Firelight: Waiting for Relief

They really should be thanking me for my kind gesture, particularly after the things they have said these past few days, Ezra Standish mumbled to himself. Still it was somewhat generous of Mr. Larabee to front me the wherewithal to get myself a new hat.

He ran a hand over the hatbox tied to his saddle. Removing the recently bullet-ridden hat from his head, the gambler flung it in the direction of the fire he saw about a mile off. It had to belong to Mr. Larabee and Mr. Tanner.

"Good-bye, old friend." Ezra heaved a deep, dramatic sigh. Then, before he had the chance to feel sartorially deprived, he retrieved his new hat and donned it. It didn't fit nearly as well as his old hat, but it would have to do.

Ezra continued to ride slowly towards the flickering light. Mr. Tanner and Mr. Larabee had watch tonight, and he had decided, in, of course, a pure act of kindness on his part, that he would relieve them of their watch. It seemed somewhat odd that neither of them had run or rode out to greet (and therefore, thank) him on his way back from Eagle Bend. Mr. Tanner was, after all, the tracker of their little group, and Mr. Larabee had proven on many occasions to have excellent hearing.

Ah, yes, an act of providence. And, Ezra admitted to himself, of slight selfishness. The night was cold and the other gentlemen's fire looked quite suitably warm. Ezra tied his horse to a tree nearby the other geldings and approached the campfire.

What Ezra saw when he actually got close enough to the light to see much of anything stopped him in his tracks. What he was witnessing was certainly the last reason he ever expected Mr. Tanner and Mr. Larabee not to notice him.

Mr. Tanner – Vin – was lying near the fire on Chris' bedroll. The flames gleamed through his hair and made his naked body shine golden. A half-dressed Chris, kneeling beside the prone tracker, was kissing Vin's lips with the utmost gentleness and delicacy. It was as if Chris was trying to savor Vin's taste without harming him.

Vin, on the other hand, was a bit fiercer. His actions were obscured by the fall of his hair, but Ezra could see that, once they relinquished the kiss, Vin trailed his mouth over Chris' neck with a marked passion. The tracker's long, purposeful fingers were busy, too, but they mirrored Chris' gentleness.

Ezra watched, awed, as Chris arched into Vin's touch, murmuring something that was barely audible. The tips of Vin's fingers skimmed over the lean, fine muscles of Chris' chest, then he pressed his palms flat against the fair skin. Chris let out a soft breath, his lips tilting up to kiss Vin's eyelids closed. Their mouths met again, Chris' crushing Vin's in the kind of kiss Ezra would have expected of him.

Enthralled, Ezra took a step closer to improve his view. Providence wasn't with him when he chose his moment, though, because he unwittingly nudged a loose rock with his foot and sent it skittering loudly toward the pair on the blanket.

"Damnation," Ezra whispered to himself as he saw Chris get up to see what the noise had been. The gambler knew better than to run from Chris. That would get him shot quicker than he could inhale his next breath. He simply kept quiet and stood there, waiting for his death.

Chris eyed him warily, squinting in the firelight. "Goddamn, Ezra! What the hell are you doing out here?!"

"I swear, Chris, I didn't see anything! I was just coming back from Eagle Bend and saw the fire. I didn't mean . . ."

"Chris?" Vin curled up on the blanket, his knees clasped to his chest.

"It's Ezra, Vin." The tone was no longer furious, simply resigned. Chris led Ezra roughly over to the fire, practically dragging the smaller man by the shoulder. "How long were you watching?"

"Long enough."

"Long enough ta see us." Vin's voice was toneless. "That's it then, Chris. What're we gonna do?" The wind kicked up suddenly and woke up motes of light in his long hair.

Chris knelt beside his lover and kissed the tracker's forehead with startling tenderness. "I don't know," he admitted defeatedly. He slumped beside and a little behind Vin, letting the younger man lean back against him while he wrapped a fold of the blanket around them both.

"Listen, you may not be able to trust me with other people's money, but you can trust me with this, I swear it!" Ezra pleaded earnestly. The sight of their turmoil cut him to places he thought he'd long left behind. "I will not tell anyone in town or any of the others. I know how important this is to the both of you."

Chris cocked his head at Ezra. "Talk."

