~~ The South Wind ~~

by TJ

They sat on his porch all day.

There were long periods of silence between the quiet chatter. Both of them seemed to understand the need to think over one’s thoughts.

Initially their conversation had been about his friendship with the other peacekeepers and how it had grown over the months that they had been together. The gunslinger had slowly accepted the presence of the six other men, although they all needed their own space, from time to time. The important thing was that they worked well as a team when things got dicey. That’s what they were paid to do and they did it well. All their differences weren’t important when it really counted.

Athena had again pressed him for an answer as to why he thought he was leaving. His response had been ‘they don’t want me around’ and she had only smiled. It pissed him off that she assumed she knew them better than he did. ‘They’re my friends, not yours.’ Looking into his green eyes, she had only grinned. ‘Yes, …they are.’

He really hated it when she twisted his words but he couldn’t help but accept her reply gracefully. Everything made sense when she explained his world…

They talked more about The Seven throughout the morning and into afternoon. Then she had grown quiet and closed her eyes. For a long time she just sat and listened to the wind... almost as though she was waiting for a sign.

Larabee didn’t disturb her.

A lingering shadow in the blond’s mind posed a question that Athena needed answering. She hoped he would be strong enough to respond. "Can you tell me about Sarah… and your child?"

Chris wasn’t prepared for her question but his anguished expression did not deter her need for an answer. This man had lost himself when he had lost his family… of this fact she was sure. Giving him time to calm his defenses, Athena waited patiently for his response.

An hour passed before the gunslinger sat back down. He looked long and hard at the woman beside him. She knew his wife’s name. What else does she know? Chris recognized that he carried a terrible scar on his heart. He guessed it might be obvious to someone as incredibly sensitive as Athena appeared to be. He didn’t really believe that she could read his mind but whatever her reasons were, the woman was asking… and she expected an answer.

He didn’t exactly know why, but for the first time, Larabee truly accepted and trusted her presence. Taking a deep, calming breath, he began to relate his life story to the stranger beside him.

They talked past sundown and then moved back inside his home.

Chris heated up some stew and cut bread for their meal as Athena continued to talk. She seemed to understand so much and her peacefulness gave him a different prospective on the world around him.

Laying out plates and spoons, Chris served the supper. Returning with the bread, he sat down and watched as she poured some water and joined him.

They ate quietly, but thoughts raced incessantly through Athena’s mind. Finally, she could hold her questions, no longer. "The dark side of your soul hides the man inside."

Larabee glanced at her and frowned. "I suppose you’re right… but it keeps me alive."

Setting her spoon beside the plate, she looked at him oddly. "And… it keeps you from living."

Her remark stopped Chris in his tracks. He stared at her questioningly. All manner of emotions flowed through his heart. How can she know…?

Understanding that she’d hit a nerve, Athena took a deep breath and hid her eyes from his glare. Slowly, she finished her meal.

Watching her apprehensively, Larabee, too, returned to his meal.

No more words were spoken as they cleaned up and moved to the fire.

Athena chose to sit on the floor again and Chris watched as she assumed the same contemplative position that she had taken the night before.

Watching her relaxation somehow seemed to calm him as well. Some time passed before he finally broke the silence. "Do you want me to brush out your hair again?" His reasons for asking were selfish, as well as practical. He knew her shoulder could use the time to heal. But, as he thought about the torn stitches, her other injuries flashed in his mind. The swelling on her face would take many days to go down. The bruises would remain for a quite some time as well, of that he was sure. Chris was certain that her split lip would take the longest to heal.

Guilt plagued the gunslinger again. Offering to help was but a small token…

"I can manage."

"Please, let me…"

Athena could sense his self-loathing, yet there was something else, too. A deep desire to make amends, perhaps? She turned and smiled softly at him over her shoulder before handing him the brush.

Half an hour passed as Larabee worked the brush through the strands methodically. Finishing his task, he set the brush on the table he lowered his head. All this time he’d been thinking over her words from dinner. It keeps you from living… Chris sucked in his breath. "It’s been too long…" he said woefully. "I can’t change the way I am. I like to be alone. I’ve got used to it… I think better when I’m alone."

The woman nodded in understanding, yet looked at him doubtfully. She had sensed his conflict as he brushed her hair but she only understood part of what he meant. She’d seen him in town. He was relaxed… almost at home there, sometimes. Yes, there was a part of him that didn’t want to be there on occasions, but he did his best to keep it at bay. "You must not change the essence of who you are," she whispered in the darkness. "All that you say and do… all of your actions… these are the things that make you the man you are. You must accept these things as strengths, not faults." Athena turned to face him and looked up into his green pools. "My soul is free when I am alone, yet yours feels the pain of your losses… Only your whiskey helps to lessen the ache in your heart."

Chris tensed at her declaration, yet he did not move.

