THIRTEEN

Chris was just about finished cooking the rabbits Vin had brought back earlier in the day, when he heard the tracker ride up. He moved the pan off of the flame, and smoked a cheroot while he waited for Vin to get his horse unsaddled and bedded down for the night.

Chris couldn't read Vin's face when he came in. The tracker hung up his hat and coat without a word.

"You hungry?" Chris asked, his stomach muscles tight.

"Yeah." Vin answered.

Chris set the plates on the table and spooned some of the tender rabbit onto them. They ate in silence. Chris was so tense, he barely choked down a few mouthfuls. Vin, he noticed, had no such trouble and ate every bite.

"You ain't hungry?" Vin questioned, as he got up and took his plate to the sink.



"No." Chris wanted to scream, as he threw his own plate into the sink. Instead, he lit a cheroot and stalked out the door to smoke it. If Vin didn't say something soon, Chris was going to demand an answer.

He didn't have much longer to wait. Vin washed the plates and then came to stand beside Chris.

"Chris," Vin's raspy voice was almost a whisper, and he stared off into the night, without looking at Chris. "I been scared a long time. I don't wanta be scared no more. So, if you're still offerin, I'm sayin' yes."

FOURTEEN

Chris turned to his partner and put his arms around him. He stroked his hair and said softly, "Yeah, I'm still offering."

Chris could feel the younger man trembling as he held him. Vin was standing with his arms at his sides and his head down. He hadn't moved since Chris put his arms around him, and Chris knew he was terrified. "Don't worry, Vin," he told him gently. "I promise, I won't hurt you. It's getting cold out here, why don't we go inside?" Without waiting for an answer, he turned towards the house. He kept one arm around the bounty hunter's shoulder and gently propelled him into the house.

Chris took a good look at his young partner in the lamplight. Vin was pasty white and he was shaking with fear. His blue eyes were so dark, they looked like black marbles. Chris remembered how skittish Sarah had been on their wedding night. The difference was, that Sarah's fear had been of the unknown. Vin's fear was of something very real, a nightmare of pain and abuse he'd never be able to forget.

Chris let go of Vin's shoulders and pushed him gently towards a chair. "Vin, take your boots off." He said in a firm voice. Vin looked at Chris like he didn't understand a word the older man had said. Chris realized that Vin was going to need his help with everything tonight. "It's ok, Vin," he said gently, as he squatted down in front of his partner. "Let me help you." And Chris pulled his boots off for him. When he was done, he pulled the frightened man to his feet and took his gunbelt off. This is going to be harder than I thought, was the only thing Chris could think as he hung Vin's gunbelt on a peg near the door.

Chris searched the cupboard over the stove, until he found the little bottle of oil that cowboy had given him. He remembered trying to refuse it and the man pressing it into his hands, telling him he never knew when it might come in handy. He never expected to use it, but for some reason he hadn't thrown it away. Chris got clean rags and put the oil and rags on the night stand by his bed. He locked the door, and took his own boots and gun off. When he was ready, he stooped in front of Vin again. He put one hand on Vin's shoulder and told him gently, "Vin, let's go over to the bed now."

FIFTEEN

The bounty hunter nodded and Chris helped him to his feet. Vin froze beside the bed and looked at Chris helplessly. He couldn't take that last step to save his life. Chris pulled him into his arms and rubbed his back. The tracker stood mutely, with his head on Chris's chest. His heart was pounding furiously. Chris knew he had to ease Vin's fear, before he did anything else. Chris pushed his partner down on the side of the bed until he was sitting on the edge. Chris let him go and quickly walked around to the other side. He sat down on the other side and leaned

over to the young bounty hunter. "Vin, lie down now," Chris told him softly, at the same time, gently pulling him into his arms. Cradling his partner, he laid back against the pillows.

"Vin, listen to me." Chris began in a gentle voice. "I promise, nothing's going to happen, if you don't want it to. Let's just get used to holding each other for a little bit, OK?"

