The Last Word
The stage had barely halted in the street, the dust still swirling about the wheels, when all hell broke loose. Larabee heard a whoop behind him and turned in time to see a cowboy with a bandana covering his face, gun drawn and pointing skyward, whooped again and began firing short quick volleys of bullets into the air. The gunslinger began trotting up the boardwalk, frowning, his own gun drawn, when a second cowboy, coming from behind the coach, loped up the street, firing randomly. Chris would have shot either of the men, but they weren't shooting at people, they were simply raising hell. Then the second cowboy turned up towards the roof of the Clarion, shot, and a body tumbled down, was roped by the first, and dragged up the street. And yet . . .
Goddamnitalltohell! Larabee thought quickly, the man on the horse up the street was Vin Tanner, galloping away, dragging the "body" behind him! About that time, the second "outlaw," Buck Wilmingtion, bolted after him. When the head of the "body" popped off, two women fainted straight away. Buck swung off the borrowed horse he rode, scooping up the "head," tossing it to Tanner and remounting. Together they wheeled their horses and disappeared into the dust.
Those disembarking the stage gasped, screamed, stared. One refused to get off at all, and was arguing with the driver from his seat inside the coach about continuing on immediately. Chris looked after the settling dustcloud as the anger began rising in him. Ezra was standing at the door to the coach, making extravagant excuses for the scene the passengers had witnessed. Nathan was tending one of the downed women, waving smelling salts under her nose and reassuring onlookers she would be fine. JD stood, wide eyed, on the roof of the Clarion, wishing like anything he was on one of the horses that had just disappeared, and wondering how it was he hadn't realized during the planning of this elaborate hoax he'd be left to face Larabee while the other two rode out of town. Josiah stood between Chris and the stage, biting his lip, hard, trying to remain a stern and as commanding a presence as he could, considering the scene he had just witnessed. Finally, he simply turned his back and walked away. Better that than to burst out laughing as Mary, clearly furious, made her way across the street towards Chris.
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A quarter mile out of town, laughing hard, both men reined in, pulled the coverings off their faces and slapped each other on the back, tossing backward glances towards the town they had just left.
"You think JD'll have the good sense to git'ta hell outta there afore Larabee cold cocks him?"
"I think that boy is gonna be busy huntin' us down, Vin, and wondering how we're gonna get him outta this mess?"
Vin nodded, took his bandana off and tossed the straw stuffed head to the ground. "I'll head back and find Larabee. I reckon Mary'll have a thing or two to say to him first."
That comment drew another round of shared laughter. Buck pulled off the sugarloaf sombrero that disguised him and smacked it against his leg. "Pard, that was downright FUN!"
Vin nodded again. "It was worth it. Chris and Mary are gonna remember this for a while! Ezra is gonna be mad we run his business outta town, too."
"We just give'em what they wanted, though. Coupla outlaws out here in the wild west! Did you see them folks when this fella's head fell off?"
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Vin ambled cautiously into town from a different direction than his hurried exit, dismounted and led his borrowed horse into the livery. Yosemite grabbed the reins when he saw him, dragging the horse further into the barn.
"Larabee is PISSED, Vin! He's ready to shoot you two!"
"That's okay, Yosemite, he's been ready for a long time." Vin grinned easily.
Yosemite shook his head. Vin just didn't have the good sense to be afraid of Chris Larabee! He could see in the near future that the seven would probably end up being six, five or maybe even four, if Chris held that youngster JD responsible for the antics of these two.
"Vin, he is really mad. Miz Travis had him near pinned aginst the wall there rantin' about what he's gonna do about you!"
Vin continued to grin. "It's good for him to get worked up onced or twice. It'll be okay, I'll tell him it was all Buck's idea. He's mad at Buck most'a the time, anyway." He waved away Yosemite's worry and strode out into the street, looking up and down. Might as well find Larabee, buy him a drink and make him see the humor in all this. Preferably before Larabee shot someone.
+ + + + + + +
Vin pushed open the saloon doors slowly, uncharacteristically taking a small step to his right as he did. Couldn't hurt to be careful. As his eyes adjusted to the darkened room, he focused on the table in the corner, and nodded slowly, smiling cautiously. Damn, he still looked pretty pissed. Matter'afact, Larabee settled Tanner with a scowl and a threatening glare Vin couldn't remember being victim to before. He strode purposely towards the bar, getting a similar scowl from Ezra and a nastier one from Inez, collected a bottle of good whiskey, a pair of glasses and turned back towards the corner. Cast a quick look around for JD. Where the hell was that kid hiding, anyway?
"Buck's idea." He commented dryly as he dropped into his chair, hooking it with a boot as Chris kicked it out and away from the table. A challenge not to sit down with a dangerous man. Hell, I seen more dangerous men'n you, Larabee, Vin thought.
Chris continued to sit in silence.
Vin reclined, hanging a leg across the arm of the chair.
"Seen JD?" Vin finally asked.
No answer.
"Hey, Ezra, you seen JD?" Vin repeated, loudly, drawing more attention to the table in the corner, the table where a man goes when he wants to be left fuckingdamnwellenough alone.
"No, Mr Tanner, I have not. Not that I spend my time or energy looking for miscreants." Ezra dealt a few more cards, and in a most condescending way, added, "Miscreant. Villian, scoundrel, knave . . . criminal, even." He drew out the words in a sneer.
Vin smiled. Wasn't the worst he'd been called, not by a longshot. He sighed, poured another shot and pushed it across the table towards Chris, who ignored him.
