Chris Larabee slowly opened his green eyes to a foreign, yet somehow familiar room. As he glanced about, a smile crossed his once habitually dark face. He remembered now where he was. More importantly, he recalled the events of the day before that led him to this room in the back of the Clarion.
The strong, handsome gunfighter glanced to his side to make sure that it was true. There, sleeping peacefully, surrounded by her halo of golden hair was the woman he had made love to the night before, Mary, his wife, Mary Travis-Larabee.
Mary had been a gift from God for Chris. She was the only person who had dared to reach into his blackened and scarred soul and pull out the man he once was. After his first wife and son had died in a fire almost four years ago, Chris had sworn he would never let another person that close again. Little did he know that he was going to meet an angel on earth that could and would change his mind.
Chris smiled unconsciously as he recalled the first time he had seen Mary Travis. She had stormed out into the middle of a band of drunken cowboys who were looking to lynch Nathan. Gun in hand, Mary had tried to stop them all by herself. Chris had been immediately attracted to that kind of fire. But God knows she had annoyed him at first. Chris glanced over at Mary again and silently laughed. Who would have guessed that this proper, lady-like widow would be lying beside a self-proclaimed "bad element" a little more than a year after their first meeting?
Chris decided that Mary had slept for long enough. They had chosen not to go on a honeymoon because they had wanted to spend the last few weeks of Billy's summer vacation with him. In the autumn he would have to return to Judge Travis' home to attend school. Four Corners was still about a year from having an established school. Chris could hardly wait for it to be ready. He hated the thought of not seeing Billy for three months almost as much as Mary did. But then again, it would give the Larabees a chance to be newlyweds for a little while.
Chris rolled towards Mary to kiss her and awaken her from her slumber. The gunfighter felt something scurry across his bare chest. He glanced down and saw the chain that Mary had given him yesterday. At the end of the chain hung a narrow band of gold; his wedding ring.
+ + + + + + +
It had been a real struggle for Chris to court Mary. He was still haunted by the ghosts of Sarah and Adam. Despite Mary's most valiant efforts to chase away the demons, Chris never could completely shake the fear that he might lead her and Billy to their deaths. In the end though, he could not deny his feelings for Mary any longer and decided to try to strike a compromise that would make them all happy.
+ + + + + + +
It had been just a little over a month ago that Chris had stood in the front office of this very same building, trembling with fear; fear that she would say no and fear that she would say yes.
It had been a sudden decision that Chris had made while sitting on the porch of the saloon. He was watching Mary sweep the front steps of the Clarion, mesmerized by her beauty. The gunfighter decided that he could not suppress his feelings any longer. He had been trying to come up with a way to tell Mary how he felt for a few days now. He was not certain how he would say it, but he hoped something would come to him when he approached her. Chris strolled across with long self-assured strides. He wished that he felt the same way that he walked.
Mary looked up to see the man in black approaching her at a quick pace "Is something wrong, Chris?" She stopped sweeping and brushed a loose piece of blond hair behind her ear as she watched Chris come up the steps. Without saying a word, Chris pushed Mary inside the office, gently with a hand on her back. He silently shut the door and turned to face Mary with nervous eyes. "What is wrong, Chris? Oh my God! Did something happen to Billy?" Chris raised a callused had to silence her. Then he took a deep breath and exhaled slowly. Finally he began to speak
"Mary, I love you more than words can describe, and I want to be a father to Billy and a husband to you. I do not want to put the two of you in danger just to satisfy my wants, though." It was the first time Chris had allowed himself to put love and Mary into the same thought.
Mary was shocked. This statement seemed to come out of no where. Chris had only kissed her once. One night during a knock-down, drag-out fight about her riding unaccompanied to Bitter Creek for some shopping, Chris had flashed his beautiful green eyes at her helplessly, knowing he could not win the argument. Not verbally anyhow. He simply had whispered, "I just do not want anything to happen to you," and then gently pressed his lips to hers. The kiss had taken her breath away because it had told her so much about the man in black. Obviously though, Mary had not gotten all the information out of Chris' soul. He had been on the warpath since she had almost married Gerard. Mary knew that it had scared him to think that she might marry another man, but she never expected this, not this soon. It didn't really matter, though. Mary had known for some time what she would say if the gunfighter ever managed the courage to ask. He hadn't actually asked her to marry him though. She smiled to herself. Mary knew that Chris was doing the best he could with the limited amount of emotions he had allowed himself since Sarah and Adam's deaths. "Chris, I love you, too. I want to spend the rest of our lives together, loving each other and raising Billy and any other children that might come along."
Chris raised his eyebrow and for a moment his green eyes sparkled with the promises and dreams of a happy future. But, too quickly, the clouds returned, reminding him of what had happened before.
"Mary I want that too, but I'm afraid. I don't think I can do it again. I tried not to love you because I knew it would come to this."
"Come to what, Chris?"
"A showdown between our desires and the past that I carry around like a lead bullet in my heart."
"Don't you think that I am scared, too? Isn't it possible that my past might worry me as well?" Mary was going to fight him tooth and nail now. He had asked her to marry him. There was no way she was going to let Chris Larabee back down and give in to the demons that said not to commit to loving another human being. "I lost one husband. I am not too keen on losing another."
"I am not going to die, Mary."
"Are you going to stop taking foolish risks, stop facing down the men that ride through this town, stop thinking you are invincible?" Mary paused and then breathlessly whispered "Stop being you?" Chris stared at her in pain and disbelief. He suddenly realized that he was not the only one who had demons. "The same things that attract me to you, scare me to death. I love that you stand up for those who cannot stand for themselves, but when you walk down the center of the street, firing at a charging madman like Morgan Coltrane, I want to throttle you in the worst way."
Chris scowled and then smiled. He wanted to marry her so badly and he knew that she wanted it to work too. Maybe they could make a deal. "How about if I promise to stay the same gunslinger who fights for the little guy, but also promise to stop acting like I could never get hurt?"
