This is a prequel to Cobalt's marvelous "Sadist's Grin" A/U.
WARNING! A number of things in this fic make reference to another prequel fic that isn't quite done. Besra is the unnamed previous owner of Ezra and Vin's condeeds. Suffice it to say, he puts them to work in the same manner that Led does in Cobalt's fic. Consider any other unexplained bits as teasers for the other prequel.
As for this prequel, what could possibly be worse for Vin than being a con-whore? Hhhhhm? Read on and find out.
Thanks to Cobalt for encouraging me and throwing this wonderful universe open.
PS: Please send feedback
Besra was in a good mood. The last auction had been an overwhelming success. All of his rare cons had been returned in reasonably good condition, although the human had been bruised a bit. But, when he'd answered the duty summons after his normal 72 hour rest period, the bruises didn't stand out too badly. A little makeup and they were barely noticeable. And, his green eyes did tend to make buyers overlook minor defects. If any clients pointed them out, looking for a discount, Besra would point out that all the ways his rare con could please a client. He'd never yet taken less than full price on the human.
Besra happily surveyed his domain. His rare cons were all with clients except for the two Aurilliums. He sighed, if only they weren't so fragile. He could easily sell all of their time. But, he refused their services to any client who couldn't provide a fresh medical clearance. He'd had the great fortune to own the rights to an Aurillium once before. But he'd accepted the word of a long-time client without demanding to see the medical clearance himself and allowed him to purchase the Aurillium's time. And, Besra had bitterly regretted it when the Aurillium had died a week later from a virus his client had given the fragile alien.
So, his two gems sat waiting patiently for medically approved clients. Besra grinned, maybe not so patiently. They were fondling each other. He shook his head. Natural born whores, every one of them.
His attention turned to the common cons. He was delighted to see that every cubicle was occupied and there were even a couple of cons in the booths. The common bar was crowded with patrons laughing and drinking, while they eyed up the commons. Besra chuckled thinking how his rivals had called him crazy for closing after the auction. Besra's pleasure house was never busier than after he'd been closed.
His cons were all medically certified and treated for any bugs they'd picked up during their down time. And allowing them the luxury seemed to agree with them. His cons rarely had to be sent to the camps to be reminded that there were worse ways for cons to spend their sentences. He laughed at the short sightedness of his competitors. Three days profit was a small price to pay to keep his house running so smoothly.
Besra had just come into the common area when a the lobby door burst open. A ragtag bunch Besra instantly pegged as star raiders swaggered into the place. Star raiders were marauders, attacking poorly defended outposts on distant planets, but they were smart and careful to keep their raiding outside of the Federated space. His eyes narrowed in speculation. Four of them, dirty clothing, unkempt hair and beards, and unless he was misreading the bulges in their pockets, fresh off a raid. Not likely to be looking for trouble, only for a good time. Much profit. He grinned broadly. "Gentlemen, welcome to Besra's Pleasure House. I am Besra."
Eli Joe informed Besra that they wanted food, a couple of beds and a whore. He looked around the room. They'd just come back from a raid where they'd lost two men and been forced to split up. His most trusted partner of a thoroughly untrustworthy lot, Yates a big Hartoo, and two others, Balaka, a Haricort and Johnny, a bad-tempered human, had come with him in one of the two small but extremely fast and heavily armed space vehicles. The other four had taken a different route. Eli Joe and his group had to hole up for the night while their ship's engine was repaired. The job would be finished tomorrow and they'd be heading out to meet the others. For tonight, they'd eat a decent meal, have a decent bed to sleep in and a whore to share.
Besra snapped his fingers and the common cons who weren't with tricks hastened over. The cons immediately began rubbing against the raiders and whispering filthy promises in their ears. Besra was pointing out the different assets and abilities of each one and trying to talk Eli Joe into taking at least two of them. Eli didn't see the point to the extra expense. One con could service all of them repeatedly during the night. Their dicks would give out before the con's ass or mouth would. He'd decided on a Bajoan and was negotiating the terms, when Yates tapped his arm.
He waved the other man off. "I'm doing business," he said, not bothering to look up.
"Eli, there's some you ain't seen yet," Yates interrupted again.
"He'll do," Eli Joe said harshly. Yates was starting to piss him off.
"He ain't gonna do near as well as what's over there," Yates insisted and waggled his arm under Eli's nose, pointing in the direction of the cubicles.
"What the fuck's the matt-?" Eli's words died on his lips as he got a look at who Yates was pointing at. "Vin Tanner." Eli whispered the name. He'd thought Tanner long dead by now. A slow smile crossed his face and he savored the thought. Vin Tanner, ex-bounty hunter, ex-sharpshooter, ex-partner, a con, a common whore. "I want him," Eli said.
Besra was never one to miss an opportunity for greater profit. "He's much more expensive."
"Double," Eli Joe said in a tone that Besra wisely decided not to challenge.
"We have a deal. Do you want him now or after your meal?" Besra asked.
"Send the food up to the room," Eli Joe said. "Send up a couple of bottles of decent whiskey too. Wait an hour and send him up."
"With great pleasure sir," Besra said.
Vin noticed Besra talking with a group of raiders, without any real interest. He could see that two were human, one was Hartoo and one was Haricort. He couldn't see their faces and he didn't really care. If he was fucking any of them, he'd know soon enough. Right now, he needed to take a piss and then get back to work. Vin turned his back on the group without another thought.
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The raiders finished their meal and put the remnants on a table outside the door of the room they were all waiting in. Johnny and Balaka were stretched out on the double bed getting hornier by the minute as they passed the time waiting for Tanner to show up, bragging about their prowess. Yates and Eli Joe were sharing a drink and savoring the thought of the con's reaction when he found out who he was whoring for.