"Well, hell, iffen y'all are gonna stay mad . . . ." He took a swig directly off the bottle, slammed it down on the table, and rose. "Hasta la vista, pard."
There was no response as he left the saloon.
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Vin met up with Buck outside, where Buck had already heard he was being blamed for the 'bit'afun' as Tanner described it.
"You seen JD?"
"Yep, he's a little pissed off, too. Seems he thinks we oughtta warned him we was leavin' him high and dry with Chris when we done took off." The two men couldn't help sharing a grin over that as they went their separate ways. JD, with his quick mind and quicker agility, could be just a tad naïve when it came to dealing out trouble with his older friends. He was also young and inexperienced enough he might even believe Larabee'd be just mad enough to shoot him.
Vin knew Chris would cool off, hell, didn't really seem Chris was all that mad at him, just mostly mad that Mary'd trapped him, yelled at him, and he hadn't had the balls to tell her off. That didn't surprise Vin any. Mary'd gotten to Chris with her grit, and he was less inclined to try to bully her than when they'd first met. Not because he agreed with her, or was in any way afraid of her, but there were too few women with that kind of pluck out here and nobody needed to destroy it.
He avoided Ezra. Which wasn't anything new, only now it was Vin avoiding Ezra instead of the other way around. He avoided Nathan. Nathan hadn't seemed too howdy-friendly after tending the two women that passed out cold during the little show in the street. He finally found JD, but he might as well have avoided him, too, since JD seemed pretty damned pissed off at both Vin and Buck. Wisely, Vin decided maybe the folks at the reservation would be just a little more happy to see him than the folks in town were.
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When Vin rode into town two days later, he immediately sensed danger. It seemed as though the dust muffled every sound, the creaking of his saddle screamed through the streets, the town otherwise shrouded in silence. People on the boardwalk turned and stared as he drew in and down, striking a hardness that he hadn't felt in a while.
Mary was standing on the walk in front of the Clarion, her hands covering her mouth, just watching him. She finally stepped out towards his gelding as he jogged past, and he slowed and then stopped his mount, watching her. She kept her head tilted down, until she came close, then turned upward slightly, and he was struck by her red rimmed eyes when she lifted hers to his. He immediately looked away, eyes rippling across the street, taking in the people there. Josiah stood next to JD on the church steps, his hands on the younger man's shoulders, Nathan behind them, turning away from Vin's eyes and going inside. Buck's face stark and sad, startling Vin with the raw emotion there. Ezra standing at the saloon window, watching him, a blank look on the gambler's face, emerald eyes flat and hard.
Nathan.
Buck.
JD.
Josiah.
Ezra.
He looked back towards the church. Josiah wasn't turning away, so he rode towards him. When he reined in right at the base of the steps, JD hurried away, and Josiah stepped up to him.
"Vin."
Vin nodded but his eyes shifted constantly around him, taking in the silence. He remained horsed. He would have reined Peso away, long trotted him to the edge of town and then lay heels to him, but right then he was having trouble breathing, a terrible crushing weight preventing his chest from rising and filling his lungs with air.
"Vin. Get down."
He refused to move, unable, really, to move, still fighting to get air, still trying to work up the strength to cut and run. Josiah grabbed the bridle reins and held fast.
"Get down, son."
Vin swung one leg over, listening to the command and responding, still a part of him was leaning over the horse, galloping hell for leather, kicking up dust and bullets and Hades behind him in his mind.
He dropped his reins the same time Josiah let go the bridle, and followed the bigger man up the steps. He tripped, TRIPPED over the damn door frame; when Josiah caught his elbow like he was a cripple, he furiously ripped it away.
"I can walk goddammit!"
He followed the unspoken command to go into the church, to look what lay there. A coffin, simple pine box, stood on sawhorses near the pulpit. Nathan, back to him, sitting near the front in one of the pews. He stopped a few feet inside the church and stared.
He sensed the other regulators gathering, could see or perhaps feel their presence just outside the church, Buck actually coming inside the door right behind him, shaking his head, angry at Josiah, a mouthed 'no' on his lips. Vin stood until he caught his breath, turned away and walked past Buck into the sunlight outside. Stood, looking at the sad faces around him that refused to meet his eyes. Finally, he spoke,
"Boys, some mudholes are deeper'n others, and you're in a deep one today."
"SONOFABITCH!"
Vin heard the box burst open behind him as he broke into a wide grin, shaking his head. Larabee climbed out of the coffin, and advanced on Tanner, who turned to face him with a broad smile on his face, laughing.
"How'd you know?"
"You don't gotta be standin' in a cowpie to smell the shit. You didn't nail the top down."
"Maybe they thought you'd like to pay your respects on me!"
"Like hell I would. Pull your head out, Larabee, you die and I got a lot less grief in my life! Gotta admit, you got'em all in on it, didn't ya?"
The raucous ribbing and laughter floated up and down the street, breaking the silence as the rest of the town breathed in relief. The men gathered about and turned as one, Mary laughing as she asked, 'Where are you going?"
Together, again, they answered, "Saloon."
Several hours later, after threats of retribution and promises of payback, slaps on the back and traded barbs, Vin rose to call it a night. When he walked out into the darkness, Larabee followed. They stood for a moment, side by side, taking in the town around them, before Vin stepped off the boardwalk, strode a half dozen steps away, and turned back.
"Hey, Larabee?"
"Yeah?"
"You had me, you know, just a minute there, you had me. Don't ever pull that shit again."
Chris was silent, watching him, nodding without smiling. "Watch your back, pard."
The End