Author's Note: I finally decided to post these stories because I found out that 5/23 was apparently mpreg day. I hope you consider that warning enough before you venture forth.
Warning: The same as applied to the previous installment, and, yeah. Mpreg day.
| Chapter 1 | Chapter 2 | Chapter 3 |
"Vin, you're a man."Vin looked at Nathan irritably. "I know, Nathan. You're not helping."
They stared at each other for a moment, Nathan incredulous, Vin scowling. "But, Vin. You’re a man... Unless you've been hiding something from us all this time?"
"What?" Vin looked taken aback. "I'm not even sure what that's supposed to mean! What, like... I've got girly bits I haven't shared with you? You said it already, Nathan, I'm a MAN! A MAN. I haven't got anything other than man parts!" Though Nathan had wanted to laugh at Vin's mention of "girly bits," his patient was starting to get hysterical, and he figured it was his duty as a healer to try keep from upsetting his friend in his very strange and delicate condition.
"Hey, Vin, it's OK. I wasn't trying to imply that you're any less of a man. Though your current circumstance sort of puts a whole new perspective on things."
For a moment, he thought Vin might hit him or, more alarmingly, cry, but he simply deflated. "I don't know, Nathan. I mean, you really can't get pregnant without girl parts, can you? I swear I never had them before. Can... have you ever heard of a body changing like that?"
Nathan blinked. "What are you thinking, your body's going to grow a vagina? Look, I may not be a doctor, but even I know that can't happen."
"Then how did this happen?" Vin asked, gesturing to his middle.
Nathan stood, put his hands on his hips, and dropped them again. Solemnly, he contemplated his patient and said, "That's a good question, Vin."
Vin squeezed his eyes shut, and Nathan took a cautious step back.
"I’m just gonna… look at some books back here. Maybe there’s… some sort of… explanation.” Vin’s eyes snapped open to shoot him a disbelieving look and Nathan added awkwardly, “I’ve got lots of books.”
“Great,” Vin ground out, clutching the edge of the bed so hard Nathan thought his fingers might break.
Nathan sighed quietly and began rifling through his collection of texts. Really, he had perhaps upwards of ten volumes, all old, and he was already convinced that none of them could explain Vin’s situation, but at least it got him out of striking distance. Vin, in his current condition, bewildered Nathan, and frankly gave him the willies a little. He was still musing on the subject and pretending to read a worn anatomy text when the clinic door swung open. Buck Wilmington strode in, grinning and boisterous.
"Nathan!" Buck boomed genially, striding toward him. "Mary Travis wanted me to deliver this to you." He held out a bundle of papers, which Nathan took with a nod and absent thanks.
"Heya, Vin! What are you doing here? Got the sniffles?" Nathan turned around, about to dismiss Buck as quickly as possible, but then he saw that Vin was blushing. Vin was pregnant and blushing. Discreetly, Nathan stepped on his own foot to see if it would wake him up. Noting that he wasn't having a dream, he realized that Buck's question still needed an answer.
"Vin's... ahhhhhh..." Nathan floundered.
Buck glanced at Vin's hand, which was resting protectively on a slight bulge in his abdomen, and laughed. He reached forward to pat it and said, "Been gaining some weight there, Vin? Heck, you don't need Nathan to tell you how to fix that: just stop eating so much!"
The expression of outrage on Vin's face was priceless. Even if Nathan hadn't been trying to hold back laughter and was actually incapable of speech, he wouldn't have been able to explain to Buck what was going on.
“I’m not fat, you bastard!” Vin practically shrieked. “I’m pregnant!”
The total silence that fell after this declaration somehow increased Nathan’s lightheadedness. The situation was painfully ridiculous, and it just kept getting worse. Nathan wondered what Josiah would say about this reflecting on God's sense of humor and couldn't keep back a tiny snort of laughter.
He was so distracted by the effort of trying not to burst into hysterical guffaws that it took him a moment to notice the significant look Vin and Buck were sharing. Vin was blushing again, but his expression was defiant and almost… frightened? Buck, on the other hand, was pole axed. His expression wasn’t completely disbelieving, though, and Nathan thought he’d seen that trapped, guilty look on his face before. With Lucy.
Oh, damn.
Buck’s mouth flapped uselessly for a moment before he gathered enough of his wits to ask for clarification. “WHAT?” he bellowed. Vin glared at him impotently, and Nathan had a moment to be glad the anger was aimed at someone else for once before Buck turned to him.
"I didn't even think men could get pregnant! Nathan!" He looked at Nathan as though he were accountable, either for never letting him know that men could conceive or simply by the unfair logic that someone other than Buck must be to blame, and Nathan was the closest target.
"Hey! This isn't my fault! I’m not the one who slept with Vin!" Nathan countered.
"And the Powder Man!" Vin cried for no particular reason. Nathan stared. This really wasn't his business, but, what?
Buck ran hands through his hair in frustration and stomped around a couple of paces. "This is why I started having sex with men in the first place, after that Lucy scare. Here I thought it would be safe, but ohhh no. I guess I didn't have to turn all funny for men after all."
Vin blanched. "You mean... you didn't want to have sex with me?" Nathan, momentarily forgotten, didn't know whether to make a break for the door or stay and watch. On the one hand, this was his friends' personal affair, and clearly none of his business in any sense besides the fact that Vin was his patient. On the other hand, he couldn't quite pull himself away. It was fascinating and repellant in equal parts, much like the first time he watched an autopsy.
Buck looked horrified, having never expected that Vin would start acting like a woman both physically and emotionally. This was clearly turning out to be way too much for him. "Aww, now, Vin, it's not like that. You know, you're attractive... you've got that pretty hair and everything," he said, with a vague motion toward his own head.
"What? My hair isn't pretty! I am not a girl! Why do you think I always have this stubble? It's because I'm a man and I want to look like it!"
"I thought that was just because you couldn't grow any more! I mean, do you ever really have any more or less facial hair than you do now?"
Vin flushed. "This is not the point! AHHH! I should have known you wouldn’t face up to it, Buck. It’s fine! I’m fine. I’ll have this baby on my own. I don’t need you!” The last sentence broke off with what sounded suspiciously like a bitten-off sob. Nathan wrinkled his nose in disgust.
Buck, however, softened. "Awww, Vin. Somehow... we're gonna have a baby!" He put a big, awkward hand on the still-small protrusion of Vin's belly and smiled down at the mother... or father... of his... or possibly the Powder Man's... baby. Vin looked down at the hand, then back up at Buck, and offered a tiny smile.
Still not wanting to draw attention to himself, Nathan quietly threw up into an unused hand basin in the corner.
| Chapter 1 | Chapter 2 | Chapter 3 |
Feedback - Finnigan Geist, May 2006