ATF Universe
Follows The Kiss
Something had changed. Hazel eyes watched shrewdly. He might be young. He might be naïve but he knew that something had irrevocably altered between his friends. Glancing at his other friends he was almost sure that none of the others had noticed. His brow furrowed in a frown as he tried to place when things had changed.+ + + + + + +
Ezra looked up from behind his computer, his eyes drawn unerringly to the bowed head of the man who had been his friend. Unbidden tears glazed green orbs that softened as they watched Vin's hands moving over the keyboard. Ezra drew in an unconscious shuddering breath as he realised he was remembering the touch of those long agile fingers in his hair. Shaking his head to clear the thoughts that tumbled through his mind as he dragged his gaze from the back of the other man's head.
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Vin sat at his computer, his fingers tapping inanely at the keys, the keystrokes not even coming close to making sense. He could feel Ezra's eyes on him, the green pools of desire that he could have drowned in more than a week ago. He inhaled sharply trying to erase the picture of slumberous desire from his mind. No amount of cold showers and sleepless nights had been able to erase the aroused image of the southerner from his mind, or the feel of his hands from his body.
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If he hadn't have been looking for it, JD might have missed the silent exchange. A small sad grin crossed his face as it suddenly hit him exactly what the problem was. The grin faded as he watched the desolation on the face of their undercover agent and the moisture that had sprung to his eyes. In that moment JD made his decision. He would, no matter how great the embarrassment to himself, say something to one of his friends and attempt to make them see some sense.
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That opportunity arose far earlier than JD had anticipated, seeing Ezra heading towards the break room he followed him quietly.
"Can I help you Mr Dunne?" Ezra asked him quietly his voice missing its usual spark of good humour
"Ez" JD spoke softly not sure how to broach the subject he had come to discuss "I..."
"What is it?" Ezra turned on him waiting patiently for JD to stop stammering and spit it out
"Why don't you say something to him?" he eventually managed
Ezra's eyes filled with a momentary panic and eased back into the bland countenance they all knew so well "I have no idea what you are talking about JD" Ezra murmured
"C'mon Ez" he spoke "I'm not stupid I have eyes" he paused "Just because I'm young don't mean I can't see things"
"Do the others know?" Ezra asked silently resigned to the realisation of the teams' knowledge
"I don't think so" JD shook his head
"I don't want to talk about it JD" Ezra spoke as he turned back to finishing pouring his coffee.
"Fine" JD murmured "But he's as miserable as you are" he paused as he turned to walk out of the break room "I thought you would have seen it, especially since you are so good at reading people"
Ezra listened to the younger man leave the room, his mind filled with turmoil, was JD right, was Vin feeling as tormented as he was himself.
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He clasped his hands around his coffee cup, inhaling deeply of the bitter scent of the brew that Vin had concocted. He took a long gulp of the thick murky brew, wrinkling his nose at the bitter taste yet he still continued to drink the hated concoction. This would be the only way he allowed himself to taste any part of the man he dreamed of becoming his lover.
"Damn Ezra" Buck spoke as he stepped into the break room "Anybody would think that coffee machine was your lover"
"What in God's name are you talking about Mr Wilmington" Ezra shook his head to clear the thoughts of a certain long haired gentleman from his mind
"You and that coffee machine" Buck shrugged with a smile "Ain't never seen you drink so much domestic coffee before"
"I can assure you Buck that if your humorous outbursts hadn't become so tedious I wouldn't need so much of this foul tasting concoction"
"Little testy today are we Ezra" Buck laughed as he grabbed his coffee mug and filled it with the brew, not noticing as the smaller man exited the room.
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~~~~~~~
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Hours later saw the team sitting around their regular table in Inez's saloon. Nothing unusual in that. The difference was tonight the tables had been turned. Tonight the watcher became the watched, as the seven men sat around the table sharing a contemplative silence and occasional snatches of conversation, Vin Tanner had slowly drunken himself into a pleasant hazy stupor.
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The team lingered until closing, Chris silently moving to his best friends side to assist him to his truck. His intention to pour the younger man into his bed before he drove out to his own home.
"Leave me alone" Vin batted Chris' hands away
"C'mon cowboy" Chris spoke placatingly as the others looked on not sure what to make of the evenings happenings.