Eli Joe hated Vin Tanner as much as he hated any man in the galaxy. Once upon a time Tanner had been in his gang. Eli Joe had appreciated his good looks and his space smarts and his deadly proficiency with any kind of projectile weapons. He'd offered to make Tanner his partner- in every way- and Tanner had turned him down flat, with a few choice words about his heritage thrown in for good measure. Eli Joe had smiled coldly and seemed to accept Vin's answer.
However, no one turned Eli Joe down- ever and got away with it. Eli Joe had bided his time and when the opportunity, in the guise of Jess Kinkaid had presented itself. Kinkaid was one of the first settlers on a planet that had only recently been rendered fit for human habitation. Tanner had disagreed with the gang's plan to raid the new colony, and parted company with them. When they'd killed Kinkaid, it had been a simple matter for Eli Joe to plant a glove that belonged to Vin at the man's ranch.
Yates had been a Federation Agent then, working both sides of the law. Eli Joe paid him handsomely to keep the law off the gang's back. He'd given Yates the news of Kinkaid's death and told him where to find Vin. Eli Joe got his revenge- and the spoils from the raid. Yates got a reward for capturing a dangerous murderer and Vin got a life sentence. And now, Vin Tanner was going to give Eli Joe what he'd wanted from the minute he'd laid eyes on the Texan. Eli Joe chuckled at the thought and raised his glass and saluted Yates with it.
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Vin held onto the back of the booth he was kneeling in to keep from tumbling over the back as the Hartoo fucked him viciously. He was glad all the cubicles were occupied or he figured the brutish Hartoo would be punctuating the thrusts in his ass, with punches from his fists - or worse. As it was, the Hartoo had to settle for trying to fuck him through the back of the booth. Vin checked the time 2:45 in the morning. Only fifteen more minutes before the house closed. If he was lucky the Hartoo would be his last trick of the night. Vin fervently hoped so. Even with healing solution his ass would be sore at least until morning. Not that anyone gave a shit. Vin wouldn't be off duty until exactly 3:00, no matter how sore his ass was.
The Hartoo howled loudly and held onto Vin's hips with bruising force and thrust fiercely into Vin's body. He dropped his head and Vin yelped in pain when the Hartoo bit his shoulder as he came. The Hartoo collapsed heavily onto Vin, uncaring of the uncomfortable position the con was in. He lay panting for several minutes and then pulled out of Vin's body quickly and pulled his pants up from around his ankles. He tucked himself in and without so much as a glance at the con turned and left the house.
Vin knew he should get up. Besra would be pissed if he spotted Vin in the booth without a trick. But, his ass was raw and his shoulder was throbbing and he just needed a few minutes to get himself together before he moved. He was very glad it was time for the house to close. The Hartoo had been a rough trick and he just wanted to get a shower and crawl into bed and wait for Ezra to slip in with him. God, he just wanted to sleep in Ezra's arms tonight.
"Get up. Get up."
Besra's voice. Vin lifted his head from the back of the booth. "Sorry," he murmured tiredly. "Rough trick."
"Fuck!"
Vin was startled. Besra didn't usually get that pissed over tricks roughing up the commons, the rares maybe, but not even then, unless the con couldn't work, and Vin's work night was over.
Besra hissed orders into the communicator he carried and Vin found himself face to face with a couple of medic cons. His shoulder was cleaned and doused with healing solution and a bandage was applied. His ass was treated just as efficiently and Vin was helped to a sitting position. The healing solution was already starting to work and Vin's shoulder was merely aching now, not throbbing.
He was surprised to see Besra sitting across from him. Something was up and Vin was pretty sure he wasn't going to like it.
"You've been requested overnight." Besra didn't mince words. "The star raiders who came in earlier. They want you." Besra knew that every con in the place would have taken note of the raiders within minutes of their arrival.
Vin's whole body tensed and he closed his eyes, willing himself not to say anything that would anger Besra. There'd been four of them. He remembered that much. And there'd been a Hartoo in the bunch. And, he'd already put in his twelve hours. Dozens of tricks. And, Ezra would be there soon- and Vin wouldn't. And dammit! What the fuck had he done to deserve this life?
Vin's eyes were dull and unseeing and he wasn't entirely sure he trusted his voice. "Where? How soon?" Vin would have been proud of the fact that his voice was clear when he spoke, if he could have felt anything except the bitter disappointment that was threatening to choke him. Besra didn't care that Vin was tired and sore. He didn't care that Vin needed his time with Ezra, like he needed the air he breathed. Besra only cared for the extra credits in his pocket if Vin worked through the night. And, with four raiders to service Vin figured he'd be pretty much working through until checkout. The bastards could take turns sleeping and he'd still be fucking all night.
Besra coolly assessed his con. The human was tense. Cons didn't like extra duty, but this was more than that. The abuse from the Hartoo was part of his con's life and no more than he was used to. Besra watched the way the human swallowed and bit his lip. Disappointed. The human was disappointed about something. Ah, the rare con the human favored. They shared a bed each night. And, tonight, there would be no time together. When the common was finished servicing the raiders, the rare would be making ready for the next day's clients. Besra weighed the profit he'd lose against the gratitude the common would feel- and the rare. This human was only a common, but he was popular and invariably pulled in more credits than most of the other commons. The rare would be anxious and worried and not give maximum effort. Besra didn't want the rare con working less than enthusiastically. Less than enthusiastic whores didn't earn maximum profit. Yes, he'd lose the day, but the rare would know Besra expected the profit recouped. And recouped it would be. The rare would work later into the night and do more to entice clients. Yes, the lost profit would be recouped. Both of his cons would be refreshed and remember that they owed their master much.
"Work now. You will not work tomorrow. Neither will the other." Besra knew a winning hand when he held it.
