End of the Dream

by Klingoncat

Chris had taken what he believed was a firm hold on the smaller man in front of him. Then holding him still, he'd opened his mouth. "Vin," he rasped out, his physical need evident in his voice, "I want you, but not like this..."

He got no farther as the body in his arms first froze then, as the reality of who was in the booth with him hit, Vin pushed back with more force than Chris could have imagined him capable of. Slamming him into the door behind, then turning, eyes filled with shock, rage and tears, Vin grabbed the taller man and threw him over against the side wall. Before Chris could even blink the slighter man had kicked out, breaking the lock and slamming the door open. Vin pulled his pants up, fastened them and raced out the door, down the hallway and out of the bar.

"Shit!" Chris scrambled to his feet, cussing under and over his breath, and raced after the man who meant more to him than he could even contemplate. There was no question that he HAD to catch him now, because if he didn't make this right he had the feeling that he might never have a chance to tell Vin just what he meant to him.

Ezra arrived at the bottom of the stairs just as Chris flew out the door into the street, now almost 30 feet behind the other man who had almost reached his Jeep. Luckily for the blond, Tanner had yet to dig the keys out of his pocket, and by the time he had them out and in the lock, the taller man had caught up.

"Vin," Chris pleaded, "please stop, let me explain." Before Tanner could reply or move away he continued, "When I saw you with that man I knew that I couldn't stand to lose you to someone else. I realized that I wanted, needed you, Vin - I love you - please look at me."

Vin Tanner was in a state of total shock. He'd finally gotten up the nerve to actually do it, he'd picked a man who looked and even moved so much like Chris that it was almost spooky. Then he'd taken that imposter into one of the back rooms intending to finally get a release, to forget

that this wasn't the man he wanted, no, to pretend, if only for a short time that it was. Then out of the blue, it wasn't the man who looked and moved a lot like Chris Larabee... it was Chris. Vin felt like he was in some kind of terrible and wonderful nightmare all at the same time, where his every dream and desire had been handed to him on a silver platter. But the man he loved and desired had seen him pick up a man, a stranger, and go into a room to have sex. How could Chris say he loved him? He had to be totally disgusted, revolted.... he could never face his friend again. Vin didn't look at him. He simply stood, head down, defeated, the tears that he had tried so hard to hold now falling.

"Please Chris," he whispered, "just let it be. I'll have my resignation on your desk Monday."

With that Vin turned, grabbed the door handle and started to climb into the Jeep.

"Vin," Chris reached out, pulling the trembling man into his arms, "listen to me, I love you and there is nothing you could do that can change that. I'm so sorry for how I've treated you lately, I just didn't know how to react to how I felt and I had no idea that you would even consider having a relationship with another man. Please, before we both make the another mistake lets go home and talk about this."

Vin paused, considering Chris's words. He knew he wanted this man more than anything, he just wasn't sure that this was really what Chris wanted. Was it love, or jealousy or curiosity or misplaced guilt? He just needed time to sort out how to find out the truth. He couldn't stand it if he jumped in only to find out that it wasn't real. He needed to be sure that Chris was sure.3D

"You've never been with another man, have you Chris?" At the negative shake of the blond's head, Vin sighed. "Okay, I think we both need some time to think on this, and I know I need a night's sleep before I can talk to you about how I feel and about what happened tonight. So I'm gonna go home and get some sleep and I'll talk to you tomorrow."

Chris met his friend', and hopefully soon lover's, eyes. "Promise me that we WILL talk - that you won't leave or do anything drastic - like resign."

"You have my word Chris." And with that he climbed in his Jeep, started the motor and went home.

Chris Larabee suddenly realized that he was standing in the street staring after a Jeep that had been gone, for at least ten minutes. If the coldness in his bones was any indication, but then maybe the coldness had nothing at all to do with the temperature.

He re-entered the bar and forestalled Ezra's questions with a glare and a question of his own, "Where the hell is your damn snitch, Standish?"

