"Sorry you didn't shoot her when you had the chance," Vin spat out wearily."Next time," Chris answered in a bitter, tight voice. He gathered the blanket around him, an unconscious gesture, caused by the involuntary shiver that coursed down his spine at the thought of Ella Gaines.
Vin eyed Chris carefully, a lump rising in his throat at seeing him as he appeared now, sickly and defeated, not the proud man who had been his best friend. Words froze on his parched, cracked lips. He turned on his heel and started back down the boardwalk toward his waiting horse, shoulders slumped with exhaustion and something else that he couldn't quite put a finger on.
"Vin! Vin!Wait!" Chris called out stridently.
Vin halted his progress on the wooden walkway, his heart constricting painfully at Chris's voice. Still strong and authoritative as always, it nevertheless held something different this time as it called out to the young tracker. Hell, if Vin didn't know any better, he'd almost swear it was something like....fear. 'Not likely,' he frowned to himself, shaking his head. 'The great Chris Larabee afraid? Not in this lifetime,' he snorted and continued down the walk.
Chris's breath caught in his throat as he watched Vin stop, then start walking away from him again. 'No Vin, no. Don't leave....' he begged silently. Still weak and recovering from the gunshot wound inflicted by Handsome Jack, he pulled himself out of the chair, blanket sliding to the ground, forgotten. He stood shakily and struck out after Vin. The blanket tangled around his feet, and the normally graceful man, movements made clumsy by the recent injury, collapsed to the walkway heavily. "Vin! Vin! Hold up!"
"Damnation!" the tracker cursed silently to himself as he stopped again and spun around angrily.
"What...." he began.
"Help me with him Vin," Nathan asked, as he lowered Chris's limp body to the boardwalk.
"What happened to him Nate?" Vin asked worriedly, as he ran back to Chris's side.
"Feet got tangled up in the blanket. And knowin' him, he tried to do too much too soon," Nathan replied simply, as he examined their leader. "I was coming from behind y'all, and I saw Chris get up and then he started fallin'." He looked at Vin poignantly. "Glad I was there to catch him."
"Me too," Vin said with a twinge of guilt.
"Help me get him back to the clinic, will ya Vin?"
"Sure thing Nate," Vin said, and grabbed Chris's legs, while the healer cradled the injured man's torso. The two awkwardly made their way up the flight of stairs to Nathan's rooms, then deposited Chris on one of the clinic's beds.
Vin hovered in the background while Nathan carefully re-checked Chris's healing wound and looked the man over.
"No harm done," he said with relief to Vin. "He just needs to rest some more, I told him it was too soon to be up and around," he complained. "Damn but he's a stubborn one. Don't know who's worse, you or him," he finished with a wry grin.
"Don't know either Nate," Vin rasped back, glancing over at Chris unhappily. "You sure he's gonna be all right?"
"Yeah, long as he stays put," he assured. He looked up at Vin suddenly. "Vin, you mind sittin' with him for a while? I was on my way over to Mrs. Potter's to get more supplies."
"Sure thing Nate, I'll sit with him. Take as long as you need."
"Thanks Vin. Don't mind if I do," the healer replied with a sly smile. "Maybe I'll get a bite to eat while I'm out. I'll bring you both back some food, too. See ya in a while."
Vin nodded to Nathan and settled into the bedside chair. They had come so close to losing Chris at that crazy women's ranch. And then minutes ago when he had turned around to see him slumped in Nathan's arms on the boardwalk, it brought all the horrible images flooding back. He stood and leaned over Chris, watching the slow rise and fall of his chest, mesmerized by the movement, relieved to watch as the gunmen took each breath. His mind whirled with activity, belying his calm exterior. Just make sure he's all right, 'til Nathan comes back, and then leave. And never look back.
He lowered himself back into the chair with a soft groan. He'd been in the saddle for over a week, combing the countryside for that bitch, Ella. He was so tired, his body ached and his head hurt. He rubbed at his temples trying to ease the tightness and dull blossom of pain away. But it was no use. He'd carried this ache around with him for so long that it had become a part of himself. It started in his head, flowing down to center around his chest. And it only seemed to get worse when he'd first laid eyes on Ella, flaring up to a sickening pain that threatened to bowl him over when Chris had told him that he was staying on with Ella after their job was finished. He had almost become physically ill when Chris had uttered those simple words. It still caused him to break out into a cold sweat when he thought about what had almost come to pass.
