Vin walked out of Nettie's house into the dark summer night. Being back with Nettie was such an incredible relief he felt like punching the air and whooping his delight. With his arms full of groceries though, and the neighborhood full of ears, he kept his enthusiasm to himself and silently thanked God for answered prayers.No one was around as he walked the short distance to his building and up to his apartment. When he went to slide his new key into his new deadbolt, he saw that someone had begun repairing the gouges on his doorframe with wood putty. Lou probably. He shook his head but smiled as he let himself into the apartment.
He stood for a moment, not shutting the door completely yet. He'd left a light on against the earlier evenings and he looked around, reassuring himself that he was safe and alone. Once he was sure, he shut the door and turned the locks, and set his grocery bag on the kitchen counter to empty it.
Nettie had packed cans of soup, boxes of macaroni and cheese, bread, butter, peanut butter, cheese and crackers, lemon coffee cake, and best of all, a fresh quart of milk and a can of Hershey's chocolate syrup to go with it.
He loved Nettie.
When that was done, he considered what to do next. Watch TV and drink some root beer, or take a painkiller and go to bed.
Take a painkiller, take a shower and go to bed. That would be the challenge. He considered going to bed without the shower, but he wanted to get it out of the way, taking the first shower in his apartment since the attack. He needed that over and done with.
His duffel bag was still near the front door and he dragged it into his bedroom to empty his clothes and put them away. Toward the bottom of the bag he found his bathrobe, fresh and clean - and clean. He didn't remember bringing it to Chris' place but it got there somehow because here it was back. Clean.
He stared at the robe for awhile, holding it in his hands. It was the last piece of clothing he'd had on before the attack. It was the first piece he'd put back on afterward. That must mean something, some greater cosmic significance. Nothing came to mind though. He just knew he wanted to take a shower and wash the hot day and the bad memories away. His back and his ribs hurt and he wanted to take his painkillers, take his shower, and get some sleep in his own bed for a change.
Slowly, Vin changed into his pajama bottoms and t-shirt and put his other clothes aside to wear again tomorrow.
After a moment's consideration, he took Chris' shirt with him and left his bathrobe crushed in the bottom of his duffel bag.
+ + + + + + +
Nettie didn't throw JD out of her house, so he followed her into the kitchen and sat at the table while she grumpily made lemonade. She didn't say anything but every time she had him in her sights, she huffed an aggravated breath at him.
If it was Buck doing that, JD would be huffing back at him, but not Nettie. Three people in the world JD knew better than to poke at was Nettie, Josiah, and Chris. So Nettie huffed, and JD waited, and when the lemonade was ready she served it up like a waitress having a bad day.
He figured she knew what happened at the restaurant, and he wanted to talk to her about it, but he didn't want to take the chance that she didn't know and be the one to bring it up to her. But something had been storming back and forth across his brain since he found out he knew one of Vin's attackers. He wanted to talk to somebody about it.
Nettie took her own lemonade and the chair across from JD.
"This is good lemonade." He tried.
"As good as the lemonade at Inez's?" She asked archly.
"Uhhh...ohh...um..." Caught and trapped, JD didn't know what to say. He pushed his hair back from his forehead and Nettie's demeanor changed immediately.
"What happened to your hand?"
"Oh, that?" JD looked at the deep red welt Inez had inflicted on him. "Inez was teaching me a lesson."
"What'd she use? A carving knife?"
"A straight edge ruler."
"Hmmph." Nettie's attitude changed back to annoyed. "Your hand isn't where I'd have used it."
JD figured maybe he deserved that. He said as much to Nettie.
"What lesson was it exactly that Inez taught you?" She asked.
"How somebody -." JD had to take a deep breath to finish the sentence. "How somebody could be attacked when they didn't want to be." He drank some more lemonade. "It coulda been me."
"About time you came to that realization."
"I don't mean Vin coulda been me. I mean - I knew - I know - one of the guys who attacked him. We're the same age. We lived on the same street. We used to hang out sometimes. I've been thinking that maybe there's not that much difference between me and him. Maybe he turned left when I turned right. Maybe - Nettie, if I'd turned left instead of right, I coulda been one of the ones who attacked Vin."
"And what do you think about that?" Nettie asked.
"I think I don't like myself very much right now."
+ + + + + + +
Vin turned the shower water on.
Then turned it off again.
He should've put a chair under the front door knob maybe. But no, he had the deadbolt now, that was even better than a chair. Nobody could get into the apartment.
He turned the water on again.
Then turned it off again.
He should've put a chair under the bathroom door knob maybe. But no, if nobody could get into the apartment, nobody could get into the bathroom.