The younger man nodded and Chris pulled Vin's arm across his chest. Vin's body was as taut as a bowstring and he was still shaking. Chris held him in a protective embrace, one hand stroking his hair lightly, the other wrapped around the tracker's narrow shoulders. Chris whispered soothingly to his young partner, and waited patiently for Vin to relax enough, to understand that there was no threat in his embrace.

Chris felt some of the rigidity leave Vin's body and in a slow pattern, he began gently stroking his partner's back. The tracker was still shaking and Chris knew that he was going to have to take things slowly and let Vin adjust to each new touch and sensation if the night was going to go the way he hoped.

Vin's heart was pounding so loud, he was sure they could hear it back in Four Corners. He couldn't believe he'd agreed to this. He was in a bed with a man, his best friend and he was gonna let him do those things. Things he'd sworn no one would ever do to him again. He felt the fear, that he'd carried for so long. It was solid in his gut, and it weighed him down as surely as a rock tied to his leg would.

He could barely hear Chris's voice, over the pounding of his heart, and he didn't comprehend a single word his friend was saying. But, the voice was low and soothing, and Chris's hand on his back was gentle, and the slow rhythm was easing some of the tension he felt. Maybe, just maybe, this wouldn't be as awful as he was sure it was going to be.

Chris hugged his partner and turned on his side, so he and Vin were facing each other. He could see the naked fear in the bounty hunter's eyes. He brought the arm he was lying on up between the two of them and used that hand to gently stroke the side of Vin's face. With his other hand, he kept rubbing the younger man's back in a soothing rhythm. "Shhhhhh," he cooed gently, much as he used to comfort Adam when the little boy was frightened. Chris knew that before he made even the smallest advance, he was going to have to get Vin to relax enough to understand that he was safe and that Chris wasn't going to do anything to hurt him. The older man knew that this would be the hardest part tonight. Vin's fear was so real, it was like a very unwelcome third person between them in the bed.

SIXTEEN

Chris felt the tension slowly draining from the Vin's body. He was still trembling, but Chris knew that Vin trusted him. He was sure that if he moved slowly and didn't do anything to frighten the younger man anymore than he already was, Vin would begin to respond to the gentleness in his touch.

Vin was responding to the soothing sounds Chris was making and the gentle way the older man was caressing his face and back. The fear was receding enough to where he was starting to notice other things. Things like how nice the gentle pressure from Chris's hand felt on his back. And that he wanted to nuzzle into the hand that was caressing his cheek. And the fact that Chris didn't seem to be in a rush to do anything. Those others, had hardly waited long enough to yank his jeans off, before they'd mounted him. Before they'd hurt him. Vin pushed the thoughts down into the pit of his stomach and his eyes closed, as he unconsciously rubbed his face against Chris's hand.

Chris's heart leapt when he felt Vin's face move ever so slightly into his caress. Vin was by no means ready for Chris to attempt any intimacies, but Chris knew that he'd won the first battle in what was likely to be a very long war.

Chris kept caressing the younger man's face and back. Vin wasn't trembling nearly as much as he had been and the rigidity had left his body. His eyes were closed, the thick lashes making dark crescents against his creamy skin. When the hell, had he decided Vin's skin was creamy, Chris wondered to himself? Just about the same time, he'd noticed how tempting Vin's lips were, he guessed. The young tracker's mouth was slightly open and it looked damned inviting to him.

This wasn't part of the plan, Chris thought wryly. He'd expected to enjoy the encounter. After all, he was planning on getting laid tonight. But, he hadn't counted on enjoying it this much, this soon. He could already feel the first stirring in his groin. And, for the second time that night, he thought this is gonna be harder than I thought.

Vin was just about as ready to be kissed as he was ever likely to be, so Chris stopped caressing his cheek and waited. He didn't have to wait long. Vin's eyes opened within a few seconds. The younger man looked at him questioningly, and Chris asked him softly, "Vin, can I kiss you now?" He knew how important it was for his friend feel like he was in control of things tonight. Vin blushed and lowered his eyes, but he managed a tiny, whispered, yeah. Damn, Chris thought. He'd known Vin was shy, but he never expected that pink color to flow so appealingly into his cheeks. Chris pulled Vin's head closer and kissed him tenderly on the mouth. The young bounty hunter's lips were trembling slightly and they were softer than Chris expected. He had a hard time resisting the urge to push his tongue between them and explore every inch of the sweet mouth. But, he did resist. He just kept pressing gentle kisses on the soft lips, until he felt Vin return the kiss. The shy tracker's first kiss was so hesitant as to be almost nonexistent, but it was unmistakable. And Chris knew he'd won another battle.

