Twelve Magnificent Days of Christmas

by KT

Various Universes

Disclaimer: Not mine, never were, never will be.

Feedback: Most appreciated.

Note: These drabbles were written in response to LaraDee's Christmas challenge. One ficlet for each line of the famous song.

Eleven pipers wasn't easy, I had to use a very obscure AU - sorry :0) The only other story is A New Monarch of the Glenn at Blackraptor

There are various versions of the song. This is the one I used. However for the purposes of M7 artistic licence days 10 and 12 have been reversed.

On the Twelfth Day of Christmas my true love gave to me
Twelve drummers drumming.
Eleven pipers piping
Ten lords a leaping
Nine ladies dancing
Eight maids a milking
Seven swans a swimming
Six geese a laying
Five gold rings
Four calling birds
Three French hens
Two turtle doves and a
A partridge in a pear tree

On the 1st Day of Christmas
Meeting by the Bird

Civil War AU

Vin pushed his gun into his shoulder, he had it in his sights, the kill was seconds away. Just as he was about to pull the trigger he felt the cold press of a gun barrel against his neck.

"Who you aiming at boy?"

"No one."

"Oh really."

"Just a bird."

"What bird?"

"Yonder, a partridge in a pear tree."


"Yup, but it's not fer me, captain wants is fer his lady."

"Officers, all the same. On your way reb."

Vin looked around at the Yankee behind him, with his unruly black hair and deep blue eyes, and smiled.

On the 2nd Day of Christmas
Bill and Coo

Old West

JD gasped, as the lobe of his ear was a nibbled, delicate finger ghosted along his collarbone under his shirt. The noise around the camp fire rose, so he pulled his gaze away from his beloved Casey's eyes to see Ezra win yet another hand. Then insistent hands turned his head back from the fire and eager lips captured his.

Chris got up in search of coffee. "For heavens sakes can't you two leave each other alone?"

"Come on now Chris, it's down right romantic," Buck chided with a grin.

"Like two turtle doves, billing and cooing," Josiah observed contentedly.

On the 3rd Day of Christmas
New Stock

Little Britches "Vengeance" AU

JD rode on Buck's hip, eyes wide as saucers as he took in the sights and sounds of the Christmas market.

"What are we gonna buy?" he asked the tavern keeper.

"Well Rascal we need all kinds of things for Christmas, and Chris needs more stock."

JD frowned at him.

"He needs some new layers, fresh hens," he explained.

JD smiled and instantly looked around from his elevated vantage point.

"Lookit Buck!" he squeaked and pointed at a stack of crates with poultry in them. "Three French hens."

Buck frowned and followed his gaze. "Fresh hens JD, fresh - not French."

On the 4th Day of Christmas
Fleeting Paradise


"Well Corporal Sanchez we have a hold up, it'll be a few hours before the evac chopper can't pick us up."

"How many Sir?"


"How many hours 'till they come?"

"Oh, err at least four."

Calling birds in the canopy above them filled the air with beautifully delicate song, for once the breeze was light and refreshing, and the heat pleasant not stifling. As he sat back against a tree and closed is eyes young Josiah could almost pretend he was spending Christmas in paradise - not stuck in a miserable steaming jungle, fighting a war he didn't understand.

On the 5th Day of Christmas
Sure is Pretty

Little Britches "Star Trek" AU

Suddenly the view screen was filled with the plant's image.

"Oh wow!" came a familiar voice from the turbo lift doors.

Chris turned, as the boys he and Buck had adopted, came on to the bridge with Josiah.

"And why are you two here?"

Vin just grinned as he held Josiah's hand. JD was already heading for Buck.

"Seems someone's been filling their heads with tales of golden planets," Sanchez explained.

Chris glared at Buck, who, in response, pointed at Ezra.

"One, two, three, four, five! It's got five gold rings," JD announced.

"Sure is pretty," Vin whispered in awe.

On the 6th Day of Christmas

Old West

"Nettie Wells what are you so happy about?" Chris asked as he arrived.

"I got me six geese laying nice big eggs. And come Christmas I'm gonna sell them and make a tidy little sum."