Mary looked suspiciously at the handsome man in black in front of her. This was far too easy. "In exchange for what?"
"You do not change your name and I do not wear a ring. That way it will be harder for the trouble that rides through this town, looking to hurt me, to find the weak spot in my defenses."
It seemed so easy for him to suggest. Mary stared directly into Chris' emerald eyes. He could see the fire welling up in her sapphire ones and knew he had just made a mistake. She stepped up to him, inches from his face and slowly and coolly whispered, "Why don't I just become your mistress?"
Chris stepped back, physically struck by her words. "That is not what I meant, Mary. I want to be your husband in every sense of the word. I just don't want the drifters that pass through town to be able to match you to me. It puts you in more danger just to be Mrs. Chris Larabee. There is no need to advertise the fact to the whole world."
"I want to advertise it. We already do advertise our love for each other in our actions. You don't think that if the men who ride through town paid attention for a minute they could figure out that there is something between us? We are not exactly subtle. Besides, if I do not take your name, it makes it appear that I am ashamed of my husband. And I am far from ashamed of you, Christopher Larabee."
Chris looked at her for a second. No one ever called him Christopher; not since his ma had died. He knew he could not win this battle. He wondered for a second if he ever would win an argument with the beautiful woman who stood before him. "Okay then, Mrs. Larabee-to-be, what about the other part of the proposition?"
"That is your decision." Chris could see the hurt in her eyes and knew that she really wanted him to wear a wedding band. Hell, he thought, I want to wear one too, but it is overly obvious to the men I fight, and their gangs.
Mary had been watching him. When Chris had come into the Clarion and proclaimed his love for her, she thought this would be the happiest day of her life. But now, they were just hurting each other with their words. She stepped close to him and buried her face in his firm chest. His arms encircled her and she pulled away slightly to look up at him.
"Maybe you could wear the ring on a chain."
Chris smiled down at her. It was a definite compromise and a good idea. "Right next to my heart - near you."
+ + + + + + +
Chris whispered gently into his wife's ear, in a very sexy, breathy voice. "Time to wake up Mrs. Larabee."
Mary, still not totally awake and trapped somewhere in a dream replied, "Can't you take care of the baby, Chris?"
Chris smiled. One night, after they had told the whole town that they planned to wed, Mary had told Chris that she often had dreams about being Mrs. Larabee and having children with him. He liked the idea and hoped that they were blessed soon. At least Chris thought he wanted that. "Not yet Mary, but if you would wake up, we could work on it."
Mary was suddenly aware of what was going on around her and opened her eyes to see her husband glancing wistfully and wantonly at her. "Chris...it is...morning."
"Yeah, so?"
Mary smiled and kissed Chris. She loved his passion and spontaneity. Even after just one day, she had a feeling that this marriage was going to be a lot different from her and Stephen's; a lot more exciting anyhow.
+ + + + + + +
Two hours later Mary awoke again to find Chris spooned against her back, one hand holding her's and the other supporting his head as he watched her doze.
"You are so beautiful," Chris cooed.
"Thank you," Mary purred back. "You aren't such a bad sight either." Mary got up from their bed and got dressed while Chris watched her body appreciatively. "You promised to stop being foolish, not to stop being a gunfighter. Get up."
"Yes, dear."
+ + + + + + +
A few minutes later when the couple emerged from the bedroom, they were startled to see Billy sitting at the kitchen table, sketching on a sheet of paper.
"Mornin' Momma. Chris."
"Good morning sweetheart."
"Mornin' pard'. I thought Buck was going to take you fishin' this mornin'."
"He and Josiah had to ride out to the Smith ranch and see about a robbery. Nathan is tending to Mrs. Jones because she burned herself. Ezra and Vin went to Eagle Bend to meet the Treasury wagon. JD is on patrol. Mrs. Standish offered to watch me, but she is odd. She said something about teachin' me a trade. I decided to come home and play quietly until you two woke up."
Mary smiled at her son and then at her husband. She never dreamed that she would ever have such an extended family to depend on, or that Billy would ever be so comfortable with that many different people. Not after witnessing the death of his father at the hands of a prominent member of the town. "Well, have you had breakfast?"
"No."
"Then I'll make something for all of us."
Chris sat down at the table beside Billy. "What did ya draw?"
Billy held up a picture of the Clarion with a bunch of figures in front of it. There were six to one side of the door and three to the other. "This is you and me and Momma and over here is Buck, Vin, Ezra, Nathan, Josiah, and JD."
"That's beautiful Billy." Mary beamed from the stove where wonderful smells were beginning to gather in the air.
Chris smiled at Billy. Just then there was a knock at the door and Chris saw Buck stick his head in.
"Sorry about that, Chris. Tom Smith rode into town swearin' that he had been robbed and that we had to get the bandits. Turned out his son took the horse out for a ride without leavin' a note."
Chris glanced at Billy and said, "Don't you ever do that to us. Got it?"
"Sure, Chris." Billy gazed lovingly at his idol. He was so happy that Mary had accepted Chris' proposal.
"Have you had breakfast yet, Buck?"
"No ma'am I haven't."
"Well then come and join us."
"May I also perhaps impose on you for some of that divine smelling cuisine that you are concocting Mrs. Trav...er...Larabee?"
Mary and Chris were both shocked to hear the distinctive southern drawl of Ezra Standish. It was not often that Ezra came by the Clarion on his own accord. As much as he felt that the other men and Mary had become his family, the con man still thought that it was better for him to spend his time at a card table. "Why yes Mr. Standish, and please call me Mary."
+ + + + + + +
Before long the kitchen of the Clarion was filled not only with the aroma of delicious food, but also all seven men and Maude Standish, who had come to town for Chris and Mary's wedding.
"It was right nice of you to cook for all of us Miz. Larabee." Nathan smiled at the young woman who had finally taken her seat beside Chris. Billy was contentedly sitting in Chris' lap sharing a plate full of eggs and biscuits with his hero. Mary made a mental note that she would have to order more plates. She was sure these gatherings would be even more common now.