The conman had planned for the possibility of having to explain a non-existant snitch. "I am loath to inform you, but during your absence just now..." he paused for a moment as the glare reappeared, "not that THAT is any of my concern, the informant contacted me electronically and announced his intention to vacate the State of Colorado immediately. From the sounds that I could distinguish in the background, he boarded an airplane and has departed the vicinity."

"You mean he called you to tell you he was out of here?" Chris snarled.

"I believe that is the message that I have just relayed," Ezra responded, refusing to be intimidated when he was, in fact, beginning to realize just how frustrated and distracted his boss really was. This was actually starting to amuse him.

"Shit! Could anything else go totally wrong tonight?" the blond ground out between gritted teeth.

Too late for his innate sense of self preservation to stop his mouth, the Southerner replied, "Else? Did something else go awry?"

Luckily for the smaller man, Larabee had already turned and headed down the stairs and the words were swallowed up by the general dim of the room.

Once the darkly clad stormcloud had left, Ezra returned to the table where Frank, Ernie and a number of other interested parties waited.

"Well... " Frank began, finishing the sentence with his eyebrows.

Ezra sat, gratefully accepting the brandy that was waiting at his place, "I do think that some measure of success has been attained," he paused to first raise his glass, then to sip his drink, "however, I suspect some follow up may be needed."

Ernie nodded towards the entrance by which the two men had exited, "It did seem that they have some very strong feelings for each other."

"That would be an understatement," Ezra replied., "Let us hope that they can come to terms prior to inflicting lasting bodily harm upon one another...."

With that they again raised their glasses and drank to what they all hoped was a successful night's work.

Chris Larabee's ranch
6:45 A.M. Sunday morning:

The morning light had just begun to creep in around the blinds when the blond found himself awake, spine tingling with the awareness that he was not alone. He pretended sleep while he pictured exactly where his gun was in relation to his current position on the bed. Shit, It was definitely out of reach.

The quiet drawl broke into his frantic thoughts.

"'S okay, Chris, ain't gonna shoot ya, least not 'fore we have our chat."

"Shit, Tanner, I oughtta shoot ya now and get it over with. Its barely daybreak!"

"Yeah," Vin smiled ruefully, "couldn't sleep. Figured there's no reason to put it off." He moved into the room and ran a hand through his hair."Ya sure ya want to do this? I can just move on if you want me to."

"NO! Don't go. I really need to talk and, judging from your choice in partners last night, I think you do too."

"Noticed that, did ya?" Vin blushed and lowered his head, "I'll go make coffee - give ya time to get yerself together." With that he headed down the hall.

By the time that Chris had showered and dressed, the coffee was ready and there was a stack of toast piled by several jars of jam and the honey pot. The blond filled his cup and joined his friend at the table; neither ate anything. The room was silent while they both drank their coffee, both glancing at each other when they thought they were unobserved. The second time their glances coincided they both grinned.

"Guess it's time to stop beatin' around the bush," Tanner started. "I know you were married, and a relationship with another man ain't exactly what you had planned. So I never told ya how I felt about ya, and that was okay until ya started acting weird."

When Chris started to respond Vin stopped him, knowing if he didn't say what he had to say right out it would all become a muddled mess in his head.

"No, Chris, let me say what I gotta an then you can tell me what you want me to do." The Texan continued, "I been in love once before, and I got hurt real bad when he decided it just wasn't his thing after a few months. I swore I would never put myself in that situation again. I know ya think ya might want me, was kinda obvious last night, but I gotta know that this isn't just somethin' new and interestin' ya want ta try out. I don't think I could stand it if we start somethin' and then ya leave me. So I need to know that you've thought this through."

Vin watched Chris as he told him how he felt and, although he could read this man better than anyone he'd ever known, he still wasn't sure just what was going on in his head at the moment.