"Ezra?" Vin whispered the word, not quite sure he'd heard Besra right. Not daring to believe it was true until Besra nodded his head and spoke again.
"The rare with green eyes, Ez - ra, will have no clients after his last tonight. You will service the raiders until checkout and then both of you will have 24 hours more free time. You may spend the time together."
Vin could scarcely believe his ears. Twenty-four hours together, with no clients or demands. He knew Besra's motive was to be sure he stayed on his knees and kept his ass in the air until checkout, but he didn't care. Twenty-four hours with Ezra, was worth the extra fucks. And, there were only four of them. Two, maybe three turns each at his mouth and ass, and their dicks would call a halt. With any luck, three maybe four hours and the raiders- and their dicks- would be passed out and Vin could get a few hours sleep. Less time he'd need to sleep later and more time to spend with Ezra. "Work now," he agreed, as if he had any real choice.
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Vin took the time to grab a shower and change. He chose a loose shirt that would pull off easily and loose fitting pants that tied in front. Pull the string and the pants would be at his ankles. No sense putting on anything that didn't come off easy. Vin stepped back into the bar and Besra was waiting for him.
"Rooms eight and nine are theirs. They paid until checkout. Be sure Besra's is their first choice next time they come to Luna Mesa."
Vin nodded and headed up the stairs.
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A knock on the door. "About time," Johnny said and jumped up to open the door. Eli Joe and Yates exchanged smirks. Vin Tanner was in for the surprise of his life.
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The door opened and one of the humans Vin had seen earlier leered at him. "That ass better be worth all the time you kept us waitin'," the human said and leaned over to get a good look at the ass in question.
"Knock it off Johnny." Vin heard. He tracked the voice and his mouth dropped open. Standing there was the Fed Agent who'd arrested him for murder, Yates. The Hartoo hadn't listened when Vin had protested he was innocent. He hadn't even checked out Vin's accusation against Eli Joe.
Yates stepped to one side and Vin's stomach dropped and he couldn't breathe. He felt like he'd been gut punched. Eli Joe. Yates and Eli Joe. Together. His knees buckled and he staggered a few steps and grabbed the back of a chair to keep himself upright.
Vin was caught in a nightmare. A nightmare he couldn't wake up from. And suddenly he saw it all with crystal clarity. Eli Joe had killed Jess Kinkaid and Yates worked for Eli Joe. He'd never had a chance. The only reason he hadn't been summarily executed was because the judge on the case had decided it was easier to fuck him if he was breathing. A fucking life sentence and the damn judge still showed up at least once a month for the free fuck Besra gave anyone who might be useful if Besra needed a favor. Vin closed his eyes and held onto the chair, barely hearing the raiders' laughter. Maybe he really had been executed and this was hell.
"You feeling OK Vin? You ain't lookin' too good," Eli Joe said. The other raiders snickered anew at that. "Sit down," Eli Joe ordered.
Vin didn't let go of the chair back until he felt it's sturdy seat under him. He wasn't altogether sure he could stay upright without the chair holding him up.
"What do you want Eli?" Vin's voice was a lot steadier than he'd thought possible.
"What do I want?" Eli Joe looked around at the others and chuckled. The other raiders' snickers turned into outright guffaws.
"You're a con, Vin. A con and a whore. Only one thing anybody wants from a whore."
Vin felt a hand slide down his shirt.
"Get offa him." Eli Joe shot up straight in his chair. "Nobody touches him 'less I say so."
The others stopped laughing and Johnny glared at Eli Joe and looked like he might challenge his words, but Vin noticed, that he took his hand out of Vin's shirt.
"You set me up," Vin stated. "And paid 'im off, not t' look close at Kinkaid's murder." Vin nodded at Yates.
Eli Joe smiled smugly. "You always were a smart one," the raider acknowledged. "We could made a hell of a team."
"And you was always a murderin' bastard," Vin answered.
Eli Joe chuckled a little and shook his head. He downed the half-finished whiskey in front of him. He smiled at Vin. "You remember what you told me, when I offered to letcha share a blanket with me?"
Vin remembered. "Told ya t' kiss my ass."
"That's right, kiss your ass." Eli Joe chuckled again and poured another dollop of whiskey into his glass. "I never kissed no man's ass, but you're sure gonna be kissin' mine." He downed the shot. "Get over there and get them clothes off and let the boys and me see what we paid for."
Vin stared at the wall behind Eli Joe. He could refuse and he'd be sent back to the camps. He honestly didn't know if he'd survive another stay in the camps, but he honestly didn't care. Would dying be so awful? Even that death? Would it be worse than this? The thought of letting these men touch him, of what they expected him to do- were the camps really so bad?
"Yes." Vin heard Ezra's voice clear as day. "You promised me. Whatever it takes." Vin remembered the promise he'd given Ezra only that morning. The same promise they gave each other each day before they separated. "Whatever it takes." The southerner's voice was soft as a whisper in his mind. Vin bit back the emotions that tried to overtake him. The shame, the guilt, the disgust, all of them, he pushed down ruthlessly. He'd promised Ezra. He wouldn't think about any of it. And, Vin got up out of the chair and moved in front of the bed and faced the raiders and untied the string holding his pants up.
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Vin toed the sandals off his feet and slipped the loose shirt over his head. His pants were bunched loosely around his feet and Vin stepped out of them. He was naked. The human and the Haricort were openly leering at him. Yates looked like the cat that swallowed the canary. Eli Joe was smiling, a strange smile Vin didn't understand at all and then he stood up. "You shoulda shared my blanket when you had your chance," the raider said and unbuttoned his pants.
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Vin sat in the chair staring at Eli Joe and Yates, sleeping in the big bed. The other two raiders had staggered out of the room drunk and sated, just before dawn. Eli Joe and Yates had kept at him for another hour, before they too had succumbed to too much alcohol and too much sex.