"Don't get me wrong. I love being Mrs. Chris Larabee," Mary spoke gently in her feminine way, "but I do wish you people would all call me Mary. It really is okay to do that."
"Safer that way too." Chris gave Mary a sideways glance and continued to share his breakfast with his newly acquired son.
+ + + + + + +
Slowly the Larabee's guests finished their meals and meandered out of the kitchen, each one thanking Mary. Billy jumped down off Chris' lap and ran to help his mother with the water for the dishes. Chris stretched his legs for a moment and then started carrying the plates to the sink.
"Why Mr. Larabee, I did not realize that you did menial domestic labor as well as cutting down the evil element where he stands." Ezra flashed his gold tooth at the gunfighter.
Buck chuckled heartily as he stood up. "Chris can be down right domestic with the right motivation."
"How crude, Mr. Wilmington." Ezra gave Buck a less than subtle shove. "I think we should leave this family in peace. We have intruded enough for one day."
Just then Mary made her way back to the kitchen with a bucket of water to wash to dishes. She was surprised to see Chris carrying plates and even more surprised when he took the bucket from her and poured the water. Even Stephen, who was from a very cultured and gentlemanly upbringing, never offered to help with the dishes. Chris lifted Billy up on a chair and handed him a dish towel. "You dry the dishes for your Momma and I'll put 'em away."
Mary was totally blown away by this statement, but before she could say a word, Billy asked Chris the one question she was not sure if the strong gunslinger could bear.
"Chris are you my pa now?"
Chris ruffled the boy's hair. "Technically, I am like your pa, but you can still call me Chris."
Billy looked thoughtfully from Chris to Mary and then questioned her. "Do you think Papa would mind if I called Chris my pa too?"
Tiny tears welled in Mary's eyes and she glanced at her husband questioningly. Chris was lost in his own thoughts, though. Billy's gentle voice, singing out the word "Papa," had sent Chris reeling back to the last time he had seen Adam alive. His son's words echoed in his head; "I love you, Papa." Suddenly Chris was jolted back to the present by Mary's honey-coated voice.
"I do not think that your Papa would mind, but I think that you had better ask Chris." Mary was not sure where he had just gone. She had seen the clouds come storming in and was certain that some demon was making the whole situation too uncomfortable for her husband.
Chris lifted Billy off the chair and sat down with the blond boy cradled in his arms. "I would love for you to call me your pa. I have one request though. Could you call me Daddy?" Billy looked questioningly at Chris, not upset by the request, but merely confused. "My little boy called me Papa and I would like to keep that life separate from the one I am making with you and your Momma."
Billy reached up and put his arms around Chris's neck. Glancing around the little boy's head as he returned the hug, Chris saw his wife silently shedding tears of joy. He stretched his arms beyond Billy's body to reach out to Mary. She came willing into his embrace, and the powerful gunfighter held in his arms all of his happiness in the world. It would have made anyone else laugh. The big, strong, and dangerous Chris Larabee trying to hide his own tears of joy as he gathered the pieces of his life together in a kitchen of a border town newspaper office.
ONE MONTH LATER
Mary awoke early in the morning. She did not feel well. She glanced over at her husband and then stumbled out of bed. She had just made it outside when she vomited all over. She sat down on the edge of the back porch and waited for the nausea to subside. Then she went inside. Mary rinsed her mouth and silently got dressed without waking Chris. He looked so peaceful sleeping there. She went out into the kitchen and began to make breakfast. She got out a big pan and started to crack some eggs. As they began to sizzle, another wave of nausea assaulted her. She managed to prevent the vomiting this time, but she had to sit down at the table. She glanced at the calendar. It had been a little more than a month since her and Chris had married. More importantly however, it was almost a week since her monthly should have come. She knew this feeling. When she had been pregnant with Billy, she could only cook about three things without becoming ill. She smiled to herself. Mary was pregnant with Chris Larabee's child. She set back to work, willing herself not to be sick while she made Chris' breakfast. Mary resolved not to tell her husband the good news until she had confirmed it. She hoped that Nathan would be able to help.
"Mornin', my love." Chris strutted from their bedroom dressed in a bright blue shirt. It had been almost two months since Chris Larabee had walked about town as the black-clad man that he once was. He was much happier now. Mary hoped that he remained that happy forever.
"Good morning, darling." In two strides Chris was by her side and had his arms around her.
"Take the pan off the stove and come back to bed," he whispered in her ear and then began to tempt her with a shower of soft kisses all over her face and neck.
"Chris Larabee!!! Get control of yourself. A proper lady does not do such things."
"One who married the 'bad element' does." Chris swept her up in his arms and began to carry her back to their bed. The motion was too much for Mary, though and she felt very sick. She struggled with her husband until he put her down, and then she sat in a chair attempting to regain composure. Chris looked hurt. She had never resisted before. He had always thought she enjoyed their spontaneous rendezvous. Since Billy had returned to Judge Travis' home, he had made a point of surprising her whenever possible. Chris loved the way Mary looked after they had made love in the afternoon. The sun streamed in around the curtains and shone on her golden hair making her look even more like an angel.
Mary could see the hurt in his eyes. "Do not get me wrong. I would love to go back to bed with you. I always do, but I have some errands to run today and I was planning on making dinner for all of you tonight."
To her ears, the excuse seemed lame, but Chris smiled at her, his ego somewhat restored. "Later then."
"Is that a promise or a threat, cowboy?"
+ + + + + + +
Once Mary had effectively managed to distract Chris with some errand in Eagle Bend, she went off to invite the men to dinner and to find Nathan.
"Nathan, I was wondering if you could help me?"
"Sure, Mz...er...Mary." Nathan had difficulty in calling her Mary. Until he had joined up with Chris and the others, he had never found it appropriate to call her by her Christian name. He was not sure that he liked it now, but the Larabees were close friends and he thought that he should since she had asked so nicely and Chris was so set on it being safer for her.