SEVENTEEN

Chris brushed his tongue lightly against his young partner's lips, watching Vin's face intently. The younger man's eyes flew open, and the fear in those blue depths was plain when he looked at Chris. This was the first intimate thing Chris had done, and he had known it would frighten the bounty hunter. Chris smiled at him, and Vin tried to smile back at him, but just ended up looking so damn vulnerable, that Chris felt his breath catch in his throat. Somehow, this night was turning into a hell of a lot more than the gunslinger had expected.

Chris felt Vin's hand moving on his shoulder. The younger man would lift his trembling hand away and bring it close to Chris's cheek, and then settle it back on his shoulder. Chris was certain Vin wanted to touch him, but was too shy, or he thought grimly, too afraid. Well, Chris would help him with this too.

When Vin's trembling hand moved off his shoulder again, Chris caught it in his steady grip. Vin froze, and Chris could see the stark terror in his eyes. Chris smiled reassuringly and brought the trembling hand to his mouth. Turning it over, he placed a gentle kiss in the center of Vin's palm. He used his tongue to tease the hard flesh, and then kissed it again. He heard a small gasp from his partner when he took two of his fingers into his mouth and began sucking and licking them. Chris was satisfied with the younger man's response and pulled Vin's fingers out of his mouth. He settled Vin's shaking hand on his cheek and used his own hand to guide the trembling fingers in a light stroking motion.

Vin blushed and smiled shyly at Chris, his eyes showing every bit of the confusion and curiosity and fear that the younger man was feeling. And Chris thought, they showed the tiniest bit of pleasure. Damn, no man's eyes should be that expressive, Chris couldn't help but thinking.

Vin turned his attention to the side of the older man's face. He was fascinated by the scratchy softness of Chris's cheek. Vin couldn't remember ever stroking another person's cheek like this. Maybe he'd stroked his ma's face, but he'd been so small when she died, that he just didn't know. He'd certainly never touched any of them, like this. Standing Horse hadn't touched him very much. It just wasn't his way. But, Vin still knew that the old man had loved him. And he'd loved that old man too. No, Vin didn't think he'd ever touched anyone like this before.

Chris watched Vin's face while he hesitantly explored Chris's face. He could see the curiosity - and the pleasure on the tracker's face. Chris saw his lips part slightly, and he wondered just how long it had been since Vin had touched anyone so intimately. It didn't matter, Chris was going to let him touch for as long as he wanted. But, those soft lips were just begging Chris Larabee to kiss them, and he had every intention of doing that right now.

Chris leaned over to Vin's mouth and kissed him again. He let his tongue gently explore the outside of Vin's lips. Damn, they were soft. Chris felt his cock straining against his pants. He waited until he felt another small kiss from Vin, before he let his tongue enter the sweet mouth a little. His kiss was intimate, but not passionate. He ran his tongue over Vin's teeth, and was pleased to hear a small moan come from his partner. Vin's hand had stopped stroking him, and was now frozen against his cheek. Chris didn't mind. Vin's hesitant responses to his touch and his kisses were enough for now.

Chris felt Vin's teeth part slightly and let his tongue slip between them. He could feel Vin's heart pounding furiously when their tongues met. Chris wanted to devour the sweet mouth, but he didn't. Somehow, he managed to use his tongue to gently stroke the inside of the younger man's mouth. Vin's tongue was as frozen as his hand, and Chris teased it gently until he felt a tiny movement. Chris found the shy responses he was eliciting from the frightened sharpshooter, more exciting than the come on's from the boldest whores he'd known. He continued to stoke Vin's back, and to tease the sweet tongue. Chris felt his heart leap when the tracker's hand began it's trembling exploration again - and his tongue timidly touched Chris's.