His reaction had quick and decisive. The woman turned from his gaze. Thinking better of her direct approach, Athena decided her questions should stop for a while.

Silence ensued and neither party objected to the serene atmosphere that settled upon them. They sat quietly watching the fire for more than an hour but Larabee couldn’t help but watch the woman as well. She twisted all his words and that irritated him to no end. Yet, there was truth in her and he was beginning to realize it. It had been so long since a woman… since anyone… had made him feel like this… "Well…" he spoke sleepily. "Suppose it’s about time we turned in," he shuffled in the chair. "You’d best get yourself to bed now… if we’re going to do some more talking tomorrow."

Athena took a deep breath and lowered her head. She’d thought about her next words carefully but there was not easy way to say them. She couldn’t let him spend another night in his chair, yet she was hesitant to offer the space beside her on the bed. She knew he would let her sleep on the floor, yet she didn’t want him to think she was offering more than a place next to her. Getting to her feet, she continued to stare at the flames. Shed dared not look into his eyes. "You must not sleep in this chair again tonight," she said softly.

He hesitated for just a moment, unsure of what she was saying. "Oh, I’ll be alright, you go on now," he motioned towards the bed.

Athena took a deep breath and turned to face him. Reaching for his arm, she looked at him hesitantly. "I offer nothing more than the space beside me… It is your bed… But, if you will not use it, then nor shall I."

The silence was deafening…

Slowly, Athena walked towards the exit.

Larabee considered his options as he watched the door close. He really wasn’t looking forward to another night in this damn chair but he couldn’t swear he could trust himself lying next to this woman. He’d spent the last two days getting used to her and several times; he’d caught himself watching her. The way she tilted of her head as she swung her hair around, or the way she caressed her bare shoulders when she was deep in thought. Her peaceful, gentle manner was so distracting… and alluring…

Athena returned a few minutes later. As the door closed, she looked at him, awaiting his decision.

Chris took a deep thoughtful breath before conceding the point. He glanced at the floor before getting to his feet. Pursing his lips, he cautiously moved towards the bed. Pulling back the covers, he sat and took off his boots and gun belt.

Athena swallowed hard before making her way to the bed. Intent on securing control, she sat on the mattress and slid her bare feet underneath the blanket. Making herself as comfortable as possible, she purposely turned her back to the man. She did not want to look at him.