"Lonely times, I know. It's important to have someone to . . ." Ezra growled in frustration, sounding more like Mr. Larabee than himself. Since when was it so difficult for him to speak? "Look, you two gentlemen love each other, do you not?"

Vin glanced up at the blond man supporting him before answering softly. "Yeah."

"I envy you that. Just . . . just trust me this once." Ezra took one last look at the beautiful picture they made, alone against the dark of night. Then he rose and turned to leave.

"Ezra, wait." The voice's tone was an order, not a request, so naturally it was Chris.

The gambler's pale jade eyes suddenly flooded with tears as they looked back to the brilliance of the fire. Ezra could only hope his new hat shaded them enough. Dear Lord, why did I have to discover this? I don't want to remember . . .

The next order was delivered in a gentler voice. "Come next to the fire and get yourself warm." Ezra skulked toward the campsite.

Vin studied the brightly clothed man with dawning understanding in his eyes. "He hurt ya, didn't he?" he asked softly.

Ezra's head shot up in surprise. "What?!"

"Ya've bin with a man 'fore, yerself, haven't ya? That's why ya watched."

Ezra narrowed his eyes at Vin. "I have done a few experiments . . ." He tried to remain casual about it, but the long-suppressed memories chose that moment to ambush him. He lowered his head until the brim of his hat shadowed his face. He didn't want to continue, but the words tumbled out before he could stop them. "It was during the war . . . a matter of convenience, nothing more. Women really didn't follow our regiment . . . most of the time we kept to the deep woods. Keith was somewhat . . . embarrassed by the whole proceedings, even though he wanted me."

Both Chris and Vin heard the emphasis on the word "wanted" – not cared for. Vin barely restrained himself from reaching out to gambler. Chris silently ground his fist into the dirt, determined not to say a thing until Ezra had finished. They might never get another chance to hear what he had to say if they interrupted him now.

The gambler's voice dropped to a breath above a whisper. "It was never rape. It felt all right enough and I wanted it, but Keith felt . . . disgusted with himself for desiring me. He made me stay quiet, and I do not just mean refraining from mentioning our little . . . arrangement. It hurt at first, and I couldn't scream. Then, it felt like heaven, and I couldn't cry out."

"Jesus," Chris breathed, sickened. The bastard was damn lucky he wasn't present at the moment. He'd kill him for what he'd done to his friend.

"I was never sure where love was with my mother or other women, but I can tell you where it sure as hell wasn't. You . . . you were both so beautiful. I'm sorry I watched so long, but I . . . just never expected to see such devotion." The dark head dipped lower as Ezra repeated hoarsely. "I'm sorry."

"Ez, no." Vin's eyes were large and soft. "Ya have nuthin' to be sorry fer. We understand." Chris simply nodded his agreement, his eyes filled with an unreadable emotion. "Seein' Chris and me musta hurt. Then Chris had ta go and threaten ya . . ."

Chris looked as if he was about to say something, but the gambler spoke up before he could utter a word. "I know why you didn't want me mentioning this to any of the others. Though I know that what you feel for one another is not wrong, some of the others might not understand. You're afraid of losing the respect they have for you."

"Thank you, Ezra," the blond gunman murmured, moving over to Ezra's side and dropping an arm over his shoulders. The gambler was somewhat taken aback by the affection of the gesture, but he didn't pull away. The warmth and closeness felt too good. "And never, ever think that we don't trust you. You've proven yourself more than enough these past months. And you may not know it, but I was afraid of losin' your respect, too."

"And you, Mr. Tanner?"

"Just Vin, right now, Ezra," the tracker requested, his voice soft. "I didn't know how ya'd react if ya found out I's hidin' this big a secret from ya. I figgered ya might not trust me anymore."

"You are one of the most trustworthy folk I know, Vin. Have a little faith in this old Southern boy."

"Hardly old," Vin said with a small grin, nudging him.

Chris' lips curved in a smile of his own. "Besides, Vin's shy. Worries too much about gettin' caught." Ezra was sure that Vin would have swatted his lover if he hadn't been sitting between them.

Ezra rubbed a finger over lips that had gone dry. "Neither of you have anything to be shy about, if I may so. As I said, such beauty is rare."