He turned the water on again.
Then turned it off again.
What if they didn't come in through the door? What if they came in through the -
Through the what? The rational part of his mind asked. The furnace grate?
He laughed at himself a little for letting his imagination run on and turned the water back on.
And took the fastest shower he ever had taken in his life.
After he put his pajamas on, he opened the door just a crack and had a look around before leaving the bathroom. He was tired, the latest painkiller was kicking in, so he made a quick circuit of the front room, checking locks and turning off fans. He'd told Chris he'd call him before going to bed, so he did that too. When he got the answering machine, he left a quick message.
"Chris - it's me. I'm going to bed. I'll talk to you tomorrow."
Everything was done. He was tired, everything was done, and the only thing left was to go into his bedroom, lay down on his bed, and go to sleep.
Yep, by golly. That was all he had to do. Lay down and go to sleep.
Go to sleep.
And leave himself just about as vulnerable as a person could be.
A few minutes later, there was a chair under the front door knob, and jut for good measure, the pole fan on top of the furnace grate. Now he could go to sleep.
ONE HUNDRED FIVE
The first time Chris listened to the phone message from Vin, Mary listened with him. They had just come back from taking Cowboy for his nightly walk.The second time Chris listened to it, Mary smiled.
The third time he listened to it, she started getting a little huffy. She sent Billy upstairs to get started taking a bath and thought she'd just have a word with her obsessive husband.
When he hit the button to listen to it a fourth time though, Mary got a look at the expression on Chris' face. He wasn't listening to Vin's short message trying to find holes in it or lies or evasions. He wasn't annoyed that Vin had eluded all suggestions, hints and insistings that he stay with them a few more days at least. Chris was worried that Vin was all right and he wasn't going to take a first impression, or second or third for his reassurance.
Mary knew that Chris had three kinds of relationships in his life: family, acquaintance, and make my day. And the passion of the third and the diffidence of the second usually masked the deep affection of the first.
Oh, he'd deny it up and down and right and left and any which way he had to, but Mary knew, to be accepted into Chris Larabee's family was to automatically be taken into a protective boundary of "touch mine, touch me", whether the person was as young and vulnerable as Billy, or as big and strong as Buck. And for Chris, that sense of protectiveness was about as close to saying "I love you" as he'd ever come to anyone other than his wife, and occasionally, when he thought no one was around, to his son.
So instead of being annoyed, Mary walked up behind Chris and wrapped her arms around him.
"Something you want to tell me?" he asked, sounding amused.
"Only that I love you."
"It must be my birthday."
"Billy's going to bed soon." Mary said as Chris turned to face her. "Let me bake you a cake."
+ + + + + + +
Vin woke up, laying on his back, with the covers pushed off and sunlight trying to see through his bedroom curtain. He was surprised that it was daylight, he was surprised that he'd slept all night long. He was surprised that he almost felt normal.
It seemed years ago that last Saturday, the last time he'd woke up in his own bed, he'd woken up in terror and agony, sure that his life was over, or that it should be over even if it already wasn't. This morning, he was actually looking forward to getting up, starting his day. He'd have coffee and coffee cake for breakfast, see what was on TV, catch up on his emails. He'd fixed Josiah's sink and gone to Mass the night before so his day was clear free in front of him.
Sometimes he thought Sundays were as good as Christmas.
He eased himself out of bed and went to the bedroom door, listening out into the front room and kitchen before going in to use the bathroom then going into the kitchen to start the coffee. The apartment was hot and he laughed at himself again when he saw the pole fan where he'd left it standing over the furnace grate, and he set it back in front of the window and turned it on.
The coffee was nearly done and he had a big piece of coffee cake on a plate when the phone rang. Checking the caller ID first, he answered.
"Buck! I just lost a bet with myself. I thought for sure Chris'd be the first one to call me."
"No, I just called over there. Mary said he was still asleep. Something about having too much cake last night."
"Is there a Larabee-Lush cake I don't know about?"
"If there is, I haven't heard about it either...so, how're you doing?"
"I slept all night. So that's a good thing I guess."
"Got any plans for today?"
"Yeah - be alive." Anything beyond that I reckon is just extra." A thought occurred to Vin. "Um - are you calling `cause you found out something? About - about - the -."
"The `big stinkheads'?" Buck finally supplied for him. And Vin had to laugh in spite of the feelings their memory provoked in him. "No, nothing yet. I'm keeping that low profile but ongoing. I'll keep you posted."
"Just tell me before you tell Chris. I don't my first hint to be Chris calling me to make bail for him."