The blond got up and paced around the kitchen trying to find words that would convince the gun-shy tracker that his feelings were real. They were, in fact, the most real, intense feelings he'd had for anyone, as strong as but slightly different from the ones he'd had for Sarah. Noticing how nervous Vin was becoming by his lack of verbal response, Chris decided that the exact wording didn't matter. Chris loved this man and had to make him understand that.

"Vin," he began as he walked around to where the man sat, taking Vin's hands and looking up into his eyes, "you're right, I never planned on falling in love with a man. Hell, I never figured I'd ever fall in love again. But the truth is that I have and I am. All I can do is tell you that I love you more than anything in this world and that I want to spend the rest of my life with you if you'll have a stubborn, ornery old cowboy. I don't know anything else that I can say to convince you that I mean every word and that I'll never leave you." Chris sighed then and looked up into blue pools of light that were filling with moisture. He lifted the hand he held and laid a soft kiss on the palm.

Afraid to breathe, the blond felt his heart sing when he heard the soft whisper, "Ya just said it, Larabee." Vin smiled and pulled his hands free to reach up, placing one hand on each side of Chris's face and leaning forward to place a soft kiss on the lips that he'd wanted and watched for so long.

The kiss deepened and soon Vin joined Chris, on the floor the two kneeling together, clasping each other, mouths seeking, tongues twining, learning their way. There were soft groans and gasps as they broke apart momentarily for air.

"Oh God, Chris, this is better than the sweetest dream," Vin breathed out as he pulled the other man back to him.

They resumed their exploration as hands began to find their way down the long, lean bodies. Chris groaned again, this time as the cool, hard tile made itself known. "Vin, I've never been with a man, but I do know that if I don't get up off this floor, I won't be able to stand up, much 3D less... well, you know."

Vin stood then, pulling the man he loved with him, "'S' okay, I think you know the basics." He pulled back, taking the blond's hands and leading him down the hall towards Chris's room. "We'll go as slow an easy as you want. Just let me show you how much I love you."

Chris followed Vin back through the house, his mind racing. This was it, he and Vin were finally together - well, about to be. He realized that as much as he wanted be with this man he was as nervous as he'd been the first time he had been with a woman. Hell, he was even more nervous. He'd been too young and eager to be adequately nervous back then. But this was now and it meant so much more than it ever had before. He knew as much as the next guy about male to male sex, which admittedly wasn't a lot, and none of it from personal experience. When it came down to it, he didn't have a clue where to start. He knew that he wanted this to happen and he knew that he was aroused by Vin; that had become painfully clear on so many sleepless nights over the past weeks and at the club yesterday. What if he didn't make Vin happy? What if he couldn't satisfy his needs?

Then they were in the bedroom.

Seeing the nervousness that had overtaken his partner, Vin stopped as they entered the room, not making a move towards the bed.

"Chris," he whispered softly, "Cowboy, ya with me here?"

Blue eyes connected with green and Chris realized that he had to put aside his own fears and doubts. He loved Vin; that was what was important. All that he could do was be himself and hope it would be enough.

As if reading his mind Vin reached out, gently taking his hand once again and pulling him close. "Let me love you, Chris." A pause and a crooked smile "Promise I'll be gentle with ya."

They stood a moment more, eyes saying more than words ever could, then the taller man leaned in and took the Texan's lips. Gently at first, then, as the fire ignited, with bruising passion. As his knees threatened to buckle, Larabee guided Tanner to the unmade bed, almost as rumpled as he felt from his nearly sleepless night.

They were still dressed as they fell onto the bed, but soon the buttons on Chris's shirt were open and Vin's t-shirt was yanked up and over his head as their hands and lips explored, soft groans and indrawn breaths the only sounds as fingers moved over hard, heated flesh. The feather-soft caresses that Vin ran down his torso nearly drove the blond over the edge. Chris realized that he was trembling from the sheer ecstacy of the touch. Then the feel of his hands on the younger man made him realize that he wanted the tight jeans to join the shirt on the floor, and he reached down to unfasten the button and zipper. He slipped his hands down inside the tight denim, reveling in the smooth silken skin as he ran his fingers over the firm buttocks and down the long, slim thighs as he shoved the jeans down further.