"I think that I may be pregnant, but I do not want to tell Chris until I am sure."
"Congratulations. But, Mary, you know I ain't no real doctor. Maybe you better go to Bitter Creek and see Doc O'Malley."
"I would like to know as soon as possible and there is no way Chris would let me go to Bitter Creek alone. I am not asking you to do anything. Couldn't you just maybe examine me and confirm it?"
"I 'pose so."
+ + + + + + +
"I can say that I'm pretty certain you and Chris are going to have a bundle of joy in a little while."
"Oh thank you, Nathan."
"Don't thank me. It was all the good Lord's work. Well maybe with a little help from you and Chris. He certainly will be happy to have another child."
"Yes, and Billy will have a sibling."
"Between your marriage and this, Chris ought to be just about whole again." Mary smiled for a second and then wordlessly exited Nathan's room. Suddenly it had hit Mary. Maybe Chris was not going to want a baby. He had only ever really said that he wanted kids once. Maybe he did not want to have another child; a child that might threaten to replace Adam in his heart. He had been able to keep Billy separate. Probably because Billy was not Chris' own flesh. What would he say to a new baby, though? Mary rushed back to the Clarion and shut the door. What if telling Chris she was pregnant only drove the clouds back into those green eyes that had been relatively clear for the past month?
"He will be happy. He has to be," she said quietly as she began to fuss about with the preparations for dinner.
"Who will be happy?" Chris emerged from the parlor shadows as Mary gasped in shock and dropped a bowl to the floor.
"You frightened me."
Chris bent down to pick up the pieces for her. "I'm sorry. I got back sooner than expected. I did not want to be away from my beautiful bride longer than necessary." Chris laid the pieces of the bowl onto the counter and then pulled Mary into his arms. He kissed her slowly and deeply in a way that promised that later he would make good on his statement from the morning. As they pulled apart, Chris questioned her again. "Who will be happy?"
"Uh...Billy. I ordered him a few things for Christmas."
"Oh." She knew Chris did not buy her story for one second, but she was saved by the intrusion of JD into their moment.
"Chris! Oh, I'm sorry."
"It's okay. What's wrong Kid?"
"Vin wants you to ride out to the old Jenkins' place with him. John Clarke came into town and he said he thought he saw squatters."
"Okay. I'll be at the livery in two minutes. Saddle up Storm for me." JD trotted out of the Clarion and Chris turned his full attention to Mary again. "We will talk later, when it is just the two of us." With that said, Chris kissed her and strolled out of the kitchen.
"Be careful," she called after him. Then, speaking aloud to herself, she added, "We will talk later, Chris Larabee." She gently patted her stomach and added, "just the three of us."
+ + + + + + +
Chris returned a couple hours before dinner to find Mary soaking in a tub of water crying softly to herself. While he had been away, she had worked herself into a delirious mess. Mary was totally convinced that he would not want this child and would become distant forever. She knew that he would stay around to support her and the child, but she feared that he would never love her as much as he did the first month of their marriage. As Chris strolled into the room and glanced at his beautiful wife in the tub she continued to sniffle. She did not notice her husband until he came over and began to scrub her back.
"Mary?"
"Oh. Chris, I did not hear you come in."
"Please tell me what is bothering you."
"It is nothing." Chris walked around the side of the tub, knelt down and cupped his hand under her chin.
"Those tears ain't nothin'. Come on. Get out of that bathtub and talk to me."
Wordlessly Mary stepped out of the tub and Chris wrapped a towel around her slender frame. He took another towel and began to dry her golden hair while they walked into their bedroom. As she dressed she glanced uneasily at Chris.
"Mary, did something happen? Please tell me what is bothering you." Mary sat down on the bed beside Chris and began to sob uncontrollably.
"I was so happy this morning when I discovered that it might be true and then when Nathan confirmed it I was thrilled, but then I realized that maybe you would not be happy. I am afraid to tell you because I do not want those demons to come back."
"Tell me what?" Chris was very nervous. He had only ever seen Mary this upset once and that was when Billy had run off. Horrible thoughts were running through the gunfighter's head. Suddenly Mary turned and bored her sapphire eyes directly into Chris' emerald ones.
"I'm pregnant." Chris almost threw his wife to the floor as he jumped about and yelled. He hugged Mary close to him and kissed her until he could taste tears mixed with the kisses. He pulled her away and saw tears of joy streaming from her eyes.
"You really are happy?" Chris could not believe the question.
"Why wouldn't I be?"
"I was afraid you would think I was trying to replace Adam." The sound of his son's name gave Chris a temporary flash of pain, but he knew that his and Mary's child would never replace Adam; he hoped.
"If I did not want a baby, do you think I would make love to you so often?"
Mary looked at Chris with a look that plainly said "That is not why you make love to me." Chris laughed at her expression and kissed her again.
"We will have to tell everyone at dinner. We should take the stage on Friday and see Billy, too." Mary could not believe how excited Chris was. Finally she felt that she could enjoy some of the excitement again, too. As she made the final preparations for dinner, Mary hummed a lullaby to herself.
+ + + + + + +
Chris sat in the parlor for a few minutes reflecting on what had just happened. He was going to be a father, again. He recalled the day that Sarah had told him that they were going to have their first child. She had cried, too. They had been married for a little more than two years and Sarah was sure that she could not have children. She had worried and fretted so that when they received the good news, she could do nothing, but sob. Chris chased away those memories now though. It was a new day. He was going to be a parent; this time with Mary. He could hardly believe it. Would this baby really fill the hole the Adam had left? Suddenly Chris felt very guilty. He could never forget his son; he wouldn't. Chris got up and meandered into the kitchen to help Mary.
+ + + + + + +
Mary was lifting a heavy pan from the stove to sit it on the table.