"I will."
+ + + + + + +
Sunday late morning, Inez still hadn't recovered her calm from the scene the night before. She was still mentally heaping abuse on the so-called `friends' of Vin who'd made such a poor display of that friendship barely fifteen hours ago. So when she walked out into the restaurant and saw Ezra in his usual booth, her mood didn't improve. She stood next to his table and glared down at him.
At first it seemed like he was trying to ignore that she was there, but that didn't work and finally he looked up at her.
"I have nowhere else to go."
"What are you talking about?"
"I have very few friends and I seem to be alienating them all at an alarming rate. Even my mother has yet to acknowledge my most recent birthday. I don't like going to unfamiliar restaurants and there is nothing in my pantry at home that I care to eat today. If it makes things easier for you Inez..." He took a deep breath. "...we don't have to know each other anymore. I'll leave if you insist, but I have nowhere else to go."
Inez felt her resolve crumble. She had a soft spot for Ezra. She had a soft spot for each one of the men, in her own way and according to their personalities. Ezra played world-weary and nonchalant but she was expert enough in human nature to know he'd give anything to feel truly a part of his circle of friends. He was part of it, truly and securely, but he didn't feel it or let himself believe it. If his own mother seemed to feel so little concern and affection for him, why would anyone else?
"Would you like to talk about it?" She asked, sitting across from him in the booth.
"Here? Out in the open?" He asked with a mocking tone of voice. "Surely you jest."
"I still have my ruler Ezra. Don't make me resort to torture."
"Yes well..." He looked down at the table. "Perhaps I behaved abhorrently yesterday, even boorishly. I truly consider Vin a very good friend, and I feel privileged to know him. Yet this - this - incident evokes some rather ghastly feelings of ill will and - and -." He seemed to be struggling to choose his words. "...and the necessity of feeling a sense of superiority to his present circumstances. And yet none of that is by my own choice. By a conscious choice. It just blooms there. Like mold. And I wonder if it isn't just my psyche's way of shouting triumphantly `see, you don't belong', as though Vin submitted to his horror simply to be rid of me. There are times I'm certain my mere presence could be enough to drive a heathen to prayer. I have so little in common with Vin, why would he want anything to do with me?"
His confession came to a pause when the waitress served him his Guiness and a sandwich, and he watched until she was out of earshot again.
"My apologies Inez. I daresay I'm not making a bit of sense. And my offer stands - I'll leave if you require. And we don't have to be acquainted with one another any longer if you don't wish."
But for an answer, Inez reached across and affectionately squeezed his hand.
"Ezra, what would I do without you? You stay and when I take my lunch break you can come back and teach me some card games, all right?"
He looked at her with something approaching disbelief until she added, "How else can I win against Buck unless you show me?" and then he smiled.
"It will be my pleasure Inez."
ONE HUNDRED SIX
The more Vin thought about it, the madder he got. Who did Nathan and Rain think they were, spilling his information all over creation? There was one or two things they probably wouldn't want the world to know - cut corners, mild code violations, student complaints that got hushed up, so they were treading on some mighty thin ice.Tomorrow, he thought, Monday, he'd go in there to that clinic and blast them for being so cavalier with his life. He'd let 'em have it but good. He'd get his records from them and tell them plain he didn't require their services anymore, he'd be taking his business elsewhere.
Then he decided tomorrow was too long away so he got into his truck and drove to the campus. He was too annoyed and angry to feel the trepidation he'd been thinking he'd feel driving to work by himself. Maybe he'd be scared later; right now he was too busy reciting his wrongs and cursing Nathan and Rain to notice anything else. They probably wouldn't be at the clinic, not on a Sunday. But he'd get his records from whoever was there and leave a message for the Doctors Jackson so hot it would scorch the paper it was written on.
He was surprised when he walked into the clinic to see Rain there, behind the counter. But not as surprised as Rain apparently was to see him when she looked up to see who had come in.
"Vin-." She stood up and didn't seem to know what else to say.
"I came for my records." Vin growled out. He didn't move any closer to the counter.
"Your records?"
"Yeah. You know - those pages of paper where you write down what's supposed to be private information?"
It looked for a second like Rain was going to say something then she changed her mind. "It'll take a few minutes." She said instead and turned to go into the room behind her where Vin could see file folders on shelves.
While he waited, Vin saw the notice on the wall with contact information for the Health Department in case anybody wanted to register a complaint. And when Rain came back out he was standing there copying down the information. He made sure he held her gaze as he slipped the paper into the pocket of his shirt.