Vin moaned as the warm hands slid inside his jeans, cupping his ass cheeks briefly before moving down to his legs.

It was definitely time to remove the rest of their clothing. Vin pulled back, putting a finger to Chris's lips as he started to protest, and rasped, his voice huskier from desire than the older man had ever heard it, "Gotta get rid o' these clothes." The blond grinned and nodded as he sat up, sliding his shirt the rest of the way off, then removed black jeans and underwear in one motion, then sat back down and slid them the rest of the way off. Vin's jeans had already hit the floor; his underwear apparently hadn't come along for the ride.

They turned toward each other, glancing shyly at first and then more boldly as they each reached out to touch the other again.

Vin ran his hand along his lover's jaw, down his neck and across the sculpted collarbone. The barest sigh passed his lips as he finally was able to caress the man he'd wanted for so long. "Oh God, Chris, I never thought I'd ever..." He broke off as his voice cracked with the emotion that engulfed him.

"Shh... I'm here now and I'm not going anywhere," the older man crooned back as he began to realize just how badly, and for how long, his younger companion had wanted and waited for this. He'd nearly cracked after only few weeks of wanting. Vin had held out for much longer. Well,

his wait was about to end..

"Vin, make love to me now." Chris was ready. He was harder and hotter than he could ever remember.

The younger man kissed him, hard, their lips already swollen, sensitive to each other's taste. Vin moved down, kissing the firmly muscled chest, licking and sucking as he moved closer to the prize that he'd waited so long to claim.

The body under him bucked and moaned as he laid siege to it, sparing not an inch from his attentions. The Texan reached the flat stomach, exploring the navel, causing the man beneath to tremble as he teased the sensitive valley, then he moved lower.

Vin ran his tongue down the hipbone and over the lean thigh, pushing slightly to gain access as he slid his hand down the inside of the leg, tickling the soft skin and moving up towards the nest of golden curls at the base of the long, thick member.

Pausing for a moment to look upon the strong, proud shaft, Vin reached up to twine the fingers of one hand with Chris's, needing that extra connection, then reached up and licked the silken member from base to tip. As he swirled his tongue around the head, the body beneath him arched up in reaction. The abrupt intake of breath, followed by a moan, nearly sent the younger man over the edge as he realized that the sounds of exquisite pleasure coming from Chris were caused by his attentions; he obviously liked what Vin was doing. Opening his mouth, he engulfed the entire head and as much of the long shaft as he could, wrapping his free hand around the lower part of the organ as he sucked on the top. The fingers entwined with his tightened reflexively as the body bucked up off the mattress.

"VINNN!" Chris gasped out as the sensations overran his ability to do anything but react to the tidal wave of pleasure coursing through his nervous system. He came fast and hard as a teen, unable to control his body.

Swallowing greedily, still sucking as the seed streamed down his throat, Vin smiled, amazed that he'd pushed the older man over the edge that quickly, but also understanding what weeks of wanting could do to one's control as he felt a wetness on his own belly.

Vin slid up the now lax body and cuddled up, wrapping his arms around the still shuddering man, knowing that this was just the opening act of a long and not so lazy Sunday. After all, it was barely 9 A.M.

Chris's breath gradually slowed and deepened as he slid into a light doze. The nap was, however, short. As he drifted back to awareness he realized that his partner was snugged up against his backside, nose tucked into the nape of his neck, his breath softly stirring the longer strands of his still sweat-dampened hair. It had been a very long time since Chris Larabee had felt this completely, utterly content. He smiled, refusing to move and wake Vin. Why on earth had he fought this?