Vin did something completely unexpected then. He leaned over and lightly kissed Ezra on the cheek. "It's bin a long time since anyone other than Chris gave me a compliment like that."

"What Chris tells you is all that should matter," Ezra murmured, rubbing his cheek, not trying to rub the kiss away, but trying to capture the gesture in his amazement.

"You're right, Ez," Chris interjected, a smile on his face that showed through in his eyes. "But it was awful nice of you to say so." On impulse, he ran his index finger down the back of the gambler's neck.

"Oooh." The sound bordered on both moan and sigh.

"A little sensitive, are we?" Chris' smile deepened. "Vin, you know something?"

"What?" The look in Vin's eyes made the decision for Chris.

Raking a considering look over the gambler, Chris continued, "I think we spooked Ezra when we discovered him because he don't realize how much we appreciate him."

"Sounds 'bout right, Chris," Vin agreed, running an appraising look of his own over the red-coated figure. "As much trouble as his tricks sometimes cause, as annoyin' as them five dollar words of his can be, he still don't realize we'd walk through fire fer him."

Ezra's crystal green eyes darted between the two men in surprise. "You would?" The disbelief in his tone saddened the other two men.

Resting a hand on the gambler's knee, Vin asked, "Ain't we done it enough? We love ya, Ez, and we'd never want ta lose yer friendship, yer trust, or yer respect."

Ezra's eyes were brimming again, this time with joy and reassurance. "Or my love? It has been hard to admit to myself, but I love you, too. All of you. No one has ever made me feel I belonged so much as the six of you."

"An' ya trust me an' Chris?"

"All of you."

Vin glanced at Chris. Chris nodded. "Then do ya want ta stay with us tonight?"

The green eyes grew almost impossibly wide. "You gentlemen can't possibly mean – ?!"

"Seems to me it's been too long since someone made you feel loved," Chris stated softly, tilting Ezra's new hat back off his head so his face could be clearly seen.

"'Sides, takin' up all them 'beautiful moments' would jist make us greedy." Vin smiled. "I figger the world owes ya some happiness, after what happened ta ya. If this would make ya happy?"

Stunned, Ezra could only stammer out, "You have, ah, my assurance that it would."

"Would it?" Chris growled as he slung Ezra's hat to the ground and immediately enveloped the gambler's earlobe between his lips.

Blood shot through Ezra's veins like liquid lightning. Vin ran long, gentle fingers down the side of his face, momentarily stealing the pleasure of Chris' now rhythmic sucking on Ezra's ear. Ezra sighed softly, the quiet sound approaching a moan.

"Looks like ya actually got the man speechless, Chris," Vin said, running a furtive hand down the expanse of his lover's back.

The gunslinger didn't look up as he released Ezra's ear for a short moment. "Speechless, but not quiet, Vin. You don't have to worry with us, Ez. Hell, you can scream if you have a mind to. No one will hear any of us all the way out here." Chris' breath puffed over Ezra's dampened skin and stirred his hair.

Ezra flinched a little. "I . . . appreciate that, Chris. Damn, that feels odd."

"Don't like it, Ezra?" Chris blew a warm stream of air along the nape of Ezra's neck. "You could have fooled me."

"Oh, no, no, I can assure you, I quite enjoy . . ." Ezra's mind let go of his train of thought as he felt Vin's palms against his chest, caressing him through his layers of clothing. With an effort, he finished his sentence. "It's calling you by your first names that I find strange."

"Stranger if you didn't. Don't be afraid, Ez." Chris gently turned Ezra's face so that he could look directly at the gambler. Vin was also looking at Ezra, his eyes shining as he leaned over Chris' shoulder. "We ain't gonna hurt you."

"Only if you leave me now," Ezra whispered with raw honesty. "I've brought up too many bad memories to want to be alone with them tonight." Ezra tried to embrace them both at once, but only managed to topple all three of them over.

Chris straightened up out of the tangled embrace and cupped Ezra's chin in his hands. "We wouldn't do that."

Ezra parted his lips and breathed out softly, knowing that Chris was about to kiss him. He didn't know what to anticipate, having seen Chris kiss Vin with artful delicacy, but knowing how aggressive the taciturn blond man was.

