Kicking at a small flat stone, Buck Wilmington tried to get his anger under control. He knew when he followed Chris Larabee out of camp to confront him, that getting his old friend to open up would be about as easy as picking up a porcupine. Seemed like forever since that day when Chris and Vin were standing in the street together, waiting for the land deed trial to end. The time spent with the wagon train was full of tension, violence and death. Vin Tanner had run off with a married woman, Mary turned down a marriage proposal, and the Seven were victorious against Dick O'Shay. Now, Buck was determined to straighten out the relationship between Chris and their tracker, no matter how prickly the job was. So while the others made camp and went about making dinner, Buck decided to follow Chris and try to talk some senseinto him."Damn it, Chris. Go talk to him!" Buck laid a hand on his old friend's shoulder to take the sting out of his words.
Chris Larabee spun around, raising a cloud of brown dust that circled his feet, shaking the friendly hand off. "There's nothing to talkabout, Buck."
"Chris, since we beat O'Shay's men and started back he uses every excuse to be alone. He's either out scouting ahead, off hunting, or taking a watch." The tall man's concern was evident in his voice, "We've been headed home for two days and he's hardly been seen."
"What the hell do you want me to do, Buck? Drag him over to the fire to sit and sip coffee?" Chris spat out the words, his anger building at Buck's interference.
Sighing deeply, Buck spoke softly, "Chris, you're the one who said you don't trust him." The deadly Larabee glare was ignored as Buck continued, "So you're the one who has to fix it."
"Buck....mind your own business. You don't know what you're...."
"I do know, Chris. Damn it! I've known for a long time how you feel...really feel about Vin." Buck looked at his old friend, "I was happy you finally found someone to care..."
"Shut up, Buck," Chris said, his tone cold enough to freeze water.
"No, Chris. I ain't gonna shut up." Buck grabbed at Chris's shoulders, "I know you want Vin. Hell, you need him. And he feels the same. I can see it in his eyes. It's there if you'd..."
Chris broke free, "Damn it, Buck! He ran off with a married woman...he don't want me!"
"You ass! You practically shoved him into her arms!" Buck began to pace back in forth in front of Chris. "I've seen how you've been treating him. One day, it's there ...in your eyes, the want and need. Then later, sometimes even the same day, it's gone, you're cold. Shutting him out. You've been playing that game with him for months! Then the minute we set off with the wagon train, you start mooning over Mary! Which you've done for most of this trip. And I know damn well you ain't interested in her!"
Chris stared at the ground, he knew in his heart Buck was right. He would make up his mind to approach Vin, then change it. He raised tired and sad eyes to Buck, "Don't matter now, he was going to go off with her. It's over."
"Chris, ain't you been listening to me? Go talk to him. He wants you, always has. You just never gave him a chance." Once again Buck grabbed Chris's shoulder, "That damn bitch knew what she was doing. Out of the seven of us, Vin was the easy target. Just what she needed to fire up that husband. She saw he was vulnerable, wanting someone..." Buck shook his head and continued, "Mary was worried about him since he's been avoiding us, she told me that Charlotte confided in her. She chased Vin, snuck off and asked to leave with him. She tried to get him to take her, offered it...Vin refused her. Told her it wasn't right." Buck looked straight into Chris's eyes, "He didn't want her, he wants you. That's why he's out there licking his wounds like a hurt animal! Because not only does he think you want Mary, but now he thinks you don't even trust him as your friend!"
Chris looked up at Buck, his shoulders sagging under the truth, "Judge asked me to keep an eye on Mary. He didn't want her to make a mistake. Was just bein' a friend. To her and the Judge. Never meant to hurt Vin."
"That's all you have to tell him, pard." Buck smiled and squeezed Chris's shoulder.
"I was never sure...that he...are you sure Buck?" Chris asked, his hopes rising that maybe he could fix things.
Buck closed the gap between them and put his hands on Chris's shoulders. He looked Chris straight in the eye, "Chris, I'm sure Vin feels about you...how you feel about him. It made me feel good...thinking you had a chance to be happy again. Please, talk to him." Chris let Buck's words sink in. He looked at his oldest friend and nodded. Buck squeezed Chris's shoulders and turned to go back to the camp. He glanced back to give Chris an encouraging smile.
Chris watched Buck walk away. He wanted a minute to gather his thoughts, think about what he wanted to say to Vin. Realizing that he had no idea how to prepare for this, Chris sighed and headed out to find Vin.