It didn't take long for the sharpshooter to rejoin him; it was as if he had an extra sensory organ that detected the other man's presence, thoughts, and even his deepest desires. Vin stretched, languidly like a cat. "Hey cowboy...wear ya out already?" he drawled lazily.

The raspy, contented voice was enough to reawaken the fire in the blond.

"I'm ready for more," he breathed out as he turned to embrace the naked body plastered against him

Their mouths met, tongues moving hungrily. The first time had been fast and frantic, good enough for a start, but they were both ready for more.

"Vin, let me touch you," Chris gasped as he broke the kiss. They were already hard and aching. He reached out to gently touch the silken steel of Vin's shaft. Touching another man was new to him, but he knew how he liked to be touched. Recalling the touches that Vin had used earlier, and how other past lovers had pleasured him, he began his own assault on the willing body beneath him. He was relatively sure that he was on the right track as a gutteral moan began to emanate from his partner. When that moan became a growl, he grinned. "Like that?" he whispered into the tousled curls.

"Oh God...Chris, don't stop!" The breathy rasp spurred him on. He moved down, not sure if he could replicate the wonderful treatment that Vin had given him so recently, but willing to try. Tanner sensed his hesitation and reached over, stopping him. "You don't have to...there are other ways."

"I want to make you feel as good as I did. I don't want to disappoint you Vin," he sighed, blushing at his inexperience.

A slender hand gripped his chin and lifted it, eyes meeting. "You won't, Chris. Being here with you is what I want more than anything. This is new for you, I can wait until you're ready." He turned then, offering his back to the blond. "This should be easy enough, just go slow and easy."

Chris knew what was on offer and, as much as he wanted to bury himself inside the smaller man, he knew that he didn't really know how to do so safely. He wasn't prepared to practice without any firsthand experience to guide him.

"No, Vin...I could hurt you. I've seen what can happen. You need to show me how." As Vin started to protest he reached over and put a finger over his still swollen lips. "I want this, I want you! Take me...you know how and you won't hurt me...please show me."

Turning back to face Chris, Vin again met the green eyes. "You sure?"

"Never more." He started to turn over as Vin had, but was stopped.

"It's gonna hurt some, but I promise that if ya give it a chance I can make ya feel good too."

"I trust you... do it!"

With that Vin reached out to stroke Chris. Using all his skill and experience he soon had the man bucking and moaning. Slowing then, wanting it to last, he moved down between the long legs, nudging them apart. Using gentle strokes he opened the nub of muscle. Chris moaned and pushed back against his hands, begging wordlessly for him to get on with it. Adding a generous amount of lubricant he eased his fingers out and began to slide his cock in. Moving carefully, literally inching his way, he paused as he felt the blond's gasp of pain. "Breath Chris..." he ran his hands gently down the sculpted body, soothing and distracting the man's attention. His efforts were rewarded as he felt the muscles relax.

He resumed his motion, still slow but gradually moving faster and deeper, knowing exactly the moment that he hit the sensative gland inside by the shiver that ran through Chris's body as his eyes widened in surprise. "Yeah, thought you'd like that," he drawled. Now urged on by the frantic thrashing below him Vin let loose and began thrusting harder. Soon both men were moving faster, their motions matching as instinct took over.

Chris had never felt anything like the sensation that swept through him as Vin's thrusts deepened. He gasped, and pushed back, meeting each thrust with one of his own, and was swept up in a tidal wave of pleasure more intense than anything he'd ever experienced. He fell over the edge at the same moment that he heard Vin cry out his name in a nearly inarticulate moan.

Once again the men lapsed into a boneless sprawl on the now thoroughly trashed bed. Time lost any importance to the men as they cuddled and catnapped the morning away. It was well after noon when Chris surfaced for long enough to really comprehend just how thoroughly contented and comfortable he was. He curled around Vin as he stirred and they shared shy smiles as their eyes met.

