Disclaimer: Not mine. You know the drill.
Comments: I thought I'd write about the VERY first time Chris and Vin uh... meet. And you thought it was in the pilot. <g> Anyway, feedback is good. I like it. Hope you guys like the story.
Chris Larabee was drunk. Dead drunk. Damned drunk. Drunk as a skunk. Drunk enough to have dulled most of the pain. But not all of it. Never all of it. There was nothing here on Earth that could do that. And Heaven apparently had better things to do with its time. Which left just whiskey, and a terrible anger, to fill up the empty places inside. The places that used to be filled with his wife's gentle laughter and his son's exuberant hugs. Before the fire had claimed them. And left nothing but ashes behind.And now here he was. A year later. Upstairs in the local cathouse in some Texas cowtown he couldn't even remember the name of. Waiting for some nameless, faceless woman to come and put her hands on him. Make him forget. If she could.
Looking around the dim room with its gaudy decor that strove for opulent and elegant, but was merely tasteless and rather pathetic, Chris felt a wave of disgust. Did he really think the touch of a tired, shopworn whore was going to chase away the memory of Sarah's clean scent? Her soft skin? The love shining in her eyes? Did he really even want it to?
Yes. He admitted painfully. He wanted it to. Just for a little while. He spent most of his waking hours searching for answers and not finding any. Looking for someone to punish. And finding only himself. And the few unfortunate people who hadn't quite given up on Chris Larabee yet. Like Buck. Who was probably in the next room right now getting the royal treatment from any working gal who wasn't with a customer at the moment. They gave it away for Buck. Free. But Chris liked keeping things on a business level. He paid them for their time. That way, they were just a body. He wanted nothing more. Not from them. Not from anyone. The room was starting to spin a bit, so Chris closed his eyes. The sheets felt deliciously cool against his bare skin. He felt a stir of interest from his nether regions at the sensation. Running his fingers lightly over the length of his cock, he took a deep breath and waited for the girl he'd chosen this evening. The one who was going to make him forget.
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Vin Tanner walked slowly up the stairs, wishing he'd thought to bring a bottle of whiskey along with him. He paused at the top, trying to remember what the Madame had said. Third room on the right? No. The last room on the left? Shit. He'd already had more whiskey than was good for him. The second room on the right at the end of the hall? That was it. He was sure of it. He started walking again, nervous anticipation churning in his gut.
He hated coming to these places. Hated the feeling of having to pay someone for the use of their body. He sometimes wished... Well hell. He wished a lot of things. And not a single damn one of them had ever come true. Maybe it was just as well he was paying for it. That way he couldn't get his hopes up. Think that things might be different this time round. He'd been down that road. Too many times.
He paused outside the door of the room and wondered if maybe he should've taken that dark haired cowboy up on his offer of an evening's company after all. But no. There had been something in his eyes as he looked at Vin. Something that had made the tracker nervous. So here he was instead.
Taking a deep breath, he opened the door and stepped inside. The room was full of shadows, softening the hard edges. The only light came from a lamp in the corner, turned down to its lowest. But it wasn't low enough to suit Vin. He liked the darkness. Needed the darkness. So he wouldn't see the disgust in their eyes. Or the boredom. The utter lack of feeling. In the dark he could keep the last of his illusions. He had so few left. He studiously avoided looking at the room's other occupant as he made his way over to the lamp.
Extinguishing the lamp, Vin began slowly removing his clothes. The cool air felt good on his flushed, heated skin. As his eyes adjusted to the darkness, he was able to make out the figure sprawled wantonly across the bed. Pale blonde hair, sleek sculpted chest. Vin couldn't make out the man's features, but he suspected they were probably as beautiful as the rest of him.