"Don't dwell on it Tanner,' he scolded himself gruffly, just like he always did when he got too close to puzzling it out. Feelings were a dangerous thing for a man in his position. Better to just bury them and move on. He'd lived like that his whole life, and he'd done pretty good for himself. Cept for that whole Eli Joe business, he remembered suddenly, grinning humorlessly. But still, he'd done just fine, until he'd met the eye of the black-clad gunslinger, and helped to rescue Nathan, that day, just over two years ago. And now it was time to move on. He was going to shut all these strange thoughts and feelings away and run. Yep, he answered himself silently, that's the answer. I'm gonna just forget I ever knew anybody named Chris Larabee. Nathan gets back here, I'm gone. If I'm lucky, Chris'll still be asleep and I can just slip away.
Content with his plan, he allowed his heavy eyelids to close. He slouched down in the chair, asleep in seconds.
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Chris's eyes flew open and he looked around the room frantically. 'Nathan's clinic. Nathan's clinic, not Ella's,' he repeated to himself over and over again as he tried to slow down his runaway breathing. He'd had the nightmare again, where he was tied up, trapped in Ella's house, watching helplessly as Vin was gunned down, shot in the chest by one of Ella's henchmen. God, he wanted to kill the woman with his bare hands when he thought about the things she had done and what had nearly happened to him and the rest of the seven.
Now that he was calmer, he shifted in the bed, trying to remember how he'd gotten here. Last thing he remembered, he was sitting on the boardwalk talking to Vin.
"Vin," he whispered hoarsely, seeming to sense the younger man's presence in the room. He turned slightly and saw Vin, slouched in the bedside chair, sound asleep. He pushed himself up in the bed, leaning back against the soft pillow, affording himself a better view of the sleeping sharpshooter. His eyes travelled the length of Vin's lean body, coming to rest on his hands, each hanging loosely off the arms of the chair. He studied the hand nearest to him, scrutinizing it closely. He'd seen Vin's hands plenty of times, usually holding his mare's leg or a shot glass, but he'd never really looked at them. He didn't know what was so different about this time, but here he was, in the quiet of Nathan's clinic, studying Vin's hand, as if it was a work of art. And in a way, it was. He stared at the smooth tanned skin, and the long, slender fingers. He noticed, as if for the first time how delicate and fragile the bones in Vin's hand seemed. Without realizing it, he leaned forward, reaching out to touch Vin's hand. The warm flesh instinctively folded around Chris's own hand and the gunslinger brought the younger man's hand toward his lips.
"Jesus!" he hissed, dropping Vin's hand with a start. "What the hell am I doin'?" he whispered in shock.
Vin's eyes opened in surprise at the abrupt movement. He immediately straightened in the chair. "Chris, what....you need somethin'?" he asked in confusion.
"Uh, yeah, how about some water," Chris asked, trying to cover up his embarrassment. I must be losin' it, he thought to himself. I think I was just about to kiss Vin's hand. Nathan must be givin' me too much laudanum. he said, trying to convince himself the opiate was to blame for his strange behavior.
"Here ya go, Chris," Vin said, handing the tin cup to the older man. Their hands touched briefly as the cup was exchanged, and Vin pulled back sharply.
"You okay Vin?"
"Uh, y-yeah," Vin said somewhat shakily. What the hell was that? he wondered silently. He'd felt a sudden tingling sensation at Chris's touch. > This is gettin' way too weird.
He cleared his throat and Chris looked at him expectantly.
"Somethin' on your mind Vin?"
The sharpshooter blew out his breath. "Yeah, there is. Soon as Nathan gets back, I'm headin' out."
"Don't blame you a bit, too nice of a day to be cooped up in here with me." He didn't know why, but it made him a little sad to think that Vin didn't want to spend time with him. But he could hardly blame the younger man after what had happened with Ella. He knew it would take Vin some time to forgive him for his harsh words and callous actions. But it hurt all the same to see the bridge that had built up between the two of them over it. "You gonna take JD fishin' today? Good day for it."
"No, I ain't," Vin said tersely shaking his head. Chris still didn't get it. "I mean I'm ridin' out. For good." He paused, letting the words sink in.
"What?"
"Time for me to move on Chris. Maybe head to Tascosa, maybe go someplace else."
"Thought we were headin' to Tascosa together," Chris said, then immediately regretted it.
"Thought we were, too," Vin said quietly. He sagged back against the chair momentarily, then straightened himself again. "But things change. And I'm ridin' out."
"Just like that?" Chris said bitterly.
"Yep, just like that," Vin shot back. "Matter of fact," he said, standing up. "if it's all the same with you, I'd just as soon be leavin' now. Nathan'll be along soon, you'll be fine 'til he gets here, won't you Larabee?"