"Nettie?" Buck asked as he got down.


"Did you let the boys alone with the geese?"


"Chris! Miz Nettie's got gooses come and see!" Vin called.

"We gaved them names, Dolly, Sadie, Gertie …come on." JD took Buck's hand and tugged.

As he went Larabee looked back at the old lady and shook his head. "Come Christmas you're on you own," he warned.

On the 7th Day of Christmas
More is Lots

ATF Little Britches

JD and Vin were having fun, feeding ducks in the park while their Uncle Ezra read the paper.

"Look Vin," JD pointed across the lake and began to count. "Seven swanses swimming."

"You can't say 'swanses', it's just swans."

"Yeah ya can," JD protested. "One swan, two swans, lots of swanses."

"Nope, if there's more than one of them, you add an 's' and say 'swans'. Ain't no special word for lots of swans. Seven swans swimming is what you say. We did it in school, so I know."

JD frowned; his way made more sense. "I'm gonna ask Buck."

On the 8th Day of Christmas
Show Ground Attractions


"It would seem, brother, that our team mates have found something of more interest at the county show, than the infringement of the gun laws."

Sanchez directed Nathan’s to were, below a sign reading, ‘Goat Milking Competition’, five back sides, three clad in faded, figure hugging blue denim, one in very tight black denim and one in expensive, brand new designer denim, were leaning low over a fence.

"What’s so interesting?" Jackson asked as he came up behind the men.

"Eight," JD whispered.

"Maids," Ezra confirmed

"Ah," Buck sighed.

"Milking," Vin explained.

"I’m in charge of them," was Chris’ excuse.

On the 9th Day of Christmas
Barn Dancing

Old West

"Buck," JD called, but he didn’t respond. "Oh Buuuuck," he tried a bit louder, still no response, other than a gentle sore.

"What’s up with him?" Chris asked.

"He’s asleep, but he can’t sleep here, not in Mr Deeds hay loft - can he?"

Chris shrugged. "He’s slept in worse. Is he drunk?"

"More like exhausted if you ask me." Chris looked at Jackson for more of an explanation. "Nine ladies - dancing, I counted, he danced with nine ladies, at least three times each, some more than that. It’s a wonder he had the strength to get up into the loft!"

On the 10th Day of Christmas
Parade Watching


"Can you check in guys, let me know what you see," JD called over the radio.

"Can't see a damn thing in this crowd. How the hell do we track a guy with this parade on, I don't know," Chris growled.

"Brother all I see is cows, don't ask me why."

"I got a bunch of old men," Nathan called.

"Buck?" JD called. "Buck! BUCK!"


"What do you see?"


"Oh no."

"Not fair Bucklin, all I got's majorettes!"


"Little ones."



"I'm deaf, I've gone deaf, drummers, right in front of me, ten drummers drumming."

On the 11th Day of Christmas
Gathering of the Clan

Monarch of the Glenn AU

"Tell me again," JD pleaded. "…slowly."

Buck grinned and began to explain it one more time. "On Christmas Eve, the Ross Clan lairds…"

"That would be me?"

"It would. Gather; each one brings a main course and carries it in, accompanied by his personal piper…"



"How many?"

"How many what?"


"Eleven, eleven courses, eleven pipers piping. Then there's starters, fish course, desserts and cheese."

"And what am food am I taking?"

"Roast wild boar."

"Shit! I'm gonna explode!"

"Nah w…" Buck almost said 'we' but stopped himself. "Ross' are made of strong stuff. Just have small portions.

On the 12th Day of Christmas
A Wagon Full

Old West

A big wagon rumbled into town with Buck driving.

"Hi Chris! Meet the Lord family, back there is…" he began to count on his fingers. "… Kerry, Jeanne, Chris, Meredith, Nancy, Phyllis, Jan, Kim, Cin, Nin and Trisha, and this here is their mom Lara." He patted the knee of the stunning women beside him.

"So that’s twelve Lords?"

Leaping down from the wagon, Buck smiled at his oldest friend. "Sure is pal, and all as pretty as a picture."

Chris shook his head, only Buck could go out with a prisoner and come back with a dozen beautiful women!

The End