"There's a 75 cent charge per page -." Rain started and Vin cut her right off. Stepping up close enough, he pulled the paper out of her hands.
"Just try and charge me for it."
"You're changing doctors then?" She asked when she'd gotten over her surprise.
Vin's only answer was an aggravated sigh. He turned, intending to walk out the door.
"Vin?"
Even angry, politeness was automatic in him, and he turned back to Rain.
"Just - I hope - if you were thinking of calling - anybody - just - I hope -." After stammering that out, Rain seemed to gain some strength again. "I hope any misunderstanding between us can be handled without bringing anyone else into the picture. Any allegation brought against me could hurt me professionally."
Vin took an overly long moment to answer, letting her wait for it.
"So?"
With that, he turned and left the building and the campus and drove home.
+ + + + + + +
Walking back into his apartment building with his records in his hand, Vin made the conscious decision not to read them. He didn't want to see what Rain & Nathan had written about him. At best, it would only make him more depressed. At worst, it might make him want to turn around and rip their heads off.
He walked past his own front door and went down the hallway to Dr. Hyde's apartment. Really, he didn't want to go to any new doctor, any doctor at all, but he still needed the stitches taken out of his scalp, and he was down to his last few painkillers. He didn't want a doctor, but he needed one. And he trusted Dr. Hyde.
Still, he stood a moment before Dr. Hyde's door before knocking. He trusted Dr. Hyde, but he'd trusted his friends too, hadn't he? And look how most of them had reacted. But then, he thought, maybe he hadn't trusted them. Maybe, ultimately, maybe that was part of the problem. He hadn't trusted his friends and they'd lived up - or down - to his expectations of them.
The door opened and there stood Dr. Hyde, smiling as always and cheerful.
"Vin! It's good to see you. I've been meaning to stop down but I didn't want to intrude. How are you?"
"I - I - I need a new doctor." Vin hadn't meant it to come out that way, but he was standing here about to voluntarily hand over his private misery to one more person. At this rate, he ought to just take an ad out in the News. "I hate to bother you, I know you're retired. I just - I just -."
"Come in, come in." Dr. Hyde said, stepping aside and putting a hand on Vin's shoulder to shepherd him in. He closed the door. "Now tell me, what's this all about?"
Vin looked around the room and not at Dr. Hyde. Maybe it was a mistake. Maybe he didn't really want anybody else to know. Maybe he should just go back to Nathan and Rain and their unprofessional behavior and keep the circle closed of who knew what about him. He kept his records gripped in his hands.
"Take a seat Vin, I'll bring us in some lemonade. We'll talk about this."
He laid a friendly hand on Vin's shoulder as he walked past and after he was gone into the kitchen, Vin sat down in one of the old fashioned, overstuffed chairs. The whole apartment was decorated kind of old fashioned, curved, fringed lampshades, heavy, dark furniture, doilies, hooked rugs, and photographs everywhere. Mrs. Hyde had died apparently just a year or so ago, only a year or so after they'd moved into the apartment, and pictures of her seemed to be everywhere. It made Vin think of the few photographs he had of his parents.
"So, what's going on?" Dr. Hyde handed Vin a tall, narrow glass of lemonade and then sat on the sofa with his own. He sat on the end closest to Vin and leaned forward to hear the story.
"I need another doctor." Vin started. He gripped the glass in his hand but didn't drink.
"What happened to the doctor you had at school? Your friend, isn't he?"
"He was. He was - I overheard him and his wife, she's a doctor too, they were discussing my records out in public, using my name even, with a couple other people. Other friends of mine."
Dr. Hyde lost his friendly expression.
"You're going to report them." He said it, he didn't ask it.
"I will. I might. They know I heard 'em, they know I know who to call about it. I think I'll just let it hang over their heads awhile." Vin looked at the papers in his hand and offered them to Dr. Hyde. "I was thinking, hoping, you could look at my records for me and tell me what I might still need. If you'd maybe be willing to take me on. I know you're retired, but there's not a lot of people I trust anymore. I can come back later if you want." He added when Dr. Hyde took the papers from him.
"Of course not, stay here. I'll look at them now." He set his glass down and began to read them. Vin waited for the look, the gesture, the smallest hint that Dr. Hyde had found the incriminating notations. The sign that would tell Vin that he knew.
But he didn't see any sign. Dr. Hyde read the first page with no change in expression; he turned the page and read the next one, then the next one. Finally though his eyebrows went up and he looked at Vin.
"Vin, there's one thing I have to make clear before I agree to take over your care." He sounded serious and annoyed and Vin couldn't even think what he might be about to say, but it had to be about his attack and it couldn't be good. "I don't care who died, you never, ever go to a funeral in winter when you've got bronchitis."