Chris watched the woman settle before he, too, tried to get comfortable in the bed. Although he’d spent more than a few nights with Maria in Purgatory, this was the first time, in three long years that he’d had a woman in his own bed. Gazing at the bare shoulders and long blond hair, the gunslinger felt a familiar urge. He started to reach out for her before stopping himself abruptly. Athena had made it clear that she offered nothing more than the bed. Closing his eyes tightly, Larabee tried to go to sleep.

~~~~~~~ 7 ~~~~~~~ 7 ~~~~~~~ 7 ~~~~~~~ 7 ~~~~~~~ 7 ~~~~~~~

Athena stirred. The haziness of sleep gradually gave way to awareness and she could see two beautiful green pools shining through the darkness… yet there was still a shadow of sorrow behind them. The woman opened her eyes slowly to look at the man who had been watching her sleep. His eyes sparkled as she returned his gaze. He was handsome, this dark stranger…No! I must not call him dark, anymore.

Athena knew better now… This man had been a victim of circumstances beyond his control. He carried guilt few men knew. It left him with a deep wound in his soul and created a dark spirit for all to perceive. Larabee had become an enigma. If he could not overcome an obstacle with his dark presence, or his gun, he simply retreated and moved on.

Then he became the leader to this group of men. Some strange fate had brought them together and eventually the blond took comfort in the circumstances that had befallen them. Yet, now he was running away again; his trust and confidence shattered once more. Somehow, Athena needed make him accept and understand. No man can control everything that goes on around him, every single moment of every single day. The blame and self-loathing needed to end.

Seeing only his despair, Athena reached out and gently caressed the soft stubble on his chin. She hadn’t seen him shave since she’d arrived. But, the growing beard was nice. She liked it.

Chris watched her eyes study him and he smiled gently as she touched his face. Responding naturally, he reached out to stroke her arm.

Athena’s gaze followed his hand as it traced a path to her shoulder, and then moved on to her lips. Suddenly aware of their situation, the woman bowed her head, pulling her bruises away from his gently touch. There was a time and place for such caresses but now was not it. She felt a familiar longing but Larabee had truly hurt her. Athena always believed there was a purpose for everything that happened… but she still couldn’t fully understand where she stood with this man. Something deep inside told her that Chris was just as lost as she was. Yet, for all that had passed between them, the woman could not detach herself from him… she had a job to do. And, she was determined to complete her task. Pulling away from his touch was her only way to tell him to go no further.

The gunslinger understood her message too clearly. He distanced himself and sat up in the bed.

Athena closed her eyes and turned her face to the pillow. She did not want him to see the confusion or desire in her heart. She had a responsibility to these men. She needed to see to Chris and move on. Looking in the opposite direction, she searched for something to break the impasse. Noting the shadows, she spoke softly. "The sun has risen to its task… and so must we." Sliding out of bed, she straightened her clothing. She didn’t look at him as she carefully stretched and left him alone in the room.

Chris forced his eyes shut and pursed his lips. He was disappointed in his actions. Mad at himself for assuming… How could she possibly trust me after what I did? He knew the woman was here to work… and nothing more. He was slowly beginning to accept her wisdom. Their conversations had made him realize a few important facts. Athena had a gentle way about her when she was ‘on task’. She made everything seem so easy... Wiping the tangled thought from his head, the blond got out of bed and fixed the blankets.

They had some biscuits and coffee to start their day off again. No words were spoken even after they moved outside. Larabee walked out his taut muscles as he finished his brew. He thought over her words from last night. ‘You must not change the essence of who you are. All that you say and do… all of your actions… these are the things that make you the man you are. You must accept these things as strengths, not faults.’ Perhaps she wasn’t here to try and change him. Maybe she just wanted him to accept himself the way he was and not lay blame for being…

"Your patience for others, has limits," she spoke as he sat down beside her. "You should not attempt to alter this… but merely extend those boundaries."

Setting his cup down, he looked at her curiously.

The woman smiled. "You have become accustomed to the ways in which you now live your life," she tried to clarify. "When the presence of others becomes too much, you step back. You must not see this as a failure. It is simply a trait of the man you have become." Athena had spoken these same words to this man’s oldest friend several days ago. The cowboy had understood he could not change this man too much. "Your heart tells you when to go and when to stay… And, you are compelled to listen. You cannot fight it. No one could have stopped you from leaving your town when you did… No one could have stopped you from leaving your family when you did."

Chris looked at her harshly but his expression slowly dissipated.

Athena’s face was full of reassurance as she continued quietly. "Fate has no room for condemnation and despair. You need to rid yourself of these feelings and move on."

Chris took a deep breath. "It’s not that easy."

"Nothing worthy… ever is… The answer lies in acceptance." Turning her body in the chair, the woman looked at him and smiled gently. "Acceptance is the gift of absolution. You need not change who you are… or forget what has gone before… You need simply, to forgive… Accept yourself for being who you are and you will be free from your demons."

Her words were but a whisper yet, Chris understood all too clearly, there meaning. He watched as she lowered her head and he couldn’t help but wonder, how one gentle creature, could understand so much.

After several long minutes Athena got to her feet and wandered over to the corral.

Larabee took a deep breath and closed his eyes. For a long while he simply sat and thought over her words... Again, he’d heard her say that he didn’t have to change his ways. It sounded as though she was merely suggesting that he forgive himself for all that he could not change. His torment was his own and perhaps the demons that she spoke of were his mind’s creation.

An hour passed and he found himself just watching her. He truly wondered who, or what, had sent her to him… to them all. None of The Seven were easy people to know. But, then again… neither was she. Yet, over the last few days, Larabee had learned to accept her. She mystified him… but… Gazing at the corral, Chris had to smile. Even his strong willed horse seemed to have taken a liking to her and that was highly unusual for his spirited beast. Acknowledging the peace in his heart, the gunslinger got up and moved to the corral.

Athena stood by his horse and patted it gently.

"He doesn’t make friends easily," Chris huffed.

The woman lay her head on the animal’s temple. "Then he is like his master." She glanced at Larabee before focusing on the ground. Something else had been nagging Athena and she just had to ask. "There is another who appeals for your companionship?" Leaving the comfort of his mount, she moved to the other side of the enclosure.

Chris stroked his horse for a few minutes before following. He knew exactly who she was speaking of but was unclear how to talk about Mary to the woman. "Yes…" he said as he leaned against the fence. "Don’t reckon I quite know…"

Athena turned quickly and looked deep into his green pools. She held his gaze for an eternity before closing her eyes. She stood and listened to the wind.

The gunslinger just watched, afraid to disturb her concentration.

Finally, she came back to him. She opened her hazel eyes and smiled softly. "She too must accept what is in your heart. But, …you must make your peace before…" Athena turned away. "I see contentment if you can find your true self."

The blond looked puzzled. "What does that mean?" he questioned.

Athena turned back to him, laid her hand on his chest and looked into his eyes. A gentle smile crept across her face. "Be true to your heart…"

Chris felt she had more to say but her confusion was evident. He frowned.

Athena had meant to add his name at the end of her sentence but she felt the one she knew was not right. Removing her hand from his chest, she narrowed her gaze. "Your name is Christopher?"

He looked at her and frowned. He couldn’t believe her question. She’d been in town with them for eleven days and out here alone with him for four more. She hadn’t addressed him by his name in all that time. "Yeah… Chris... Chris Larabee," he replied. "Don’t suppose no-one’s called me Christopher since I was little."

She looked him straight in the eye and again covered his chest with her hand. "Perhaps, this was the last time your soul spoke to you clearly." She smiled for him. "Be true to your heart, once again Christopher Larabee. Your heart and your spirit are strong. They will never lead you astray."

She started to move her hand but he held it in place and looked deep into her eyes. "Who are you?" he whispered.

All expression disappeared from her face as she returned his stare. "I am the spirit of the red wolf. I am the one who has guided you on your journey… I am The South Wind." Her hazel eyes sparkled as she removed her hand and slowly walked away.

Chris forced the air back into his lungs as he watched Athena exit the corral and walk into the meadow. He stood silently, leaning against the fence and closed his eyes.

A gentle breeze blew through two peaceful minds.