"Put that down." Mary was startled by Chris' booming voice. "You are in no condition to be lifting such heavy things."
"I am the same woman I was this morning. I can still do the things I did before. I am not going to break." In some ways Mary was enraged, but in other ways she was flattered. Sarah must have trained him well.
"I want you to take good care of yourself. I am right here. There is no reason why I cannot help you."
Mary was about to argue, but the men were beginning to arrive.
"We will tell them before we eat," Mary whispered to Chris in a conspirator's tone, who smiled the smile of a proud father.
+ + + + + + +
Once Mary had spooned out food to all the men, she stood alongside Chris' chair. The gunslinger stood up and wrapped his arm around his wife's waist. "I have an announcement to make. Actually we both do."
The six other men turned curious eyes to Chris and Mary. Each one wondered what the couple was up to.
"We are going to have a baby." Chris smiled a Cheshire grin again and pulled Mary closer to kiss the top of her head. The six men all glanced at each other in disbelief and then each rose to hug Mary and shake Chris' hand. Congratulations were passed around and the proud gunfighter quietly thanked Nathan for his role in the scheme of things.
+ + + + + + +
The rest of the meal passed with the air of a celebration. There was much arguing among the men about who should be the godfather. Mary and Chris just laughed and glanced at each other, having a silent conversation. The parents had not had much time to think about such things either. Mary thought that Buck probably had the most right to the title, but also knew that Chris did not wish to divide the men.
"How about you all take on the title of uncle?" Mary was forever the peacemaker and Chris loved her for that.
The men seemed to agree with this bargain and the meal finished with little bickering. As Mary cleared the table, Chris started to help.
"I will do it. Go spend time with the others. I will be fine."
Buck tugged at Chris' arm. "Let 'er do it. It's a mother thing. Come outside and talk to me, pard'." The two men walked out into the moonlight which shone on to the back porch of the Clarion. Chris sat on the steps in the very same place that Mary had sat that morning. Buck could tell that something was bothering his old friend, but he tried to lighten the moment anyway. "That was some mighty fast shootin', ya old war dog."
Chris looked confused for a second and then smiled at the crude comment. It was so like Buck to say something like that. Chris was still worried about forgetting Adam though.
"What's botherin' ya, Chris?" Buck wanted his friend to be happy, but he knew that it was hard for the gunfighter.
"When Mary told me, I was thrilled. I was truly happy. Then I started to think...about the, the past. Mary thought I would be mad her for being pregnant. She thought I would think she was trying to replace Adam. I know she is not, but sometimes I get to worryin'...."
"Worryin' that you might forget Adam?"
Chris looked at his best friend and drew a ragged breath. "Yes."
It was a one-word statement of everything that the most dangerous gunfighter in the territory feared. "You won't. You can't, Chris. He may move to the back of your mind, but Adam will never be gone. He and Sarah would want ya to be happy. Why don't you let yourself be happy? You certainly have made Mary and Billy happy. Now let yourself in on the pleasure." Buck smiled at Chris and the gunslinger nodded. He got up and went back into the kitchen. Buck walked off the porch and around to the front to talk to the others, satisfied that he had helped Chris.
+ + + + + + +
"Mary?"
"Yes, dear." Mary was just finishing the dishes and was surprised when she turned and saw her husband crying.
"I am so happy that we are going to have a baby. I wanted you to know that."
"I do know that, Chris."
"No, I do not think that you do. I did not really know until a few minutes ago when Buck made me understand that I could have a past and a future. I love you Mary and I want to have a whole house full of children with you."
Mary laughed aloud. "Let's just get through this one first. I think she will fill up this house nicely."
Chris eyed Mary thoughtfully. "She?" Mary blushed. "I guess it would not be so bad having a little girl. She better not look anything like her mother though, or every man in the territory will be lookin' to court her." Mary blushed an even shade of deeper red as her husband continued to speak. "Well if this house is not big enough, then how about I build us new one? I ended up with one of the pieces of property that Guy Royal had seized. The Clemens family decided not to come back, and gave me the land as a way to thank us. I offered to sell it and split the money with the others, but they wouldn't let me. I think they had a plan in mind for us to use the land. It is a beautiful spot. It would not take too long to build a good homestead for us."
Mary was shocked. She had no idea that Chris owned any land, nor did she ever expect them to move out of the newspaper office. "You don't have to do that, Chris."
"I wanna. It is not far from town. The men could find me if they need me and you could keep the office here. We will turn the bedroom here into a nursery so that you can have the baby with you during the day." Chris really wanted this. He had never realized how much before. He had always known that he was a man more partial to being settled than roaming, but he did not think he would ever be building a home again.
"Well then I guess you had better start working. You have a real deadline that you are up against here." Mary beamed at him and patted her stomach. If anything, this baby had made Chris closer to her, not more distant. Mary suspected that she had Buck to thank for some of that though.
SIX MONTHS LATER
Mary sat impatiently in the office of the Clarion. At seven months pregnant, it was hard for her to be comfortable. Chris had told her that he would pick her up at 6 o'clock. She had made a point of going out to the homestead at least once a week to see the progress. It had been almost three weeks now though. The past two had found Mary too busy with things for the new baby. It was now almost quarter past and the pregnant woman was starving. She heard a wagon pull up outside and walked out onto the porch to find not her husband, but Ezra.
"Well hello, Ezra."
"Mr. Larabee asked me to escort you out to your new home this evening. I hope you do not mind." Ezra stepped down from the wagon and helped her up.
"Not at all."
+ + + + + + +
Less than a half hour later, Ezra pulled the wagon up to a well illuminated house. Mary was shocked by how much Chris had accomplished. The house was beautiful; everything she ever dreamed of, and more. Chris emerged from the front door and helped her down from the wagon. Ezra climbed down as well, got on his mount, tipped his hat to the couple and rode back to Four Corners.
"What is going on, Chris?"