Moving closer to the bed, Vin's breath caught in his throat as he realized the man was idly stroking long, slender fingers over his already hard length. Back and forth the fingers moved. Slowly. Languidly. Invitingly. Vin's own cock stirred in immediate response. A small sound escaped his lips as the man on the bed began running his free hand down his chest, brushing lightly over the erect nipples. He wanted to be the one to do that. Wanted to be the one to touch the faceless man on the bed. And he would. He'd paid for it. For him. Vin sank down onto the bed and reached out a hand.
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Chris heard the door open, but kept his eyes closed. He heard his companion move quietly across the room. Heard the soft hiss of the lamp as it was extinguished. Chris opened his eyes, frowning. About to order his companion to relight it. But he found the darkness of the room unexpectedly appealing. It was impersonal, yet oddly intimate. Suiting his mood. He closed his eyes again and continued stroking himself. He could feel the shadowy figure watching him. Could hear the soft intake of breath.
Chris was surprised by the pleasure that small sound from his companion afforded him. He generally tried to make sure his partner enjoyed the experience as best he could, but he didn't fool himself that any of them were there because they wanted to be. They were there because he paid them. And that was how he wanted it. But still... It had been nice to hear. That small intake of breath that spoke of desire. For him. Maybe tonight he would be able to forget. For a few hours.
The gunslinger ran a hand over his chest, lightly teasing his nipples til they hardened under his touch. He smiled when he felt the the bed sag as the weight of his companion settled next to him. A finger ran lightly across his lips. An unexpected, and oddly erotic, action. The finger traced the contours of his lips before brushing delicately across his cheek and down his neck til it hovered over his chest. "Not shy are you?" Chris whispered teasingly.
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Shy? In response, Vin lowered his hand and grasped a nipple, rolling it gently between his fingers. Then he lowered his head and grazed the other one with his teeth before flicking his tongue over it. His companion groaned softly, reaching up to twine a hand in Vin's hair. "Guess not."
The man half laughed, half moaned as Vin's tongue circled each nipple. Over and over. Til the man was squirming beneath him, hands knotted so tightly in the tracker's hair that it was almost painful. He pulled the tracker up til their lips met in a fierce kiss. Vin had never been kissed like this before. Most of the other men he'd been with hadn't bothered with the kissing part. And he'd never initiated it with the ones whose company he bought. Kissing was such an... intimate thing to do. An expression of desire. Of caring.
Vin eagerly opened his lips, following his companion's lead, when he felt the lean, hard body beneath him freeze for a moment. Before he could do more than register it, however, the man resumed kissing him, tongue sliding easily into Vin's mouth. Caressing. Challenging.
Never one to back away from a challenge, Vin explored every inch of the fine, smooth skin. Stroking his hands down chest and sides. Kissing his way up the man's entire body. Stopping only to nibble at the tender flesh of his inner thigh. Tantalizingly close to the hard, quivering cock. He blew lightly on it, causing his companion to growl and buck his hips. Wanting Vin to touch him.
The tracker sat up and swallowed determinedly, trying to control his pounding heart. He was so hard he thought he might bust if he didn't get some relief soon. But this was too good to rush. He felt his companion reach for him, trying to pull him down again. But the tracker caught the questing hand in one of his own.
"What's your hurry, cowboy?" Vin chuckled softly. He stared down at the shadowy figure next to him and wondered what color the man's eyes were. What his name was. What he was doing here in a place like this. But to know the answers to those questions would make him real. And real people were always disappointing you. So Vin pushed the questions to the back of his mind, determined to take what was offered tonight and not ask for more. He bent his head again. This time to take his companion's hard, aching cock into his mouth. The soft moans and thrashing hips caused a funny, warm, fluttery sensation in the pit of Vin's stomach. No he couldn't ask for anything further. He'd already been given more by this faceless stranger, this man he'd bought, than he'd ever received from anyone.
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Oh no. His companion wasn't shy at all. Chris moaned as he felt teeth graze a nipple, sending a jolt of pure desire through his body. Then a warm, wet tongue was there. Licking. Sucking. And he was shivering at the sensations. He reached up a hand and tangled it in soft, silky hair. He used that to pull his companion up to meet his waiting lips. Wanting to taste them. To know them.