~~~~~~~ 7 ~~~~~~~ 7 ~~~~~~~ 7 ~~~~~~~ 7 ~~~~~~~ 7 ~~~~~~~

Evening came and they had dined on the porch this time. Their conversation was lighter than it had been all day. Athena wasn’t entirely sure, but somehow she felt no further need for discussion. This man would run, no more. And, she sensed, too, contentment with his decision.

Chris felt as though a great weight had been lifted. Somehow, he had understood her message. Her gentle manner had soothed his soul. He felt strangely sad when she told him she would be leaving tomorrow.

Shaking the lingering thoughts from his mind, Larabee dropped a towel on the back on the chair. He gathered his things and headed outside. "The water’s ready," he smiled.

Leaning against the support beam, Athena turned to face him. "Thank you," she replied, moving to the doorway. She stopped, looking inquisitively at the soap, towel and shaving blade in his hands.

The gunslinger took notice of her curiosity and grinned. "I’m headed down to the creek to do a little washing myself. I left your gun belt at the end of the bed. Latch the door. I’ll be back in a bit." He smiled at her again and turned to leave but a hand on his arm stopped his departure. He looked back at her questioningly.

Raising her hand to the stubble on his face, Athena caressed it gently. She lowered her eyes and carefully reached out, taking shaving blade from his hand. Her eyes sparkled as she looked back at him coyly.

Chris frowned. A few seconds passed before he smirked suspiciously, turned and headed for the creek.

The woman watched him go. His image held her gaze, far too long, before she retreating inside. She just couldn’t help it. She knew the depths of his heart and she understood their similarities too clearly. She closed her eyes, intent on driving away her thoughts. Closing the door, she latched it, as he had advised. Looking around, she was amazed at the site. Everything was laid out for her. Towels, soap, wash basins and warm water. She smiled again. He might actually pass for a gentleman!

