled at his life mate.
Vin moved to kiss Ezra again and groaned when his partner managed to place the table between them. The southerner watched as his lover started to calculate his capture.
"Dinner first, then dessert. I spent too much time making this especially for you. Now, go and sit down and I will bring it out," Ezra instructed his paramour.
"Rather have you," Vin smiled wickedly, wagging his eyebrows.
"You have me; I'm yours for as long as you will have me," Ezra promised.
"Then be prepared to be amazed for the rest of your life, fancy man," Vin winked, as he turned to leave the kitchen.
"Your fancy man."
"Yeah, and don't ya forget it. Together 'til the end, forever," Vin replied from the dining room.
Ezra then fixed their plates and took Vin's surprise out to him. The look on his partner's face was priceless when he set the meal before him. Ezra took the seat across from the love of his life. The candlelight brought a soft glow to Vin's skin that made him even more handsome, if that was possible.
"I hope you like it. I'm sure it is not up to par with Mario's, but I did use his recipe," Ezra smiled.
Vin's smile was all Ezra needed to know he had chosen correctly. "Ya cooked this for me?"
"Yes, I cooked this just for you."
"Ezra, nobody has ever done anything special for me like this before." Tanner glanced at him, and Standish could see the child that was a part of Vin looking back at him. He felt like he had just presented Vin with the best gift of all time.
"I wanted this night to be special for us, for you. Something we would remember on our 25th anniversary and reminisce about the night we first made love," Ezra whispered.
"Ya made this for me and ya think we will be together in 25 years. Have I told ya today that I love ya?" Vin's eyes misted with tears of happiness as he looked at Ezra from across the table.
"Not in words. But, I'm beginning to realize that I don't need the words to know how you feel about me…about us," Ezra smiled.