THE CUR: Fallen Angel
Follows The Cur, Vin's Dog and Lucky.
I asked for a sign, Lord, and you sent Vin this dog. I suppose you sent the dog for all of us, to save Vin, but at the beginning that was hard to see.
God---dog, it is a riddle isn't it? Like the blackness of the crows in broad daylight.
When I came out of the church that morning, there she was, sitting at the base of the steps like she was waiting for me, and I was late. I spoke to her, and she got up and moved on. Gaunt and hollow eyed, the color of a copper cooking pot. I imagine if she got a little better care, her coat would shine. That was at the very start of summer, when the early mornings were cool and clean and fresh with the beginnings and endings of things.
We were just really getting settled in, the seven of us. Ezra and Nathan were even starting to appreciate each other, although it was easier for Ezra to appreciate Nathan than vice versa. I believe Ezra got off to a poor start, and he's having to work terribly hard to live that down. Vin, of all people, seems to give him more credit than the rest of us, but Vin seems to give everyone the benefit of the doubt. Look what he did for me when I had that trouble with the Pinkerton man. Maybe that's what injustice does to a man. I hope he doesn't regret his faith in us.
My father pretty much cast dogs into the same category as heathens; heathens being anyone whom the good Lord doesn't see fit to save when the world comes to an end. My father had a narrow view of good and evil, black and white, Christians and non. I told Vin that dog was a fallen angel, come to keep him company, and he laughed in his quiet way, and wondered where an angel was going to lead him?
Right through the pearly gates, I told him.
Probably be pushin' me through the gates of hell, he said.
He is convinced he's going to Purgatory. We've had some talks about it, late at night, when his tongue is loosened by whiskey and Chris is passed out drunk. I wish I could convince him he's a good man, but he tells me that the things he's done in the past couldn't be forgiven. I don't know, nor do I want to know what he means by that, Lord, but if you could give him some peace of mind, it'd be an answer to my prayers.
That dog seemed to give him peace. He didn't speak of her to me, but you could sense that he and she were connected in a way that the others of us weren't. Of course, the more you speak of such things, the more cloudy they become.
When she gasped her last breath, I was truly afraid that Vin might die, too.
After the gunfight, after the firing of the last shot, after the dog had saved Vin, after Chris shot the gunman who killed her, I picked her up in my arms, and Lord, I heard you so clearly it frightened me.
Death is fleeting, Josiah, a hero lives forever.
She was bleeding mightily, the deep redness blending with the metallic glow of her coat in the setting sun. I held her in my arms, and prayed that you would save them both, but most of all, Vin. Not just his body, but his heart. Don't destroy his heart with grief for what he can't change. Don't destroy us, or let us destroy what we have made here between us. Help us, Lord. Help us all.
I buried her up near the treeline. You can see town from there, just barely. Mostly it's a quiet place where the wind blows free, where you can hear wolves howl at night and see the sun come up in the morning. It's a place that is a border between the town and the wild places. Vin would like it here. I'll bring him up here and show it to him later, when he's feeling better. When his heart isn't so close to his eyes, and he can hold his wall together.
Death is fleeting, but a hero lives forever.
Was that Vin's voice, or Yours?
END
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