Closing the shutters, she set about her bathing. She was expecting the East Wind to guide her to the fourth man tomorrow and she wanted to clean up before she began the journey. She had no idea how long it would take her to find the final wayward spirit she needed to heal.

~~~~~~~ 7 ~~~~~~~ 7 ~~~~~~~ 7 ~~~~~~~ 7 ~~~~~~~ 7 ~~~~~~~

He heard her unlatch the door but waited a little longer before he went inside.

Athena was in the floor by the fire drying her hair. She glanced at him as he entered, then swapped her towel for her brush and started to stroke through her locks.

He noticed her clothing immediately and Larabee couldn’t help but be pleased. Having rinsed her regular clothes, she had them drying on the backs of chairs. Athena was now wearing a colorful Indian skirt and had a pretty cloth tied around her chest. Her shoulders were still bare, as Chris had requested. He had offered to bandage and wrap her wound in preparation for the journey that lay ahead. It was healing well but he thought it would travel better if it were prepared.

Swapping his towel for bandages, he sat behind her on his chair. "Are you ready for this?" he asked, holding up the clean strips of cloth.

The woman turned to look at him. She smiled softly. "A few more minutes."

The gunslinger took in her face silhouetted against the firelight. Her true beauty shone through the bruises he had inflicted on her. The swelling of her cheeks and lip had gone down but the split was still evident. Times like these he could see all too clearly, what he had done to her that first day. Other times he was able to look beyond the surface to see the beauty that this woman held within her soul.

Athena set her hand on his knee.

One look into her eyes told Chris that she had been listening to his thoughts. Her quiet piercing concentration also let him know that there was no blame…

They stared at one another for some time, before she pulled her hair back to reveal her injured shoulder.

Chris examined it again and smiled. The weeping had stopped two days ago and now the scab on it was solid. "Well," he said happily, starting to apply the bandages. "You’ll have quite the scar when it’s healed but at least you’re alive."

A satisfied expression graced her lips.

Larabee unrolled the long strips and started by applying some of Nathan’s ointment. He gently rubbed it into her shoulder before covering it with padded cloth. Next, he applied the strips. Tugging as he wrapped, Chris made sure the bandages were secure.

His actions were uncomfortable but Athena did not let him sense her burden. He was helping her and that’s all she wanted him to know.

Using the smaller strips last, the blond tore the material and tied it off when he was finished wrapping. "You’ll need to give it some air in a couple of days..."

Athena felt him pull away.

Larabee closed his eyes, lowering his head when he realized what he was saying. She was leaving to go after Tanner and the tracker had almost a week’s head start on her. Her journey would surely be more than a couple of days.

The woman gazed at the fire and left him to his thoughts.

A deep sigh echoed off the walls of the cabin. "Are you gonna be able to find him?" he asked solemnly.

It was Athena’s turn to bow her head. She honestly didn’t know how to answer his question. The East Wind still had not appeared to reassure her. The only hope seemed to be that the young man had listened when she asked him not to go far.

Glancing back at the gunslinger, she forced a smile. "I must find him… for all of you… History must know The Seven."

Chris looked at her curiously. She had said this before but… "You say that like it means something… ‘The Seven’."

Athena turned and rose to her knees. His shirt was still unbuttoned from his washing and she could feel his heart beating in her mind as she watched his chest rise and fall. She looked at him long and hard before shutting out his image. Slowly resting her hand on his chest, she waited a minute before she spoke. Her words were filled with emotion. "I believe your heart understands, Christopher. It does… mean something. History must know The Seven. And, seven men must see destiny as one." Opening her eyes, she looked at his handsome face again.

Larabee returned her gaze. Her words were drenched with passion and he felt his heart race as he reached out and caressed her cheek. Ever so slowly, he leaned over and kissed her.

Athena could not resist him.

Pulling back to look at the woman, the blond gazed into her beautiful hazel eyes. Seeing no objection to his actions, he kissed her again.

The woman reached her hands around his body and pulled him closer. They shared another passionate embrace before stopping. They searched each other’s consciousness for a clear path to follow.

A question arose in Athena’s mind, yet her small suspicions dissolved as he kissed her yet again. She responded in kind and pushed the shirt from his shoulders. Caressing his muscular form, she pulled the clothing from his arms.

For Larabee, there were no more doubts… there were no more questions.

Or so the woman thought…

A shadow in the blond’s mind hadn’t seemed unimportant, at first. Their embraces grew increasingly torrid. She could sense his need. Yet, she did not fully comprehend his illusion until he gave up their kiss and buried his head against her shoulder.

The gunslinger took a deep, purposeful breath...

Hesitation? … But, why?

Cradling the gunslinger in her warmth, she held him as he sank to the floor beside her. With her arms wrapped tightly around his head, she stared blankly across the room and tried to understand. Long moments passed before her eyes widened slowly. Realization and acceptance greeted each other all at once. She took a long breath and kissed his temple softly. The blond’s desire was simply that… a physical need. He would allow himself nothing more. He couldn’t…

Yet, Larabee denied himself the request. He could never ask ‘this’ of Athena… he had already taken too much from her… Pulling away, Chris got to his feet. "I’m sorry," he whispered, before seeking out his shirt.

She’d had been to this place before… Athena wondered if there was a woman alive who had not chosen to give herself freely to a man, without the promise of fulfillment. She knew it was never a decision to be made lightly…

The blond refused to look at her.

Athena watched an internal struggle take place as Larabee walked across the room. His head bowed and he took another loud breath before opening the door.

"Do not go, Christopher."

The gunslinger stopped and glanced back. He watched as she came to him but looked away when her hands touched his shoulder. "You don’t understand…" he lowered his head again.

Athena ran her hands down to the small of his back and gently caressed his tense muscles. Easing the shirt from his clenched fist, she smiled. "I understand, Christopher…" she nodded. "I understand."

Embroiled in his own turmoil, the blond turned to look into her eyes. His confusion was evident. "Why would you…"