Vin had kissed Eli Joe's ass- and every other part of him and he'd done it to all of them. Every demeaning, degrading, thing they'd thought of, Vin had done. He'd got on his knees and he'd bent over and he'd put his mouth everywhere they'd told him to. Only he hadn't felt demeaned. He didn't feel degraded- or ashamed- or resentful- or sorry for himself. He didn't feel anything. He wasn't tired anymore. He didn't feel the burn in his ass that had to be there. Vin hadn't bothered to keep track of who's dick was in his ass how many times, but they'd all had at least one turn at it. Yates had even tried to use something- Vin thought it was an empty whiskey bottle, but he wasn't sure- to fuck him with, but Eli Joe had put a stop to that. Yates couldn't rough Vin up- at least not until the rest of them were through with him.
Yates had smacked him around a bit, but he hadn't tried to fuck Vin with anything but his dick after that. And now, Vin was sitting in the early morning grayness, wondering why he couldn't sleep and if he'd ever feel anything again. He wondered if his soul had died and was just waiting for his body to catch up.
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"What the fuck do you think you're doing? You trying to cheat us?" Yates angry words startled Vin awake. He didn't know how long it had been, since his body had given in to exhaustion and he'd fallen asleep in the chair. The curtain over the single window in the room was closed, but Vin could see the dust floating in the air in the bright streams of sunlight that came in through the tiny spaces between the wall and the curtain and the center part.
He wasn't quite sure what Yates was talking about and decided that saying nothing, was the safest course of action. Unfortunately Yates didn't see it that way and grabbed him by the hair and pulled him up onto his feet.
"I asked you a fucking question," the former agent snarled and backhanded Vin twice and shoved him back down in the chair.
"I ain't tryin' t' cheat ya," Vin answered and gingerly touched his cheek where Yates had hit him. Thankfully no blood, but it was tender and Vin figured he'd have another bruise to add to the ones the Hartoo had already given him.
"We paid good money to fuck your scrawny ass 'til checkout. You were pretendin' to be asleep, so you wouldn't have to put out anymore."
Vin figured Yates knew how full of shit he was and just wanted an excuse to knock him around some more. Not that Hartoos ever needed an excuse to beat up cons. Vin said nothing. Yates was gonna do whatever he was gonna do and Vin could only bring worse on himself by answering him.
"You ain't cheatin' me. We paid for another fucking hour and you're gonna work every second of it. You got that you fuckin' cock sucker?" Yates grabbed Vin's arm hard and dragged him over to the bed where Eli Joe was just stirring. Yates shoved Eli Joe's foot over and bent Vin face down on the end of the bed. He kicked Vin's feet apart and shoved his head down onto the mattress. "Spread your fuckin' legs, you fuckin' whore. Nobody cheats me. "
Vin braced himself for what he knew was coming. Yates grabbed his ass cheeks so hard that his nails bit into Vin's flesh. He yanked them as far apart as he could and shoved his dick all the way into Vin's ass as hard as he could. Vin gripped the blankets tangled under his body desperately. Every ache and pain in his body that he hadn't felt before he'd fallen asleep was making itself known. His ass was on fire and every powerful thrust from Yates felt like he was splitting Vin's body in two.
Vin tried to move into a more comfortable position and Yates grabbed his hair and pulled him awkwardly up. "Where the fuck do you think you're going? You ain't goin' nowhere you cock sucker. You're gonna lay there and take it." He punctuated each sentence with a vicious thrust.
"Bull shit!"
Eli Joe's voice. Vin wondered why the hell Eli Joe was interfering. The bastard sure didn't give a rat's ass what happened to Vin.
"Stay outta this," Yates demanded and shoved Vin back down and leaned heavily on him..
"You can nail him through the floor if you want," Eli Joe said. "But, my dick is fucking hard and he can blow me while you do it." Eli pulled Vin's head up and angled his hips so that his erection was waving in Vin's face.
"Shit. Sorry Eli. Didn't think o' that." Yates lifted up off Vin's body. "Hell of a lot more fun, sharing the bastard anyway. I got five credits says you come first."
"You got a bet," Eli Joe said and rubbed his dick across Vin's lips. "Open your mouth, Vin. I got a big fuckin' lollipop for you."
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Vin watched them with no real interest. He was leaning against the foot of the bed, exactly where he'd slid when Yates had pulled out of him. The other two raiders had joined Eli Joe and Yates and Vin was half surprised neither one of them had tried to prop him up and fuck him before they left.
"See you around Vin," Eli Joe said, as he stooped over and ruffled Vin's hair. "Damn shame you didn't share that sweet ass of yours with me when I gave you the chance. I'd known then what a good fuck you were, I might not have told Yates where you were."
"Bull shit," Yates laughed and opened the door to the room. Vin heard their laughter fading away with their footsteps.
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"Ah gentlemen. "Did you enjoy your night at Besra's?" Besra greeted the raiders and handed them the bill.
Eli Joe perused the bill and handed Besra his credit marker and ignored the alien's question. Besra inserted the marker into the reader and waited until the reader beeped and turned green, before handing the marker back to Eli Joe.
"Please, come back again. Besra's is the finest house in the galaxy," Besra invited the raiders. He wasn't at all sure that he wanted them back. He wouldn't know that until he'd seen the rooms they had rented- and the con.
Eli Joe and the others ignored Besra's invitation and left. The instant the door closed behind them, Besra's face lost it's smile and his eyes narrowed in speculation. His con should have reported back to him immediately.
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Ezra was getting worried. He'd gotten back to the tiny room he shared with Vin, expecting to slip into the bed and wrap his arms around his lover. But Vin hadn't been there. Besra had. Besra had told him about the star raiders requesting Vin and that Besra had promised the day to them both when the raiders left. Ezra was so excited that sleep took hours to come. He'd awakened much earlier than usual and hadn't been able to fall asleep again.