+ + + + + + +
Vin sat on a large boulder, a dry piece of weed between his teeth, trying not to think, but failing. He'd made up his mind, he would leave. As soon as they were close enough to see Four Corners, he'd head out. Part of him had to be sure the others, especially Chris, made it home safe. Chris. Damn, it hurt to even think about him. ‘Made a real ass of yourself, Tanner. Couldn't have who you wanted...so ya ran off with another man's wife. And Chris...he didn't trust him now.' It was worse than any physical wound, losing Chris's trust. He couldn't stay now, it hurt too much.
It took Chris a while to find the secluded spot where Vin had gone. It was nestled against a rock wall, hidden away from view by some trees and big rocks. Approaching the boulder the quiet tracker was perched upon, Chris could see Vin was lost in thought.
"Chris coming in," he called to warn Vin of his presence.
Vin looked up, then turned his gaze back to the hills. His stomach tightened and his heart ached. He hoped Chris would leave quickly, it was too painful to be with near him.
"Vin, we need to talk," Chris climbed up to sit beside Vin.
Vin didn't turn to look, but simply said, "About what?"
Chris wished Vin would look at him, he used to be able to read the quiet man by his eyes. "I said some things to you, when I was mad. I had no right." Hoping Vin would turn Chris stopped.
Vin bowed his head lower towards his chest, "What do ya mean?"
Silently Chris cursed, "You gotta know, I trust you more than I trust myself. Never should have said that I didn't." Chris was hoping for some sign, something to make this easier.
Vin played with a string on his hide coat, his head never turning, "It's all right. Reckon I had it coming...I was wrong. I'm sorry."
Chris wasn't sure how to begin the next part. As he tried to think of a way, Vin's voice pulled him back to the situation.
"Appreciate you telling me this, Chris. So I figure I may as well tell you now..." He turned his head slightly towards Chris, his hat covering his eyes. "Soon as we get near town, I'm heading out."
Chris's head snapped up, "Heading out? For how long? Where?" Vin dropped his gaze back to his jacket, "For good."
Chris felt as if he was punched in the gut, "Vin! No...don't go. I just told you...I was wrong!"
Shaking his head, his voice barely a whisper, "Chris, I have to go. If you're my friend, you'll let me, for my sake. It's better for me."
Chris couldn't believe this... why would Vin leave? Chris turned his body and grabbed both of Vin's arms, "Look at me Vin. Why? Why do you have to leave?"
Held fast by Chris's strong arms, Vin tilted his head up to look at Chris's face for an instant. That was all it took for Chris to read the pain and hurt in those eyes. Pain and hurt he caused. He knew that Vin was leaving because it hurt too much for him to see Chris with ...Mary.
Unsure of the right words, Chris began. "Don't go, Vin. I need you. I ..." And with that he pulled Vin close and pressed their lips together. Chris was lost in the moment, savoring the feel of Vin in his arms. He wanted Vin to open his mouth so he could taste him better. Suddenly, he felt the tension in Vin's body, the lack of response. ‘Oh God, was Buck wrong.' He broke the kiss, but not his hold on Vin's arms.
"Vin, was I wrong...don't you..." Chris asked hesitantly.
Vin looked up at him, his eyes wide, "You and Mary...you..."
"Never. Not Mary. You, Vin, only you. The Judge asked me to watch out for her, make sure she didn't make a mistake." He moved an arm to cup Vin's face and rub his thumb across Vin's lips.
Vin didn't know what to say or what to do. This was want he wanted, what he had wanted for so long...and Chris wanted him.
Chris could see the play of emotions on Vin's face - surprise, happiness, fear...he pulled him close and claimed his mouth again, but this time Vin didn't resist.
When they broke for air, Vin asked, "Chris, are you sure? Are you sure you want this, with me?
"Vin, I've never been more sure in my life. I've wanted this for a long time. Never had the nerve to let you know."
"I was afraid you'd shoot me," Vin smiled.
Chris felt his heart fill at the sight of Vin's smile. Before they did anything more, he wanted Vin to be sure what this was all about. "Vin, I want you. Right now."
Vin reached out a hand and gently brushed back the hair that had fallen onto Chris's forehead. "I want you too, have for a long time."
Vin's voice was so soft, Chris had to strain to hear it. His touch so gentle, Chris wasn't sure at first he really felt it. He took Vin's hand in his own, "Vin, so ya know...when I said I want you now, I meant right now, here. But I mean for more than just now."