The softness Chris saw on Ezra's face undid him. He closed his eyes and let his mouth sink into Ezra's lips, fitting there like links in a long-forgotten chain. There was warmth and pressure, deep and intense, but no movement. Chris let his hands journey into Ezra's thick, dark hair, attempting to hold the moment as he held his new lover in place. It was Ezra who decided to break the stillness.

He licked a bit at Chris' lips, murmuring an entreaty for entry. Once given, Ezra licked his way into Chris' mouth, the taste of tobacco and whisky that were so typically Chris sweetened by the unexpected flavor of sassafras. Ezra tasted of the lemon candy sticks he was forever "liberating" from the General Store, sweet and tart. Clean. Chris moved his mouth, sucking each of Ezra's lips in turn before allowing himself to fall back. Hugging the younger man close, Chris shifted him around until Ezra was leaning back against his chest.

Ezra found his hands occupied as Chris guided them towards the buttons of his coat. The both of them worked to undo the garment at the same time. "Let's see what you've been hidin' beneath all these fancy clothes, Ez," came Chris' growl behind him.

Vin paused in his cat-like lapping of the glistening motes of sweat from Chris' shoulders. He feathered a hand through Chris' hair, turning his head to whisper directly into the blond man's ear. "Don't be greedy now."

The tracker moved from his position behind Chris to in front of both men until he was straddling Ezra's outstretched legs. Vin started his own tender assault on the gambler by kissing across his brow then down over his eyelids. He licked into a kiss from the corner of Ezra's mouth, which opened readily for his invasion. Ezra moaned. Vin tasted of wild honey, which grew sweeter the longer Ezra sucked on his tongue. A shard of disappointment pierced him when he had to move to shrug out of his clothing, since the movement denied him the opportunity to run his hands through Vin's long hair, but he hoped he would be able to later.

Ezra suddenly found his arms freed. His shirt, vest, and jacket were miraculously open, thanks to Chris' deft hands, and had been unceremoniously pulled from his body. The feel of Chris' fingers touching his bare skin left him unable to care where the expensive garments landed. Shuddering in pleasure, Ezra leaned back into the blond's strong body, trusting him to hold him up, and let the other man's hands roam freely over his torso and arms.

Vin smiled at the vision his two lovers' made, reaching out to touch the gambler's bared flesh himself. Ezra's skin was as fair and smooth as a bowlful of cream. He had half a mind to play the part of "cat" and lap the gambler up.

Chris and Ezra, however, were of a different opinion. The gunslinger spread his hands out over Ezra's chest in a gesture that clearly said "Mine . . . for now." Ezra, in the meantime, took a moment to admire Vin, running sensitive fingertips over the light layer of golden-brown stubble on the other man's jaw. He observed closely how the sharp blue eyes sharpened further in pleasure, widened, and finally closed. Vin dropped a stroke of his tongue to the speeding pulse in Ezra's neck, wetting the tender surfaces of his throat.

Chris ran careless nails from Ezra's navel to a spot just below Vin's mouth where he was savoring Ezra's neck. Ezra gasped, overwhelmed by the parallel assaults. Needing to touch and caress as he himself was being touched, he finally took the opportunity to stroke his hands into the shock of Vin's hair. It was like Paradise had been called into being to flow against his hands. Ezra skimmed by an ear, and this elicited a quiet hum from the tracker.

Extraordinary. Ezra hid the devilish smirk he'd felt coming on beneath a moan as Chris' fingers toyed with one of his nipples. His breath escaping him in quick pants, the gambler nevertheless remained focused enough to experimentally stroke the outer rims of Vin's ears, just to make sure he'd heard correctly. Yes, a definite purring groan, now against his collarbone, as the tracker had moved his attentions downward.

Ezra tightened a fist in the silken mane, making Vin cry out. "Damn it, Ezra, that hurt!" he complained as he straightened a bit to ease the pressure on his hair. The younger man was silenced as Ezra closed his lips over his earlobe. Thoroughly enjoying the mewling sounds Vin was making, Ezra closed his eyes and swept his tongue behind it. Vin clutched at Ezra's back, at Chris' convenient hand.