"I just wanted to show you the progress." Chris led his wife up the steps. He thought that pregnancy definitely agreed with her. She had a glow about her, and even when she was cranky and uncomfortable, she still looked happy and contented. Chris opened the door and swept Mary up in his arms.
"Chris! Put me down! I am too heavy."
"Nonsense. You are still as light as a feather." Chris lifted her across the threshold and stood Mary on her feet again.
"Why did you do that?" This whole thing seemed so strange to her. Chris was definitely in an odd mood. At times lately, Mary had wondered which one of them really was pregnant.
"A man always carries his bride across the threshold of their new home."
"Chris, I have been in here before."
"Not like this." Chris stepped out of Mary's line of vision. She gasped. In the three weeks since she had been there, Chris had not only finished most of the house, but also filled it with furniture. "Do you like it?"
Mary looked around, stunned. "The furnishings are beautiful. Where did they come from?"
"Some stuff we made. The other things Ezra picked out of a catalog."
Mary smiled. Chris had done most of the work on their homestead himself, but he had not been afraid to ask the others for a little help so that everything would be done in time. Mostly the men just took Chris' watch so he could work, but sometimes they stopped by to help. Because of that help Chris had managed to finish the house well before schedule. "Would you like a tour?" Chris began to lead Mary from room to room. They started in Billy's room, downstairs.
The boy had been so excited when they had gone to tell him that he was going to have a baby brother or sister. He begged Mary to wait until he came home to have it. Chris suspected it would be close, but Mary thought she could wait.
Then they went into the living room. There was two arm chairs near the fire as well as a several other furnishings that encouraged relaxation and leisure. Chris proceeded to help Mary up the steps. There were five rooms upstairs. All, but one was empty of furniture. Those would be filled as they were needed for other babies that the Larabees might have. The further along Mary got in this pregnancy though, the less she wanted to fill those rooms. As she looked at her husband though, she knew it was all worth it. All the pain, the restless nights, and the expansion of the figure that she was so proud of would be worth the tiny Larabee baby that she would hold in her arms in a few months. She remembered what it was like when Billy was born and could not wait to share that happiness with Chris. The gunfighter swung open the door to the room closest to the middle. Inside there stood, in one corner, a tall armoire, and a mirror. In the other stood a wash stand with a rose colored bowl and pitcher set. In the center of the room there was a huge bed. It was hand carved with a beautiful flower pattern on the headboard.
"Chris, the bed...it is beautiful."
"I am glad you like it." Chris led Mary around the side of the bed. There, near the window there was a hand carved cradle and a bassinet.
"Oh Chris! When did you have time to do all of this?"
Chris smiled at his beautiful wife. Since Mary had begun to show so much, it had been hard for her to get comfortable in bed at night. Often times Chris would get up to allow her more room to sleep. That way, Mary got more rest and Chris got a lot of work done. "I find time for important things." Chris kissed his wife and led her back down the steps into the kitchen and then the dining room. There, on a lovely table was a lovely candlelight dinner for two.
"Chris?"
"I hope you are hungry."
Mary smiled sheepishly at Chris. She had eaten like five men for the last three months. Chris was always careful never to pick on her, but she knew that he was fascinated by the amount she could eat. He had told her that Sarah had eaten like a bird during her pregnancy. "You bet I am, but where did all this food come from?"
"I made it." Mary looked at Chris in astonished disbelief. "What? Can't a man make dinner for his wife? I did survive before I met you. I didn't live out of a restaurant."
Mary laughed and kissed her husband. "Thank you, my love." Chris pulled out the chair for her and then sat down beside his wife.
"This is probably one of our last chances to be alone, dear."
"But it will be wonderful to have a little baby in the house." Chris smiled at her and laughed. He tried to imagine what it would be like. He could hardly remember what it was like when Adam was born. Was that a bad thing? It was a long time ago.
"Chris? What are you thinking about?"
"How happy we are all going to be. Mary, I have something for you." Chris reached his hand out to his wife and grasped hers tightly within his own. He had been waiting for this moment for almost a week now. He had wanted it to be special.
+ + + + + + +
Chris stood in the general store patiently waiting for Mrs. Potter to fetch his package. When she brought the small brown package Chris thanked her and tore it open. There in a little velvet box was a silver, heart-shaped pendant on a chain. On one edge there was a tiny diamond. Around the right-hand edge of the heart there was a line of indentations to set stones in. The first four were filled with the most delicate of pearls. In the center the letters M.E.L. were engraved. Chris ran his callused thumb across the etching, smiling. Mary Elizabeth Larabee; he whispered the words to himself. He had never given Mary an engagement ring. The proposal had been so spontaneous that they had just never thought about it. Now he wanted to give his wife a symbol of his love.
Buck had been watching Chris from the corner of the store. He approached his best friend. "Damn. That woman has gone and turned Chris Larabee soft."
Chris turned and looked at his best friend. "Don't let it git around."
Buck laughed heartily and looked at the necklace. "It sure is pretty Chris."
"I hope Mary likes it."
"I'm sure she will." Chris smiled at his friend and then pocketed the box. He would keep it for the perfect moment.
+ + + + + + +
"Chris. You did not have to buy me anything. You built this beautiful house. I have you and Billy and the baby." She gently rubbed her stomach. "I do not need anything else."
"I never gave you an engagement ring. That was incredibly stupid of me. I want to give you something to show you how much I love you."
Mary patted her stomach again and whispered, "You already did."
Chris held out the box to her. "Open it."
Mary took the box from Chris' hand and slowly opened it. "Oh, my God. Chris, it is so beautiful." She slipped the necklace out of the box and gazed at it.
"The diamond is a symbol of my love. The four pearls are for our family. One for you, one for me, one for Billy, and baby makes four." Chris smiled and took the chain from her hand. He walked around behind her and fastened it around her neck. "There is extra places for more pearls should more babies come along." Chris kissed the back of her neck and then walked back around to the front of his wife.
Mary kissed him and nuzzled against his chest. "How about you take your wife home," she whispered into Chris' chest.