Checkout time had been a forty-five minutes ago. He'd expected Vin to slip into the tiny room they shared at least thirty minutes ago. Fifteen, allowing for a shower Vin probably wanted badly. Vin would know Ezra was worried and make his way back to the room as soon as possible. That he wasn't here already boded no good. Ezra sighed. He'd wait ten more minutes and then he'd find Vin himself.
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Besra angrily shoved the morning list at his assistant. The cleaners had called him as soon as they'd went into the raiders' room. Besra had notified the medic cons and was on his way up to see for himself what the raiders had done. He really hated star raiders.
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Vin heard the door open and he watched the cleaners come in and move about the room and he knew he should get on his feet. Besra was expecting him and would be pissed if he didn't report. Vin had learned early on in his sentence, that pissing Besra off was never a good thing. He knew he should get up, but he was too sore, too tired, and too dispirited to move.
The two cleaners responsible for making sure the rooms were fit for use when the house opened didn't know what to do with the naked con slumped against the bed. He followed them with his eyes, so they knew he was aware of them, but he didn't speak and he made no attempt to get up. They could see bruises- and blood and one of them called Besra.
Vin didn't know how long he had been there, when Besra came in, cursing in some alien dialect Vin couldn't understand. Vin could tell he was pissed, but he couldn't bring himself to care if it was Vin Besra was pissed at, or the raiders. Medics followed Besra in and Vin hissed in pain, as he was lifted to the bed and then prodded and turned and examined.
He was grateful to whoever had invented the healing solution that the medics seemed to have doused his entire body with. It would do little for his bruises, but it was already working to repair the various cuts and bites Yates and the others had inflicted. His ass would be sore until the next day, at the very least, but it no longer felt as if he was being torn in half.
Vin hadn't said a word and no one had addressed him directly yet. The cleaners had left to work on some other room as soon as Besra had entered. The medics had talked over him to one another and then had given Besra a report. Vin had lain there passively. The medics wouldn't deign to speak to him, even if he asked them questions and there was the very real possibility that he would be punished for daring to ask. Besra would tell him whatever his master saw fit to impart to a lowly common con.
Vin felt strong hands under his arms and he was lifted to his feet. His legs were shaky, but they held him upright.
"No permanent damage," Besra informed Vin. "Eat and sleep. Tomorrow, light duty only."
"Thank you, master," Vin said in a voice that was almost a whisper. Light duty meant no fucking, oral only and no tricks who were likely to be rough. After two Hartoos in one night, one of them repeatedly, Vin would truly be grateful, if he could bring himself to feel anything at all. The humiliation of the night, the despair that his life would never be different, the desperate need to keep his promise to Ezra, even the love he felt for Ezra- he didn't feel any of it. Vin wondered if he'd ever feel anything again.
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Ezra was nearly frantic with worry. It was now an hour past checkout time and Vin hadn't come to their room yet. Logically, he knew that Vin could have been delayed for any number of benign reasons. The tricks could have kept him late. Besra could have some use for him. He could simply be hungry. There were all sorts of reasons Vin could be late. However, Ezra knew in his heart, that something was wrong. He hurried to find his lover.
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Vin stood in the shower and punched in his hot water ration code. He'd eaten as Besra had instructed and he did feel less shaky. The combination of nutritious food and the healing solution was doing wonders for his physical condition. If only the hot water now cascading over his body could do as much for his soul. Vin picked up the soap and methodically tried to scrub away the filth from his body- and his life.
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Ezra had tried the common's gathering area. He'd checked the front desk. He'd checked the dining area. He'd checked the upstairs rooms. He'd checked the clinic, where cons who'd been too roughed up for the medics to handle waited for a real doctor. He'd checked the courtyard the cons enjoyed fresh air and sunshine in, without their condeeds' pain inflictors activating. He'd even checked Besra's office. The showers were his last hope.
Ezra entered the shower room, where all the cons showered. The outer door opened into a small vestibule. The inner door wouldn't open until the outer door closed. Besra was determined, that none of the various workers who came into the house, get so much as a free peek at his cons. Ezra opened the inner door and immediately heard the water running. He was also instantly aware of an unusual chill in the air. He stepped into the changing area and quickly walked to the shower area.
Vin was halfway down the row of showers soaping himself. He hadn't seen Ezra. He didn't even seem to be aware that anyone had entered the room. Ezra watched, his alarm rising, as Vin rinsed under water that had to be frigid and then lathered the same part of his body he'd just washed. When Vin began soaping himself again, Ezra hastened to his side, uncaring that the water that was indeed frigid, was soaking him as thoroughly as it was his lover.
Vin was freezing. His lips were blue and there were goose bumps on his arms and legs and he was trembling. Ezra punched in the code for his own hot water ration. As soon as the blessedly hot water hit Vin's body, Ezra gently stilled Vin's hands. He took the soap out of Vin's hands and put it in the holder. Vin stared at his hands like he wasn't sure what to do with them now. He still hadn't looked at or spoken to Ezra.
"Vin," Ezra called softly and lifted his lover's chin so they were eye to eye. Vin looked at him. His expression was dazed and he blinked, as though he'd just realized Ezra was there. Ezra was truly frightened by the blankness he saw in Vin's eyes.
"I-I g-g-gotta wa-wash it off." Vin's teeth were chattering so hard, he could barely talk.
"You're clean enough," Ezra said and adjusted the hot water spray so that it flowed over the back of Vin's head and down his back and across his shoulders.
"Ne-ne-ver g-g-g-gonna be cl-cl-clean a-gain."