She raised her hand to his lips and stopped the words. Perhaps she was the only person who could truly know his anguish. How many times had he tried to move beyond this loss that affected him beyond all comprehension… Perhaps, Athena understood his disconnected feeling… too well…

Larabee’s fingers melded with hers as he retrieved her hand from his face. Fingers intertwined as they searched each other’s eyes once more.

A long minute passed as Chris silently questioned her intent. Why?

Athena’s equally silent reply remained unwavering. Don’t ask…

Closing his eyes, the gunslinger started to turn away but her strong arms pulled him back.

His reaction was swift and sure… Turning quickly, he kissed her wantonly.

The woman responded in kind. Her hands embraced his back and pulled him ever closer. His shirt fell silently to the floor.

Chris pushed the door closed before responding, running his hands over her bare back. He gently kneaded her skin. Working his lips down to her neck, he covered it with soft pecks while his hands held her head, and caressed it gently.

The woman’s eyes widened as his probing lips found the nape of her neck. She tried hard to conceal her delight but her knees weaken as his nibbled.

Larabee felt her squirming and understood that he had discovered a sensitive area. He nipped lightly then took Athena into his strong arms as she withered under his probing. Carrying her to the bed, he pushed back the blankets and set her down gently. He looked at her and caressed her cheek again.

She buried her face in his hand and kissed it lightly.

The gunslinger settled onto the bed and kicked off his boots. Running his other hand under her top, he slowly sought out her breasts and tenderly fondled them as he reached up to kiss the woman again.

Athena’s heart beat a little faster as his probing mouth found its way beneath the cloth on her body. His lips and tongue nuzzled her nipples while a probing hand worked its way up her legs. She pulled his mouth to hers as gentle fingers massaged her folds.

The blond smiled and kissed her again and she breathed heavily under his touch. Her wetness filled him with desire and he pushed his fingers further inside while an attentive thumb teased her button. Moving his head back to her soft mounds, he took a nipple in his mouth and sucked it gently.

Athena’s response was exactly as he had hoped for. Without hesitation, she moved her nimble fingers from his back and began to unbutton his pants. His penis grew under her manipulations and the woman’s thoughts focused completely on her task. When his buttons were undone, Athena freed his organ from its confines and pushed his pants down around his knees. She tried to move to his beckoning muscle but Chris had other ideas.

The gunslinger got off the bed and quickly discarded his remaining clothing. He gently pulled Athena to her knees and kissed her as hard as he dare. Climbing back onto the bed he turned her in his arms and nibbled at her neck from behind. His hands probed her wet folds and caressed her supple nipples.

Athena felt his hands pulling her skirt up and she ground her hips backward into his waiting cock. She understood what he wanted and had no reservations about giving it to him.

Slowly his lips left her tender neckline and the blond gently pushed the woman to the bed. His hands cupped her chest as he continued to tickle her nipples. Carefully, Larabee climbed between her legs and pushed his manhood towards her folds.

Athena could feel his engorged penis rubbing her. She felt her own wetness on his scrotum as he moved his body back and forth. She was ready for him, yet he seemed to take some extra time to make sure she was completely relaxed.

Reaching down between her legs, Larabee brushed his thumb against her clit and smiled as she moaned. Taking this as her signal of readiness, he took hold of himself and slowly probed her opening. Finding it easily in her folds, he pushed his organ in gently.

Three firm thrusts and Athena’s chin dropped. One more, hard driving motion and the woman flung her head up and looked wantonly at the gunslinger. She pushed up and twisted her body around to kiss him as he caressed her breast once more.

Chris remained impaled as they kiss deeply. And, as much as he enjoyed their position, he craved the depths of her body. He forced his tongue to the back of her throat before pushing her towards the bed. When she was again vertical, he began to stroke purposely. The blond quickly lost himself in the sensations created by their coupling.

Athena could sense his satisfaction and that only served to relax her already pleased body. His tender fingers continued to tease her nipples as her body moved under his control.

Endless, blissful minutes passed as his hands continued to snake their way along her sides. For endless minutes, he would push himself into her while he held her hips in place. And then his body would fold again and his hands would seek out her breast once more.

His actions repeated in several cycles. He kept her body alive with temptation as he slowly worked his own, to the point of no return. Athena took her own pleasure from their coupling, too.

She anticipated his orgasm. It wasn’t hard to predict. A thin bead of sweat coated his skin as his pumping became more urgent and his fingers became firm on the tender flesh of her hips. She braced herself against the pillow and rode out his need, all the while being engrossed in the sensations that he brought to her body.

Larabee’s body ached. His eyes rolled back in his head and he let out a deep moan. Pushing forcefully once… then twice more into her, he flexed his fingers and gently massaged her hips. One final stroke saw him breathe once more.

Athena held her position and waited for him to withdraw.

A long minute passed as neither body moved.

Then Chris took another deep breath and opened his eyes. Seeing the prone figure below him he smiled and slipped away from her body. Lying beside Athena he pulled her towards him and kissed her softly.

She returned his smile as they broke their embrace.

Chris searched the woman’s eyes then pecked her lips tenderly again. Sitting up, he grabbed the blankets before reclining once more. He held out his arm so she could nuzzle into his shoulder. He smiled as she complied. The blond kissed her forehead gently then closed his eyes.

The woman lay against his shoulder and listened to his heartbeat return to a normal rhythm. Time lapsed slowly as she lay sheltered in his arms.

Only when she was satisfied that he had succumbed to sleep did Athena move from his embrace. She looked down at Chris and smiled faintly. A sudden wave of sympathy engulfed her consciousness. His last defenses had fallen… and she had seen… How could I have been so blind?

Moving to the other side of the bed she lay her head down and tried to find her own slumber. Yet, she knew there would be little rest. The whispers would surely plague her consciousness tonight.