TWO MONTHS LATER
Chris was beginning to get nervous. Mary was sleeping a lot less. She could not ever get comfortable and she seemed to be as big as a house. Not that Chris did not still think she was the most beautiful woman on earth. He just wanted her to be able to sleep and be comfortable again. Billy was coming on the stage today with Judge Travis and his wife. Chris suspected that Mary was willing herself to wait until then. Just then, the coach pulled up and Chris opened the door.
"Daddy!" Chris loved the sound of that word. He reached up and lifted Billy off the stage. He then helped Evie Travis down. Behind her the Judge stepped out.
"Good to see you, Chris."
"You too, Judge."
"How is Mary holding up, Chris?"
"She is uncomfortable, but otherwise she is okay, Mrs. Travis."
"Daddy, can we go see Momma?"
"Sure Billy. Let's go."
The crowd walked across the street to the wagon. Chris helped Evie into the wagon and lifted Billy up alongside of her. Judge Travis climbed into the back and Chris seated himself in the front with Mrs. Travis and Billy.
Chris looked down at his adopted son and smiled. Not too long after they had found out that Mary was expecting, they had put into motion the process that made Chris Billy's legal father. Just last week Mary had received confirmation that Billy was officially a Travis-Larabee.
The gunfighter handed Billy the reigns. "How 'bout you drive us home." Billy beamed up at Chris. He loved it when his hero entrusted him with important tasks. Billy expertly took the reigns and led the wagon out of town to the Larabee homestead.
+ + + + + + +
When the wagon arrived at the homestead, Mary was sitting on the front porch. For the first time in a long while, she was somewhat comfortable.
"Momma!"
"Hello sweetheart." Billy ran up onto the porch and hugged Mary. "How have you been?"
"I missed you and Daddy, Momma. I am glad you waited to have the baby." Mary laughed. She had been so nervous that she would go into labor before he got home.
"Why don't you go help Chris with the horse and wagon, Billy?" Her son ran down the steps and into the barn to help his idol. Just then Mary heard a horse and turned to see Ezra riding fast and low toward the house. "Chris! Ezra is coming; fast."
Chris stepped out of the barn just as Ezra reached the house. "Chris! They need you in town. There is a bunch of drunkard hooligans shooting up the town and swearing that they have to see you!" Chris went back on the barn and threw his saddle on Storm. A few seconds later he came out of the barn in his duster and black hat. Mary gasped at the sight. It had been a long time since there had been a serious enough crime in Four Corners to return Chris Larabee to his old gunfighter ways. He slung himself up on his mount and glanced at his wife.
"I love you, Mary."
"Please be careful." Chris nodded to her and Ezra tipped his hat. Then, the two men were gone. Mary sat down heavily on a chair. Evie Travis put his hands on Mary's shoulders.
"Mary, he has been doing this for many years. He will be fine."
"But it has been a long while since he had anyone depending on him." Mary walked into the house and slowly climbed the steps to her bedroom. She did not want to face anyone right now. What if, God forbid, something were to happen? She did not think she could raise another child all alone. She laid on the bed and cried softly. As the darkness gathered, Mary could hear Evie preparing dinner. She knew that she should help, but until Chris was home she did not think that she could move.
+ + + + + + +
As Chris charged into town he was thinking about Mary. Once again he had left his family alone. What if something happened while he was gone? What if something happened to him? What if this was a set up to get him away from the homestead? Chris couldn't think like that. That is exactly what would get him killed. Chris shook all thoughts from his head except for those of the vicious gunslinger that he used to be. When he and Ezra arrived in town, the other men had the criminals rounded up.
"What happened?"
"Well, Chris, they said that they wanted to talk to you. We managed to trick them into being arrested though." Buck looked at his best friend. He could not believe what was before him. There stood Chris Larabee the gunfighter, not Chris Larabee the husband and father. Buck wondered what Mary thought about this.
"Why me?"
Vin emerged from the jail with Josiah close at his heels. The tracker looked upset. "Chris, they say that they know who hired Fowler."
Chris stormed toward the jail, Buck chasing after him. "Chris, wait!" Buck grabbed the man's arm. "Do you really want to do this? I know you want to catch the man who killed Sarah and Adam, but let us question them. You have a new life now. There's an angel at home waitin' for you. She is probably scared out her mind by know. Go home pard'. Take care of your wife and son. You are going to have another child soon and you do not need to deal with this. We will take care of them." Buck's eyes pleaded with Chris and finally the gunfighter turned on his heel and headed back to his mount.
"We'll git it out of 'em, Chris," Nathan called as Storm took off back to the homestead.
+ + + + + + +
As Chris road back to the homestead, he wondered what had come over him when Ezra rode in. Why had he put on the duster and hat and rode out like the "bad element" he used to be. Buck was right. Mary was probably hysterical by now. He hoped that Judge Travis and his wife had kept her calm. Chris began to mentally berate himself. Even though he had not had to take any chances, he realized that had he rode into Four Corners to find a shoot-out, he probably would have broken his promise to Mary. Then he realized something else. Chris Larabee may have become the gunslinger he once was, for an hour, but he was definitely a changed man. A group of outlaws claimed to know who had hired Fowler, and Chris had allowed the others to take care of it. Now, he was riding along not thinking about those men, but about Mary. Sarah and his past were still in the back of his mind, but Chris was focused on his future. It felt good to have both occupy his mind, and not fight each other. Chris smiled and kicked Storm. He wanted to be with his wife and son as soon as possible.
+ + + + + + +
Mary had just stopped crying and was drying her eyes when she heard the thundering of the hooves of a lone horse. She looked out the window and in the dimming light she could see all her husband's trademarks; the dark mount, the black hat, and the duster which swirled at his feet. She ran down the steps as fast as she could, despite her size. Before the Travises could say a word to her, Mary was outside. She threw herself into Chris' arms and he was more than glad to have her there. Not long after Mary came out of the house, Billy followed. He had been less worried about Chris' well-being, but he knew that his Momma had been upset. He looked at his parents and realized that he was not needed for the moment. He quietly returned to the house to tell his grandparents that Chris was okay.