Ezra felt his chest tighten. It hurt like he'd been hit with a sledge hammer. They'd promised each other they'd do whatever it took. Something about the all nighter Vin had pulled had been more than Vin could take. He'd been where Vin was right now, a few times himself. And Vin had been the only thing that brought him back. It was his turn to take care of Vin.
"It's alright," Ezra said and wrapped his arms around Vin. The water was cooling. Ezra's ration was up. He turned it off and gently propelled Vin toward the changing area.
Vin looked up at him with those awful lifeless eyes. "We g-g-gon-gonna get cl-clean now?"
Ezra's heart skipped a beat and it was hard to talk through the lump in his throat. He pushed Vin's head onto his shoulder, so he wouldn't have to see those eyes. "Yes love, we're going to get clean."
*** 7 *** 7 *** 7 *** 7 *** 7 *** 7 *** 7 ***
"Lie down now," Ezra said and pulled the blankets back. Vin just stared at him blankly and did as he was told, exactly like he'd obeyed every instruction Ezra had given him in the last two hours. "Stand still. Put your shirt on. Turn around. Walk this way. Sit. Drink." Everything Ezra had told Vin to do, he'd done, mechanically without a word of question or protest. All the while, just staring off at nothing. "Sleep," Ezra said and stroked Vin's back gently. He was equally disheartened and relieved when Vin's eyes immediately closed.
When he was sure that Vin was asleep, Ezra slipped off his own clothes and climbed into bed beside Vin and wrapped his arms around his sleeping lover. The excitement that had kept him awake late and awakened him early was gone and worry and his own exhaustion pulled him toward sleep. He could only hope that whatever Vin had been through, sleep and Ezra's love would be enough to bring his lover back to him.
*** 7 *** 7 *** 7 *** 7 *** 7 *** 7 *** 7 ***
Vin felt the body pressed up against his and an arm across his side and awakened, instantly on his guard. He blinked awake and scanned the room. His room. The room he shared with Ezra. He looked down and relaxed completely. Ezra's was the arm across his body.
Vin didn't remember coming back to their room. The last thing he remembered was Besra telling him to eat. He wasn't sure how long ago that had been. His body ached and his ass was sore, but he thought it was better than he remembered it being. And, he felt tired, but not exhausted, so he figured he'd slept for at least a few hours. Vin shifted carefully, trying to find a more comfortable position, without disturbing Ezra.
"I'm awake." Ezra leaned up on his elbow. "How are you feeling?"
Vin slowly rolled to his back. "Ain't sure. M' head's kinda foggy. The rest o' me's sore, but it ain't bad. How'd I get here?"
The relief that Ezra felt was overwhelming. Vin was back. "I brought you here," he said. "Do you remember that at all?"
Vin shook his head. "Last thing I remember was Besra tellin' me t' eat. Think I was plannin' on gettin' a shower. Ain't real sure." He looked down at himself. "Musta though. I was pretty rank."
Ezra nodded. "You did. I found you there. The water was freezing." Ezra took a breath. He pressed a soft kiss against Vin's lips and then met his eyes. "You left me," he said, hurt and bewilderment plain in his voice.
Vin's eyes searched his. "I'm sorry," he said. He rolled over, his back to Ezra and clutched the pillow under his head. All the misery and degradation that was his life came back to him, especially the night before. "I tried not to," he whispered, not denying that he had indeed left Ezra for a time. Everything he'd thought he'd never feel again was choking him. He blinked the moisture out of his eyes.
"I know," Ezra said and pressed his body against Vin's. He put his arm over Vin's shoulder and pulled his lover closer. He nosed under Vin's hair and kissed the back of Vin's neck. "I was so afraid."
Vin clutched at the strong arm across his chest and held on desperately. "God! I'm so sorry. You don't know."
"Then tell me," Ezra said. He slid the arm he'd been leaning on under Vin's side and wrapped his arms as tightly as he could around his lover. Vin's other hand came up and squeezed Ezra's arms tightly.
"I will," he promised. "Later. Just wanna sleep in your arms now. Let it all go away for just a little while. Please," he added brokenly.
"Hush love. Hush. Just sleep," Ezra said, his own voice full of emotion. "We'll talk later."
They fell asleep holding each other.
*** 7 *** 7 *** 7 *** 7 *** 7 *** 7 *** 7 ***
Vin woke first. His body's needs were demanding attention, but he didn't want to move. He didn't want to wake Ezra until he'd had time to think. What would he tell his lover?
Ezra shifted and then stirred. Vin turned to face him and brushed a kiss over Ezra's lips. "Gotta get up," he said and slid out of the bed. He walked the short distance to the bathroom shared by eight other cons and was glad to find it empty. With the exception of the room he shared with Ezra, the con rooms were empty, the doors standing open, per Besra's instruction. No one but cons entered this area and no con would dare to steal anything, knowing the punishment would be a painful death.
Vin relieved himself and took the time to wash his face and brush his teeth. When he was finished, Ezra was waiting outside the bathroom door to attend to his own needs. He touched Vin's shoulder briefly, before slipping inside and closing the door.
Vin went back to their room and sat on the bed with pillows propped against the headboard supporting his back. He was uncharacteristically nervous. Ezra was the only good thing in his life and he deserved the truth. Vin just hoped he would understand.
*** 7 *** 7 *** 7 *** 7 *** 7 *** 7 *** 7 ***
Ezra finished shaving and took a small towel from the linen shelf. He dried his hands and wiped the traces of lather off his face. He wiped the sink with the towel and threw it down the laundry chute. He looked around. Everything was in it's place. He studied his reflection in the mirror and sighed. He'd run out of reasons to put off this conversation. It was time to find out what had driven Vin away.