Vin couldn't believe that he didn't hate what was happening. He didn't hate it at all. He liked it. He liked it so well, that he wanted Chris to keep kissing him and touching him. There was a funny tingling in his belly that he liked a lot. He wanted to feel Chris's skin and Chris didn't seem to mind, so he started stroking his cheek again. Vin lifted his tongue a tiny bit and used the tip to cautiously graze Chris's. Chris either didn't notice, or he didn't mind. So, Vin let his tongue rub against Chris's a little longer and harder.

Chris of course, had noticed. It was all he could do, not to crush the younger man to him and kiss him fiercely. But, Chris knew that passion right now would spook the younger man so badly, that he might never be willing to try this again. And he had no intention of doing anything to frighten his tempting young partner. So, he tasted the tantalizing mouth slowly, as though Vin's tongue, so shy and hesitant wasn't driving him wild. As though his cock wasn't so hard right now, that it was making him decidedly uncomfortable.

Chris wanted to touch Vin badly. He was aching to feel the velvet of the tracker's soft skin. He considered briefly, just easing his hands down Vin's shirt, but he rejected the idea almost immediately. The thought of those blue eyes, so filled with fear - and trust in him, stopped him cold. There'd already been far too many people in the young tracker's life, who had just taken whatever they wanted from him, without giving him any say in the matter. No matter what, Chris wouldn't be another person who used him for his own needs. No, anything he took from Vin tonight, would be freely given.

EIGHTEEN

Chris didn't want to break off the kiss. Vin's mouth was so damn delicious he didn't want to give it up for a second, but Vin had to have the choice. "Vin, open your eyes and look at me." Chris said softly.

Vin opened his eyes and Chris could see the turbulent emotions swirling in those blue depths. Damn, a man could get lost in eyes like that. And Chris wasn't entirely sure, he didn't want to.

Vin let his hands drop back to the bed, as he searched Chris's face, trying to read something in his expression. Chris had seemed to like it when Vin touched him, but maybe he didn't. Or maybe Chris had decided, he didn't want to do this after all. Hell, he thought bitterly, I wouldn't blame him. Why would a man like Chris Larabee, want to go to bed with me?

". . . touch you." Vin was startled to realize, that Chris was talking to him softly. "I want to feel you. But, I don't want to do anything you don't want me to. Do you want me to touch you, Vin?"

The young tracker had never been very good with words, even when he wasn't scared and confused as hell. And, even when the questions he was being asked, weren't so damned embarrassing. Ezra'd come up with something real pretty to say to Chris, Vin thought desperately. Vin wondered when his mouth had stopped working. And how the hell, do you tell your best friend, that you want him to kiss you and touch you. Vin could feel the blood flowing into his cheeks, and he gave up trying to think of something to say, and just nodded wordlessly again. He tried to smile, because he wanted Chris to know, that he really did want this. But, he couldn't even manage to do that.

Vin had no idea of the effect he was having on Chris. The older man was trying hard to keep from losing control, but that delicious pink color in Vin's cheeks and those luminous eyes were making it harder by the minute.

Chris was too warm and he figured Vin must be too. Although Vin didn't seem to mind being too warm. Hell, he wore that hide coat of his, almost all the time, even in the summer. But, it gave Chris a good reason to take his shirt off, something that Vin could understand easily and not be afraid of.

Chris asked his partner softly, "Vin, it's hot as hell in here, you mind if I take my shirt off?" He didn't really think Vin would mind and he was probably being a little too considerate of the young tracker's feelings, but he was determined to give Vin as much control as possible tonight.

Vin wasn't hot. He rarely got too hot. But, he could see the light film of sweat on Chris's brow. He had finally managed to get his mouth working and told Chris "No, I don't mind." in his gravely voice.

Chris took his shirt off and used it to wipe the sweat off his forehead. Then he balled it up and threw it into a corner.

"Ezra'd have a fit, he saw you doin' that." Vin observed amiably.

Chris grinned wolfishly at him. "I'm doing a few other things, Ezra'd probably mind a whole lot more, pard."