Chris was so caught up in exploring the incredible heat and softness of his companion's mouth, that it took him a few moments to realize that it was no woman in the bed with him. That these incredible sensations were being caused by a man. He froze. Not knowing what he should do. Not knowing what the fuck he wanted to do. Then his companion parted his lips and ran a hand down Chris'back.
What the hell. Chris had done worse things. And he was drunk enough to not care about much beyond the moment, anyway. And this just felt too damn good to throw away. He relaxed and began running his tongue along the outside of his companion's lips. He'd just see how much this mystery man knew about how to please one Chris Larabee.
What seemed like hours later, Chris had his answer. His companion knew a helluva lot about pleasing him. He had Chris moaning and thrashing and near begging for release. The soft teasing touch of lips and hands was driving him crazy. He groaned as he felt the other man sit up and take a deep breath. Chris wanted him. Now. He reached up, trying to pull him down. Wanting his touch. But the man only laughed, capturing his hand and holding it easily between his own.
"What's your hurry, cowboy?" The words, spoken in a soft drawl, made Chris wonder what the face that went with the voice was like. It was probably better that he didn't know. He didn't want any attachments. Not even with this intoxicating stranger. A man. Somehow, lying here in this dark room, with his skin still tingling from this man's touch, that thought didn't seem as strange as it should have. Then he felt a hot wet mouth envelop him and he quit thinking about anything at all.
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"Oh God, cowboy. Ya gotta. Please." The tables were turned and it was now Vin who shuddered and moaned beneath the other man. "Pretty please, even?" The teasing voice was merciless. As were the teasing hands and mouth and... Vin gasped as a cool finger slid into him. He could smell the faint scent of herbs from the oil they'd found on the little table next to the bed. "Yes. Pretty please. With goddamn sugar on top." Vin arched his back, adding a silent plea as well. 'Oh, I like that." A hard, muscled body pressed up against him as the man slowly began to ease himself inside Vin. God. He felt so good. So very very good. Vin wished this night would never end.
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In unspoken agreement, both men were silent afterwards. After all, what was there to say? It had been both more than a mere paid encounter and less. Unique in both their experiences. Chris watched as the shadowy figure of his mystery lover finished dressing and reached for his hat. The man hesitated at the door, twisting around as if to say something. But then with a quick shake of his head, he pulled the door open and was gone. "See you around." Chris said softly into the darkness.
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Vin stood outside the door for a minute. Staring at it. Wishing it could be different. Always wishing. Finally he turned and began walking back down the hall. "Be seein' ya, cowboy." It was more than a hope. Not quite a promise.
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Chris lay there in the dark room for quite a while after his companion had left. When he finally got up and went downstairs, the first person he saw was the gal he'd originally chosen for the evening.
"Where have you been, sugar?" she frowned. "I waited for ya."
"I was upstairs. Waiting for you." Chris spoke curtly. He didn't want to talk to her. Didn't want to tarnish the memory of what had just happened with ugly reality. Not yet. Right now he wanted to savor the rare feeling of well being he felt. Of contentment.
"Now sugar, I was right there in my room, all warm and willin'."
"What room?" Chris demanded.
"The second one on the right at the front of the hall. Where did you go?" The young woman now looked faintly curious.
But Chris wasn't going to give her any answers. "The right room." With that, Chris walked away. Wondering what his recent companion would think if he knew that neither one of them had gotten what they paid for. Wondering if the stranger would even think twice about their encounter, now that it was over.
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Chris left town early the next morning. He never saw the long haired man go back to the cathouse the following night. He never heard the man ask for him again. Only to be told that the fellow who catered to those tastes had been knifed to death by a jealous customer late the previous evening. He didn't see the few bitter tears his erstwhile lover shed in private after hearing the news. And he never knew how often the stranger thought about their encounter. Long after it was over.
THE END
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