*** 7 *** 7 *** 7 *** 7 *** 7 *** 7 *** 7 ***
Vin tensed when the doorknob turned and relaxed again when Ezra came in the room. Ezra closed the door and set on the edge of the bed near Vin's hips. He leaned over and stroked Vin's face and then kissed him lightly. "Are you ready?" Ezra asked.
"Yeah," Vin said and chewed on his lower lip nervously. "Ya gotta know how much I love you," he said and searched Ezra's eyes. Vin's own eyes were apprehensive. He never wanted Ezra to doubt that Vin truly loved him.
"I know," Ezra said. "Just as I love you. And that's been enough. But it wasn't last night."
Vin looked away from Ezra. "Told ya, I didn't kill that fella."
Ezra frowned in concentration. "You said you were set up, by a raider. Someone you used to work with. Ellie - Elmer- Eli Joe. That was his name. I remember."
Vin nodded in agreement. "Eli Joe. Bastard ruined my life!" he said in a bitter voice. He hastily added, "'Cept you. You're the only good thing t' come outta this." Vin anxiously looked for reassurance in Ezra's eyes.
Ezra gave him a tender smile and stroked his cheek again. "It's alright. You're the one bright spot in this bleak world for me too."
Vin's cheeks tinged pink and he ducked his head for a minute, before he continued with his story. "Eli Joe killed that settler and he framed me. I tried t' tell the Agent who arrested me, Hartoo name o' Yates. He wouldn't even listen. Thought it was 'cause he was just an incompetent ass hole, who was too lazy t' check it out."
"And last night you found something out that convinced you that it wasn't just incompetence."
Vin nodded, his face gone white and his eyes haunted. "It was them. Both of 'em. Together. They're partners."
"How did you find out?" Ezra asked, dreading the answer.
Vin laughed, an ugly harsh laugh, that hurt to hear.
"How the fuck do you think I found out? They were waitin' for me, in that fuckin' room last night." Vin closed his eyes and when he spoke again, his voice had lost all it's anger and instead was filled with pain. "Jesus Ezra, they were waiting for me. Waiting to fuck me, just like they fucked me over. They had a couple buddies with 'em too."
"God Vin," Ezra whispered and reached to take his lover in his arms. Vin shrugged away from him.
"Fuck Ezra!" Vin's voice was rough with emotion. "It ain't ever gonna be no different." His eyes were wide and staring off at nothing. "Any lowlife fucker comes in here and pays and we spread for 'em or suck their dicks or stick our tongues up their asses and eat their shit."
Ezra closed his eyes against the desolation he heard in Vin's voice. He didn't try to put his arms around Vin again. Vin wasn't ready to be comforted- not yet. But, he did put his hand on Vin's leg, support, not comfort.
"How can you stand it?" Vin cried.
"I can't." Ezra's simple answer surprised them both. Vin stopped staring off into the distance and searched Ezra's eyes, his confusion showing.
"I can't," Ezra repeated softly. "Not without you. If you weren't here, I couldn't bear it." Ezra took Vin's hand in his and kissed the palm. "Do you understand how much I need you? When we're out there, I close myself off. I don't think about what I'm doing. It's not real. The only thing real is the time we're together. If you weren't here, I'd lose myself."
"I heard you," Vin whispered. "Last night, I was thinkin' that the camps might not be the worst thing-"
He was interrupted by a gasp from Ezra. Ezra's eyes were wide and shocked. "You can't mean that."
Vin ducked his head and chewed on his lip. "Don't know," he admitted. "I ain't sure there ain't worse things then just dyin' and bein' done with it. I just know that when I was decidin' if dyin' was better right then, I heard you remindin' me o' what I promised, that I'd do whatever it takes."
Ezra could see the emotions that Vin tried to hide, threatening to spill out of his eyes. Vin shook his head and blinked his eyes. "I did all them things- with them, all of 'em. And, I didn't feel any of it. It was like I was dead inside. I don't know how much longer I can do this." The last sentence was so low it was almost a whisper.
"You can do it today. Every day you do it today. The same as I do." Ezra took a deep shuddering breath. "You can't think about it being forever. You can't think about tomorrow or next week or next month or next year. You only think, today I can do this. I can do whatever it takes, today." Ezra grabbed Vin's shoulders and pulled him close. He hugged his lover fiercely and then spoke again. "And at night, when we're holding each other, you don't think about any of it. You just be glad we're alive and we're together. And you never think about what will happen tomorrow- not ever. That's how you do it. It's how I do it. If I ever have to think about tomorrow, I don't believe I shall draw another breath."
Vin reached out and stroked Ezra's cheek. "Fuck tomorrow." He kissed Ezra softly. "We got today. There ain't no tomorrow. Just today."
Ezra put a hand behind Vin's head and stroked down the tangled curls. "Today," he agreed and returned the gentle kiss. He leaned back on the bed, pulling Vin down on top of him. "I need you," he whispered and kissed Vin more urgently.
Vin cupped Ezra's face with his hands and his tongue explored Ezra's mouth hungrily. Ezra's hands caressed his back carefully, mindful of the bruises he'd seen in the shower.
"Love me," the green-eyed con whispered.
"I do. So much," Vin replied and deepened his kiss. His hands traveled over Ezra's body, exploring well known places intent on giving his lover pleasure. His mouth soon followed the trail his hands had blazed.
Ezra's body arched up into Vin's touch. He wanted to turn the tables on Vin and begin his own loving assault on his partner's body. But, Vin needed to guide their lovemaking today. To be in control of his own body and what happened to it, for these precious few minutes. So, Ezra lay back and let his body's responses and his sighs and moans of pleasure encourage Vin's tender explorations.
Vin moved up and kissed Ezra again. "Can I make love to ya? Please?" he spoke softly into Ezra's ear.
"Anything you like," Ezra murmured, his hands carding through Vin's hair.