"I ain't goin no where" Vin slapped his hand on the table "Wanna get drunk and forget"
Chris squatted down beside him, his brow furrowed in confusion "I think you are already there" he paused "Forget what Pard?"
"Not drunk enough" Vin nodded his head "I can still remember" his voice left him on a sigh "Can't stop the dreams" he pressed his closed fists against his temples and stood rapidly, upsetting the chair.
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JD watched the exchange quietly, Vin's infrequent drunkenness had been amusing at first, but as the evening had worn on he had seen the quiet way that Ezra had all but stopped breathing, watching Vin slowly push himself into a stupor. He risked a glance at the southerner and saw the same pain etched into Ezra's face that was reflected in Vin's.
"Leave me alone dammit Chrishh" Vin yelled as he grabbed the bottle of whisky from the table in front of him and staggered towards the door Chris moved to follow him, intent on saving him from whatever self destructive bent he had fallen into, but his footsteps were halted at the unmistakable sound of a gun. Lifting his eyes he found himself staring down the barrel of Vin's weapon.
"I mean it Chrishhh" he slurred swaying as he waved the gun around the whole team "Shhtay the fuck away from me"
Ezra had watched the silent byplay between the friends and knew that he couldn't and wouldn't be the cause of an irreparable rift between the two men.
"Vin put the gun away" he stepped forward slowly
"Nooooo" Vin spoke
"You don't mean that Vin" Ezra stated calmly walking forward, placing himself between Chris and Vin
"I just wanna forget Ez" Vin murmured
"I know" Ezra replied "And I'm sorry that you can't but these are your friends Vin"
"Would never shhooot you Ez" he reached forward with his other hand trying to touch the smaller man
"I know" Ezra nodded "Now give me the gun" he asked calmly. The whole team surprised when Vin calmly gave Ezra his gun and fell forward into his arms. Ezra passed the gun back to Chris content to hold the staggering man tightly in his arms.
"I'll make sure he gets home Mr Larabee" Ezra spoke softly
"Maybe I should taker him out to the ranch" Chris mused "Find out what's bothering him"
"We've got that early meeting in the morning Chris" JD spoke "Maybe Ez should take him home since he doesn't need to be in early"
"He's got a point pard" Buck spoke not quite able to wipe the silly grin from his face
"Fine he's all yours Ezra" Chris spoke calmly "Don't let him hurt himself"
"His safety is of the utmost import to me" Ezra nodded
He continued to hold the sharpshooter up as the team filed past him. He saw the threat in Chris' eye the complete ignorance of the true situation in both Josiah and Nathan, the dawning recognition in the eyes of their resident ladies man and the spark of sympathy in JD, his most unlikely ally. An ally who even leaned in to wish him good luck as he moved out of the saloon.
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"C'mon Vin" Ezra murmured as he pushed Vin backwards to stand on his own feet
"Ez" he watched blearily "Am I dreaming?" he asked confused
"I'm afraid not my friend" Ezra answered him, slipping his arm around the taller man's back and turning him towards the door
He steered him in relative silence towards the door and led him to the side of the jeep. Leaning his unusually complaint companion back against the side of the vehicle, Ezra stood in front of him and slipped one hand into the front pocket of Vin's jeans, seeking the car key.
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The last thing Ezra expected was Vin's hand snaking out to grab his wrist and push it deeper into his pocket.
"Touch me Ez" he slurred his blue eyes bright with something that Ezra refused to see
"Please" he murmured "I can't get your touch out of my mind" he lifted one hand to trace the lock of hair that had fallen over the smaller man's forehead
"I'm sorry Vin" Ezra spoke sadly pulling his hand back quickly "I never should have agreed to kiss you"
"Why?" Vin frowned his mind not working with its usual clarity
"Because it's changed everything" he shook his head then allowed himself to look into Vin's eyes
"Hasn't changed the way I feel" Vin shook his head as he leaned back against the wheel arch of his jeep, not quite willing to move away from Ezra, but finding it increasingly difficult to stand steadily.
