ATF Universe
Disclaimer: None of the characters in this creation belong to me, just a big case of the I wants.
Comments: This is a little different, really short and kinda dumb...but see, Judy mentioned a certain undergarment.
V: Goddamn Buck Wilmington anyway. I was perfectly happy just sittin' there at my desk, bein' real quiet, not botherin' nobody-not even Ezra, just sittin' an' fillin' out reports and then he had to bring over that fuckin' catalogue. Pointin' out this here and that there, like I really needed to see any of it. Oh Vin, he says with that fuckin' grin he's got like he just ate somethin' sweet and gooey, and jus' looky what they got here in this section, he says...I knew I shouldn'ta looked. I knew it.An' then he just had to go and suggest somethin' 'bout it...Oh Vin, wouldn't it be a kick if...and wouldn't it just be so unexpected if...and wouldn't Chris just...Shit, that was so like him, plantin' them ideas, pesterin' me 'bout it all week. Wouldn't let it go, just kept at me and at me and aww hell. Why th' hell I ever listen to him in the first place, why th' hell Chris had t' go and tell him 'bout us anyway, so what if Buck'd already guessed. Him and that catalogue and now look where I am...It's all his damn fault. All of it, an' I'm tellin' him so if'n he ever shows up, the fucker.
B: Get the hell off th' road, you asshole. Shit, don't anybody know how t' drive anymore? Okay Buck, calm down, take it slow, you're gonna wind up in an accident yourself. He's fine, he's just fine and you know it. Christ, Chris ain't gonna be happy 'bout this, wonder if he's picked up his messages yet, prob'ly shouldn't 've left it for him, just should've waited to t'tell him myself...Maybe I can get Vin home 'fore Chris does, that'd be best, I think...God-damn that boy, anyway. He knows better'n than t' drive around not wearin' a seat belt, what th' hell was he thinkin'? Not thinkin', that's what. Him and JD, think they're fuckin' invincible..God, he best be okay...Goddamn that boy. C'mon light, stay green, stay green.
C: Please just shut up, will this meeting ever end? He's just going on and on, and here I thought Ezra liked to talk incessantly, this guy beats him hands down...puh-leeze, just shut the fuck up already, will ya?
V: Oh Christ, here she comes, still smilin' at me...shit, I can feel my face burnin' hot all the way t' my ears, I hate when I do that, hate it. Askin' me if'n I'm alright..yeah right, I'm fuckin' fine, ma'am. Jus' love layin' here wearin' next t' nothin', that fuckin' Buck anyway...Oh, man, I hate when they stick that needle in there, shit that hurts, shit...Okay, okay, gettin' numb...s'okay, no, nope s'okay...ooh, can't watch her do that...least I ain't feelin' no pain...well, 'less y' don't count the pain a sittin' here embarrassed as all get out...Oh, that's funny...sittin' here 'barrassed...bare assed..sittin' here bare-assed...bare ass..Geeze, I ain't sayin' that out loud am I? Jus' shut th' hell up, Tanner, 'fore ya start to soundin' like a goddamn mental case...sittin' here bare-assed...
Oh Christ, I'm goin' t' fuckin' pieces, what th' hell else they stick in me, anyways?
An' where th' hell is Bucklin...the snake. Goddamn that Buck, anyways.
B: Christ I hate this place, been here so many times, seems like. Half of 'em 'cause of Vin alone, I'm sure. Boy can sure get himself into trouble, that's a fact. Okay, let's ask again here at the desk, they sure are busy tonight. I do recognize this woman I think, okay Buck, big winning smile for her...Okay lady, tell me what I need to know. Yep, Tanner, Vin, that'd be him. God I hate the smell of hospitals, that antiseptic smell.
Look at all these folks. Must've been a full moon tonight, never seen so many people in an emergency room. Ooh, look at that guy, okay Buck, don't stare...oh man, that's gotta hurt bad. Okay, okay, settle down, it's okay. Vin's okay, thank God. They're just cleaning him up, got it. Good, can see him in a minute, that's good, calm down Buck, everthing's fine. Okay, I'll just sit, wait over there,...let's see, any empty seats...
C: Finally home...should check the messages...What? No Vin, shit, not again. Okay, where're my keys?
V: Man, I hate this...jus' wanna get on home, wanna...home...God, I shoulda asked Buck t' bring me some sweats, sure as hell don't wanna leave like this...Like this, shit, him and that fuckin' catalogue...What th' hell time is it, I wonder?...How long I been layin' here, anyways?...Oh, thank God m' leg don't hurt no more right now, least there's that, least it don't feel like it's just been cut off, no more...Fact, can't much feel nothin' right 'bout now...kinda nice, floatin'...ooh, lookit that ceilin' would ya? Alla them dots...lots of 'em up there...dots...Where th' hell is Buck, the dumb fuck...Buck the fuck, heheh, Buck the fuck got no luck...Oh lordy Tanner, yer gettin' loopy. Ooh lookit, lots and lots of dots...lots of...
Wha's touchin' me?...Oh shit's her, back 'gain. Hunh? What's she sayin'? Why's she smilin' so big...Lord she got some big ol' teeth in her...oh yeah, water, taste's good...shit, remind me to sit up slower next time, did m' head fall off? ...'kay, think I'll lay down 'gain, feelin' touch sick here, yep... Lemme jus' close m' eyes fer minute, then I'll...I'll be okay, jus' restin'...yeah, 'm okay ...oookaaaay... Chriiiissss...