Vin leaned back. "No," he said seriously. "It ain't about me or you. It's about us. Out there," he nodded in the general direction of the public area of the house, "it's all about what somebody else wants. We ain't got no say at all. But in here, we always get a say. Both of us. You don't want something or you want something, you gotta say it. Just like me. Else, it ain't lovemakin'. It's just fuckin'. And I had enough fuckin' t' last me forever." Vin's cheeks flushed and his voice was hesitant. "Does it make sense to ya?"
A shiver of sensation flashed through Ezra. His stomach fluttered pleasurable and his cock throbbed harder at Vin's words. He pulled Vin down and held him close. "Perfect sense love." After ten months in Besra's house, Vin was a seasoned whore, but here in Ezra's arms, he was still sometimes shy and uncertain. Ezra found it utterly charming. He kissed the top of Vin's head. "Make love to me, please."
"You ain't just sayin' that, 'cause I want it?" Vin searched Ezra's eyes anxiously.
Ezra smiled at him. "No, I'm not just saying it. And if you don't mind, sooner is better than later.
Vin relaxed, trusting that Ezra wouldn't lie to him. Vin's tongue traced over Ezra's lips, demanding and receiving entrance. He explored the hot wet depths thoroughly and then dueled with Ezra's tongue, trying to get deeper and taste more. Ezra's hands traveled down his back and settled on his ass cheeks. Ezra's hands opened to take in as much flesh as possible and squeezed the soft mounds and pulled Vin's groin against his own. Their erections swelled as they thrust against each other.
Ezra groaned and tore his mouth away from Vin's. "For God's sake, stop teasing me and fu-" Ezra smiled sheepishly at the glare on Vin's face. "Make love to me, please." He stroked Vin's cheek, relieved when passion chased the worry from Vin's expression.
Vin didn't answer, but kissed him deeply. Ezra felt Vin's hands slip between his thighs and he opened his legs wider to allow the intrusion. Vin cupped his balls and he licked his way down Ezra's torso, stopping to tease Ezra's nipples into throbbing hardness. He licked the head of Ezra's cock. He slid one finger and then two inside of Ezra, opening his lover. He deliberately avoided Ezra's prostate, not wanting to send his lover over the edge just yet. Vin wanted them to come together.
Vin's free hand stretched out over Ezra and Ezra nearly laughed out loud at the fingers searching the night stand for the small jar of lubricant they kept on hand, that was just out of his reach He might have actually laughed, except Vin chose that moment to deep throat him in one smooth stroke and Ezra nearly leapt off the bed at the exquisite sensation in his genitals. One hand carded through Vin's hair, almost of it's own volition. How he managed to stay coherent enough to slide the little jar into Vin's searching fingers, Ezra didn't know. He only knew he was glad when Vin managed to grasp the jar, not to have to think anymore. The only thing he could concentrate on was the talented mouth on his dick.
Vin fumbled with the jar. It took him several minutes and a few choice words directed at the inanimate object before he got the lid off. He scooped a generous amount and pressed it into Ezra's body and then hastily greased his own cock. He gave Ezra's cock a final lick, savoring the pearly drops oozing from the tip.
"Nooooo," Ezra moaned when cool air washed over his wet cock and Vin moved up his body.
"Yesssssss," Vin whispered and kissed him. "Gonna make love to ya now." Vin got to his knees and gently lifted Ezra's legs over his shoulders. "Love you. Love you so much," he said, pausing to kiss the insides of Ezra's thighs.
Vin let go of Ezra's legs and took hold of his hips and pulled Ezra's body down and his ass up. He lined his cock up and pushed steadily until the head slipped inside the tight ring. He waited a few seconds and then eased the rest of his cock inside. God! Ezra felt so good- so hot and tight. His cock slid inside easily Vin was shaking with the effort of holding still. Ezra took a few deep breaths adjusting to the intrusion.
Ezra couldn't move much in his awkward position, but he could and did squeeze Vin's cock, taking great satisfaction in the groan his action elicited. Vin moved slowly, thrusting in and out of his body, while his hands stroked up and down Ezra's legs. His cock raked over Ezra's prostate on each stroke.
Vin's thrusting got faster and harder, as his need overpowered his control. Ezra encouraged him, alternating demands of "harder" and "faster" with tender endearments. They were both close and Vin scooped out some more of the lubricant and coated Ezra's cock with the slippery substance. He stroked Ezra's cock, trying to match the rhythm of his thrusts.
"Vin! God!" Ezra cried out, as he grabbed Vin's ass and pulled him closer, trying to get Vin's cock deeper. His balls were so swollen and the pressure was becoming unbearable. The tingles and flashes from the dual stimulation on his cock and in his ass were pooling in his groin, seeking a way out. "Vin!" Ezra cried out again as the wave crested and then broke, leaving him breathless, drowning in the sensation.
Vin felt Ezra's cock throb and swell and heard his lover cry out and then his own release took him and for long minutes all he could do was let the pleasure grab him and wring him out until he collapsed, panting for air.
They lay as they fell, Vin's head pillowed on Ezra's stomach, with Ezra's legs still over his shoulders. Vin held onto Ezra's hips and one of Ezra's hands toyed with Vin's hair. His other was across his own chest.
Vin kissed Ezra's stomach. If he looked up, he knew Ezra would be wearing that mysterious half-smile that was only for Vin. Gently, he eased Ezra's legs off his shoulders. He got up and found a wash cloth. He cleaned them both off and then lay down beside Ezra again. Ezra turned to him and Vin motioned for Ezra to put his head on Vin's shoulder. He did and Vin kissed the top of his head and closed his eyes.
Soon enough, they'd need to get up and tend to their bodies' other needs. But for now, he was content to hold his lover and know that for today it was enough.
THE END (for now)
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