"That's the whisky talking Vin" Ezra spoke calmly, his heart breaking at his own words "You don't mean that"
"That's bullshit Standish and you know it" vin grabbed for Ezra's shoulders trying to clumsily make the smaller man look at him "I want you" he spoke softly
Ezra clasped Vin's face in his hands and looked deeply into his eyes as he spoke "I want to believe you Vin" he spoke softly "But I know that you have spent the last week trying to forget my touch" he sighed deeply "I won't damage our friendship any further by deepening whatever it is that is between us"
"You just don't understand Ez" Vin shook his head as he leaned forward pressing his lips against the smaller mans
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Ezra leaned into Vin's kiss, his mouth opened submissively under the gentle probing of the sharpshooters tongue. His own tongue twining wetly with Vin's. Vin's hands moved down Ezra's back pulling him tightly between his thighs, allowing their bodies to be joined from hip to shoulder. Content to gently grind his hips and his own burgeoning arousal against the man in his arms. Drowning in the sensation of heaven he had been granted Ezra relaxed into Vin's embrace, one hand moving between their bodies to rub erotically along the placket of Vin's fly. Feeling the agile fingers on his aching hardness Vin pulled his mouth from Ezra's. Sliding his mouth to Ezra's ear he murmured softly into his ear as his tongue lathed at his earlobe "Take me to bed Ezra" he whispered.
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Ezra pulled back from Vin's embrace, his eyes dark with passion, his breathing rapid, quickly opening the passenger door of the jeep he stood back and ushered Vin into his car "Your chariot?" he spoke softly his accent thicker and a near whisper.
Vin moved past him, placing a quick hard kiss on his lips before he sank into the passenger seat and leaned his head back against the headrest.
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Ezra moved around to the driver's seat and started the car, driving quickly and efficiently towards Vin's Purgatorio home. He could feel Vin's eyes on him as he drove, reaching one hand across he briefly clasped Vin's hand in his before returning his attention to driving. Vin reached out and rested his hand on Ezra's thigh.
"What's wrong Ez?" he asked softly as his questing hand moved higher
"Nothing" Ezra shook his head "Everything" he shrugged
"Can I help?" he probed, turning his head to look at Ezra's prfile as he drove, his hand rubbing gently over the proof of Ezra's arousal, smiling slightly at the gentle unbidden moan that escaped Ezra's lips.
"I want nothing more than to believe that this will not change us" he spoke softly, reaching down with one hand to clasp the hand that caressed him, lifting it to his lips he kissed Vin's knuckles, then replaced them where he had found them, pressing them in place momentarily with his own hand.
"Nothing will change Ezra" Vin spoke calmly and surely as Ezra stopped the jeep at his building.
"Everything will Change Vin" Ezra spoke turning to face Vin "If we become lovers I won't be able to hide it" he lifted one hand to push Vin's hair back from his face "I don't want to come between you and our friends" he murmured as his thumb traced Vin's bottom lip "I couldn't bear it to see you hurt"
"You're not going to hurt me" Vin licked the tip of Ezra's thumb as he spoke
"I would rather spend the rest of my life in hell then only know one night of pleasure with you" Ezra murmured
"Don't you understand yet?" Vin spoke exasperated "My life has gone to hell because I walked away from you"
"I...." Ezra started to speak
"I can't think, I can't work, I can't even sleep without feeling your lips on mine" he paused brokenly "Your touch is all I can think of Ezra" he looked deeply into tear filled green eyes "I want you Ez" he spoke as he climbed from the jeep.
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Confused by Vin's revelations Ezra rested his head on the steering wheel, trying to piece his thoughts together. Several minutes later, his decision made, he lifted his head and slid out of the seat and walked up the stairs to Vin's apartment. Opening the door he quickly stepped inside. He knew unerringly where he would find the man he was about to make his lover.
The sight that greeted him as he stepped into the bedroom took his breath away. Vin had made it as far as his bedroom, his shirt and jeans in a pile beside the bed, his long lean legs bare to Ezra's hungry gaze
One leg dangling off the edge of the bed, his foot resting flat on the floor beside him. His chest rising and falling slowly as he slumbered. One long arm folded back against his forehead shutting out the outside light.
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Ez sighed deeply moving to the bedside, pulling the sheet higher, his gaze lingering longingly on the black satin boxer shorts that Vin wore. Kneeling at the bedside, he carefully lifted Vin's leg and made sure that he was properly covered. Gently moving the arm that covered Vin's eyes, Ezra leaned forward and placed a soft tender kiss on Vin's lips before he straightened and walked regretfully from the room.
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