Since Vin had been expecting some reference to his attack, it took him a few seconds to understand. Then he realized that Dr. Hyde had only been pretending to be annoyed.
"I had to go. Mrs. Potter, Gloria, she's always been real good to me. She's real nice to me. I mean, she told me too that I shouldn't have come out when I was so sick but I could see it meant a lot to her. I woulda rather got pneumonia for a month than not be there for her."
Vin realized he was rambling, babbling almost. He was nervous, waiting and not wanting to talk about the attack. Maybe Dr. Hyde hadn't gotten to that part yet. Maybe that was the last page or something. Maybe he could leave now and take the papers with him and Dr. Hyde would never know.
But then Dr. Hyde flipped the pages closed, set them on his knee, and tapped on the top page, the first one he'd read. In a low tone, in a kind voice that Josiah might use, or even his Dad back when he was alive, Dr. Hyde said to Vin,
"So, you were raped. I thought that was what happened. Why don't we talk about it?"
ONE HUNDRED SEVEN
"Why don't we discuss it?"The horrible truth had been known for too long by too many people, yet Vin had the overwhelming urge to deny it to Dr. Hyde. He wanted to say 'I'm fine, nothing happened.' He wanted to laugh and pretend he'd brought the wrong file. He wanted to throw up. He wanted to take a shower.
"How'd you know?"
"When you came to tell me that Maria had been harassed, you were angry. You said that if you ever saw any of those boys again, you'd pull their arm off and beat them over the head with it. When they beat you, you said 'it was nobody'. That's not a typical answer when a man is attacked in a non-sexual way."
"Oh." Vin didn't know what else to say and drank some lemonade.
"Your friends know?"
"Yeah. Buck - do you know Buck? He's a police detective..." Vin looked up at Dr. Hyde a moment, then back down at the glass in his hand. "He figured it out when he found the - the condoms..."
"Thank God for that. That they used condoms."
Vin only shrugged. He couldn't right now think of anything about the attack to feel thankful for.
"And Chris?" Dr. Hyde asked.
"Honestly, I don't know. I never wanted to ask. I started to tell him, that first night I stayed with him and - I don't k now. He just said that he knew already. I didn't ask how."
"And they're supporting you. Your friends. Most of them, anyway?"
"Yeah." Vin tried to think of how to describe how Chris and Buck had been taking care of him, Buck seeming to find his way in from the edges, Chris circling the wagons and protecting from within. And all that Nettie, Josiah and Mary were doing for him. All of them just being there for him, and with him. How could he have ever thought he was all alone? "Yeah," was all he could say.
"You've been staying with Chris since it happened?"
"Yeah. Chris and Mary. I went back to my apartment yesterday, stayed there last night."
"And how was that?"
"I slept all night. I think the stress must've collapsed me. It's funny, it's like it didn't happen there. I stand in the bathroom, and it's like it's not the same bathroom I was attacked. But any noise outside my front door puts me on alert."
"That's understandable." Dr. Hyde said. "In a college chemistry lab, my partner blew up a beaker. To this day, I will not use glass pots to cook in. But it's good that you can be in your apartment."
"Yeah."
Vin wondered if this was what Dr. Hyde wanted to talk about. It didn't seem like much.
"So, what's Nathan got about me in those pages there? Anything I should be worried about?"
"Well, let's see..." Dr. Hyde scanned the pages again. His eyebrows pulled together in concern. "He's got you on how much Vicodin? How much do you weigh?" He flipped pages. "What's he trying to do, get you addicted? He's got you taking twice as much as you should be. That's not good."
"They always put me to sleep when I'd take 'em. I started taking just one at a time." Vin took the bottle of out of his pocket and handed it to Dr. Hyde, who read the label.
"What in the world was he thinking?" He huffed down at the pages and took a pen out of his shirt pocket to make a note.
"Nathan's been seeming to think - I don't know, almost like I should be hiding under my bed. Not going out in public. I think he thinks I should be -." But Vin couldn't think of the description.
"Catatonic?" Dr. Hyde offered. "Because that's what it seems he was going for. So yes, one of these at a time." He shook the medicine bottle for emphasis and handed it back to Vin. "The muscle relaxant at least is the proper dosage."
"I only took that once or twice. I haven't - needed it - since - since I took it once or twice." Vin didn't want to talk about why he wasn't taking them anymore. And anyway, Mary hadn't given them back.
"OK, let's see what else is here...I should look at the stitches in your scalp, those might be removed today."
"OK."