Having just now come to understand that Chris and Vin had meant what they'd said about making him feel loved, Ezra almost couldn't take the excitement. Mentally chuckling to himself, he decided to see just how much they would let him get away with. As he tortured Vin's ears with kisses, every so often turning the tracker's head when he felt the opposite side needed attention, he skimmed his hands over Vin's body with the touch of a light breeze. It was difficult for him to remain completely on task, since Chris had taken to giving him miniscule bites that sweetly stung his neck and shoulder blades.

Ezra's actions became even more erratic when Chris eased his roughened hands over Ezra's still-clothed thighs, inching toward his trouser buttons. Ezra allowed Chris the liberty of undoing a single closure before grasping one of the offending hands and swirling his tongue over the callused fingers.

"No," he whispered to Chris, the puff of breath sending glassy shards of sensation through Vin's sensitized ear, causing him to moan. "It would be terribly rude of you to demand that I undress before you did, Chris." The gambler smirked lazily. By the time he'd finished his sentence, Vin's breathing was ragged.

Chris merely shook his head, pleased despite himself that Ezra's mischievous nature had replaced the downcast attitude of before. Respecting the gambler's wishes, he settled for caressing the warm magnetic skin of his new lover, hoping his current lover wouldn't suffer – much – for that mischievousness. Chris let his frustrations fly with a soft growl and a push of his hips against Ezra's backside, just to make sure the other two remembered there were indeed three of them there. The assurance that they were aware came quickly. Vin rapidly stole one of Chris' hand to nibble on his fingers, and Ezra leaned more snugly back into the gunslinger's embrace, sighing Chris' name.

After languishing a moment in the gunman's expert touch, Ezra realized there were urgencies that he had to attend. He took Vin's lips with his own to give the poor man's badly abused ears a little respite. Then he fanned his hands over Vin's chest, much the way he would fan a deck of cards, stroking the glowing satin flesh in admiration. Vin's nipples were pink-gold rosebuds amid a golden sea. Ezra touch them gently with the pads of his fingers, as if he were examining the most delicate petals imaginable. He regained his resolve as he felt the surprising softness of the sprinkling of tawny hair on Chris' torso press against him.

Ezra let his hand drop. Almost without his volition, it insinuated itself between Vin's thighs. Ezra's fingernails skipped their way over the burning erection, catching drops of moisture as they did so. Vin reached for Ezra's shoulders or beyond him to Chris'. Chris, while still keeping his hips pressed firmly against Ezra, leaned back with a smirk as if to say, "You tried to take him first, now you're stuck with him."

Vin growled in agony, trying to press up against the welcome tightness of Ezra's hand. Ezra said nothing, merely transfixed Vin's gaze with his silvery-green one. His free hand held Vin's body in check, pressing against the trembling muscles of his well-defined stomach. Restrained only by that, Vin leaned back on his arms and arched into the gambler's caress.

Eyes hooded with lids and the shadows the flames cast, Ezra allowed Vin a moment to catch his breath, nipping his own fingers delicately to taste Vin. Wide blue eyes stared up at him pleadingly. Giving in, Ezra placed his hand palm down on Vin's cock, stroking slowly as he watched the other man writhe in pleasure. His skin really was lovely, like silk, and the feel of it alone was more valuable than the knowledge of how deliciously he was tormenting Vin.

Ezra's satisfaction left him abruptly as felt Chris' hand slide down into the gap created by the opened button, slipping down toward the inevitable. "Chris," Ezra fumbled at his wrist with his free hand. "That just is not fair."

"And what . . . yer doin' to me . . . is?" Vin whimpered.

"Perhaps not," Ezra mulled the situation over a moment before making his decision. "But we should be able to easily ascertain if this is more to your liking." With a surprising amount of strength, Ezra pushed Vin flat. He played his tongue around the younger man's navel delicately, a smile dancing in his eyes. Vin jolted, but Chris scrambled to his side and held both his hands, as much to help Ezra as to comfort his lover.

As Chris quietly and deliberately breathed on Vin's neck, Ezra leaned down further. He nuzzled the crisp curls for a minute before taking Vin into his mouth. The tracker's moan hitched in his throat and his knuckles shone white as he gripped Chris' hand. Encouraged by Vin's reactions, Ezra increased his efforts, laving the rounded head with his tongue, never leaving his lips anywhere too long. Vin tilted himself up, snarling urgency. Ezra continued to tongue him leisurely until he heard Vin whimper brokenly.