"I am so glad you are home."
"I am sorry I rode out lookin' like the old hell-bent gunslinger I used to be."
"It's who you are."
"Not anymore. That gang in town claims to know who hired Fowler. I left the others to question them. I need to be here with you. I will always protect this town, but when they do not need me, I am going to be right here with you. You are who I am Mary."
Mary wiped tiny tears from her eyes. "Well then, let's eat. I know Evie has something wonderful cooking in the house."
+ + + + + + +
As it had turned out, the men in the jail were hired by an old enemy of Chris'. They did not know anything about Sarah and Adam's death. They had fed that line to the others to try to draw Chris out, so that they could kill him. It was another dead end. Somewhere deep in Chris' mind he suspected that he would never know who hired Fowler, but that was not his focus anymore. Chris Larabee had changed his priorities. For the first time in four years, he was putting his present and future ahead of his past.
+ + + + + + +
Chris and Billy were taking turns pacing in the Clarion office. Every time he heard Mary scream, the gunfighter tried to go into their old bedroom, but Buck would grab him and give him a look that roughly translated to "You would not be any help." Chris was glad that they had not had time to work on the nursery in the newspaper office.
"This was suppose to be a simple trip into town. Mary wanted to hang a sign saying that she would not be publishing the Clarion for about six weeks."
"She will be fine. Nathan is a good doctor." Vin didn't often speak, but when he did, his concise words had the power to soothe the savage beast. He, as well as Ezra and JD, were sitting in the parlor watching the pacing of the nervous father and son, and the constant silent bickering between best friends. Josiah was standing in the doorway saying a prayer. Judge Travis was on the front porch of the Clarion trying to control the crowds who had gathered to hear news of the Larabee baby. In theory this would be a smooth delivery. Second children were always easier, but that did not keep Chris calm.
"Mrs. Potter and Mrs. Travis are with her, Chris. It will be okay. Women have been having babies forever." JD hated to see the man he respected so much so distressed.
Chris really was trying to relax, but it was so hard. He hated to think that Mary was in pain, but he knew that this was the best kind of pain. Finally after about an hour, Evie Travis emerged from the room and walked up to Chris.
"Your wife and daughter would like to see you." A roar of cheers went up among the crowd. "You are now the big brother, Billy. Your Momma wants to see you, too." The men patted Chris on the back as the new father made his way to the old bedroom. Vin led Mrs. Travis out to the Judge, and Nathan shook Chris' hand as he escorted Mrs. Potter back to the store. Chris was too overwhelmed to say anything. Ushering Billy in front of him, he walked through the door, and shut it behind them. Laying in the center of their old bed he saw his wife. Mary looked exhausted, but also happier than he had ever seen her. Cradled in her arms was the tiniest of bundles. As Billy climbed up on one side of the bed, Chris sat down on the other. The gunfighter gazed down for the first vision of his baby girl. Looking back at him, Chris saw the most beautiful little face. She had a tiny tuft of golden blond hair, just like her mother's. What surprised Chris the most though was her eyes. The were the clearest, most beautiful green eyes he had ever seen.
"She is beautiful, Mary. Just like her mother."
"Yes, but she has her father's eyes. She will probably be a stubborn as you, too."
"If she is, she got that from her Momma."
Billy had been looking at his new sister for some time now. "What is her name?"
Chris and Mary laughed. They had not discussed baby names. They had thought that something would strike them when they saw their child. Actually Mary had thought of something as she had watched her husband take his first look at their little girl.
"Chris? What would you think if we called her Sarah?" Chris gazed at his wife. In some ways that might be too painful, but in other ways he knew it was perfect. He nodded at his wife and smiled. "Would you like to hold your daughter?" Chris looked frightened for a moment, but then it all came back to him, and he remembered exactly how to hold a baby.
"Billy, open the door please." Chris stepped out into the parlor to a collection of people waiting to see the little bundle of joy. Billy helped Mary from the bed and she came to stand by her husband. Chris held the baby close to his chest, but so that all those who had gathered could see. "Ladies and gentlemen, I would like you to meet my daughter," he looked to his wife and smiled, "our daughter, Sarah Elizabeth Larabee." Mary smiled as the six men, who had become like brothers to her and Chris, as they each took there turn to hold the baby. Then Judge Travis and Evie held her. Mrs. Potter had left, but Mary knew she would thank the widow for her help later. Finally, Chris carefully showed Billy how to hold his sister. It warmed Mary's heart to see father, son, and now daughter all together. As the men slowly filtered out of the office, Billy handed Sarah back to Mary.
"Come on Billy. Let's go over to the hotel and get your Momma and Daddy some lunch." Buck led the boy out of the Clarion and left the new parents in peace.
"Thank you." Mary was smiling at Sarah and at her husband.
"I didn't do anything."
"You gave me this most precious gift." Chris smiled at his wife.
"You gave her to me." Chris tenderly kissed the top of the tiny head and then kissed Mary. "I love you and I love her." The couple became lost in the euphoria of their new life. Unbeknownst to them they were being watched.
Judge Travis looked on quietly as his daughter-in-law and the man who had become like a son to him basked in the birth of their first child. He laughed to himself. Orrin Travis was a pretty good matchmaker. From the first time he had seen Mary and Chris together he knew they were destined to be married. These men could have left town at anytime, the government had been willing to place a sheriff in Four Corners ever since Marshal Bryce had been shot in town. Judge Travis had worked hard to convince those railroad barons that the Seven were better for Four Corners. He had feared that if the men were not needed, that they would leave, especially Chris. They had made it though, and now Chris and Mary Larabee were connected forever. Orrin Travis smiled and walked out of the Clarion. Life was good. Everyone had overcome their past and made it to the future.
The End