"OK, so you had some severe anal lacerations. How are those healing?"
Vin opened his mouth, but nothing came out. Fine, he wanted to say fine, but they weren't healing, at least it didn't seem so, and he wanted to find out what he could do, but he didn't want to - there had to be - couldn't they discuss it without actually mentioning it? Sure Dr. Hyde was a doctor, but did he have to use the exact medical words?
"Not - uh - it's just - there's - not a lot - but some - when - I thought - it hurts and - and then - a lot of times -."
"There's blood when you have a bowel movement? Blood and pain?"
Vin only nodded and wouldn't look at Dr. Hyde. He could feel the heat of embarrassment in his face.
"A lot of blood?"
"Depends. Not always." Vin's voice was breath. "Depends on what I ate and how - things - progress..."
"I can recommend a stool softener for you that ought to -."
Vin didn't realize he had squeezed his eyes shut tight until Dr. Hyde spoke to him.
"Vin - it's only words."
"No it's not. It's my life."
"Yes it is." Dr. Hyde agreed after a moment. He didn't sound angry. Vin thought maybe he'd be angry but he didn't seem to be. "I'll get a few things together later on, things that'll help you. I'll write everything down so we don't have to say it out loud. All right?"
"All right." Vin nodded.
"What I'm worried about most right now Vin is that you are recovering, that you have a solid support system, and that your emotional state is stable."
"I am. I do. It is. I'm getting better. At first - at first it was hell and I didn't think I'd survive. But everyday it gets a little better."
"Good." Dr. Hyde smiled, deepening the laugh lines around his eyes. "Come on then into the bathroom where there's better light and I'll have a look at the stitches in your scalp."
ONE-HUNDRED EIGHT
Having the stitches taken out didn't hurt much, more pinches than pain. As Vin sat on a chair in front of Dr. Hyde's bathroom sink, he found himself considering how alike their apartments were in layout, just mirror opposites. Which led him to another thought."Can I ask, if it's not too personal, what's a doctor doing living *here*?"
"You think I should be living in a mansion somewhere? On a beach maybe?" Dr. Hyde sounded amused.
"Yeah, I guess. Nathan and Rain, they got a big house. In their dining room, they got a chandelier that goes up and down by remote control. I just don't see a doctor living in a little one bedroom apartment."
A few more stitches were pulled before Dr. Hyde answered.
"This is the exact apartment my wife and I moved into when we were first married. We did live in a big house later on, while the kids were growing up, with a swimming pool, a tennis court, walk-in closets, five car garage. But after Peggy was diagnosed, all that room, all that convenience, all that *life* just didn't seem to matter. When she found out this apartment was available, we decided to move back in. I retired early and we spent a little over a year and a half here until she died. Since then, I just don't have the inclination to move anywhere else."
"I'm sorry." Vin said, sorry that he asked, sorry that she died. "Both my parents died, when I was a kid. Sometimes it feels like I been taking knocks ever since. There sure have been times I wished I didn't have to leave my apartment." Then he thought that maybe sounded insulting, like he thought Dr. Hyde was goldbricking, but he didn't know how to backtrack without making it worse. But Dr. Hyde didn't sound insulted.
"I'll tell you, it took me a long while to want to leave my apartment after I lost Peggy. And that made me glad we had moved here, all the neighbors are very supportive. Well, that's the last stitch, no signs of infection, looks well-healed. Come on back out into the living room, we'll talk some more."
At Vin's hesitation, Dr. Hyde lifted his hands in reassurance. "Don't worry. Nothing clinical."
Vin nodded and carried the chair he'd been sitting in back to the kitchen. He took his seat again in the front room and drank some more lemonade. Dr. Hyde brought the pitcher in and refilled their glasses.
"I'm sorry about your parents." He said as he resumed his own seat. "How old were you?"
"Five when I lost my Mom. Her appendix ruptured and she went septic." He hoped he was using the right words in front of Dr. Hyde. He must be, because the doctor nodded. "The doctors tried real hard but she didn't make it. My Dad, he had Addison's. He was sick with the flu and working overtime and he had a 'crisis' they said at work." Vin shrugged. "He didn't get to the hospital fast enough. I was fifteen," he added quickly, remembering that was Dr. Hyde's original question.
"My God. I'm so sorry. So you've been let down by the medical profession more than just recently."
"No, no I never thought on it that way." Vin was surprised by the remark. "People die. My parents died." He shrugged again. "I lived."
+ + + + + + +
Chris called Vin's apartment. And got no answer.
"You know, ever since you moved home, you're never there." He grumbled to the answering machine. "Call me."