Vin smiled again, "And here I figured a cowboy like you was just after my virtue!"
Chris couldn't suppress his own smile at that. "Want more than your virtue," Chris said as he thrust a hand into Vin's hair to pull him in for a kiss.They kissed, slowly at first, savoring the new tastes and sensations. Then as the passion they had both denied for so long surfaced, the kiss became more intense. Soon Chris was pulling Vin's coat off his shoulders. He pushed the suspenders off Vin's shoulders, untied the bandana around his neck, then unbuttoned his shirt.
Vin helped pull Chris out of his duster and then began to unbutton the black shirt. As he struggled with them, Chris reached up to help. Vin pulled back to look at Chris.
"You ever done this with a man?" Vin asked, then licked his lips enjoying the flavor of Chris.
"Yeah, you?" Chris replied with a question, his eyes fixated on Vin's mouth and tongue.
"When I was with the Indians. Never with someone who I ..." Instead of finishing, Vin leaned in to resume the kiss.
Chris let his hands roam freely over the lean lithe body while his tongue danced with Vin's. Chris knew what Vin was telling him, that this time with Chris was different and it was, for them both. Once his fingers found a nipple, Chris couldn't resist pinching it, rubbing the nub making Vin moan.
Dropping his hand from his exploration of Chris's sculpted back, Vin let his hand stray around to the front and the large bulge in the tight black pants. "Think we need to free this?" Vin asked, his voice thick with desire.Chris reluctantly broke the close contact, "Guess we better find a better spot than this damn boulder." He stood and removed his gun and tight black pants.
Vin stood up and removed his gun and pants. He walked towards Chris who was laying his duster on the ground as a makeshift bed. Vin added his hide jacket to help make them more comfortable.
They stood silently looking at each's other body, eyeing each other's obvious arousal. Vin held up his hand and showed Chris a small brown bottle of liquid. He moved closer to Chris and whispered in his ear "Fuck me, Chris. Fuck me hard."
Giving Vin a lusty smile Chris replied, "What ever you want, pard."
Vin sat down on the duster and was moving to get on his hands and knees when Chris's voice stopped him."Vin, no. I want to be able to see your face."
Vin rolled onto his back and Chris dropped to his knees between his legs. He opened the bottle and poured some of the liquid onto his fingers. Once they were coated, he slipped one into Vin. He rubbed Vin's thigh and hip with the other hand while he slipped in another finger. Chris searched for the magic spot within Vin and was rewarded by Vin pushing down onto his fingers even more when he hit it. Chris continued to stretch and prepare Vin, not wanting to hurt him. When he thought Vin was ready Chris pulled out his fingers and moved to position himself.
Vin stopped him. "Got a better idea, cowboy. Sit back." Once Chris was sitting, Vin straddled him on his knees. His readied entrance was positioned over Chris's swollen member.
Chris smiled and pulled Vin's body close, savoring the feeling of their bodies touching. He helped push Vin down onto his hard shaft, then they worked together to pull Vin up. Slowly they started, until they found the rhythm.
Soon, the only sounds were those of flesh hitting flesh and soft moans of pleasure as the two men made love. Chris pushed his hand in between their bodies and started to pump Vin's member in time with the thrusting. It didn't take long for both men to come, calling out each other's name. Chris captured Vin's mouth and kissed him, long and hard. Their tongues probing each other's mouths. When their bodies were completely spent, Chris helped Vin up, while he slipped out of the warm depths.Vin reached for his bandana and wiped away the traces of their lovemaking. Chris pulled him back into his arms and kissed him again, this time, gently.
Vin seemed to sense Chris's unspoken message about the depths of his feelings and he wrapped his arms around Chris in an embrace that spoke volumes about his own feelings.
Finally, Chris broke the kiss, "We best get back to camp before Buck comes to see what's taking so long."
"Buck?" Vin asked, while he ran his hand up and down Chris's arm.
"Yep, Buck. Seems he figured us out long before we did. Was concerned we were wasting too much time.
Vin chuckled, "You can always depend on Buck."
Chris laughed too as he stood up, pulling Vin with him. Vin decided he liked the sound of Chris's laugh and made a vow to try his best to get the somber gunfighter to laugh more.
They dressed quickly, Vin throwing Chris a satisfied smile. Chris felt the warmth from that smile from his heart to his crotch and vowed to see Vin smile as often as possible.
They walked back to the camp in silence, no need for words. Not now.
THE END
Comments to: jujbs@erols.com