Vin blushed and looked up at Chris mortified. Chris laughed and pulled the younger man into an affectionate hug. He was delighted when one of Vin's hands went to his shoulder. Chris laid him on his back against the pillows and kissed him lightly. "Why don't you let me unbutton your shirt now, Vin?"

Vin's mouth wasn't working again. He didn't quite know why, but every time Chris asked him about touching him or doing anything, his mouth stopped working. Vin could feel the heat in his face, as he blushed again. Casey Wells probably didn't blush as much as he did. Damn, it was embarrassing. He'd have been a lot more embarrassed, if he knew how excited his blushes were making his partner. Vin gave up trying to talk and nodded again. He sighed. He guessed he'd just have to take up sign language with the older man.

Chris could feel his cock straining against his pants again. It'd be a hell of a lot easier to keep under control, if Vin would stop looking at him with those eyes. And he kept on blushing like that. And that little sigh.

"Damn boy, you are hard to resist." He growled at the younger man and kissed him sensuously. He let go of the tracker and used his hands to unbutton Vin's shirt. He could feel Vin's heart pounding and the way the young tracker started to shake again. But Vin didn't stop kissing him. And he was stroking Chris's cheek with those trembling fingers again.

Chris finished unbuttoning Vin's shirt and wrapped his arms around his partner. He didn't try to touch the bounty hunter's chest with his hands. Instead, he leaned in close so that their chests and stomachs were pressed against each other. He'd just enjoy the deliciousness of the tracker's mouth, while Vin got used to their bodies touching.

Vin froze when he felt Chris's body against his. The fear he'd pushed down in his gut, was clawing it's way up his throat, choking him. He closed his eyes, trying to keep the fear from overwhelming him. And then he heard it. That gentle voice, soothing him, keeping the fear at bay. And he felt Chris's hand on his back, stroking him. Vin wrapped his arm around his partner's neck and clung to him desperately. It wasn't logical and he knew it didn't make sense. He was pulling closer to Chris's body and it was the feel of Chris's body, that had caused his fear to rise up so fiercely. Vin didn't understand it and he didn't try to. All he wanted to do was hide his face against Chris's strong chest, and wait for the older man to make it go away.

And Chris did make it go away, or at least recede enough so that Vin could breath again. He held Vin close, one hand wrapped around his shoulders and the other rubbing his back in a slow pattern. He whispered low and soft in the young tracker's ear. Chris's heart ached for his friend. Damn! Vin shouldn't have to go through this. No one should. If he ever saw that animal again, he'd kill him. And he didn't care how he did it, either. If he had to shoot him in the back, he would. No one who could hurt a kid like this, should be allowed to live. Chris was so lost in his thoughts, that he almost missed the whispered "Chris, I'm sorry."

Oh Christ, Vin was apologizing for his fear. A fear that was pretty damned reasonable, under the circumstances, Chris thought. "Vin, you don't have anything to be sorry for." He told him gently. Chris looked down, into liquid blue pools, that were full of fear and shame. He hugged him closer. "Vin, you don't have to do this."

Vin looked at him with those eyes and shook his head. "Yeah, I do Chris. If I don't do this now, with you, I don't think I'll ever be able to." His voice was barely audible and so full of hurt, that Chris found it painful, just listening to it.

"It's gonna be ok, Vin. I'll get you through this, I swear I will pard." Chris couldn't keep the emotion out of his own voice. "We'll take it real slow and when you need to stop for a little while, we will. OK?"

Vin nodded. His voice wasn't working again.

They lay there, Vin wrapped in Chris's arms and clinging to his neck. He felt like a damn kid. How the hell was he gonna be able to do this, when just the feel of Chris's chest against his, had scared the hell out of him.

Chris knew that he was going to have to judge when Vin was ready to go ahead with things. Vin's natural shyness would have made this night difficult for him, before he'd been hurt so badly. And, Chris had seen how much trouble Vin was having, finding words already tonight. So, he'd keep holding him, and he'd wait. He'd wait until he felt the tension in Vin's body ease. Until he felt those trembling fingers, move haltingly again. He'd wait and then he'd make love to this vulnerable man, who didn't even know how appealing he was.

CONTINUE

COMMENTS