When he hung up, he turned to the computer in the corner of the family room and in the search engine plugged in 'penalties for breaking patient confidentiality'. When he couldn't make heads or tails of the lists of possible entries that came back, he typed it in a different way but the result was a lot of entries talking about the confidentiality of mental health practitioners which only made him think of Stephen and how things would've turned out so much different if that dumb-ass excuse of a therapist had just -.
"Hi Dad!" Billy rushed into the room and into Chris' lap. "Guess what?! Grandma and Grandpa were at church and they came with us!! They're gonna stay for lunch and then take us to dinner only they said we went to Chuckee Cheese last week so this time we gotta go where the grown ups wanna go do you wanna go to Chuckee Cheese Dad???"
"Probably not Bud. I hate to disappoint you."
"Aaaahhhhhh. Phooey."
Chris grinned at Billy's disappointment, which was short-lived when Cowboy bounded into the room with a squeaky toy and boy and dog raced out the sliding doors to the backyard to play. Orrin came into the family room then.
"Chris. Isn't it too nice a day to be stuck inside?"
& nbsp; "Yeah, I'm just looking up some information on the computer. Trying to look it up anyway. You know the law, right?"
"As the title 'Judge' would imply." Orrin agreed gravely. "What is it you're looking up?" He walked closer and peered over Chris' shoulder to the computer screen.
"*'Can I kill someone for breaking patient confidentiality?'*" He read Chris' question off the Google screen. "Something you'd like to tell me?"
Chris did a fast mental inventory of what Orrin did and did not know about what happened to Vin.
"Last Saturday I took Vin to Nathan & Rain to get patched up after those thugs beat him. Last night we went to Inez's and heard Nathan & Rain talking about it with Ezra and JD. Using Vin's name. There's a lot of things I can do to them, a lot of things I'd *like* to do to them, but I thought legal penalties might hurt them a lot worse."
"Vin isn't here?"
"No, he went home yesterday. He's feeling better, thought he'd try getting around on his own again. It was only a coincidence we went to the restaurant the same time as they did last night. They're lucky they got out of there alive, all four of them. I wanted to rip their heads off."
"Hmm..." Orrin got that thoughtful look Chris thought he must've had in the courtroom when lives were being decided. "You leave this to me." He finally said. "I may have a couple of ideas far worse than death."
ONE HUNDRED NINE
Nettie couldn't help seeing that Vin was not in a happy mood. He sat at her kitchen table, staring hard at the plate that waited the food she was nearly done cooking. He'd set the table at his own insistence but hadn't offered any further help and that was unusual for him. Almost any other time he came to supper at her house, he was constantly either asking what he could do or telling Nettie what he was going to do. That boy could spot a loose floor tile or a sprung paneling nail from ten feet away. And if he saw it, he fixed it.Not now, not that Nettie required service to pay for supper. But his attitude right now worried her.
"Honey?"
And Nettie was happy to see that Vin knew what she was asking without being told.
"I was just thinking about my parents." He told her, lifting his eyes but not his posture from his slump. "Sometimes it just up and sticks me that I'm an orphan. I mean - it's not like it's a surprise or anything. Just sometimes - it sticks."
"That'll keep happening honey, no matter how old you get."
"Why?" He rubbed his face and sighed into his hands.
"Because we're human, and to be human means we hurt."
"Hunh. Tell me what'll hurt Nathan and Rain then. Ezra and JD at least seems like they're reconsidering their opinions. Rain seems colder than a Niagara winter."
"You want me to come to work with you tomorrow?" Nettie asked. She brought the food to the table but instead of waiting for Vin to serve himself the beef stew and mashed potatoes, she ladled them out herself onto his plate. "I can put a freeze on them they'll never get out of."
"I'd love you to come to work Nettie. Gotta warn you though, right now I'm sharing an office with Chris." Vin smiled when he said it.
"Give us a common enemy besides ourselves and Chris Larabee and I will get along just fine." Nettie took her seat and served herself. "Why are you in Chris' office?"
"Our Head of Environmental Services got himself arrested so they threw that in Chris' corn er. He says my being in the office with him makes it easier to get that work done. I think he just prefers somebody to be there to listen to him gripe."
Nettie had to agree.
"I think you're right." Then she added, "Just remember honey, I'm an orphan too."
++++++++++
After dinner with Nettie and ice cream for dessert, Vin went home to find a note taped to his apartment door.
Call me when you get home. R. Hyde.
So Vin went down to Dr. Hyde's apartment and knocked on the door. When Dr. Hyde answered, Vin held up the note.