B: 'Bout time...okay, where is...Vin? Oh man, he looks pale...out like a light from the looks of him...got him drugged up pretty good...Where's that nurse with th' doc? Wish they'd hurry th' hell up, I wanna get him out of here to Chris' 'fore Larabee...God, look at th' blood in his hair, geeze, couldn't they clean him up better'n that?...man, that goose egg above his eye looks bad, he'll be lucky t' get it open at all in the mornin'...what else...shit, Tanner, you're a mess...what th' hell were you thinkin' about, no seatbelt?...Okay, where the hell's the damned doctor?
C: Okay, got the keys, out the door...
V: ...hear voices...touchin'...pettin' m' hair...who, who's pettin' m' hair...s' nice...
B: S'okay Vin, relax, jus' relax...ol' Buck's here, go on back t' sleep, that's it. I'll get ya home in little bit, just need th' damn...aah, finally...hmmm, nice lookin' doc ...Okay, Buck, concentrate on what she's sayin'...good, no concussion, that's a good thing...fractured wrist, okay...two stitches above the eye, yup I seen that...several abrasions down left forearm...couple contusions, nothing too serious, good, good...oh man, now that don't sound too good...twelve stitches, deep laceration, upper thigh...didn't hit major artery, you know it doc, he's a lucky man...just missed groin area...ouch, hearin' that's makin' me hurt, too...leg immobile, got it...antibiotics, painkillers...got it...okay, while she's finishin' his paperwork, lemme go call Chris...
C: ...was that the phone?
V: ...
B: Okay, called Chris, that wasn't so bad...give him time t' calm down 'fore I get Vin out there...great, all signed out, now where're his clothes...I know he don't wanna ride in just a hospital gown...okay, found a shirt, socks, boots...now all's I need are his pants...
C: Car accident, goddamn...no seatbelt, that's not like him...'course, neither's losing control of the Jeep, either, he's lucky he hit just a telephone pole, not another car...God, thrown from the driver's seat...Christ, I feel ill...
V: ...mmm...Buck? Buck, that you?...
B: Vin ain't gonna be happy they sliced up his jeans, no how...nice o' that nurse t' go find me some hospital scrubs for him t' wear...surprised with as many people they got in the ER, she knew just who I's talkin' 'bout needin' some pants, though...nurse musta got a little attraction for the boy, smilin' as big as she was when I asked, practically jumped up when I said we's leavin'...okay, let me get him dressed and outta here...oh good, nurse's comin' right back t' help me with him, that'll make things easier...
C: Settle down, Larabee, he's fine...he's fine...
V: Aah no, don't...don't wanna sit up...lemme sleep...
B: C'mon Vin, that's it, lemme slip off this blanket they got on you...ohmigod, you gotta be shittin' me...that boy went and done ordered it...not in a million years did I think he'd go on and actually do it...good Christ, lookit the grin on that nurse's face, man o' man she got some big teeth in there, looks like she wants t' take a chunk right out o' him...'course, can't say's I blame her, look at him, mighty appetizin' t' me too like that, must've been intendin' on surprisin' ol' Chris, lucky dog...okay Buck, quit starin' an' help the poor boy out...gotcha Vin, lemme fix that gown, get ya somewhat decent 'til I get ya properly dressed an' all...heehee, some surprise...
C: C'mon Buck, hurry up...
V: Noo, cold...I'm cold...aah, my arm...hurts...don't wanna sit, wanna lie down...Buck?
B: Yeah Vin, that's it, arm in here...shirt's on...ooh, sorry, didn't mean 't bump that wrist, bet that smarts somethin' awful...okay, socks on... whoa, no pard, don't lie back...thank God that nurse's helpin', I'd never be able to handle him like this...what they give him anyway?...Okay, scrubs're up, gotcha covered, Vin...heehee, boy, you ain't never gonna live this one down...aah, wheelchair's here, okay...got it, okay, got meds, needs to see doc next week or sooner if swellin', redness, odor, yep know this by rote...alright Tanner, just gotta get inta th' truck...and away we go...
C: Should be here soon, c'mon Buck...
V: ...oh man, m' head's spinnin'...movin'?...Buck?...it is Buck, goddamn, if I didn't feel like I been stepped on by a bull, I'd kill 'im...fuckin' catalogue, all his fault...
B: What the hell's he rambling 'bout? Kill me? What th' hell I do?...Catalogue? Ah, the catalogue... hehe, yeah Vin, it sure looks mighty fine t' me...Chris's gonna love it...everyone in the ER did, that's for sure...don't know I've ever seen a finer sight than your bare ass in that electric blue thong, sure know how t' pick 'em out, boy...never thought you'd order it for real...much less wear th' thing...yep, Chris's gonna love it...
C: That a truck I hear? Thank God...
V: Fuckin' Buck...all his fault...thong...fuckin' g-string got me so distracted...God, I hurt...what th' hell happened?...pullin' th' thing outta my ass...drivin' t' Chris'... distracted...corner too fast...thing's up m' ass...gonna kill that Buck...all his fault...stupid thong...Chris? that you? Thank God, the ranch, I'm at the ranch...soft bed...feels so good...just wanna sleep...
B: Hee...th' look on Chris' face when he saw that g-string on that boy...wish I had me a camera...Yep, just knew Chris 'd love it...
End
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