~~~~~~~ 7 ~~~~~~~ 7 ~~~~~~~ 7 ~~~~~~~ 7 ~~~~~~~ 7 ~~~~~~~

The woman woke before dawn and lay quietly listening to him breath. Somehow, she couldn’t actually be sure she had slept at all. Her head had been filled with Larabee’s secrets as she tried to settle. But, being way too much for her to think about, she had chased the troublesome thoughts away quickly.

And then, just as she had predicted, the whispers had kept her mind busy throughout the night. This often happened when the spirits were away. They brought order to the chaos that the whispers created but her spirits weren’t always there to protect her. And, this was especially true when she shared herself with the occasional earthy soul.

Shaking off the lingering thoughts, Athena pulled the blankets back and slowly eased herself out of his bed. Crossing to the chairs, she gathered her still damp clothes.

"Where you going?" the blond whispered softly from the darkness. He sat up and felt around for his summer drawers.

The woman didn’t turn to face him as she answered. "The West Wind will arrive soon. I must be ready." She bent down to pick up her boots and socks.

The gunslinger finished buttoning the thin clothing, stood up and moved towards her. Slipping his arms around her waist, he kissed her temple. "But your horse isn’t here yet, is he?" he cuddled her closer. "What if he doesn’t come?"

Staring at the dying embers in the fire, Athena lowered her head. "He will come," she replied quietly.

With her body held tightly in his arms, Chris felt her growing tension. He snuggled his chin to the crock of her neck. "Is there something wrong?" he whispered.

Silence.

Athena continued to stare at the glowing firelight. Truth be told, she wasn’t sure that her horse was coming for her. The East Wind had not visited, as he normally did when it was time to move on. Something must have kept them. All the signs were right for her go in search of the remaining man who made this brotherhood complete. They must be coming. "I have done all for you, that I can." She closed her eyes briefly. "It is time for me to leave."

Suddenly aware of her demeanor, the blond released his hold on the woman and turned her around to face him. He wiped the strands of hair from her face and looked at her closely. "But?" he lifted her chin so their eyes met. "… You’re not sure… are you? "

Athena watched him peer at her through the darkness and her face lost all emotion. She could not allow him to see her doubt…not now!

Larabee was surprised by her blank stare. He’d seen so many sides of this woman in the short time that he’d known her. He could usually manage to see some, even obscure expression on her face... but now he could see nothing.

Two people stood silently and looked into one another’s eyes for the longest time before Athena finally turned from his piercing stare…

The blond’s arm suddenly dropped to his side and his lips parted. He caught a glimpse as she turned away from him and suddenly, he felt ashamed. He averted his gaze. He wasn’t proud that he could recognize what he saw but it was the same look he had seen, for just a fleeting second, that first morning…

For the second time, Larabee had seen fear in her eyes... yet somehow this was different…

Just as desperately as he has fought his own attitude that day, the gunslinger sought to understand what he had done this time. He licked his lips. What? … What did I do…? … Oh, god! "I didn’t…" he turned to look at her quickly, "I didn’t hurt you…"

"No, Christopher," she spun around immediately, trying to stop his question. There was no reason for him to think he may have done anything wrong.

They looked at each other, searching out the truth.

"You did nothing… that I did not wish." She closed her eyes and took a deep breath. She slowly settled her boots to the floor and in one fluid motion, put her clothing on the table. She swallowed hard. Tears welled in her eyes as they opened to stare at him. "I just…I could not… no one can…" she shook her head and glanced away.

Another long pause.

Larabee took a step closer. He felt his gut tighten as his confusion grew. Gently he put his hands on her shoulders. "What? … No one can what, Athena."

Slowly looking back at him, she saw the question in his eyes and the woman knew he did not understand. Her expression softened with sadness and she took in a long, purposeful breath. "How long has your wife been gone from you, Christopher…? How long has it been since you were truly able to let anyone close?"

Without thinking, Larabee’s grip began to tighten on the woman’s shoulders, yet he knew enough to let go. His eyes glazed and he took a step back. How dare she? …How could she …Oh, god! How could she know how much he still loved Sarah… so… very… much!

A tear rolled down his cheek. His chest felt so heavy… so heavy that he thought it might burst. All the feelings… all the pain… All too suddenly, Chris felt as though he’d lost his family all over again. His breath was labored, his emotions in turmoil. Yet, somehow in the hopelessness of his despair, the gunslinger recognized his salvation. Through all that he suffered, Larabee held onto a lifeline. He held the woman’s eyes with his own. Someone finally understood…

"I am sorry," she said, quickly looking away. She had not intended to verbalize her thoughts but his grief was overwhelming. This man’s pain took so many forms and the long hours until dawn had given Athena too much time to piece together the true depth of his anguish.