"Seemed easier than calling." He explained.
"Either is great! Do you want to come in or I can come down to your apartment? I've got those things we were talking about."
"No, I can come in." Vin hoped it sounded like he wanted to make it easier on Dr. Hyde. Really though he preferred to keep all potentially explicit conversation out of his own airspace.
A small brown paper bag waited on the chair Vin had sat in earlier in the day. The medical papers he'd left peeked out of a manila folder on the end table.
"Here's a new prescription for the Vicodin." Dr. Hyde brought it out of the manila folder. "One at a time. And here -." He lifted the paper bag. "I didn't want to make you have to buy these yourself. There's a stool softener in there -." Vin swallowed involuntarily and Dr. Hyde noticed.
"I'm sorry. I know you don't like the words -."
"No, that's OK. It's not like you could call it 'apple dumplings' or something. It is what it is. It's OK." But Vin still felt like throwing up.
"OK." But Dr. Hyde didn't really sound like he believed him. "I also got a topical painkiller, and a container of dietary fiber. You should take a teaspoon in a glass of water three times a day. It'll also help lower your cholesterol." He added brightly which made Vin smile.
"Thanks for getting all this for me. You're right - I never would've bought it myself. At least not all at the same store at the same time." He took the bag and the prescription and asked over the lump of emotion in his throat. "How much do I owe you?"
"The promise that you will always come to me if you need anything. Anything."
And the lump got so big almost all Vin could do was nod.
"I promise."
+++++++++++
Vin drove himself to Chris' house. He didn't know if they'd be home or not but he wanted to go for a drive and he needed to have a destination.
Apparently they'd just got back from somewhere themselves, Chris, Mary and Billy were just getting out of the truck when he pulled in behind them. He might've kept going but he knew there was no disguising the rattle of his truck and they'd know he hadn't stopped.
"Hey Vin!" Billy ran up to him first. "GUESS WHAT?"
"What?" Vin tried to match the enthusiasm.
"We went to dinner with Grandma and Grandpa only I wanted to go to Chukee Cheese but we couldn't on account'a we went there last time and this time we had to go where the grownups wanted t'go and we went to this really dumb place until GUESS WHAT?? I got to throw peanut shells all over the floor!!!!"
"Well that sounds like a great place to have dinner." "Yeah!! I hope we get to go there all the time!!! It was even better than Chukee Cheese!"
Mary greeted him next with a hug.
"Did you have dinner? C'mon inside and I'll make you something."
"Oh no. I'm fine. I had dinner - with Nettie. I just came by to show y'all I'm surviving."
"Without us." Mary smiled. "I've got some ice tea brewing in fridge. Come on in for that at least."
"I will."
Then he was faced with Chris, who only waited for the answer to his unasked question as Mary and Billy went inside.
"I'm fine. I am. I'm tired but I'm okay."
"Good. Let's go in and have some ice tea."
"Can we stay out on the porch? I can't stay very long. I want to get to bed early so I can be ready for going to work tomorrow." And that was the whole truth. "And I just need to be outside. I been inside way too long now."
"Sure, come on."
So Chris and Vin sat on the low top step of the porch and didn't say anything for awhile.
"I asked Dr. Hyde to take over taking care of me." Vin finally offered. "He said he'd d o it. He said - a lot of things."
"Useful things?" Chris asked.
"Yeah. He's nice. He did his best to make it easy for me to talk about. He took the stitches out." Vin gestured to the back of his head.
Mary brought out two glasses of ice tea and didn't say anything about them coming into the house. After she'd gone back in, Vin asked,
"So, what's a Larabee Lush Cake made out of?"
"What?"
"I was talking to Buck this morning. He said he called here but Mary said you were still sleeping 'cause you'd had too much cake last night. I was just wondering if it was a Larabee Lush Cake."
Chris blushed so dark so completely, even his ears turned red. Vin choked on his swallow of ice tea.
"Oh - whoa - sorry! Too much information!! Guess I can't be snarking y'about Viagra anymore!" But he couldn't help grinning as Chris took a grip on his glass so hard it looked like he might break it and drank most of the tea in one long swallow. "What'll you pay me not to tell Buck?" "I'll let you live."
"Ha. You're lucky y'caught me in a good mood, otherwise it'd be a hard sell saying which was worth more to me. Birthday parties are gonna be a whole lot more fun from now on, I can tell you that."
Chris grumbled something into his almost empty glass and shook his head.
"Thanks for making me laugh." Vin said. "I've been needing that."
Chris gave him a look, maybe checking out that he was serious. But then he smiled.
"You're welcome."
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