Chris flinched at Vin's use of his last name. 'God it was like talking to a stranger,' he thought to himself with despair. He looked at the hooded eyes, the stiff stance and stand-offish demeanor of the tracker, and he suddenly got angry. Sure he'd made one hell of a mistake with Ella, but he was trying, wasn't he? And hadn't he paid for his stupidity? Just who the hell was Vin to be such a stubborn cuss about this whole thing?
"Fine, just leave, get the hell out of here," he snapped. "Just like you did with Charlotte. Seems like you're pretty damn good about running away."
Vin's blue eyes blazed. "Just what the hell is that supposed to mean?" he said in a low, deadly tone. "You're the one that was runnin' out on me with that bitch Ella! Thought you were gonna ride to Tascosa with me! Seems like it was pretty easy to forget all about that, first time some woman comes along willin' to show you a good time!"
Chris was off the bed in a heartbeat and lunged at Vin. Although still weak and shaky, he managed to knock the smaller man down, plowing into him and driving both of them to the floor. Each fist grabbed a handful of Vin's shirt and twisted.
"You son of a bitch!" he spat out. "You left me, Tanner!" he hissed, enraged. "Or have you forgotten about Charlotte already? And what happened to Tascosa when you met her? Was she gonna help you clear your name? Or were you more interested in getting laid at the time?"
Chris's green eyes glittered, boring into the younger man, just inches away from him. He gave the former bounty hunter a sardonic smirk. "You know, you never did tell me. Was she worth it Vin?
"Wouldn't know about that," Vin muttered, trying to pull away from Chris's grasp, but failing. Even in a weakened condition, Chris Larabee was a strong man. So he sat there on the floor, face to face with the gunslinger, when all he really wanted to do was just leave, get as much distance between Four Corners and himself as possible. But Chris wouldn't leave it alone.
"What's that supposed to mean?" Chris asked, intrigued at Vin's surprising response and at the unexplained quickening of his pulse when Vin had briefly struggled to get away from him.
The sharpshooter jerked his face away from Chris's in reply.
"I asked you a question," Chris said evenly, shaking the sharpshooter slightly to emphasize his words.
Vin turned back to Chris, sapphire blue eyes searing him with their pain-filled gaze. "Means I wouldn't know if she was worth it, Chris. Never did nothin' with her like that." He stared at Chris's hands, embedded in the cloth of his red shirt, clutching handfuls of it. "Told you what you wanted to know. And now I'm goin'," he said softly.
"No you ain't Tanner," Chris whispered huskily. "You ain't leavin' me like this."
"What in tarnation is goin' on in here?" Nathan's angry voice burst out behind the two men.
Chris and Vin both jumped in surprise, the older man releasing his tight hold on Vin's shirt.
"Nothin' Nate," Vin answered hurriedly, scrambling to his feet. He held his hand out for Chris, not able to make eye contact with the man.
Chris accepted the hand up, wobbling as he stood.
"Back to bed with you," Nathan ordered with a frown. There was definitely something going on, but he knew both men well enough that they wouldn't say anything until they were ready. He decided to let the matter drop for now. Chris laid back on the bed without protest, but his eyes never left Vin's face. "This ain't finished Vin."
"Seems like it is to me," Vin answered back defiantly.
Chris sat back up. "Damn it Vin! Don't leave yet! I want to talk to you." He stared at the tightly clenched jaw and narrowed, angry blue eyes. A raw burst of cold fear clenched him in the gut, making him say something he hadn't asked of another human being in over three years. "Please?" he whispered, so quietly, that at first Vin and Nathan both thought they had only imagined it. And then Chris's voice sounded again, harsh in its desperation. "Vin, please, will you stay for a few more days? Give me a chance to explain?"
The former bounty hunter's body relaxed, the heat leaving the blue eyes, tension flowing away from his features. He knew what that had cost Chris to say. And he couldn't turn his back on the man now. "Yeah Chris, I'll stay," he agreed. "We'll talk when you're feelin' better, maybe sometime tonight," he promised. "If Nathan says it's all right." He finished his thought silently, But as soon as you're back on your feet, I'm outta here.
"That'll be just fine with me, Vin," Nathan answered. "Come back in a few hours, why don't you?"
"See you then Vin," Chris said, saying his words as a statement and a question at the same time.
The sharpshooter nodded his head and walked out the door with a strange sensation of relief. Right now, soaking in a hot tub with a bottle of whiskey sounded like a really good idea to him.