The dark, cold facade that she had first seen gave people good reason to stay away and that’s exactly what the gunslinger craved. He didn’t want people to get close to him. He feared attachments and anyone, who knew his story, knew why. A heart wrenching account of frontier life gone so terribly wrong… even Athena had fallen for his deception.

However, there was another reason why Larabee needed to keep people at a distance. An intention so deeply buried in his subconscious that even Chris didn’t recognize it. The shadow the woman had seen last night in his mind had been all too brief but it was enough… But, I am… just not that strong… I cannot… "I should not have spoken," she turned away and tried to gather her clothing again. "I have no right…"

His strong arms stopped her hands as they searched for the clothes. He couldn’t let her go… Not now!

She gazed at his fingers then slowly traced his lips to his face. "I had no right to ask this. I am sorry. I will leave you now… I must seek out he who sees. It is my purpose."

Fear! There was still fear in her eyes…

It took every once of strength Larabee could muster but he beat down the lump in his throat.

They simply stood and looked at one another, yet a thousand words were spoken in their eyes.

Being able to recognize other people’s weaknesses had saved the gunslinger’s life more times than he cared to admit. Over the years, he had fine-tuned his senses. He had learned to see and hear things that few people could. And, right now, Chris could hear the deception in her voice. "Your spirits haven’t called you… have they?" he challenged. "You’re… running away…"

His words surprised her but she was determined to stay focused. "You have promised to return to your village. There is nothing left here, for me to do," she said hurriedly. "I must seek out he who sees. It is my purpose…" she repeated, pulling her hands free. She looked at him defiantly then turned from his searching eyes.

Chris quickly wiped his hand across his damp face. "You’re lying…" he accused gruffly.

"I must go," she tried to move past him.

"You’re afraid," he raised his voice.

She turned to leave then stared at him coldly as he blocked her path. "I must go…"

Chris heard the quiver in her voice again and he stepped back. What else could he say or do? Why was she afraid?

The woman stared at him.

Folding one arm across his bare chest, he raised his other hand to his lips and stroked them gently as he thought. He narrowed his eyes suspiciously. This wasn’t the Athena he knew. She’d uncovered a weakness. And, as much as it hurt him, Chris couldn’t understand why she was afraid to dig further… get everything out in the open where it couldn’t hurt as much. That’s what his Athena would do!

There was something going on and the gunslinger felt compelled to find out what it was. "You just spent the last five days digging things out of my head, Athena," he recounted slowly. "You asked me questions that you knew I didn’t want to hear… pushed me, till I gave you the answer that you needed."

Continuing to look at the woman, he rubbed his forehead in frustration and threw his arms haphazardly into the air. "You’ve learned more about me in the past few days than anyone ever has… All my secrets… ALL my secrets," he took a deep breath as he let his arms sink to his sides. "Why are you afraid?" he whispered sorrowfully, as his eyes threatened to water again.

Athena’s eyes slowly closed. I cannot… Please, I cannot…

Receiving no clear signal that she’d even heard him, Larabee decided to try another approach. He swallowed hard. "Why don’t you ask me how I can live like this…? Why don’t you try to make things better for me… show me how to accept." Chris moved closer to the woman and took a deep breath. "Can you tell me how to… let someone close…" his own words drew his breath away. He turned from her watchful eye as his long buried feelings came rushing to the surface one more.

The emotions Athena had read in his face were reflections of her own. She tried to shake off uncontrollable feelings as she headed for the door but nothing seemed to make her struggle any easier. He was right… She was afraid.

Not afraid of telling him another truth he probably didn’t want to hear. Not even afraid to help him face down his own denial.

But afraid to…

Taking hold of the doorknob, she searched the texture of the wooden portal, desperately trying to find words to speak. It was no use… she couldn’t restrain her own…

Bracing one hand on the doorframe, Athena licked her lips, took a breath and quietly revealed her thoughts to him. "The love that you feel for your wife is deeper than any I have ever known, Christopher. You pledged to her, your soul… and your spirit died when she past from this world… I do not know of any words that can ever free you from the burden of that loss."

Athena’s voice broke and Larabee glanced up, only to witness her fight for control. He felt her turmoil as all manner of emotions fought for dominance within his own mind and body. He wasn’t prepared for what he heard next.

"Your love is beyond eternal… and not even your pain can quell the everlasting devotion that still burns so brightly within your heart." Tears grew in the woman’s eyes and she took another deep breath. "Your longing is unyielding… and unending." Turning the handle, Athena straightened her stance slowly then moved through the threshold. "Oh, how I envy you so…" she whispered as she left

Chris watched her disappear into the pre-dawn shadows, as a tear rolled down his cheek. He realized, all too clearly, what he had just heard. So much truth… so much pain.

But, not all of it was his…

Continue

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