Only then did his tormenters offer a respite, Chris stroking Vin's hair, letting him rest against his chest, Ezra swallowing his length almost entirely. The warm, sweet suction took Vin to release quickly. He called out softly, to both Chris and Ezra, then he fell bonelessly back against Chris, emptied of his strength.

Ezra leaned over the younger man, pausing to drop a quick kiss on his damp forehead, before he grasped Chris' hand, running his fingers through those of the gunslinger. He kissed Chris' palm gently, using his tongue to trace over the lifelines. Lifting his eyes to meet Chris' smoldering gaze, he murmured huskily, "As you know, Chris, I do enjoy a good game. Now my query would be, do you like to play?"

Chris' grin was quite obscene. "Of course." He gently let Vin down on the bedroll, running his fingers one last time through his tracker's hair before turning his full attention to the gambler. Unable to resist the want clearly written on the normally expressionless face, Chris pulled Ezra into his arms and began to nuzzle and suck at Ezra's neck, tasting the warmth and savoring the younger man's unique scent.

The gambler's fingers, busy and dexterous as always, undid Chris' trousers and eased them down as far over the slim hips as he could. Chris turned slightly away from the other man to finish the job, giving Ezra a delicious view of the soft curves of Chris' ass, a sight a bit incongruous with the lithe hardness of the rest of his body. Ezra couldn't resist sliding his palms up Chris' backside, up his spine, tracing delicately along Chris' ribcage. For the first time, Ezra realized how slender the man he saw as "leader" actually was. He turned Chris by gently pushing his shoulder.

Chris leaned down and opened Ezra's lips with his own, letting his tongue steal into Ezra's mouth. The gunslinger's hands were strong and sure as they traveled Ezra's body. The gambler whimpered softly as Chris' touch found a particularly sensitive spot under his navel. Ezra clutched Chris' honey-colored hair, sighing softly, then rested his hands on the slender shoulders as he was stripped bare.

Vin's eyes glowed like the fire that burned before them as he struggled upward on one elbow. He watched as the forms before him seemed to meld into one another. The two of them rubbed against each other, silken circles of movement that brought fevered heights of pleasure. The night air filled with the heat of their sighs and moans. Ezra became a bit insistent and his hand, damp with sweat and his and Chris' essences, began stroking Chris, demanding his release.

"Chris, I want . . ."

"Yes." The gunslinger groaned deeply, fiercely as he gave in. Ezra gathered the evidence of Chris' pleasure to prepare him. Chris growled as the clever fingers slid back and forth inside him, squeezing his eyes shut. They snapped open abruptly as Ezra entered, slowly, tentatively. Chris licked his lips and sighed out, "Ohhh."

The sigh became an agonized snarl when Vin inched over and licked Chris' shaft into his mouth, craving the sweetness that already lay on his lover's skin and that yet to be shed. Ezra leaned into Chris' back, holding him as if he'd slip away. Chris opened to him willingly, more needy than Ezra would have ever imagined. The strong, slender frame weathered the storm of Ezra's hungry movements as Vin's thorough, expert tongue slicked over Chris with an equal lack of mercy.

Chris bit his lip and moaned loudly as release shattered him, pouring his strength into Vin, who drank him like wine. A moment later, Chris' trembling brought Ezra to an end, one that brought overwhelmed, joyous tears.

The three men carefully disentangled from each other, falling back in an exhausted heap on the bedroll. Ezra rested his head, now looking uncharacteristically shaggy and disheveled, on Vin's chest. Chris traced lazy figures along Ezra's breastbone, his head pillowed in the hollow of the gambler's shoulder. They lay there quietly, stretching themselves in the cool glow of the stars and the warmth of the dwindling fire.

Ezra eventually broke the peaceful silence. Softly, he inquired. "Mr. Larabee, Mr. Tanner?"

Chris cuffed him lightly. "Ezra, it was "Oh God, Chris!" a second ago."

Ezra chuckled, distracted a moment by Vin's hand in his hair. "Thank you."

The only response from the other two was soft, affectionate chuckling and the gentle caress of lips on his forehead and collarbone. Ezra smiled in contentment and straightened out into a more comfortable position. He felt the other two curl up on either side of him and find comfortable positions of their own. Together, they slept to await the morning.

The end.

The End