Boy Talk

by Tiffiny


"Sssshhhh.quiet. You do know what that means, don't ya kid?"

"Just cause I like to talk don't mean I can't be as quiet as the next fella, Vin." JD strove for a dignified response, which was rather difficult since he was down on his hands and knees crawling across the floor of Nathan's clinic, his face just inches away from the tracker's rear end.

"Oh yeah. Well, if you're any "quieter" they're gonna wake up and then we'll never get out of here." Vin was unimpressed with JD's attempt at dignity. He was also extremely conscious that his own dignity was sorely lacking. A grown man ought not to have to crawl like a worm on his belly just to git to somewheres.

JD's only response was to crawl faster. Vin's words had scared him spitless. He just wasn't up for any more of that hurt/comfort stuff. Especially not after that last go round. Why, those darn writers had just about turned him off of redheads for good. And havin' to tell Chris Larabee what they had done to Vin. Well, that was just downright mean.

+ + + + + + +

The two men made it safely outside. Standing up, they took a deep breath of fresh air.

"Where's it being held this week?" JD's head wound made it kind of difficult to remember things sometimes.

"ATF universe. Chris' place." Vin's reply was short and to the point. The strange fever, pneumonia and various other assorted injuries made him short of breath most of the time. From trying to subdue the pain. One of these days he was just going to trash the whole "take it like a man" theory and scream and wail to his heart's content. But right now he and JD had places to go and things to do.

+ + + + + + +

"Help! Help!" Blithely ignoring the beautiful girl who was screaming in terror, Vin and JD continued walking out of the store. Shifting the bags they were carrying, the two men tipped their hats as they passed her cowering figure.

"Sure wish we could oblige Ma'am. But we just aint got the time."

Once out of the store, the two men paused and glanced at one another, shuddering.

"Her hair was red." JD remarked, screwing his face up into a grimace of disgust.

"Yup." Vin agreed with the kid's assessment of matters.

They walked over to Vin's jeep and threw the bags in the back before climbing in.

"Hurry." JD was anxious.

In reply, the tracker pressed his foot down on the accelerator, leaving traces of smoking rubber in their wake.

+ + + + + + +

"It's about damn time." Buck Wilmington groused as Vin and JD walked through the door of Chris Larabee's ranch house.

"Geez, Buck. It's nice to see you, too." JD replied rather huffily. His head hurt.

"Oh for pete's sake, JD. I just saw ya a few hours ago. I aint hardly stirred from your sickbed." The older man sounded disgusted.

"Like you had any choice." JD was not about to give credit where none was due.

"Boys. Boys. Instead of wasting what little free time time we have bickering, I suggest we get started. Vin, why don't you bring that stuff into Chris. He's in the kitchen." Josiah smiled, but there was an underlying menace to it. Along the lines of "I could snap you like a twig if I wanted to, so don't mess with me".

The two men grudgingly obeyed. JD muttered beneath his breath as he went around the table to take a seat by Ezra, who was ignoring everyone in favor of the Wallstreet Journal.

"Easy for him to be so cheerful. When's the last time he was injured." JD hadn't meant for his words to be overheard and froze like a deer caught in headlights at the ex preacher's deceptively gentle question.

"You say something Brother Dunne?"

"Uh..no. Not a thing, Josiah."

"Perhaps you are capable of taking at least some elements of wisdom to heart." The gambler was obviously not as enthralled by the market as he'd been pretending.

"What are you talking about, Ezra?" JD demanded crossly. Perhaps he should have sat by Buck, after all. At least the other man's vocabulary didn't make his teeth ache. His head already hurt bad enough.

"Discretion being the better part of valor, my dear boy. I don't know how many times I've dispensed that piece of advice. It warms my heart to see one of you uncouth miscreants finally act upon it." The southern agent sounded insufferably smug. He always was on poker night.

"What's taking those two so long, anyway?" Nathan Jackson fretted as he glared towards the kitchen from which Vin and their fearless leader had yet to make an appearance.

"Calm down now, Nathan. You know how those two boys are. Worse than a couple of rabbits in" Buck broke off as the healer shot him a look that would have blistered the hide off of stainless steel.

"That's right. Go ahead and joke about it. Easy enough for you to do. They don't make you suffer like me and Josiah have." The healer sounded perilously close to tears as he glanced at the ex preacher for confimation.

"Amen to that, Brother Nathan." Josiah agreed fervently. "Tortures of the damned."

"What are you guys talking about? I've been beat and shot and" Buck's litany was cut short by JD joining the fray with his list of complaints.

"Head wounds and sexual trauma and mysterious fevers" JD was in turn interrupted by Ezra.

"Stabbed and left for dead. Coats always being taken or ruined. Beaten" Nathan recovered himself at this point and snorted loudly.

"NO SEX!" The healer brought them all up short with this one complaint.

"But surely you'veThere must have been" Ezra frowned as he trailed off. "Perhaps not." He murmured with an apologetic glance in Nathan's direction.

Buck appeared horrified. Too stunned to speak.

JD's eyes welled up with tears. "I'm so sorry, you guys. That just aint fair. There's more than enough to go around."

"Speak for yourself, JD. The only person who seems to get enough around here is"

As if on cue, Vin Tanner walked through the kitchen door followed closely by Chris Larabee. The tracker was waving his arms and yelling.

"I've had more than enough of you, Chris Larabee. I can't believe you'd be so insensitive to my needs. Always thinkin' of yourself. You can find someone else to warm your bed tonight!" The irate tracker went and flopped down into the empty chair next to Buck, who eyed him with ill concealed hostility. Then Vin let out a shriek of pain as his sore ribs, head, and butt protested this hasty action. The tracker was so intent on his own injuries that he didn't notice the satisfied smirks of the other men.

Chris folded his arms and glared down at his erstwhile lover. "I'm sooo glad you said that, Vin." He remarked silkily, as the doorbell rang.

While Vin pondered their leader's words, eyes narrowed in suspicion, Chris went to answer the door. He returned a few minutes later with a strangely familiar looking fellow close on his heels.

"Boys", he announced. "I'd like you to meet a friend of mine. His name's Michael Wiseman."

"He looks kinda like Vin." JD whispered.

"He don't neither! Not nearly as purty." The tracker snapped, leaning over the table to swat ineffectually at JD.

"Vin's right, JD." Chris agreed smoothly. "Just look at the muscles on Michael here. And the nice short hair. The definite improvement in wardrobe. Pretty isn't the word I would use."

One by one, the others nodded their agreement.

"But..you want me don't ya Ez?" The sharpshooter threw a beseeching look in the gambler's direction.

The gambler sighed. "Sorry, Mr. Tanner. I am afraid my tastes are rather more inclined in another direction. He gazed lingeringly at Buck.

JD followed the gambler's gaze. "Hey! He's taken!" The young sheriff scowled at the southern turncoat.

Buck ignored both of them. "Taken? Hmmmm." He glanced assessingly at the ex -preacher.

Josiah was too busy smiling inanely in the healer's direction to notice.

Nathan was rubbing his hands together, imagining the feel of a certain southern boy's skin.

Chris was stroking that Michael fella's back with a gleam in his eye.

No one was paying the slightest bit of attention to Vin.

This wasn't supposed to happen. It never happened like this. Never. Never. Never. Never.

THE END

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