Hunger finally drew them out of their contented sprawl, and with a need to remain close they spent the rest of the afternoon as they often had in the past, tending the horses, cleaning the barn and catching up with minor repairs before returning inside to fix dinner. The difference today was their heightened awareness of each other; they were even more attuned than they ever had been before.

But it was still a surprise to Chris when Vin stopped midway through their meal and asked the question. "What the hell were you doing at the Diamond Club?"

Chris paused a moment, suspicion hitting him even as it had Vin.

"Ezra...that sneaky son of a bitch!"

Vin gave him the go on look so he elaborated. "He called me and said he had a snitch who would only meet with me and only there, but he never showed. I'm beginning to think that he never even existed..."

"Yeah, I think yer right. Ez's been giving me some odd looks lately. I think it's likely he set us up." Vin's grin widened as he put the pieces together. "I think we're gonna have to send him a little thank you."

"Uh huh" Larabee agreed. "I think a little bit of payback is definitely called for."

Monday 7:45 A.M.:

By the time both vehicles had left the ranch, it was obvious that they were running late. Knowing the habits of their teammates it was likely that Josiah, Buck and JD would all beat them both in. Especially since Vin was planning a stop at home for fresh clothing. Larabee sighed as he

thought about the reason for their tardiness, and realized that, whatever flack he might get from the guys, it was well worth it. At least they would arrive well before Ezra made his usual appearance.

Unfortunately the traffic heading in to Denver was particularly bad this morning, and by the time he pulled into his usual space even Ezra's Jag was in place. Vin's Jeep was also parked, which meant, given the hour, that he had decided to forego the side trip to Purgatorio.

As he exited the elevator, Chris could hear the voices emanating from the coffee room. The current topic of conversation was Vin's unusual attire.

"So, Vin," Ezra was casually commenting, "whose funeral were you planning to attend this morning?"

The man in question started. He'd hoped that no one would notice the fact that he was wearing black, his clothes having been way too soiled after an afternoon in the barn. He recovered and answered fairly quickly, claiming truthfully that he'd helped Chris clean the barn on the previous afternoon, and had to borrow since he'd stayed out at the ranch. Unfortunately his blush told the Southerner another story altogether.

Ezra only smiled slyly as he sipped his latte.

Chris's entrance caused a change of subject, since he was so seldom late. But the team leader was quite proficient at misdirection and immediately went on the offense, pointing out that they all had work to do since Ezra had carelessly let their best lead slip out of town before imparting his information to them. He gave the man his signature glare, and was glad that everyone hustled out to their desks before he met Vin's eyes. They both laughed at Ezra's indignant expression, knowing that it was as fake as Chris's glare in this instance.

The day progressed, both men trying to act normally, but it soon became obvious to the rest of the seven that the tension of the previous weeks was no longer present. The other men didn't know why, but were relieved by the change.

It was mid afternoon when the delivery man arrived. He was from a special gay delivery service that Frank had recommended when Vin had called him the previous afternoon. Dressed in a startling purple outfit, he strutted into the office calling out that he had a special delivery for one Ezra Standish, then with a flourish presented the stunned man with a huge bouquet of pink roses and a brightly wrapped package, and a kiss to the cheek. Then he swirled around and "pranced" out of the office to the cheers and catcalls of the rest of the team. The package, when opened, was found to contain a box of chocolates and a bottle of Ezra's favorite, very expensive cognac.

Buck swooped over, waggling his eyebrows at the pile of loot, and reached for the card attached, but was surprised at how fast the conman could move when properly motivated. Ezra quickly retrieved and pocketed the card.

"Aw, come on, Ez," Buck pleaded, "that must have been some date you had. Give us all the details..."

With a distainful look, and an uncharistic blush, Ezra replied, "A gentleman never tells." But shortly thereafter when the others were back at work, he slipped the envelope out and opened it. His gold tooth twinkled in his grin as he read the short message.

"Thanks, Ez," and was simply signed V & C.

The End

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